4. Chapter 4
Chapter 4
CHRIS
I sink down onto the couch beside my mom and hand her the steaming cup of chamomile tea I made her. She glances up at me and tries for a smile, the corners of her eyes crinkling while I assess her with concern. Her normally sleek blonde locks are slightly tousled from running her hands through them, the blue of her eyes dull with fatigue.
I sling my arm around her as she takes a sip of her tea, waiting for her to break the heavy silence. “Well, that could have gone better.”
“You know it’s not personal, right? Charlotte’s reaction?” I ask.
Mom sighs and leans into my side. “Yeah. Garry wondered how she’d take the news. I guess we have our answer.”
I run a hand over the back of my neck, wondering how to phrase my next question. The couple of times I’ve met Garry, I’ve come to like him. He’s a pretty chill dude, and most importantly, good to my mother, but I’d be lying if Charlotte’s words don’t get under my skin at least a little bit. I don’t care if he seems like Mr. fucking Rodgers. Charlotte’s known him for a hell of a lot longer than any of us.
“And you’re sure? About him, about getting married?”
Mom leans back, peering at me over the rim of her mug. “You know he’ll never replace your father.”
I shake my head, because that’s not what I’m concerned about. “It’s not about that.”
“Is it about the things Charlotte said?”
I nod. “Can’t say it didn’t give me pause.”
Mom reaches out and gives my hand a squeeze. “I know all about Garry’s relationship with his ex and why they got divorced. I also know about his dating history afterward, so I’m not going into this blind. Things aren’t always as they seem. Charlotte might be upset with him, but there’s a lot more going on than what’s on the surface. She’s hurting, and I can’t say I blame her. Still didn’t stop me from hoping her reaction might be different, though. The kids are thrilled, especially Quinton. They’re practically begging me to run off with him and elope, which makes me realize just how desperate they must be for a male role model now that you’re gone.”
Mom shrugs, and I feel the weight of her words like a javelin to the chest. It seems I can’t be everything to everyone like I’d hoped, at least not while I’m securing my future.
“I guess no matter how good of a mother I am, I can’t replace their father,” she says. “And even though you were such a good influence on them, you’re all grown up”?she ruffles my short blond locks with her free hand?“and you have your own life to lead. Selfishly, I was really hoping you and Charlotte would instantly be on board because that would make everything so much easier. We can get married without her blessing, but I know it’ll hurt Garry. And what hurts Garry, hurts me. The last thing I want is to start a marriage on cracked foundations. What if it destroys their already brittle relationship? Will he resent me? Will it break us?”
Mom swallows, blinking away the moisture in her eyes, and her unshed tears nearly break me. There’s nothing worse than seeing your mother cry. I spent the bulk of my childhood controlled by the threat of her tears.
“First of all, if this is what you want, you know I’m excited for you,” I say, genuinely meaning it. “No one deserves this more than you, and I will support you, one hundred percent. And second, underneath Charlotte’s woolly exterior is a soft center. She’s like a PayDay bar. Kind of crunchy on the outside and a little rough around the edges, but smooth and sweet on the inside. She’ll come around.”
My mother hums a noncommittal sound like she doesn’t believe me, and though she tries to smile, it doesn’t reach her eyes. “I’m not so sure. I don’t know.” She shakes her head. “Maybe I was naive, and honestly, a little selfish, but I pictured her and I becoming friends. I imagined shopping together and picking out our gowns. After six boys, I thought it might be nice to have another woman around.” She huffs out a bitter laugh and the sound lances me in the chest. “Silly, huh?”
My stomach squeezes.
Fuck.
She’s on the verge of tears; I can feel it like a fucking barometer?the heaviness in the room, the emotion hovering above us like a storm cloud. Any minute the skies will open unless I can find a way to release the pressure.
“Not silly,” I say, and then because I can’t help myself, “I’ll talk to her. I can change her mind.”
Mom barks out a laugh. “You sure about that? I saw the way she looked at you, and her reaction to discovering you’re my son wasn’t exactly a positive one.”
I grin, thinking of Charlotte’s whip-smart tongue and her rosebud lips curved into a frown. I wouldn’t mind going to war with either. “Oh, now that’s just how Lettie shows affection. She actually adores me.”
Mom snorts. “Chris, I don’t think?”
“Leave it to me. Before long, you’ll be picking out gowns and getting mani-pedis while you trash talk the men in your lives. If anyone can sway her, it’s me.”
If anyone can sway her, it’s me?
Was I fucking serious?
I step outside onto the front porch as I shake my head. I have as much pull with Lettie as a wet rag.
I twirl my car keys in my hand as the cooling autumn air wraps around me, sinking its fingers beneath my hoodie and chilling my bones.
I like the cold. It clears my thoughts, helps me think. The cold for me is football weather, pumpkins, leaves, corn mazes, hot cider, and bonfires. It’s all the things I love about fall.
My breath puffs in front of me in a cloud of vapor as I stare out at the road in front of me when Garry’s voice cuts through the silence. “Well, that didn’t go as well as I hoped.”
I glance toward the sound to find him sitting on the wooden swing at the far end of the porch, hunched forward, his hands clasped between his knees.
“It didn’t go great,” I confirm. If I blame anyone for how poorly today went, it’s him. Whether it’s warranted or not, Charlotte is his daughter. Their relationship is his to nurture.
“Is your mother okay?” he asks, his voice gravelly with concern.
“She’s okay now. I made her a cup of tea, and she took it into the den.”
I can’t blame her for being upset. She really wanted Charlotte to like her, and it would be hard not to take Charlotte’s anger at their impending nuptials personally. Still, it sucks that my mom finally found the chance at happiness, and it can’t just be easy. After losing my father almost seven years ago to an unexpected aneurysm and raising six kids on her own, she deserves everything easy and good that comes her way.
“I love your mother,” Garry says, staring down at his hands.
“You don’t have to?”
“No, I want to. I need you to know as her oldest son that I love her, and I only have the best of intentions at heart. The things Charlotte said . . . I’m not going to deny that I dated a lot over the last couple of years. The divorce from her mother wasn’t easy. It took its toll on all of us, and in hindsight, I was trying to smother my own pain. Because of that, I have regrets. A lot of them.”
He rakes a hand through his hair, his posture stiff. “But when I met your mom, everything changed. She makes me feel alive in a way I haven’t felt in a very long time. Hell, maybe ever. She makes me feel like maybe I’m not an awful person, that there’s good in me yet. That my mistakes are just that?mistakes. And because of that, not only can I have a second chance, but I might even deserve one.”
He meets my gaze and the fire in his eyes tells me he’s sincere, that he means every word. And that’s enough for me.
I open my mouth to speak, but he beats me to it. “I don’t deserve your mother. She’s the most incredible woman and human being I’ve ever met, but I can promise you that I will do everything in my power to deserve her love every single day.”
Emotion clogs my throat, making it hard to speak. I swallow, pushing it down. “I appreciate that, and I may not know everything about your past or your divorce, but my mom does, and she still chose you, and that’s enough for me. So, if you’re looking for my blessing, you have it.”
Garry rises to his feet, shoving his hands into his pockets as he clears his throat. “I appreciate that.”
“And as far as Charlotte goes . . .” I trail off, unsure of what to say about it. I’ve known for a while from hanging around Brynn that Charlotte is a spitfire, a woman unafraid of making her mind known; it’s one of the things I like about her, but clearly, there’s more going on with her than meets the eye.
“She’ll come around,” Garry says.
It’s what I said to my mom merely moments ago, but somehow coming from him, it feels fabricated.
I arch a brow like I’m unsure, and he grimaces. “Hopefully. Your mother deserves better than what Charlotte gave her today.”
“I think we both know Charlotte’s reaction wasn’t about my mom,” I say, unsurprised by the urge to defend Lettie. Ever since Jace became glued to Brynn’s side last year, I’ve spent a lot of time with her brunette best friend, much to her chagrin, and I’ve grown a fondness for her I can’t explain. One I cover with sarcasm and humor.
Garry’s eyes round in surprise before he nods. “No, it wasn’t. I suppose you’re right. I just want to give your mother everything. I want this to go well so damn bad.”
“And I appreciate that, but I’ll admit, even I was blindsided by the news you’re getting married. Talking to Charlotte a little more, giving her heads-up things were serious and headed in that direction so she had time to digest this might’ve gone a long way. I understand wanting us to share in your excitement, and I am excited for you, I really am. Whatever my mom wants, I support one hundred percent, but you have to remember she’s your daughter first.” Stepping forward, I slap a hand on his shoulder. “And it seems whatever is going on with Charlotte starts with you.”
He releases a ragged breath and rakes a hand over his jaw. “Damn. You’re a smart young man, you know that? Someday, a girl is going to be lucky to have you.”
I smirk, wondering how he would feel if that girl was his daughter.
“I’ll talk to Charlotte,” I promise.
Garry’s eyes widen. “Yeah?”
I nod.
“Thank you.”
“No need to thank me.” I jiggle my keys in my hands as I turn toward the porch stairs. “I’m not doing it for you; I’m doing it for my mother.”