Chapter Six
I love it when I get what I want. And I’m not just stating that from the point of view of the youngest child who is therefore doted on. I’m saying that from the point of view of someone who just really loves the thrill of winning.
While standing in front of the library’s old, worn doors that are so crooked we have to use a chain after school hours to keep them closed, I smile at Principal Major, and he smiles back. My smile is real, and I’m sure it radiates nothing but the elation I feel. Principal Major’s, on the other hand, reminds me of how Sheba snaps her teeth together each month when I try to get her to take a heartworm prevention pill, no matter what kind of treat I wrap it in. But oh, the taste of watching Principal Major trying to stomach putting up a celebratory facade today has been delicious.
“Just a few more shots,” the district photographer says. “Look here and smile. On one, two, three.” A series of flashes has me seeing bright dots in my vision, but my smile remains still in place.
“Is that it?” Principal Major asks. His tone isn’t exactly gruff, with him being on his best behavior in front of Superintendent Watts, but the strain is there.
“Wait, did we get enough ‘before’ pictures in the library?” I ask, just to get on his nerves. I’m going to milk this victory as long as I can.
Superintendent Watts laughs and winks at me. She obviously knows what I’m doing, and I’m not ashamed. If I can put up with Principal Major’s attitude for nine months, he can get through a dozen or so pictures.
“How about we head outside and join the rest of the celebration?” Superintendent Watts suggests.
“Finally,” Principal Major mutters. “Miss Rogers, I’m sure you can close up in here.” He gestures for everyone to follow him through the doors and leaves so quickly I’m beginning to wonder if he’s got something against libraries as a whole.
“Do you need help?” Superintendent Watts asks me.
“Don’t worry, I’ve got it. I’ll see y’all outside in a few minutes.”
Superintendent Watts and the rest of the crew going to the Mars simulation—Jordan, Simone, and our newest recruits who joined in the nick of time, Angie and Renee—follow after Principal Major, and I’m left by myself.
I find the heavy chain on top of one of the desks. Instead of grabbing it and closing the doors right away, I take a moment to stand still and soak in the quiet of the library. I let the scent of books (and what I suspect might be a trace of mildew) wash over me. Accomplishment washes over me too. If everything goes according to plan, this will be the last time I see the library like this. Old, dreary, sad, and in desperate need of more love than Mrs. Yates can give it.
I start walking along the shelves, looking at the colorful spines, then can’t help myself and act like I’m a little kid in the library again. I close my eyes and run my finger along the book spines before stopping on a random one. The book I pull out dates itself with an illustration of a boy with messy brunette hair and crooked glasses, and despite the clear protective plastic, the hardcover is falling apart and about ten years past ready to be retired. When I open the book to the copyright page and see it was published in 1992, I shake my head. It doesn’t get any better when I randomly select six more.
There is no reason for me to have to pick up nearly ten books before finding one that has someone with a brown face on the cover. We’ve got too many books out in the world for that to be a reality for kids at this school.
“If books are supposed to bring joy, why do you look like you’re in physical pain?”
I start at the sound of Roman’s voice, but don’t turn to him. I slip the book I’m holding back in, ensuring it’s in the exact same spot I got it from.
“I don’t know what you mean,” I say.
All I needed was to be able to get through the remaining school days, and then I would no longer need to worry about running into him for the whole summer. But now I look to my left and there’s no way for me to escape. The shelves are pushed together to make space for detention, and this particular row intersects into a T. Not only is it a fire hazard, it means the only way out of this aisle is through Roman.
My pulse quickens at the realization that he must have sought me out. There’d be no other reason for him to be in here. I don’t know why he would, though. I thought we said everything that needed to be said outside his dad’s office.
Realizing that he’s obviously content to stand there and not say anything, I finally turn and face him. It’s a mistake. His unwavering gaze is on me, saying a dozen little things at once. Like, he’s sorry and please forgive him and don’t write him off like all the other teachers have. But, God, do I want to write him off. Just barrel past him and escape like I did before.
But I also don’t want to be that vice principal who becomes unapproachable once someone makes one mistake.
“What can I help you with, Mr. Major?” I ask, once again not using his name so that the part of my brain controlling my attraction to him gets the hint that this man is off-limits and someone I need to keep at arm’s length. Though being alone with him in the library doesn’t help either of those goals.
Roman doesn’t answer right away. He stretches his arm in front of me, though not close enough to touch, and pulls out the book I was inspecting before. It feels like it’s been forever since I last got a whiff of him, and my senses feel the effect double time.
“ The Body Book for Boys ,” he reads, lifting his eyebrows.
My cheeks heat in physically painful embarrassment. I wasn’t paying attention to the titles of any of the books I picked up, only the condition they were in.
“Maybe I’ll make this a requirement in my class for next year,” Roman says, his joke easing some of my discomfort. “Having to suffer through three class periods after gym classes ain’t for the weak.”
“Only three? Lucky you. According to Angie, it’s bad all day.”
My lips begin pulling into a smile until I remember I’m not supposed to be on any kind of overly friendly terms with Roman. I let the smile fade before it can fully bloom. As my smile vanishes, so does the light in Roman’s eyes. He sighs and slides the book back on the shelf. Only he isn’t as meticulous as I was, and it ends up in the wrong spot. I try to leave it as is but eventually cave and right his wrong.
“Someone needs to learn to respect libraries,” I mumble under my breath while grabbing The Body Book for Boys and placing it where it belongs, two slots to the left.
“Sorry,” Roman says.
“It’s fine. At least you kept it here in the reference section and not somewhere like, say, crafts.”
“Naw, I wasn’t talking about straying from the Dewey decimal system.”
I snap my head to him, eyebrows raised. We love a king who throws library terminology around as easily as discussing the temperature outside.
“I mean,” he continues, “I’m sorry for telling people you were moving.”
We’re back to that again. I just want to forget about that morning. “I know. You already apologized and I accepted, remember?”
“I remember. I just know that it bothered you, and I didn’t want us to end the year with this animosity between us.”
“There’s no animosity between us,” I lie. He quirks a dubious brow and I shrug. “Okay, fine. Maybe a little. I guess I’ve just been hurt since finding out your dad canceled all the plans for the library. It seems like something you could have told me anytime I saw you in the morning.”
“I didn’t know about the library,” he says, and this time I raise a dubious eyebrow. “I’m serious. I know everyone thinks me and my dad have this super-tight relationship, but it’s not like that. He doesn’t tell me his plans. He just does what he wants and expects everyone to roll with him.” He shakes his head like it’s something he’s experienced a lot of from his dad. Honestly, it sounds exactly like something Principal Major would do. “If I had known, I would have told you. I respect what you’re trying to do here, Bri—Vice Principal Rogers. Everything you’ve done this year for the students and teachers, and the way you’ve put up with my dad. And now that you’re about to give up your summer to make sure the library still comes through, it’s just…” He pauses, his eyes searching my own, and I get the feeling he’s seeing me . Not Vice Principal Brianna who battles with his dad every day, but the woman trying so hard to just make a mark in the world so she’ll feel a little less insignificant. “Amazing. I want you to know that I think you’re amazing.”
He stops talking, and I hold my breath, wanting— needing— him to say more. I need him to elaborate on all the ways he thinks I’m amazing so I can luxuriate in the way my insides are going all warm and tingly.
Maybe he reads it in my body, because he takes a step forward and goes on. “I don’t agree with how my dad has handled things this year. Especially where you’re concerned. You deserve so much more, Brianna. You deserve—”
“Miss Rogers!” comes a high-pitched voice.
Simultaneously, Roman and I jump apart. We turn to find Monique standing at the opening of the aisle where Roman was before.
Monique looks between us, and at first I’m worried she’ll say something about us being alone. I can imagine her little voice singing, Miss R and Mr. Major sittin’ in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. Honestly, I don’t hate the image that evokes, but it would spell bad news if she went around yelling about anything she thinks she saw.
Blessedly, the sweet child blinks up at us innocently and cements her place as my favorite student. “Miss Rogers, there you are. I was looking all over. The food trucks are here, and the superintendent asked me to escort you out there.”
“Thank you, Monique,” I say, and look over at Roman. “I guess I better close up in here and head out.”
Leaving the seclusion of the shelves, I grab the chain and head for the doors. Roman stands just outside the library. He looks at Monique, who’s apparently taken her job to heart and isn’t returning to the celebration without me, then he looks at me. It feels like we’re leaving a million things unsaid, but it’s probably better this way. I turn away to close the door and he makes his way down the hall.
“Is Mr. Major your boyfriend?” my ex–favorite student asks as we pass empty lockers.
Roman is ahead of us but luckily not in hearing range. I tear my eyes away from his sexy-as-sin walk and try to look composed as I answer. “Of course he’s not. Why would you ask? Because we were back there? We were just talking about books and the new library.” It’s probably way too much of an explanation and a simple no would have sufficed, but Monique doesn’t seem to mind.
She shrugs. “Oh, okay.”
When we reach the front of the school, where the drop-off circle has been converted into a mini festival, Monique goes off on her own and I let out a breath. I inhale again, and the scents of turkey legs, smoked chicken, and street corn cause me to salivate.
Once our crew was complete and everyone agreed the grand prize money would be put toward the library remodel, Superintendent Watts insisted on a celebration both in honor of school officially being over and to send us off on the simulation. Much to Principal Major’s dismay. Students, parents, and teachers walk around with food and balloon animals. There’s a booth from one of our local independent bookshops with colorful books displayed on tables and a tent with NASA employees in blue-and-white shirts surrounded by curious students. My heart is so full as I take it all in, and I don’t know whether to explore or eat first.
Before I can decide on any direction, I see Superintendent Watts walking my way. She smiles and waves to students running by with cotton candy, then stops beside me. “Look at how excited everyone is. You keep making moves like this, you bring home that money for the library, then I don’t see how anything will be able to stop you. Not an unyielding principal”—she pauses and clears her throat—“or his ambitious son.”
I’m almost positive I make no outward movements or sounds, but when she brings up Roman, my muscles lock. Did she somehow see us in the library together? Did Monique report back with the news? I knew I was too gracious in calling her my favorite student. I hope she’s not running around telling anyone she can about what she thinks she saw. Scandal! Scandal! flashes before my eyes, but I blink it away and try to remain composed.
“Honey, I get it,” Superintendent Watts goes on. “He’s young and he’s got it going on with his smooth walk and bedroom eyes.” I want her to stop. “But there are plenty of men with the same attributes. You’re a rising star, Brianna.” She levels her eyes at me, making sure each word she says has maximum impact. “Don’t let the wrong decision set you off course.”
I swallow, feeling like a Goody Two-shoes in trouble for the first time. “I won’t,” I say. And I mean it. I have no plans of doing anything with Roman that would jeopardize my career.
Superintendent Watts must believe me, because her eyebrows relax and she gives my hand a brief squeeze before walking away.
I let out a slow breath. In hindsight, I should have left the library once Roman apologized. Bulldozed right through him if I had to.
But then I would have missed how he held his breath while waiting for me to accept his apology and how his eyes softened when he called me amazing.
God, I am a mess. At least this is the last day I’ll see him for a couple of months. With my mind focused on completing the simulation and winning the money, I will be way too occupied to worry about him.
On that hopeful thought, I start walking around again. I wave at students and accept wishes of success from the grown-ups. They’re as excited as we are at the prospect of a better library. I slow down as I come upon the bookshop’s booth. They’ve got a wonderful, diverse selection of Middle Grade and YA books, as well as a table loaded with essential bookish items: bookmarks, tote bags, reading lights. I pick up a cute book-themed kaleidoscope and aim it at the sky, twisting the end to see changing prisms with red, green, and yellow. When I set it back down, I see a kid with shoulder-length locs shove a graphic novel in front of his mom’s face.
“Can I get it, Mom? Please?” he asks, nailing her with puppy dog eyes.
She makes him sweat for a moment but eventually caves and says yes. I clench my fist in victory. If she hadn’t bought the book for him, I would have been tempted to, and then I would’ve gotten stuck buying books for every other kid out here to make it fair.
I keep walking and spot Principal Major talking to Renee. Renee looks uncomfortable, and while I sincerely hope she isn’t getting chewed out for some arbitrary reason, I don’t have the energy to go run interference. I do, however, have the energy to give Principal Major a mocking wave when he glances my way and scowls. Jerk.
Next I come across a group of people dancing around a speaker. Scratch that, it’s Angie dancing while a handful of people stand around recording her. I don’t remember her ever mentioning being a professional dancer, but she is on point with those moves. Her arms alternate between fast and slow movements without missing a beat. She’s doing the Beychella “Everybody Mad” dance. It’s not the same song, but I’d recognize those iconic movements anywhere, and she’s nailing them better than any majorette could. Watching her almost makes me wish I could jump right in, but I am not trying to be the vice principal who goes viral that way. I’ll have to live vicariously through Angie and be glad she can dance so well without her back bothering her. Ha.
I smile to myself and look around, unsurprised when my eyes land right on Roman as he stands on the other side of the circle, holding a huge turkey leg in one hand and a white cup in the other. It’s the fall dance all over again as we both stand on the outside with no one to cut up with but each other. I’m not upset at him anymore, and despite Superintendent Watts’s warning, I wiggle my eyebrows as if to say, “ Where does a computer sciences teacher learn moves like that anyway? ” However, something gets lost in translation. Instead of answering, Roman walks around everyone and comes to stand with me.
He holds the cup out. “Corn?”
I swallow back my shock as I look from the cup of corn, with its layer of cotija cheese and chili powder, to the turkey leg to Roman’s lips, then force my eyes back to his and shake my head no. “No, thank you.”
He shrugs and bites down on the turkey leg. It’s the biggest piece of poultry I’ve ever seen, but he handles it like a champ.
“Is it good?” I ask.
I take his muffled “Mmm” as confirmation before laughing and turning back to Angie, who’s now dancing with some students.
I play it as cool as I can, but my mind is racing. I’m all too aware of Roman’s presence beside me and my hammering heart that won’t give me peace whenever he’s around. And why is he hanging around like we do this all the time? Why did he seek me out again?
Answers float in my head, but they can’t be right. He didn’t seek me out because he likes me. He doesn’t feel the connection I’ve felt tugging between us all year. Then again, he did call me amazing. I don’t think I’ll ever forget that. He also seemed sincere about not liking how his dad treats me.
Superintendent Watts passes by with a colleague and catches my eye, glancing between Roman and me with a frown. A silent warning not to get caught up in any trouble. I know she means well, but I can’t help bristling slightly. I don’t need anyone trying to warn me not to get too close to Roman. We’re standing here watching Angie dance. It’s not like we’re about to do anything crazy out in the open.
When a breeze stirs the air and a fresh wave of Roman’s cologne washes over me, as I inhale as much of the scent as I can, I consider the possibility that the superintendent is right about her warning. I fake a cough and take the tiniest step away to put some distance between us.
“You sure you don’t want any?” he asks.
One of these days I’ll learn not to meet his eyes, because they get me every time. I look at his outstretched hand that’s once again offering up the corn and want to erase the distance I just put between us. Maybe I’m too easy when it comes to Roman, but I can’t think of a reason I should hold a grudge against him. I need to get rid of the crush I have on him, and I will, but not today. Today I’ll savor one-upping Principal Major, as well as the support of our community and their belief that we’ll do well in the simulation. And I’ll share some corn with Roman.
“Actually, I think I’ll try it after all,” I say, and take the cup from him.