Chapter
Seventeen
Soren
There was something about being with Sawyer that was addicting, and if anyone understood addiction, it was me. I wanted to weigh the pros and cons of giving into the addiction. My fingers itched to text George and schedule a time to meet. I would as soon as Sawyer left, but for now, I indulged and held fast to any moment she would talk to me. I had never experienced these feelings about a woman, especially one I barely knew. Any moment spent with her was as if a delicate butterfly had landed on my finger, and I didn’t want to do anything that would make her fly away. The fragile balance of making sure she felt safe and not overwhelming her with my intense hope to know her was crucial. To be around her. To spend moments of time in her light. I was a plant desperate for warmth from the sun. This fierce desire to make her feel safe was something I couldn’t escape. I had acted impulsively when I hugged her earlier, but the panic that shot through me was staggering. When she said she was stranded with a flat tire, my heart raced full speed ahead until I laid eyes on her beautiful face and knew everything was okay. It scared me how much I wanted to know her. Yes, she was incredibly beautiful, but it was more than that. I could listen to her soft voice for days. Her gentleness pulled at a protective streak in me that wanted to run wild. I wanted to capture her fidgeting hands in mine, but I knew she wasn’t comfortable with me reaching for her. She was adorable in ways she would never understand. The light in her eyes when she’d been able to quickly run her hand over the coat of a calf was like Christmas morning and fireworks on the fourth of July wrapped into one. I memorized that smile because I didn’t want to forget it. We were on our way back to my house, but I didn’t want the afternoon to end. After we parked, I unbuckled and turned toward her.
“What can I do to make you feel safe so that you’ll come to my house on Sunday for dinner with a couple of my friends?” I would do anything.
“You would do that for me?” Her forehead scrunched as if she were confused.
“Sawyer, I’m finding that I would do anything for you.” Her cheeks blushed because my mouth and my brain had run off with themselves where she was concerned. She bit her lip and dipped her head.
“W-Would it be okay if Talia and her husband, Rob, came with me?” Her voice was quiet when she asked.
“Of course, Talia and I go wayyy back.” She laughed, and I added, “It’ll be me and my friends, Lane and Jonah. They helped during the search.”
“Okay. What should I bring?” She bit the inside of her cheek.
“What about that cheesecake Talia was bragging about?”
That tugged another smile out of her. I could tell she was overthinking, so I made a specific request that would ease some of the anxiety for her.
“I think I could do that. Chocolate chip cookie dough or a classic cheesecake?” she asked.
“What type of question is that? If chocolate is involved, it’s always the answer.”
“Then chocolate you shall have.” She tipped her head.
Her shy, playful smile made my chest tight, and I realized in that moment I’d do whatever it took to keep a smile on her face. Talia was right the first time I met her. There was something special about Sawyer, but as certain as I knew this, I also knew she didn’t realize it. Her light was something I never wanted to be without, but I had also felt that way about Abel, and I had ruined that.