Chapter 151
Ellie POV
There is no light.
I think I’m dying again.
The thought comes quietly.
Almost calmly.
Because I know this place.
I’ve been here before.
But this time…
There’s no warmth.
No white light.
No second chance is waiting for me.
Just darkness.
Endless.
Cold.
The emptiness presses in from every direction until I can’t tell where I end and it begins.
It feels familiar.
But wrong.
The last time, I woke up.
The last time, I was given another chance.
This time feels different.
Permanent.
I curl inward instinctively.
Arms wrap around me even though I don’t remember having a body anymore.
Even though I don’t know if there’s anything left to hold.
The cold sinks deeper.
Into places I don’t have names for.
And then the thought comes.
Slow.
Distant.
Like it’s rising from the bottom of an endless ocean.
Did I waste my second chance?
I close my eyes.
Or at least, I think I do.
Because I don’t even know if I still have them.
I fought so hard.
I fought everyone.
The Moon Goddess.
The bond.
The expectations.
Dominic.
Everyone who tried to tell me what my life was supposed to be.
I wanted freedom.
I wanted my own choices.
My own future.
So why does it feel like I’m ending up right back here?
Alone.
Cold.
Gone.
Maybe no one ever really gets to finish their story.
Maybe everyone leaves with unfinished words.
Unsaid apologies.
Things they wish they had done differently.
A strange sadness settles over me.
Like ash.
I curl tighter.
And for the first time…
I don’t want to fight.
I don’t want to prove anything.
I don’t want to be right.
I just don’t want to disappear.
I don’t want to be alone.
I don’t want this silence.
I don’t want this cold.
Please.
The thought isn’t directed at anyone.
There’s no one here.
But I beg anyway.
Please.
I want warmth.
I want to feel the wind again.
I want to smell my mother’s cookies baking in the kitchen.
I want sunlight.
I want laughter.
I want…
I stop.
Because there’s one thing I want more than I’m willing to admit.
I want Dominic to know.
I want him to know—
Something hits me.
Not gently.
Not like the white light from before.
This is different.
This is life.
It crashes into me all at once.
Heat.
Sound.
Feeling.
Everything rushes back.
My chest burns.
My limbs ache.
My skin remembers itself.
My body returns so suddenly that I can’t breathe.
Pressure presses against my chest.
Warm.
Urgent.
Real.
Tears fill my eyes before they even open.
A sound tears out of me.
Half gasp.
Half sob.
And before my mind understands anything…
I lean into it.
Because something in me recognizes it.
My hand lifts weakly.
My fingers tremble as they search.
Searching for warmth.
Searching for something familiar.
They find fabric.
A heartbeat.
A person.
Dominic.
I knew him before this life.
And somehow…
I know I would recognize him in any life after this one, too.
My eyes fly open.
Air tears into my lungs.
A desperate, painful breath.
Tears spill immediately.
The room comes back in pieces.
White lights.
Blurred faces.
Movement.
Voices.
But none of it matters.
Because I see him.
Dominic.
Right there.
Holding me.
His eyes are wide.
Shining.
Like he’s staring at something impossible.
Like, he still can’t believe I’m real.
His hands are everywhere.
My face.
My shoulders.
My arms.
Like he needs to make sure I’m actually here.
Like if he lets go, I’ll disappear again.
I try to say his name.
“Dom…”
It barely comes out.
A whisper.
A broken sound.
And then he pulls me against him.
Hard.
Not enough to hurt.
Just enough to hold.
His arms wrap around me like he’s terrified the universe will take me back.
His breath shakes.
His whole body trembles.
“You’re here.”
His voice is rough.
Almost disbelieving.
“You’re here.”
A shaky breath.
“You’re—”
He can’t finish.
And somehow, that says everything.
Around us, the room becomes silent.
I barely notice the healers.
The frozen expressions.
The way everyone seems afraid to move.
Afraid to disturb whatever just happened.
My fingers weakly grip the front of Dominic’s shirt.
“Thank you.”
My voice is barely there.
Thin.
Broken.
But real.
I’m alive.
Again.
I don’t know what happened.
I don’t know how I came back.
I don’t know what he did.
But he was there.
He always is.
The relief comes first.
Then exhaustion.
A tiredness deeper than my bones.
Deeper than my body.
Like my soul has been fighting for too long.
Dominic lets out a breath.
Like he’s been holding it for years.
Carefully, he adjusts his hold.
Not letting go.
Just easing me back enough so I can breathe.
I don’t pull away.
I don’t fight.
I simply rest against him.
My head settles against his shoulder.
His warmth surrounds me.
And for the first time…
I don’t run.
I don’t push him away.
I don’t fight the connection.
I just stay.
Because maybe…
Maybe fighting him forever only brought me back to that cold, empty place.
And gods…
I never want to be there again.
Not until I’m old.
Not until I’ve lived every moment I’m supposed to live.
Not until I’ve had the chance to finally choose what comes next.