Chapter 18 #2
“I think we all know where I stand, so I’m going to stay out of this conversation,” Rachel said, and laughter broke out, easing the tension of the moment.
“When do you head back to Florida?” Hallie asked, voicing a question that Reese herself had been wondering. Not that she minded Rachel being around; she’d been nothing but kind since their first run-in, and she’d provided a much-needed activity partner for Reese’s mom.
Really, the big question was when she’d be coming back to pick up that mantle again. Reese loved her mom, but there were only so many hours in a day.
“We leave tomorrow, but I think we’ll be back sooner than later.”
“Great,” Hallie beamed. “Then we can all do this together again when Sydney’s back, too.”
And, in spite of what a strange group they made, Reese found herself sincerely hoping that they would.
“So Jennifer just texted. She’s not going to be able to make it.” Brynn put down her phone, staring around the room. “I guess we can order dinner, then?”
Reese had been at Brynn’s apartment for less than an hour, and the hits just kept coming.
Reese was one of four bridesmaids and had expected at least a little bit of a buffer tonight, provided by women who would be far closer to Brynn and able to provide the right type of excitement for her impending nuptials.
Reese didn’t think she fit the bill on being that person for so many reasons.
Kate, Brynn’s cousin, had let Brynn know a few hours ago that she’d been called into surgery near the end of her shift. She was a neurosurgery resident at Boston General, so Reese couldn’t really hold that against her.
Too much, anyway.
And two other women was still a perfectly adequate number of people to let Reese slink into the background. They could joke and squeal and do whatever it was that Brynn wanted to do tonight.
Jennifer and Carrie were both Brynn’s friends from undergrad, and with all of them around twenty-six, Brynn’s age, she was banking on them to bring the enthusiasm.
Sadly, that wasn’t to be the case.
Carrie had tapped out first, citing that her sister had an emergency, and Carrie was providing childcare.
Annoying, from Reese’s perspective, but she couldn’t really begrudge the woman. Probably.
So they’d been waiting on Jennifer, the last hope to diffuse Reese’s responsibility toward hyping Brynn up about making, in Reese’s mind, the most ill-advised decision of her young life.
Which was why Reese let out a long, quiet sigh when Jennifer’s text came through. She reached for the open bottle of wine on the coffee table and topped off her glass.
Reese had stared down her father while he looked at her with hostility in his eyes.
She’d dealt with board members who made decisions outside of any common decency and stared her down while they did it.
She’d wrangled Grant, whose drunken spittle had flecked her outfit while he’d blamed her for everything going wrong in his life.
And yet all of that paled in comparison to handling Brynn in this moment, who didn’t even realize that she should probably be upset.
In a way, it made things easier for Reese. If Brynn wasn’t distressed, which was astounding in its own right, then Reese should follow her lead.
“What are you thinking about for dinner?” Reese asked, standing up with her glass and walking over to a floor-to-ceiling bookshelf that covered one of the living room walls.
“Originally, I was going to have us all do a tasting menu at Nori Nori, but when I decided I wanted a more casual night, I figured that we could still order sushi.”
Reese tried to hide how the pieces were clicking into place, and she pretended to study the titles of the books on the shelves. Nori Nori was probably the most sought-after reservation in Boston, unique because it was only two private rooms for a nine-course tasting menu for dinner.
She couldn’t be sure, but for Brynn’s college friends, at least, it seemed like maybe a slumber party had less of an allure than a reservation at the most exclusive restaurant in Boston.
Guilt hit her at the current state of Brynn’s romantic and personal lives. And maybe, more than a little, she still felt badly about earlier today, when she’d been on the verge of being disparaging to Brynn.
Sure, she didn’t understand her future sister-in-law, but that didn’t mean that she was dumb. Or that she didn’t know what decisions she was making.
Which was further evidenced by… “So you’re into philosophy?” Reese asked as she finally focused on the titles before her. There were rows and rows of books by authors Reese had never heard of.
Brynn looked a little shy then, even younger when you added in her navy pajama set with pineapples repeated across the top and shorts. “I just finished my PhD in philosophy in the spring. Modern analytic philosophy, to be exact.”
Reese’s brows lifted, and she touched one of the spines. “So, I guess you and Grant have a lot to talk about then?”
Brynn laughed. “Well, most people don’t want to talk about philosophy, so I can’t exactly hold that against Grant either.”
“So, what comes next?” Reese asked, changing the subject but keeping it high level. Trying to get into anything related to philosophy, she was quickly realizing, would be like bringing a knife to a gun fight. “Teaching?”
Brynn came to stand next to her at the bookshelf. “Still figuring that out.”
Reese realized, as they stood shoulder to shoulder, that she had an opportunity here.
She was already a glass of wine deep—not enough to be drunk, but her tongue was a little more loose, and she had questions that, for weeks, had been begging for answers.
“So, tell me more about you. I think this is the first time we’re really hanging out one-on-one. ”
“Well, I’m an only child.”
Reese pointed at Brynn with the hand holding her wineglass. “Which I already knew.”
“Hmm…” Brynn scrunched up her face in thought. “Well, we’ve already covered my academic pursuits.”
Reese made a little ‘aha’ sound, like the idea was just coming to her. “Tell me about you and Grant. That is what we’re here celebrating, after all.”
“I can say that I never really saw Grant coming,” Brynn said, her voice full of earnestness.
“What do you mean?” Reese asked casually.
“Studying philosophy, from the outside, looks a lot like having your head in the clouds. I wasn’t looking for anyone. I finished undergrad and went right into my PhD program, which was pretty rigorous.”
Judging by the number of books, Reese thought that ‘rigorous’ was painting too merciful of a picture. But then, that seemed to be Brynn’s whole thing, understating everything about herself.
“How did you two meet?” For someone who’d spent their life making sense of the world, Brynn wasn’t exactly forthcoming with information about her own place in it.
Brynn rubbed affectionately down the spine of one of the larger books. “There was a social event at a business club in Boston. I went as my dad’s guest, and I met Grant there. And he was so…”
Irritating? Grating? Frustrating?
“Charming,” Brynn finished, and Reese just managed to hold back her surprise. But it made sense, given that Brynn had agreed to marry him.
“So you two started dating?” Reese knew she was treading into dangerous territory.
At this point, she didn’t really believe that Brynn knew she was a party to infidelity, but Reese still wanted to know for sure. It would determine how the rest of the night went, at least on Reese’s side.
“It was a little more casual than that at first, but I guess you could say that. He asked for my number, and then I didn’t hear from him for a few weeks. One day, he reached out, asking to get drinks.”
Romantic , Reese thought, making sure not to say the quiet part out loud.
“I was deep into my penultimate year of my program, so it really didn’t matter to me one way or another.”
“Had you dated before?” It would make sense, if Brynn had no basis of comparison, how Grant had snuck in through the side door and given her the impression that he was a stand-up guy.
“I had a boyfriend in undergrad, Gregory. He was my best friend.”
Reese lifted her eyebrow, mostly eyeing her almost empty glass. “And what happened with Gregory?”
“Devon happened,” Brynn said very matter-of-factly, her fingers dancing over to another book.
Maybe Brynn wasn’t as naive as she seemed, if she skipped from Gregory straight to Devon. “So, you and Devon?”
Brynn shook her head. “No. Gregory and Devon. Gregory accepted that he was gay, and a lot of things started to make sense. ”
“Gotcha,” Reese said, polishing off her drink. “Are you two still friends?”
Brynn nodded, smiling genuinely. “We are. He’ll be at the wedding in September.”
Yes, the wedding. That was still, against any sense Reese could make of things, pushing forward, full steam ahead.
“And it makes it really nice, having one of Grant’s exes there, too. I’m just really glad everyone could stay friends.”
Reese couldn’t hide the side-eye that she gave Brynn, who luckily, didn’t seem to notice.
They really needed to order dinner. The second glass of wine had gone straight to Reese’s head, and she had all kinds of comments sloshing around in her brain that she had no right to ask.
“I wouldn’t qualify Grant and Sydney as friends. She’s my girlfriend, and he’s my brother. That’s about the extent of it.” She felt the need to defend Sydney’s honor in this moment, that she’d never willingly have stayed in Grant’s life after what he’d done.
Did Brynn know?
The million-dollar question reared its head again.
“I’m glad you two found one another,” Brynn said before a look crossed her face. She had almost said something, then stopped.
“Go ahead,” Reese encouraged her.
Brynn pursed her lips. “I have to admit, after hearing how hard she took the breakup, it was a bit of a surprise to see her pop up in your life.”
So Brynn was more observant than she let on. At least if it was about anything outside of her own relationship.
And she was implying, even if it was true—but not for the reasons she thought—that Sydney couldn’t let go of the past.
Reese didn’t like that.
And with that admission, it became clear that Brynn hadn’t been aware that Grant and Sydney had still been together when she had met Grant .
Reese warred with how much to say, but her need to be honest was mounting. Neither of these women deserved to have Grant in their lives, and Brynn didn’t have all the facts.
Still, she wanted to couch her language as much as possible, mostly for Brynn’s sake. “I know that most people want to present the best version of themselves in a new relationship, but Grant didn’t break up with Sydney. It was the other way around.”
There, she’d set the record straight without divulging too much.
Brynn squinted, clear she was trying to make sense of this information. “You’re saying that Sydney broke up with Grant. Why?”
Oh, the list was endless. Narcissism. Selfishness. Infidelity.
This is what it had all been building toward, which some part of Reese had known from the beginning. Could she pull the trigger and upend Brynn’s world? Would it even matter?
Lots of women stayed with men even though they were cheaters.
And once Brynn found out, she may shoot the messenger. Metaphorically, of course.
But Reese didn’t owe her brother anything, and she didn’t want Brynn walking into her marriage blind. She should move forward, or not, with all the information available to her.
“He cheated on her,” Reese said before she could talk herself out of it. It was strange, how saying the words felt so good and so awful at the same time. She was voicing the truth but knew that it came at the expense of a good person caught in the crossfire.
Brynn’s face crumpled. “No. He said that long distance had gotten to be too much. And that even though Sydney wanted them to make it work, he was ready to settle down and get more serious, which wasn’t possible with her career.”
Reese pinched the bridge of her nose. In for a penny, in for a pound.
“I believe what Sydney’s told me, Brynn. And maybe it was a fluke, but she caught him. That is why they broke up.”
Brynn began to pace the room, back and forth in front of the coffee table adjacent to the bookshelves. Reese walked over to the sofa and sat down. She stared at Brynn, who looked like a video game character who had to turn around when she got to the edge of the screen.
“Why are you telling me this?” Brynn asked. She stopped and stood with her hands on her hips. The emotion in her voice wasn’t anger or sadness, but genuine confusion as she tried to make sense of what Reese had just told her.
“I like you, Brynn,” Reese said with a soft smile that didn’t alleviate the tension radiating through her body.
There was no stuffing the cat back in the bag, so she pressed on.
“Let me be clear, I’m not doing this to hurt my brother, even though he and I don’t have the best relationship.
I’m doing this because I think that you deserve the truth, and I don’t think that Sydney’s name deserves to be disparaged.
And I’m a big fan of having the facts in order to make decisions. ”
She could see Brynn thinking, slotting everything new that she’d just heard into place. “Grant didn’t mention that he’d dated anyone else after Sydney before we met. I’m just having trouble fitting the pieces together.”
Oh.
Oh no.
Sweet, honest-to-a-fault Brynn hadn’t taken the last step in working out the logistics.
It was coming. Reese could feel it coming.
“So… Grant cheated on Sydney with someone, but for whatever reason, they didn’t work out. And then he met me.” Brynn’s voice wasn’t hopeful enough that Reese believed she was trying to find an alternate possibility to the truth she knew deep inside.
Reese squinted, her whole face tight. She didn’t want to do this. She didn’t want to do this .
The idea of giving someone the facts and watching the realization play out in real time were orders of magnitude apart, and it was something Reese herself hadn’t understood until this moment.
“You said Sydney walked in on them? Did she know the woman?” Brynn ran a hand through her hair. A piece stuck out at an odd angle when she dropped her arms back to her hips. Reese would have laughed except she was on the verge of crying.
She needed to put an end to this. The feeling gripped her, overwhelming, like she’d crumple if she didn’t get to the finish line soon.
“Brynn,” she said, sitting up straighter and looking her in the eye. “It was you.”