CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Deacon
I know something is wrong as soon as Amelia opens her front door and ushers me inside. She’s tense and unsmiling.
“Are you okay?” I ask. “Is Harper okay?”
She narrows her eyes, her shoulders rising. “I’m DogPerson.”
Damn it. She knows. And the only reasonable option is to tell her the truth. “I know.”
She lowers her chin, blinks once, then looks up at me with so much anger and hate in her eyes, I take a step back and bump into the door.
“Get out,” she says.
“I’m sorry, Amelia. I wanted—”
“I don’t want to hear it. You lied to me. We’re done. Get out.”
She’s right. I lied to her. I broke her trust. Clearly, that’s a deal-breaker for her. As it should be, obviously. I can’t help giving it one more try. “I was trying to do the right thing. You—”
“Lying is never the right thing.” Her words are decisive and spoken through gritted teeth, her cheeks flushed with anger, her eyes shimmering with pain. Pain I caused. “Get out.”
Cash’s words ring in my head. He’s right. If I stay, I’m crossing the line to creepy stalker, and I’m disregarding her wishes. I’m not going to be that guy, no matter how much it hurts to grab the doorknob and let myself out of her house.
I don’t remember the drive home or climbing the stairs to my room.
“Hey, man,” Cash says when I walk into our room and flick on the light. “I’m trying to sleep here.”
I turn off the light, feeling numb and hollowed out. “Sorry.”
“I thought you were staying at Amelia’s tonight.”
“We broke up. You were right. I was becoming the creepy stalker guy.”
“Sorry, Deke. We’ll go out this weekend and find someone to take your mind off her.”
I go through my nightly routine and get into bed, but I don’t sleep. I replay every chance I had to tell Amelia the truth and how badly I screwed up.
No matter how I spin it though, the outcome doesn’t change. Amelia was never looking for anything more than casual, and I was never going to be the guy who could change her mind.
I get up in the morning. I go to work. I eat my three meals a day and I do my job, but everything feels grayed out and dull. Even Sebastian’s moods don’t affect me.
After work, three days after Amelia dumped me, I take off to the mountains. I hike until I can’t breathe and can’t think about anything beyond the pain in my quads and in my lungs, but I still see her face with every step I take. I still hear her angry demand for me to get out.
Most of all, I remember the pain on her face. Casual or not, I still had the power to hurt her, and I did.
I get home in the dark, sweaty and exhausted, but the ache in my chest is still throbbing and the idea of another night in my bed, reliving my breakup with Amelia, is out of the question.
I get back in my truck, and I head to my favorite bar. Maybe I can drink Amelia away.
***
“Hey, butthead,” Cash says as he pulls my comforter off. “Get your hungover ass out of bed. You’ve got a job today.”
I roll onto my back and glare at him. “I’m off today.” Only because there’s currently nothing for me to do at any of our job sites.
“You’re never off,” Sebastian says from the doorway. “There’s always something to be done. What the hell is wrong with you, anyway? You woke us all up stumbling back here drunk last night.”
“I’m taking a fucking day off,” I say. My head is pounding, my mouth tastes like I licked the sidewalk, and my damn heart still hurts. I’m taking a day in bed. I deserve it.
“Millie got a call for a job asking for you specifically, asshole,” Cash says. “They heard about your cat gym for Amelia, and they want one in their house.”
“What the hell is a cat gym?” Sebastian asks. Clearly, he wasn’t around when Millie passed this message to Cash. I wonder what they were doing together?
Knowing Cash, they were just talking business because he seems to be able to turn off his emotions and attraction like a fucking robot.
“It doesn’t matter,” I say. “I’m not doing it.”
“It’s like a climbing gym installed onto a wall, but for cats,” Cash says. “Here. Like this.” I assume he’s showing Sebastian pictures on his phone, but I don’t care enough to lift my head and verify.
“You should have told me about this,” Sebastian says. “People love any kind of shit for their animals. Go do the job.”
“Free will,” I say. “I still have it.”
“What the hell is wrong with him?” Sebastian asks.
“He broke up with his girl,” Cash says.
“This the girl Deke was trying to set me up with? Levi told me you ended up falling for her yourself. Serves you right if she dumped your ass.”
That startles me enough to look over at my older brother, but he doesn’t look like he’s about to storm into the room and bash me. “How long have you known?”
“Only a few days,” Sebastian says. “I was looking at opening my own account and found out I already had one. I asked Levi to track down the scam artist, and he told me the whole story.” Sebastian shakes his head. “Fucking waste of time that should have been spent working for your family.”
“You joined a dating site?” I ask, feeling like I’ve slipped into an alternate reality.
Sebastian’s eyes narrowed. “My dating life is none of your business. Looks like you’ve been punished enough this time, but if it happens again, you’ll never survive the prank war I start on you.”
“Got it,” I say. “I’ve learned my lesson.”
“What happened anyway?” Sebastian asks. “I thought you’d sworn off romance.”
“He changed his mind,” Cash says.
“I was an idiot,” I say with a groan. “It fucking hurts.”
“We don’t have time for you to heal your broken heart,” Sebastian says. “I like this idea of cat gyms for you when we don’t need you at a job site. Get your ass out of bed and go see this client.”
“I thought you said there are always things for me to do at a job site.”
“He’s gone,” Cash says. “Get up and put some clothes on. You don’t even have to shower. I’ll drive since your truck isn’t here. At least you didn’t drive home drunk.”
“I walked. It was an extra-long walk because the sidewalk kept moving.”
“Jesus, are you still drunk? Doesn’t matter. Get up, sober up, and meet me outside.”
I sit up, my head throbbing. I don’t have the energy to fight this many yapping brothers. “Why are you going with me?”
“Because whoever heard about the cat gym you did for Amelia is probably one of her friends, and I’m not sure they aren’t luring you to their house to kill you.”
I manage to get myself out of bed and dressed.
I don’t bother with a shower, because what’s the point?
The sight of food makes my stomach roil, so I skip breakfast and go straight out to Cash’s car.
He’s the only one of us without a work truck, and his sporty car is a two-door with no room for anything.
“Hope they won’t expect me to start work immediately,” I say as I slide into the passenger seat.
“Not likely.” Cash slots his phone into its spot on the console and starts the car. “Whatever happens, dear brother. I’m not risking my face if you deserve the punch.”
“Thanks a lot.”
“You’re welcome.”
I take a little nap while Cash drives, and I don’t wake up until he slams on the brakes in front of a cute cottage-style home on the edge of the mountains.
“What the hell, man?” I ask, wiping drool from my chin and trying to keep my head from falling off my neck. “You trying to give me whiplash?”
“Does that look like one of Amelia’s friends?”
I focus on the man stepping out onto the front porch, his chin tipped up like he’s ready to fight, his arms by his sides, hands fisted. I swallow hard. “That’s her ex-husband.”
And behind him walks out our cousin-in-law, Amelia’s brother Asher.
“Right,” Cash says, rubbing his hands together. “This should be fun.”
"We should leave.” I so don’t want to get punched today. Or to feel worse than I already do. “Obviously, neither of them wants a cat gym.”
Cash gets out of the car as if he didn’t hear me. “Closure, bro.”
I roll my eyes, which only makes my head hurt worse. I could just stay in his car, but then he’ll probably say something idiotic to Amelia’s brother and her ex that will only make things worse.
I ease myself out, trying to find the strength to look tough.
“You look like shit,” Bryson says as I mosey up the stairs at the pace of a slug.
“How do you know? You’ve never met me before.”
Bryson raises his brows and looks at Cash, who’s grinning like he’s just won tickets to Monster Jam in Vegas. “He totally looks like shit. He’s so hungover I had to pull over for him to puke halfway here.”
“No, you didn’t…” Oh, wait, maybe I didn’t just dream that.
Bryson scowls. “You’re a partier? A heavy drinker? Melly doesn’t need that in her life.”
The way he uses that nickname for her is like nails on a chalkboard.
Asher stands behind him like a bodyguard. He’s wearing a tank top that shows off every one of his oversized muscles, and the way he’s got his arms crossed over his chest just accentuates his ridiculous biceps.
“He doesn’t normally drink much at all,” Cash says. “It’s the emotional stuff that gets to him. He wants to avoid it. Last night, he avoided feeling sad about Amelia by going out and getting drunk.”
“Cash,” I say through gritted teeth. “Shut up.” I’ve had enough of this. I glare at Bryson and Asher. “What the hell do you want? To punch me? Yell at me for lying to your ex-wife?”
“I told him he should tell her the truth as soon as he found out,” Cash says. “As soon as Levi put four and four together and figured out the woman Deacon was messaging on that dating app was the same woman he was dating, I told him to tell her, but he didn’t listen.”
“She didn’t want to hear it,” I say, rubbing my temples. “She wanted casual from both of us.” I squint. Why didn’t that sound right? “From online Deacon and IRL Deacon. If I’d told her, she would have dumped us both. I thought I could convince her I was worth getting serious for.”
Bryson studies me. “Amelia thinks you knew who she was all along. She thinks that meeting at the hardware store was arranged. By you. She thinks you’re a stalker and a liar.”