Chapter 18 #2
But he doesn’t finish the sentence. He instead grins and says, “You like swimming?”
I want to ask him, What? If it were up to you, what?
Maybe he’d go around punching everyone in the face, like he did to Grayson.
Or maybe…I don’t know. I can’t think of anything else.
Him pretending to be my friend is the only alternative, and we’re already doing that literally right now.
That’s why he asked me to the beach, right?
So folks could see us being friends, per our agreement.
“Um. I like swimming. Especially when the water is warm.” I close my eyes and smile.
“I hate it when it’s weird and barely warm, with extra-cold pockets you swim through like there’s a collection of subterranean air conditioners working in there.
” I glance his way. “What about you? You like swimming?”
He nods. “It’s how I exercise, since high school.
I used to be on the swim team. But now I just go to the Y and do laps a few days a week.
” We turn down the skinny, pine-tree-lined road, heading back toward Cranberry Falls.
I guess he wants to do the more private Crescent Beach today, rather than the one downtown.
Which is fine, of course. Just a surprising choice, given that we’re supposed to be seen as friends.
“So what’s up with that other guy you were seeing, or whatever? ” he asks out of nowhere.
“What guy?”
He laughs. “The one you mentioned the other night, at the festival? You were talking to him, and—”
“Oh right.” He means @tryingsomethingnew. “I think he ghosted me, actually.”
“Jesus. Why?”
I blink at him. “Why not? People ghost each other all the time, don’t they?”
“I know, I know.” He pulls into a parking space and sighs with a kind of hopeless-sounding chuckle coming out at the same time. “It’s just…it’s so weird someone would ghost you, though.”
I snort so loud. “Cut it out, man.”
He grabs the food back from my lap and pulls out his burrito. “I’m serious, Sky.”
I don’t know what to say to that. I think of Teal, wanting me to be matched with this man. Of Nadia, with her knowing, or whatever.
The truth is, at this point…even I can admit to myself that Adam’s behavior might be that of a man who may have a tiny crush on me.
Big deal, though. What Amá Sonya said to me…
that he wants me because he knows that soon he’ll be on my “level”—it cuts to the core of my fear with him, and any other man, to be honest.
Adam’s going to figure out I’m too weird for him.
Spending too much time in the woods, too caught up in my own pastime of solving harmless mysteries.
Too strange a background, having spent eight years basically comatose inside an ancient, hollowed oak tree.
Adam, who is funny and kind, intelligent and beautiful—as soon as he gets his footing back with his work, he’s going to want someone better. That’s what I’ve got to keep in mind.
“I’m going to change really quick. Is that okay?”
He tilts his head. “Uh, sure, but do you want me to—”
I slide my hands under the skirt of my dress and pull my underwear down.
“What the—” Adam says as I shimmy the nude seamless G-string under my feet.
“Don’t freak out. I’m just putting on my swimsuit.”
“Here? In the car?” His voice has gotten squeaky. When I turn to him, I smile when I see that his face is all pink. He’s staring at my legs, like knowing I’m wearing nothing under this dress is doing something to him.
“Nothing’s going to show. Come on. I’m just going to slide it on under my dress, and then pull my dress—”
“Okay, okay. Okay. I’m going to—you know. Give you some privacy. Okay? Okay.”
“You’ve said ‘okay’ like two hundred times in the last thirty seconds.”
“Okay.” He winks at me, still pink-cheeked, and grabs his food and is out the door. He eats with his back toward me, his shoulders looking a bit tense.
I pull on my suit—a one-piece the color of rubies, with a built-in shelf bra that makes my chest look like I’m actually capable of cleavage—and then pull my dress over my head.
I undo my bra next, pulling the straps under my arms and getting the whole thing free, rolled up in the dress, and in the beach bag.
I get out of the car wearing my suit and sandals, my bag on my shoulder. “Ready!”
“You’re decent?” he asks without turning around.
“No. I’m completely naked.” He chokes a bit and I can’t stop my big smile. Why is he so easy to tease? He’s the kind of guy who’s always hooking up with beautiful women. Me getting dressed next to him while showing nothing but my legs and arms shouldn’t affect him like this.
“Sky.” His head drops back. “You’re killing me. You’re killing me over here.”
“It’s a joke. I’m dressed.”
He turns slowly, like he can’t be sure I’m not actually completely nude in the middle of this extremely public parking lot. “Relax. It’s not even a bikini.”
“I don’t know how to relax around you. You’re always—”
“Taking your breath away?” I ask, walking over to him.
He takes one deep breath, like he has to remind himself to do it.
To breathe. He looks me over in a way that gives me goose bumps on the back of my head and down my spine.
His eyes on my hips, my legs, my breasts.
He looks like he wants to do wicked things to me, right now, in this very public parking lot.
Are you seriously that into me? I want to ask. It feels impossible.
But maybe it’s one of those Men will get hard over any round object things. That’s what I’m going to tell myself, anyway.
And it’s a good thing, too, because he realizes what he’s doing and shakes his head and swallows, forcing his eyes to meet my gaze. “Shall we?”
We walk with a couple of feet between us on the trail, in silence for a few minutes, when he says, “I was wondering if you could give me contact information for your sisters. So I can interview them for the piece.”
I’m not sure how I feel about this. I mean, I should’ve known it was coming.
Any kind of article like this always has interviews with the subject’s inner circle.
But I wince when I imagine Teal turning it around on him, to find out his intentions with me or whatever.
I’ll have to talk to her beforehand and make sure she knows that would be overstepping.
“Sure. Let me let them know first, and then I can give you their info.” I glance at him.
“You…haven’t asked me anything about…you know.
My experience. Since we were last here…”
“And I was an enormous ass to you. I remember.” He nods. “Whenever you’re comfortable. I can ask a few more questions. I promise I’ll be…” He takes in a brief but shuddering breath. “I’ll be nice.”
“Thank you,” I say as I duck under a low evergreen branch.
Adam shakes his head. “Thanking me for being nice.” He chuckles. “Like I said, Sky. You deserve so much better.”