9. Jane
9
JANE
‘ B ye!’ I said as I whizzed past the dining room, shoving the warm toast and jam I’d wrapped in foil into my bag.
Dad had gone to the bathroom and I’d used that time to slip into the kitchen to make breakfast to go. But now he’d returned to the dining room, I needed to leave before he roped me into another one of his depressing conversations.
Bill was coming back to finish fixing the roof this morning, so I’d offered to go in early to give him access, which meant I couldn’t afford to be late. Actually, that reminded me. I should ask Jess if she’d found out what Bill and Theo had meant when they’d said the roof leak was suspicious.
‘Wait!’ Dad called out. ‘I need to speak to you.’
I sighed and my whole body slumped as I turned around and trudged back to the room.
‘Good morning.’ I tried to sound upbeat.
‘You came home late yesterday, so I didn’t get to talk to you. ’
‘I had to work,’ I said. Admittedly, I could’ve left a couple of hours earlier than I did, but I had to finish Office Delight and it was easier and more relaxing to do it at the library.
‘You spend too long at that bloody place. You might need to cut back soon so you can help me out.’
‘What?’ I frowned.
‘I decided yesterday. I’m sick and tired of the state of this country. And you’re right. I shouldn’t complain. I should do something to help.’
My eyes widened. Had my words finally penetrated his thick skull? Hmmm. Something told me that was wishful thinking.
‘What are you going to do?’
‘I’m running to become a local MP. It’s time changes were made, and I’m the man to do it.’
Oh. Dear God.
The man was deluded.
When I’d said he should help, I’d meant do something to help support people in need, like volunteering to help refugees so he could learn more about their plight, for example. Not becoming a bloody local politician.
The last thing this town needed was someone like him inflicting his bigoted views on everyone.
‘Dad, I don’t think that’s a good?—’
‘And you’ll need to get married. Or at the very least, engaged.’
‘Sorry, what ?’ He’d shocked me before, but now my jaw was hanging on the floor.
‘If I’m going to talk about the importance of family values, I can’t have a spinster for a daughter. You’re in your thirties. You should be married with kids by now, not wasting your time reading sodding books!’
What the actual fuck?
Throughout most of my teens and early twenties, Dad had constantly harped on about the ‘dangers’ of mixing with boys. When one of my school friends got pregnant at fifteen, he didn’t stop banging on about how disgusting it was.
He constantly ranted about the perils of sex and ‘loose’ women. And now he was chastising me for keeping my legs closed, which was exactly what he’d insisted on?
What a twat.
‘And what about Wayne?’ I asked, still trying to process the latest crap to come out of Dad’s mouth.
My brother seemed to be able to live to a completely different set of rules to me. He didn’t work, only helping out in the shop whenever he felt like it. He rarely got out of bed before noon, didn’t lift a finger around the house and seemed to spend most evenings down the pub with his mates. If I did the same, I’d never hear the end of it.
‘He’s a man. That’s different.’
Anger bubbled in my stomach. I opened my mouth to speak, then closed it again. Just when I’d thought this man couldn’t shock me anymore with his narrow-mindedness, he said something that proved me wrong.
I wished I could tell him what I really thought about him.
‘I’m going to be late for work.’ I stormed out of the room, then through the front door.
Once I was halfway down the road, I let out a long, frustrated exhale.
I didn’t know how much longer I could take living in that house. Dad was awful at the best of times, but if he was running to become a local politician, it’d be unbearable. Especially if he expected me to stand beside him and support his stupid opinions.
I couldn’t do it. I disagreed with everything that came out of that man’s mouth, but I had nowhere else to go.
Anyone I’d ever known here had moved away. I’d cut contact with all of the friends I made at the bookshop after I left because I was too embarrassed about what happened, so there was no one I could stay with. And my other relatives were just as toxic as my parents.
Jess and Theo had a spare room in their cottage, but I knew Theo had recently transformed it into a home library as a place for Jess to relax and unwind after work, so there was no way I could impose. Plus, I was their employee. It wouldn’t be right.
I had no one.
I just had to suck it up for a little bit longer. After all, I wasn’t the first person who had a rocky relationship with their parents.
Jess said that before her mum passed, things were tricky, and she didn’t even keep in touch with her father. I knew Theo and his dad didn’t get on. Jess even mentioned that Mrs Davis, who was clearly a kind lady, hence why she’d given Jess a million pounds to set up The Romance Library, seemed to have a difficult relationship with her son too, so it wasn’t unusual.
The only person I really knew that had a great bond with their parents was Jackson. I remembered him saying that his dad was amazing and super supportive and I knew how much his mum doted on him, but maybe that was the exception, not the rule .
As soon as I got on the train, I pulled out my Kindle and escaped into a new romcom. By the time I arrived at Sunshine Bay, I was feeling calmer. Books always made me feel better.
When I arrived, the library was already open and Jess and Theo were standing by the side of the building, where Bill was climbing the ladder.
‘Morning!’ Jess chirped as she saw me approaching.
‘I’m not late, am I?’ I glanced at my watch, certain that Bill was coming at eight in the morning. It was five to.
‘No, no,’ Jess reassured me.
‘It’s my fault,’ Bill called down. ‘I phoned Theo to ask if I could come earlier just to make sure I’d finished before the library opened.’
‘And it was short notice, so I didn’t want to call at the last minute to ask you.’
‘I wouldn’t have minded,’ I said.
‘It’s fine. We were already up and at Sweet Treats anyway. Speaking of which…’ Jess paused. ‘Theo, you okay to take care of this whilst I have a chat with Jane?’
‘Sure.’ He nodded.
‘Is everything okay?’ I frowned.
‘Course! Maddie mentioned that she was thinking of organising a girls’ night?’
‘Sorry! I meant to ask you as soon as I got in yesterday, but then you told me you’d hired Jackson and with the training and brainstorming, it slipped my mind.’
‘No worries! Anyway, Kara is up for it and so am I, so Maddie suggested maybe next Friday night at the Seaview Arms. Are you free? Theo can lock up here.’
‘Sounds great!’ I said, happiness instantly flooding my chest .
Like I’d said earlier, I no longer had a friendship group, so it’d be good to change that. The idea of a night out with the girls seemed like just what I needed to take my mind off life at home.
‘Perfect. Maddie’s coming over later to discuss the cafe, so I’ll let her know.’
‘Speaking of the cafe, Jackson and I came up with a list of names yesterday…’ My voice trailed off as my thoughts drifted back to how good it felt to sit beside him, listen to his ideas, stare into his eyes, inhale that delicious scent…
‘Great!’ Jess said, snapping me out of my fantasy.
‘I’ve typed them up, so I can email it to you if you like?’
‘Yes, please. If I could have a read before Maddie arrives, that’d be even better.’
‘I’ll get straight on it. Oh, and I wondered if I could ask Sarah for her input too? I thought she might have some ideas.’
‘Good thinking! You’ve got her number, right?’
‘Yeah. I’ll text her. What time’s Jackson in today?’ I asked, trying to sound casual.
‘Nine thirty.’
‘Do you want me to help him with anything?’
‘No, it’s okay, thanks. I need you in the library today. Jackson will be in the bookshop with Celeste. She’ll be showing him the ropes before she leaves.’
Celeste had started as a volunteer, but after Jess had seen how great she was at recommending romance books, she’d insisted on paying her to work part-time, which was really decent. She’d be going back to uni in a couple of weeks, though, hence why we desperately needed an extra pair of hands. Trying to run the library and the bookstore between just me, Jess and Theo six days a week was proving almost impossible.
‘Oh.’ I tried to mask my disappointment. ‘Okay.’
My stomach twisted. Celeste was confident, outgoing, pretty and fun: the kind of woman I reckoned Jackson would date. And for some stupid reason, I was a little bit jealous that she’d get to spend the day with him. It was ridiculous. I had no claim on him, so I needed to get over myself.
‘Actually, I might ask Celeste if she wants to join us on Friday night.’
‘Great!’ I said. I had nothing against Celeste. She was nice. In fact, she was kind of an inspiration. She was twenty, so eleven years younger than me, but she had the confidence of a woman twice her age. If I had ten per cent of her self-assurance and assertiveness I’d be happy.
Rather than focusing on Jackson and Celeste spending the day together, I was going to think about the fact that next week I’d hopefully be making new friends.
I had something fun to look forward to and another reason to spend more time away from my parents’ house.
And that was a win in my book.