3
Elvira
Jess: How was dinner?
Jess: Did he pop the question?
Jess: Damn. Your professor is getting skewered online for that thing with the student. [video attached]
Jess: Serves him right!
Me: He asked me to tell you to send him a letter of recommendation.
MY PHONE RANG. IT was Jess. Shit. I shouldn't have responded.
I was in the pub for hours, drowning my sorrows in watered-down cocktails that were barely giving me the alcohol hit I needed.
After emptying a full bladder in a toilet filled with college students having fun on a Friday night, I whipped my phone out of my pocket.
I had nine missed calls from Wyatt. Twelve from Billie and one from Jess.
On top of that, Wyatt had sent endless versions of I'm sorry, and Billie had sent a single I'm sorry.
Fuck off. They can both fuck off all the way to Jupiter.
I had run out of his place with nothing but the phone in my pocket and the keys in my hands. Then I drove around the campus for hours in bouts of anger, sadness, and finally emptiness. When I stopped, it was evening, and I had nowhere to go.
Like a foolish, lovesick woman, I had moved in with Wyatt, thinking we had more than just fleeting emotions between us.
That was not true clearly. I could go to the pawnshop, but that meant a two-hour drive into the city, and I was sick of driving.
And besides, my sister was out of town for the weekend.
Jess would only ask questions, and I was not sure I wanted to talk to anyone.
The other place I used to slum at was my former roommate's, Billie.
That was unequivocally out. So I went to the Dutch Raven pub and ordered cocktails on the tab, and went to the table at the back of the pub.
Ronnie, the bartender, must have realized how miserable I was, and by the third cocktail, he was lowering the alcohol content by a lot.
But I didn't care. I just wanted to be alone and numb.
Jess called again. On the fourth ring, I answered.
"Am I disturbing?" Jess's voice is so low, I almost don't hear her amidst the loud noise of the crowded bar.
"He was fucking Billie."
"What!"
"I saw him with Billie. When I got home. He was in bed with Billie." Saying it out loud felt like a weight off my chest. But a lump remained in my throat.
“Oh, Elle. How are you?”
"Not fine." I wanted to cry, to let out the pain, but no tears came.
"Oh god. How could he? That bastard! And Billie!" She muttered a few more expletives that were surprising to hear coming from a person as cultured as Jess. It was oddly comforting. "Where are you?"
"The Dutch Raven."
"I'll come get you."
"It's fine. I booked a hotel room." It was a lie, but I didn't want to inconvenience her. Jess might be fine with me staying over, but her husband, however, might not appreciate an impromptu guest on a Friday evening.
"Still. Can you even get out of there safely? You sound drunk."
"There are these things called ride-sharing services. It's a new technology, I don't know if you've heard of it."
"Yeah, yeah. Call me when you get to your hotel room."
"Of course."
I ended the call and chugged down the rest of my drink.
Now that the alcoholic fog was wearing off, I realized that I had to make serious plans for where to go.
I could do the hotel thing, but I was sure my wallet was in my purse, which I left at Wyatt's place.
Fuck. I staggered out of my seat and wandered out of the bar.
It was close to midnight, but the campus streets were busy.
I stumbled and leaned against the walls of the pub.
My vision was hazy. I had underestimated the alcoholic content of those cocktails, and it was all threatening to come out.
My body doubled over in preparation for a hurl of vomit, but nothing came out.
I was still feeling nauseous, and taking deep breaths didn't seem to be working.
"Hey!" someone called out. "Are you okay?" I heard a whistle and looked up. Two men who looked like sophomores were sauntering over to me. Ugh. Frat boys. "You look pretty wasted," one said in a bemused voice.
"I'm fine, thanks." I waved them away weakly. Instead of taking it as the dismissal it was, they took it as an opening.
"Are you sure?" I heard one of them say. They were coming closer. I felt a hand on my back. "You don't look fine."
"Hey!" a third voice called out. "Get away from her!"
"Who the fuck are you?" Frat boy one said.
"Her boyfriend."
I heard a snicker, but then a few moments later,thehand disappeared, and another, much gentler one went around my waist, helping me up. I could recognize that cologne anywhere. It reminded me of oak and morning dew.
"Levi?" My gaze went to his face. It was him, alright. He wasn't wearing his glasses, making his gray eyes even more devastatingly mesmerizing under street lights.
"I told you to wait for me inside," he said.
Huh. "Sorry," I muttered, not sure what I was going along with. I just wanted to be out of here.
"See?" he said to the frat bros. "She's fine, fellas. Thanks for your concern." To me, he whispered into my ear softly, "You looked like you were going somewhere?" A thrill ran down my spine that had nothing to do with the chilly weather.
"The parking lot. I left my car there."
Levi helped me towards the parking lot. My heavy legs and nausea made me stagger, but walking helped to clear my head somewhat.
"You shouldn't leave a beautiful woman like that alone," Frat boy two shouted.
"Ignore them," I said when I felt Levi turn. "What are you doing here?"
"Am I not allowed to go to a pub?"
I snorted. "You don't fraternize with the plebs."
"What are you doing here? Where's Wyatt? Should I call him?"
"No!"
Levi jerked back, surprised by my vehement refusal.
"I mean," I said in a lower voice, "please don't call him. We, uh, fought."
"At dinner?"
"We didn't even make it to dinner."
"I should have realized," he said, waving at my clothes. I was still wearing the same outfit I had on during the day. "That bad, huh?" he added.
I nodded. I didn't know how to tell him I had found Wyatt in bed with my friend. Wyatt was his friend, too. The whole thing was a mess.
We arrived at the parking lot where my battered yellow Mini Cooper was sitting next to his much more impressive Maybach SL.
If I didn't know better, I would have thought he had looked for my car and parked next to it, considering the parking lot was nearly empty.
"I didn't park next to yours deliberately.
It wasn't as deserted as it is now," he said almost self-consciously.
And when I turned to look at him, his cheeks had some color.
Odd. The most confident man I knew was acting shy.
"I didn't say anything."
We were now standing between our cars when I noticed that his hand was still around my waist. He was still holding me like I were a precious egg and he were a giant who was afraid of crushing me.
I wanted to stay in his light embrace for a moment longer, but I wasn't feeling a little better now.
I twisted myself out of his hold and dug into my pocket for my keys.
"What are you doing?"
“Getting into my car.” My plan was, hopefully, to find a place to take me in without a credit card on file, and failing that, to sleep in the car.
"Not when you can hardly walk." He snatched my keys.
"Hey!"
"You're too drunk to drive. Get into my car and I'll take you home."
I shook my head.
"Not Wyatt's place. Got it. Where can I take you? Billie's?"
"No! Not hers either."
Levi's brow furrowed. "Is something wrong?"
"I told you we had a fight, and that's all there is.
Now give me the keys." I swung for them, but he thrust them out of my reach, taking advantage of his height and making me jump for them.
My efforts were futile, and since I was drunk, my jumps were unsteady.
"Fuck you," I said when I realized he was toying with me.
He chuckled. "You can't drive yourself. Tell me where you want to go and I will take you there."
I thrust my hands into my pockets and leaned against my car.
I couldn't exactly tell him I had no place to go.
And as my drunkenness haze cleared, my harebrained scheme of staying at a hotel without a credit card on file seemed ridiculous.
Sleeping in my car was my only option. Or cram at Jess's place, who I'm sure was now asleep.
If Todd didn't like my coming in unannounced, he would hate being bothered in the middle of the night.
"You have no place to go, do you?" Levi folded his arms. "What happened between you two?"
"A fight. Like I told you."
His eyes narrowed. "It had something to do with Billie." He stated it more as a fact than a question.
"Do you know something that I don't?"
"I—I. It's probably nothing, but…" he shook his head. "Never mind."
"But what! That's my friend and boyfriend you're talking about. What do you know?"
He sighed. Turning his gaze away from mine, he said, "I saw them in the Hamptons together last summer."
"Last summer?" So, this thing had been going on for that long. What a fucking dumbass I was.
"I didn't think anything of it. When I spoke to them, they said they had just met, but they looked guilty. It could have been nothing."
"Well, it's not nothing because they were fucking each other like rabbits when I saw them."
Levi's face fell. His features softened. "Elvira." His voice was a choked whisper. "I'm sorry."
He took me in his arms for a hug. I was too weak to resist. His body was so warm and his coat jacket so inviting that tears fell.
I sobbed like a child, and he brushed my back, comforting in a way I didn't know I needed.
He let me cry until I felt like I had no more tears left.
When I felt I could confidently gaze at him without tears in my eyes, I did, and he had the same sympathy still in his eyes.
"You're staying with me tonight."