Chapter 18 #2
Emotion balled in her throat. “What have you done?” He took a step toward her, but she jerked away. “I don’t need your comfort, I need the truth.”
He swore and then dragged his fingers through his hair. “Hell, Flora, it’s not what you think. Don’t jump to conclusions before you hear me out.”
“Then tell me. Explain to me what I heard was wrong.”
“You only heard part of it. The least important part. Argyll has nothing to do with how I feel about you.” He searched her face, hoping for any sign of yielding, but she looked as hard as ice.
“A few months ago, the king ordered me to Edinburgh to appear before the Privy Council. I knew that as soon as I left Breacachadh, Hector would attempt to take the castle, so I sent my brother to court in my stead.” His jaw hardened.
“But instead of hearing the merits of the case, the king had John tossed in prison to try to force me to accede to the will of the Privy Council.”
That stopped her. “But you said that John was—” She stopped herself. Another lie. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I thought you would ask too many questions, questions I wasn’t ready to answer. I figured you would realize that because of our bond of manrent I would go to your cousin for help.”
“Which you apparently did.”
He nodded. “I sought his influence with the king to release my brother. I happened to be there when word of your elopement with Lord Murray arrived. As you can imagine, he was furious. He agreed to help free my brother and use his influence in getting my castle back if I put a stop to the elopement and convinced you to marry me instead.”
His words spun in her head. She felt dizzy, trying to sort through the damning words of his betrayal.
“So I was a bargaining chip. You and my cousin planned all of this from the start. The kidnapping, the wooing, everything.” Her chest squeezed.
“Why didn’t you just force me? It would have been easier than going through this whole charade. ”
He gave her a stark look as if he couldn’t believe she would think that of him.
“Argyll knew Rory would never force you to wed. And your cousin cares for you; he did not want to see you hurt.”
“Cares for me? Surely you jest. Neither of you thought of me at all. I was just a means to an end. Argyll wanted to get rid of me, and you wanted his influence. I’m sure a rich wife only sweetened the pot.”
He’d never wanted me. It wasn’t what she thought … it was worse. She’d been bartered and sold like a prized heifer. Flora felt as though her heart had been ripped from her chest and everything that she thought was good and beautiful had been twisted into something black and ugly.
She didn’t want to believe it. How could she have been such a fool? How could she have forgotten the one truth that had defined her life since the day she was born—she would always be seen as a prize. Always.
His eyes narrowed, and she could see the muscle in his jaw start to tic. “You’ve got it all wrong. The bargain with your cousin has nothing to do with the way I feel about you. It might have started out as a means to free my brother and help my clan, but I fell in love with you along the way.”
“Isn’t that convenient? Of course you’d say that, your plan was to make me fall in love with you.
” He took a step toward her, but again she flinched away.
She didn’t want to listen to anything he had to say.
Just looking at him hurt. The hard square jaw, the wide mouth, the gorgeous blue eyes that had once held the promise of a future set in the darkly handsome face.
“My cousin chose well.” Too well. How easily she’d succumbed to his rugged masculinity.
Flora felt her heart shatter at her feet like a dropped pane of glass.
“God, how could you lie to me like that? How could you be so cruel?”
His face darkened. “I didn’t lie.”
“You didn’t tell me the truth, it’s the same thing.”
“I told you everything that matters. My feelings for you are the truth; the bargain with your cousin does not change that.”
“But the two are inexorably tied together. How could I possibly believe anything you say?”
He gripped her arm, not letting go when she tried to wrench away. “Listen to me,” he said in a low voice. “I needed your cousin’s help. I did what I had to do for my brother and my clan. But that does not change how I feel about you or how you feel about me.”
It changed everything. Lachlan had used her. Manipulated her in the worst way and made her love him. She’d been his pawn and nothing more. Even after he must have realized how much he would hurt her, he hadn’t told her the truth. “You could have told me.”
“I wasn’t sure you would listen.” She heard the censure in his voice, but nothing he could say would change the fact that he’d used her. “Would you have agreed to marry me if I had?” he challenged.
“I guess we’ll never know, since you never gave me the chance to decide.”
“I always intended to tell you the truth.”
“When it was too late for me to change my mind?”
“I couldn’t take the chance that you would.” He gave her a long, penetrating look. “I know how you feel about arranged marriages, and I didn’t want to lose you.”
She laughed, a sharp sound bereft of humor. “How unfortunate that your plan didn’t quite work out.”
“But it did,” he said quietly.
“You’re an even bigger fool than I am if you think I will marry you now.”
She didn’t like his expression. It made her feel he knew something she didn’t. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
“It doesn’t have to be like this,” he said with a note of warning. “We can go through with the ceremony—”
“No! I won’t marry you.”
His mouth tightened. “It’s too late.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. The ceremony hasn’t even begun.”
“The ceremony isn’t necessary.”
Flora felt a prickle of alarm. “What do you mean?”
He took a deep breath. “The contracts have been signed, and last night we agreed to marry.”
She blanched. His strange pronouncement of their intention to marry before her cousin and brother suddenly became clear.
“You tricked me,” she whispered, though why she was surprised, she didn’t know.
Hadn’t he done so from the start? Her next thought cut her to the quick.
Raw emotion tore at her throat, making her voice ragged and tight.
“Is that why you came to me last night?” Not to make love, but to consummate their agreement.
Consummation following their words of intent to marry would be all he needed to make a valid claim of marriage.
“I would have come to you anyway.”
“Yes, but this time there was another purpose.” She could feel the pain erupting in her chest. “Wasn’t there?”
“I hoped it wouldn’t be necessary, but I could take no chances in case Rory tried to put a stop to the wedding. I did it for your protection as much as mine.”
Flora made a sharp sound of disbelief. “My protection? You can’t really expect me to believe that.”
“It’s the truth.”
“No, the truth is that you’ve lied to me since the day we met.
The truth is that you stood before my cousin and brother and proclaimed our intent to marry, and then you sealed your treachery by using my body.
” God, the thought that he could hold her so tenderly, make love to her like that, all the while knowing how he was betraying her—it made her ill.
He seemed to be fighting to control his patience. “I have never used your body. You gave yourself to me willingly, Flora. More than once.” He pulled her a little closer and lowered his voice dangerously. “Bargain or not, I would never let you go. We belong together, don’t you see that?”
Tears burned in her throat as she looked at the man she’d thought she loved.
At the man she’d given her heart. She couldn’t stand it.
It hurt so much. The walls closed in around her.
She felt as if she were being backed into a corner.
Her darkest fear had come true: She was being forced into marriage.
“Don’t do this,” she pleaded.
He looked at her stonily. “It’s done.”
“It doesn’t need to be. Not if you don’t say anything.” They were the only people who knew of this irregular marriage. If neither of them chose to press the claim, no one would ever know. “Please, let me go.”
His eyes softened. “Flora, I …” He hesitated, but only for an instant. “I can’t. I want this marriage, and not just to free my brother. I love you. I know you are hurt, but it will pass—and you will see that this is for the best.”
His face was racked with torment, but she was immune. It was all an act. He was every bit as ruthless as she’d first thought. A coldhearted chief who would do anything to win his prize.
She took a step away from him, seeing him clearly for the first time. His betrayal cut like a knife, eviscerating her love for him as cleanly as if it had never been.
She was killing him. Lachlan felt as though he’d taken a whip and lashed it across her back.
He’d hurt her, splayed her open, and made her bleed.
Even knowing that this was how it had to be did not lessen his feeling of responsibility.
The pain that swam in her eyes and trembled in her voice was infinitely worse than he’d imagined.
He knew how much she hated being forced into anything, but he’d hoped that she would at least try to understand his predicament.
He’d tried to stay calm in the face of her wild accusations, but it was becoming increasingly difficult since she stubbornly refused to listen.
His instincts not to tell her of his bargain with her cousin because of her reaction had proved correct, but knowing that he was right didn’t make this conversation any easier.
“Please,” she begged. The soft plea tugged at his heart. “If you care for me at all, don’t—”