Chapter Twenty-One #2
“Humpf,” Edward grumbled. “I would worry a good sight less if I knew there was a bride.”
“Her family is here, all but her father, which only serves to prove further that she is here as he will be waiting with her to walk her down the aisle.”
Edward frowned, but he couldn’t find any fault in his friend’s logic. “I somehow still do not feel better. Even if she is there, that does not mean she wishes to be. Perhaps her parents forced her. Or she does not wish to be ruined or fuel the gossip mill more than she already does.”
“She has never seemed to care about the gossips before, I doubt she does now. If she were to cry off, it would likely have more to do with her guilt than anything.”
“Her guilt? Over what?” Edward frowned and then rolled his eyes with a frustrated breath. “Bloody hell, Anthony, you don’t still believe she murdered her husbands, do you?”
Anthony shrugged, his hands upraised. “I cannot say if she did or not. I will say, having gotten to know the lady, that if she did hasten their ends, they likely deserved it. However, she could, and should, in my opinion as your oldest friend, feel some bit of guilt over not divulging all her secrets prior to mere hours before your nuptials.”
Edward snorted. “If you are expecting any woman, especially your future wife, to divulge all her secrets you are going to die a very disappointed man.”
Anthony wasn’t wed yet. But he would be some day. It would be wise to manage his expectations now. “A woman is entitled to her secrets, Goodwin. Pity the man who tries to pry them out.”
Anthony scowled. “Yes, well, be that as it may, there are some secrets that should be shared.”
“Agreed,” Edward nodded.
“She should have told you sooner.”
Edward shrugged at that. “Perhaps.”
“I am only looking out for you, my friend. Playing the role of advocatus diaboli, if you will. What does it say for the type of relationship you have if she could not bring herself to do so?”
“Likely nothing aside from being a woman who has been judged too harshly by too many for far too long.” Edward planted his hands on his hips. “I have been over this a thousand times since last night.”
“Yes. I know. As I have been with you through every moment. If you are still this troubled, perhaps it would be best to call off the wedding. I have never seen you in such a state. This surely cannot be healthy. And if the bride already has a habit of burying her grooms, at least one that we know of from a failed heart, the last thing you should be doing is helping the curse along.”
That stopped Edward in his tracks. “I have no intention of crying off, despite what my current demeanor might insinuate. I am a man of honor. I would never ruin what little reputation Selena has left by leaving her at the altar.”
Not to mention how much he would be hurt by such an action. He had fought too hard to win her. He would not give her up now. For any reason. If he lost her…he would never recover.
“Then what is all this?” Anthony said, nodding his head at Edward’s obviously agitated state.
He let out a long sigh. “I suppose I worry if she will have me at all. While it wasn’t entirely my fault that I was not given time to react to her news before being chased from the house, Selena still has no assurances from me.
No declarations. The last she saw of me, I was still too much in shock.
And by the time I had recovered enough to give her the response she likely hoped for and deserved, I was clinging to the trellis outside her window for my dear life. ”
Anthony chuckled and then held up a placating hand at Edward’s glare.
“My apologies, my friend. I know this is not a matter for amusement, but I simply cannot get the image of you clutching at the wall like an insect in the dead of night from my mind.”
Edward pursed his lips and narrowed his eyes at his friend, though frankly had their positions been reversed he would have been howling with laughter. “I’m sure it is very amusing.”
“It is,” Anthony said, wiping the mirth from his eyes. “Truly.”
“Glad to be of service,” Edward said wryly.
“Oh, be at ease.” Anthony clapped a hand on his shoulder. “I am certain your lady awaits her moment right outside that door.”
Edward nodded though he still felt far from confident.
Selena had been very upset, rightly so. And after such a revelation—one which she had only withheld because of her fears that he would reject her—to have him not immediately reassure her of his love and commitment might have devastated her.
Disappointed her, certainly. And possibly been enough to discourage her from meeting him in front of that clergyman today.
Yes, her family sat opposite his in the pews waiting for the ceremony to start. But that didn’t mean she hadn’t taken the opportunity to run once they were out of sight. She had certainly run from him before.
“It is time,” Anthony said, holding open the door into the main sanctuary.
He took a deep breath and shook his arms out, then straightened his jacket and cravat and followed his friend to his place in front of the vicar. Anthony nodded at him once more and left him to take his seat.
His mother gave him a surprisingly gracious smile, considering her initial objections to this union.
His father checked his pocket watch. His brothers smiled at him like buffoons.
And his sisters, busily fanning themselves and nudging their husbands now and then, smiled at him, smugly delighted he would be joining the ranks of the happily wed momentarily.
At least he hoped he so.
“Are we ready?” Mr. Burgess, the vicar, asked.
Edward gave him a sharp nod and turned to face the aisle though custom typically indicated one should face forward awaiting one’s bride. He wanted to see Selena for himself the moment she walked through that door. If she walked through it.
And if she did, he would marry her just as fast as he possibly could. Yes, they still had a few issues to work out. And they would do so. But first, he would make her his.
The vicar nodded and two attendants opened the outer doors, letting in the sunlight.