Olivia
Ipull into the school pickup line and ease to a stop behind a row of minivans and SUVs.
The usual afternoon chaos unfolds around me with kids spilling out of the building in waves, but today, everything feels heavier.
After what happened with Caleb, my depression has gotten worse, but I have to stay strong.
Ethan needs to see his mom holding it together, not falling apart over a man who turned out to be just another lie.
The line creeps forward slowly. I glance in the rearview mirror and adjust my hair, smoothing it down.
A few days have passed since I slammed the door on Caleb, but the ache in my chest hasn't eased, though it's not as bad as what Derek put me through.
Still, every quiet moment brings it back.
The look on his face of shame and guilt was only more proof to my battered heart that he knew what he was doing and he never cared one bit.
Ethan bursts through the doors with his backpack bouncing on his shoulders. He scans the cars until he spots mine and jogs over, his face lighting up when he makes eye contact. I unlock the door and he climbs in, tossing his bag to the floor.
"Hi, Mom," he says, buckling his seatbelt.
"Hey, buddy. How was school?" I pull out of the line and head toward home, trying to keep cheer in my tone. He doesn't need to see me breaking down crying again. He already saw that once a few days ago.
"Good. We had a substitute in math and she let us play games at the end." He kicks his feet against the seat in front of him, then stops when I give him the look. "Sorry."
I reach back and squeeze his knee for a second. "Sounds fun. You finish that worksheet I signed?"
"Yeah." He digs through his backpack and pulls it out, waving the paper at me. "All done."
I ask him about recess and his friends, nodding along as he chatters.
The words flow out of me automatically, the sunny front I always put up.
Inside, though, my stomach twists. I've replayed that moment in Derek's office too many times and it makes my skin crawl even now.
How could he slither into my life just to gather information to feed back to the man trying to destroy me, all the while knowing what it'd do to me?
It wasn't like it was a secret between us.
As we turn onto our street, Ethan goes quiet for a minute. Then he asks the question I've been dreading for days.
"Mom, why hasn't Caleb come over lately? I miss him fixing the stuff in the yard and playing soccer with me." I can't even check the mirror to see his expression. It's heartbreaking and maybe the exact reason I should've listened to my monster of an ex.
Imagine that—my actually agreeing with Derek on something.
But Ethan got attached to Caleb the way I did, and now what am I supposed to tell him?
It's not fair of him to have done this to me, but I'm absolutely furious with him for dragging Ethan through this.
And to think I thought he was a good man.
"He has been busy, buddy," I say, forcing a smile so Ethan doesn't notice the way my eyes are welling up. "Grown-ups get busy sometimes." I blink back the tears and round the corner toward home.
"But he was fun. He showed me how to trap the ball better." Ethan's voice carries that little edge of disappointment that tugs at my heart. He shifts in his seat and looks out the window toward Caleb's house as we pass it. "Do you think he'll come back?"
I swallow the lump rising in my throat and turn into our driveway.
The sight of his truck parked next door sends a fresh wave of confusion through me, though I don't see him at all.
Part of me misses the way he listened, the solid feel of his shoulder under my head.
The rest of me burns with anger at how easily he played the part.
"I don't know, Ethan. Sometimes, people aren't who we think they are." I park and cut the engine, turning to face him fully. My hand reaches out to brush his hair back from his forehead. "But we have each other, right? That's what matters."
He nods, though his eyes still look a little sad. "Yeah," he grumbles, opening his door.
We head inside, and I help him pack his bag for the overnight with Derek.
Then I fold his clothes neatly, adding his favorite pajamas and the book he's reading.
My hands move on autopilot while my mind races.
Derek's been pushing harder lately, and every time Ethan goes over there, I wonder what stories he hears about me.
Only this time, there's no comforting arms to hold me when I feel upset or anxious.
Ethan runs into the room, flopping on the bed dramatically, and he's still sulking. I want to cheer him up so I try to focus on some positives for him.
"You excited to see Dad?" I ask, zipping the bag closed.
"Kind of. He said we might get pizza." Ethan shrugs, but there is a spark in his eyes that reminds me he's just a kid caught in the middle.
I pull him into a hug, holding him close for a moment. His small arms wrap around my waist and I breathe him in. He's only going to be little for so long, and when he's grown up, I’m going to miss this. "Be good, okay? And call me if you need anything."
"I will."
The doorbell rings sooner than I want. I open it to find Derek standing there, glowering like normal. He doesn't even look at me directly at first, just glances past me to Ethan.
"Ready, Champ?"
Ethan grabs his bag and gives me one more quick hug before heading out. Derek hands me an envelope, though his expression quickly turns more sour as soon as Ethan can't see his face. I take it and my stomach knots up.
"This is for you," he says flatly. "We have a court date in July, Olivia. I thought you should know, I'm contesting full custody."
I feel like I've just been punched in the gut.
I stand there frozen, feeling the blood drain from my face as I crumple the envelope without even opening it to read the paperwork.
I knew this was going to happen sooner or later, but it all makes sense now.
He's been trying to set a case against me for so long, all so he could sue for custody and make me look bad.
"You really think this is best for Ethan?" I feel small and powerless against him. He's a lawyer. He does this for a living. I'm just a single mom who's had to fight for everything for the past three years.
Derek's mouth twists into a smirk. "I know what's best. See you in court, Olivia."
He walks away, and I don't try to stop him and argue.
I never want Ethan to hear that sort of stuff again.
He heard enough of it when I found out Derek was cheating both times.
He's a happy, smart kid, and it wouldn't take much for his smarts to figure out what's going on and turn his happiness into bitterness.
When they're gone, I turn back into the house and see Caleb standing by the fence painting it.
The new boards have been in place a while, and I wondered when he was going to paint, though I never asked.
Now I'm wondering why he even repaired it.
He mentioned wanting to get a dog, but I've not seen hide nor hair of a dog yet.
It was just another ploy to weasel into my life so he could snoop around.
He looks up and our eyes meet for a second, but I quickly turn away, glowering as I walk inside the house and shut the door. My chest feels like I just had a bomb go off in my lap. Between Derek's pressuring and Caleb's betrayal, I feel defeated.
For all my fighting and struggling to be a good mother, it feels like the universe is out to get me. I may lose custody of my son for no reason other than my ex-husband is an asshole who can't stand being told what to do. And all of it is out of my control.
I walk to the kitchen table and drop the crinkled letter there, cringing over the memory of Caleb crouched down putting this thing together.
If I were made of money, I'd burn it. But I'm not.
So I have to sit and burn with anger every time I eat at this table with Ethan and he reminds me we that have an empty chair.
What am I going to do come July when we meet at the courthouse and I have to explain to a judge why Derek is a lying sack of shit and I've done nothing but make good choices for my son?
And who am I going to turn to for comfort now?