Episode 69
Episode 69
Rallying the Troops
JACK
I put TJ into his toddler bed. He instantly curled on his side as I covered him with the blanket, tucked him in, then I leaned down and kissed the side of his head. “I love you,” I whispered, my soul breaking into a million pieces. This boy had no idea how much he’d lost in his young life. Losing his father before he was even born, and now his mother at two and a half? It was aberrant and gutted me wide open.
“He asleep?” I heard whispered from behind me.
I turned to find Summer, the hallway light a golden halo around her beautiful form, making her look like a true goddess.
“Yeah.” I ran my hand over his hair once more, then clicked on the nightlight and shut the door.
Summer leaned against the opposite wall. “How are you doing?”
I shook my head. “I’ve never felt so lost and helpless,” I admitted.
Summer opened her arms, and I went straight into them, tucking my face against her neck and holding her tight. “I can’t believe this happened. We just talked to her. She was coming to our wedding next week. I…” My voice caught in my throat.
“It’s absolutely messed up, but I’m here. For you, for TJ, for whatever you need.” She ran her hands up and down my head and back in soothing strokes that relaxed me further against her.
“I’m so tired but I want to be ready when Erik and Savannah get here,” I sighed.
“The Johansen’s said they are still several hours out. Something about flight delays at Heathrow. You need rest. If not for you, then for TJ. That little boy is going to need you when he wakes and finds his mother not h-here.” Her voice cracked and I watched as she cleared her throat, stiffened her shoulders, and stood taller, becoming strong and capable right before my eyes.
I cupped her cheeks, dipped my head and kissed her soft lips. “Thank you,” I whispered against them then gave her another peck. “Thank you for being here. For letting me lean on you. I don’t know what I would have done without you by my side through this,” I croaked, my voice sounding as though my throat had been put through a cheese grater.
Summer pressed her body flat against mine, wrapped her arms around my shoulders and held on. “Whatever you need, I’m here to give it to you. Lean on me. Anytime… every time ,” she murmured, and I clung to every breath that left her lips. “That’s what couples do. What families do, Jack. And you and me, and TJ, we’re about to become a family.”
I pulled back and looked deeply into her soulful eyes. They were filled with concern and such understanding I was stunned. Genuinely astonished. She didn’t need to deal with any of this. We weren’t married yet. There was nothing but a contract that I could have voided with one call. That was the entire reason there is a month before the couples are required to get married. In case one or both of them just don’t believe it’s a good fit. I certainly wanted to marry Summer. More than anything I’d wanted in a long, long time.
I didn’t care about her family’s spiritual beliefs or our differences. I cared about her. Not only did we have sexual chemistry in spades, but I liked being around her. She was unlike anyone I’d ever met. She was kind, beautiful, sassy as the day is long, free spirited, and smiled more than she ever frowned. The freedom to be open and honest, to let go and just be me around her and her family, had been an eye-opening experience. One I’d cherish and learn from moving forward. But signing up to marry a man with no children for a period of three years is entirely different than marrying a man who’s suddenly in charge of raising a child.
“Summer, I couldn’t ask you to do that. Losing Ellen changes everything.” I slumped against the opposite wall. “You should run far away from all of this. You don’t need the money. I can help you with your business as a mentor regardless of whether or not we get married. You signed on the dotted line to become my wife, not a mother to an orphaned child.” I shook my head and rubbed at the back of my neck, the tension increasing as I processed the future.
“Jack, nothing has changed outside of growing our little family from two to three. I love kids. I wouldn’t mind having a whole bunch of them. I’m already half in love with TJ after a single night. And you and I were heading somewhere beautiful in our relationship. That doesn’t have to change because of TJ.”
“But it does. He needs a real family. Parents that put him above themselves. I didn’t have that as a kid, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let him grow up without feeling loved and protected.”
She raked her fingers through her hair then shrugged. “I’m not letting you go. Either of you. I want it all. You and TJ.”
I bent in half as her words hit my stomach like a sucker punch to the gut. “You can’t mean that. You’ve had all of five seconds to truly understand the severity of this situation. I live for TJ now.”
“So that means you have no room in your heart or your life for me?” she breathed, her eyes filling with tears.
I shook my head. “No. I was already falling for you. Every day we’re together feels like the best day of my life…until today.”
She crossed the hallway and took my hands. “We can still have each other and give TJ the best life.”
I let out a long breath. “I don’t know what to do or what to think.”
“First and foremost, you don’t have to decide anything tonight. You’ve been through hell. You need rest.” She led me to the guest room I used at Ellen’s.
And that’s when the nightmare became real. Ellen.
“She’s gone,” I sobbed as we entered the room and I braced myself at the end of the bed, hunched over as the pain tore through my entire body.
Summer was right there, wrapping her body around mine the best she could. She didn’t speak, she didn’t have to. All I needed was her to be there, to not let me fall into a black puddle of my own misery. But it was hard, so hard not to break in half under the weight of responsibility and overwhelming grief.
I was a father.
And I had no fucking idea what to do. My body convulsed as the tears fell to the coverlet. Summer turned me around and gestured for me to sit. Once I was stable, she crouched and removed my shoes and socks one at a time, then my shirt. Next, she grabbed my hands, and I followed her lead, standing up while she undid my pants and slipped them off me until I was in my boxer briefs and nothing else. Then she led me to one side of the bed where she pulled the covers back.
“Get in, honey,” she encouraged.
My mind was so fried I did exactly as she said. My eyelids became heavier with each passing second as I watched her remove everything she was wearing but her panties. Then she slipped my t-shirt over her head, and it fell to just past her curvy ass. She left the door wide open, the hall light on, probably for TJ, in case he woke up and needed us, and flicked off the room’s lights. I felt her crawl into bed, wiggle until she was spooned up behind me, and tucked her face against the back of my neck.
“We’re going to make it through this, Jack. It will take time, but I’ve got you. Goodnight.” She kissed the back of my neck, and I grabbed her hand that was near my stomach, pulled it up to my mouth, kissed her fingers and held it next to my heart.
* * * *
The smell of coffee and the sound of someone singing a lullaby woke me from a deep sleep. Within seconds, all that had happened the day before came rushing back in a deluge of horrible images.
Hearing Ellen was in a coma.
Racing to the hospital and holding TJ.
Seeing Ellen in that hospital bed.
Having to say goodbye to someone I loved.
I jumped out of bed and raced the ten steps down the hall to TJ’s room. It was empty. Overwhelming panic unlike anything I’d ever felt before slammed into my chest like an oncoming bullet train. Then I heard the singing again. I dashed down the hall, following the sound, my heart beating double-time as I stopped at the entrance to the kitchen. There was Summer, TJ on her hip, sucking milk from a sippy cup while she scrambled some eggs. Already on the counter were cut-up strawberries and banana chunks, all perfectly sized for a child.
With my heart in a vise, I braced my hand on the counter and watched them.
Summer was a natural, singing and rocking TJ, all while cooking breakfast as if she’d done this every day of her life. She snuffled against TJ’s neck until the boy squealed with laughter and patted her cheek with his free hand.
“TJ in his PJs,” she sang and snuffled against him again to be rewarded with another squeal.
I cleared my throat, and her gaze lifted to mine and she smiled wide. My heart stopped for a full beat as I took in the most beautiful sight. Summer smiling, TJ turning to look at me and grinning with those adorable chubby cheeks. If I hadn’t known better, the two looked like mother and son. His blue eyes matched hers almost perfectly. The smiles both cheesy and big along with rosy cheeks. Their skin tone was even a similar summery bronze much like my own.
“Dada Yak!” TJ called out and made a grabby hand.
I went over to the boy and hefted him into my arms, hugging him close. “Eeeeegggg,” he dragged out the word egg in English and pointed at the pan.
Summer clapped. “Good boy!”
“Ga boy!” he parroted back to her.
“Good boy! Yay! TJ! You are so smart. Look at you learning English already!” She grabbed his hand, gave it a big kiss and then went back to the eggs. “Coffee’s ready, do you mind pouring us a cup? I’m almost finished with his breakfast,” she said.
“How’s my boy this morning?” I asked TJ and kissed the top of his head.
He patted my face and said, “Dada Yak, eeeeggggg!”
I chuckled as I got down two cups.
“Soup’s on!” Summer called out and prepared the scrambled eggs and fruit onto a tri-sectioned kid plate that had animals on it.
I brought Troy Jack to his chair and buckled him in then pushed him close to the table the way I had done many times before when sharing meals with Ellen and TJ.
Summer put the plate in front of TJ, and he immediately went for a berry.
“Oh, he needs his silverware. Ellen was teaching him how to eat with utensils.”
“Cool!” Summer snapped her fingers and then went to the appropriate utensil drawer as if she’d lived here forever and cooked in this kitchen all the time. She pulled out a toddler fork and passed it to me.
I gave it to TJ, and he instantly poked an egg bite on the tines and shoveled it into his mouth.
While he was busy eating, I went back over to the coffee and finished making us cups. “You should have woken me when he got up.”
She shrugged nonchalantly. “I heard his little feet hit the wood floor and knew he was up. You were sleeping so soundly, and you really needed it. Besides, I enjoyed having some quiet time with him. He’s super affectionate and cute as a button when he’s yammering away in Norwegian.”
I smiled and went up behind her, glancing at TJ to make sure he had all that he needed. He was busy shoveling food into his mouth. The boy had a healthy appetite just like his Dad had. I wrapped my arms around Summer as she poured more egg mixture into the pan.
“Thank you for being here.” I kissed the side of her neck and squeezed her around the waist.
“Jack, there isn’t anywhere I’d rather be. TJ needs us. You most of all, but maybe me too.” She turned her head and stared into my eyes. “Don’t count me out just yet. I’m stronger than you think.”
“Baby, you are the strongest person I’ve ever met. The way you handled me yesterday, took charge of everything, helped me with TJ, put me to bed, taking on the morning.”
“And I’ll do it again and again for the people I care about. Jack, I liked what we started back in California. I don’t want to change any of it.”
“But we have to because I have a new responsibility. One I can’t in good conscience expect you to tackle too.”
“You don’t get to decide what I want for me. I’m telling you here and now,”—she held up the spatula as though it were her liberty torch—“I am all in. Wife, business mentee, and now stepmother.”
I shook my head and sighed. “It’s too soon for you to decide something like that. Having TJ changes everything. As I mentioned before, I live for him now, not me.”
“As you should. That’s what a good parent does. That’s what my parents taught me. It won’t be an easy transition, but we’ve got each other to lean on. Oh, and they’ll be here by dinner.”
I jerked my head back. “Who?”
“My family.” She said this as if it wasn’t a big deal and pushed the eggs around until they were fluffy yellow clouds.
“Your family is coming here? To Oslo? To Norway?”
She looked at me and frowned. “Of course they are.”
“Of course? What? Why?” I gasped.
Summer looked at me as though I had the IQ of a gnat before she cocked her head. “Because there was a death in the family, Jack. TJ lost his mom. You lost your sister. We need family around to get through the days ahead as we figure all of this out.”
We need family around .
I was genuinely shocked dumb. I didn’t know what to say other than to nod.
Summer plated the eggs but kept talking. “I know you’re not used to having a tight-knit family, honey, but you’re marrying into one. We take care of one another during the good times and the bad. This one is super bad. The troops have been rallied and will be here by dinner. Mom already has presents for her new grandson. Her words not mine. If you don’t like her calling herself grandma, you’ll want to give me the heads up now, and I’ll talk to her privately. And Autumn says she’s bringing some protective crystals for TJ’s room. We’ll have to put them up high enough he can’t reach them. I’ll make sure Dad takes care of that.” She rattled on as I heard the toaster go off.
“Your mother, father, and sister will be here by dinner?” I said out loud, still stupefied by this news.
She gestured to the table where she’d put our plates, filled with scrambled eggs and toast. “Yeah, I just said that. Weren’t you listening?”
I sat down and watched as she tore off a piece of buttered toast and handed it to TJ. He immediately grabbed it and started gnawing on it.
“Bet that feels good on those teefers, huh buddy,” she cooed.
TJ and Summer went back and forth sharing bits and pieces of language that neither of them knew and having a blast doing it.
I spaced out for a while, thinking days ahead about what had to be done for Ellen and TJ. My plate was empty as Summer grabbed it and took it to the sink. I didn’t even remember eating anything.
Summer clapped her hands, unlatched the buckle on TJ’s seat, and lifted him onto her hip. “Okay, buddy, bath time!”
Fuck. Bath time. TJ probably hadn’t had one since the night before we talked with him and Ellen on the phone. I should have thought of that. His welfare should have been the number one thing on my mind. I didn’t even wake when he got up this morning. Nor was I the one that made him breakfast or realized he needed to be cleaned and dressed for the day ahead. I was already a shitty father and needed to seriously catch up.
Summer was incredibly good at this parenting business. Maybe she really did want to tackle this new world of being parents with me. I shook my head. No, she was just being kind. The woman was naturally giving and nurturing to everyone. At the very least, I could learn a few things from her while we put Ellen to rest.
The doorbell sounded, and I walked over to the door, not even checking the peephole before opening it wide.
Erik and Savannah stood looking haggard and brokenhearted.
“Brother,” Erik breathed and pulled me into his arms.
“I’m so glad you’re here, man.” I held on tight. “We lost her. We lost Ellen.” I croaked and the two of us stood in the entryway to Ellen’s home and wept.