Chapter 4
ALEX
Alex felt foolish for having worried about his encounter with Kaitlyn.
It felt as though no time had passed at all.
The awkward first words were behind them, and the conversation was flowing freely.
It felt just like being back in high school.
Kaitlyn was just as pretty now as she’d been then, but more mature, of course.
Alex liked that. In her pretty peach-colored dress that complemented her red curls, she exuded a kind of confidence, one he found attractive, and he could only admire her for the way she’d pursued her artistic dreams.
“I didn’t tell you it was me buying the pieces. I got someone else to do it. But I chose them. It was a hard choice. Everything you make… it’s beautiful,” he said.
Kaitlyn blushed. “You should’ve said something. I’d have been pleased to hear from you.”
A wave of guilt came over Alex as he thought of the unanswered letters and postcards. He could feel the blush rising in his cheeks. “I’m sorry. I should’ve written to you. Or called you. I could make excuses, but…” he began, stumbling over his words.
There was no excuse. He simply hadn’t replied.
As for the reason, he wasn’t entirely sure.
Harvard had been a difficult time for him.
He’d suffered from impostor syndrome, and that had made him work far harder than he needed to.
Setting up his first business, studying for his degree — it had taken its toll, and it was his relationships, his friendships that had suffered.
“You won’t get anywhere without making sacrifices” was something one of his professors used to say.
Alex had taken it to heart. He’d worked harder, longer, and with more sacrifices than anyone. The result: he’d been a millionaire by twenty-one and made his first billion at twenty-five. But as for finding happiness…
“It doesn’t matter. We went our separate ways. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. It just happened that way,” Kaitlyn replied.
Alex was grateful to her. She had every right to be angry with him. He’d often thought about what might’ve been. Sean and Rachel were the example of that. That could’ve been him and Kaitlyn.
It still could be.
It was a foolish thought, of course. He really knew nothing about her anymore. For all he knew, Kaitlyn might well have someone already, someone back in San Francisco, another artist. San Francisco was full of people like that.
“I know, but you used to send me things, and I meant to reply, but then something else happened. It wasn’t easy. I was trying to prove myself, and…” he began, but Kaitlyn interrupted him.
“I thought you weren’t making excuses,” she said.
Alex blushed. “I’m sorry. I wish I could change things. But here we are. Perhaps we can start over.”
He hoped he didn’t sound desperate. He wasn’t really sure what he was asking — another chance at romance?
It was too soon for that, though three glasses of champagne and the table wine were making it easier to envisage.
But seeing Kaitlyn again was a reminder to Alex that there’d never been anyone else.
He’d tried to feel the same way about other women, but the spark had never been there. It was strange.
“How long are you back in town for?” she asked, as though not wanting to make any definite commitment.
“Just a week. Usually, my mom and I meet in Florida. That’s why I don’t get back here very often. Ever, in fact,” he replied.
The empty plates from the first course had been cleared away, and now the main course arrived — a saddle of lamb, with feta and pomegranates and couscous to accompany it.
“You got your meat,” Kaitlyn said, glancing toward where Rachel was being presented with a stuffed eggplant.
Alex smiled. Kaitlyn still had that same sense of humor as always. It was observational and witty. He’d always been attracted to her sharpness. Whatever she’d turned her hand to, she’d succeeded, and Alex knew she’d be successful in the future, too, wherever life led her.
“Thank goodness. I’d have had to stop at the drive-thru on the way home if not.”
Kaitlyn made a face. “You were always obsessed with the drive-thru. I hope you’re eating better now. I suppose you’ll tell me you’re too busy to eat,” she said as she sliced into her lamb.
Alex didn’t like to admit she was right.
The kitchen in his apartment had cost close to a hundred thousand dollars to fit, but Alex couldn’t remember the last time he’d done anything more than make coffee in it and warm some croissants from the nearest bakery.
If it wasn’t a business lunch, it was a client dinner or a breakfast meeting.
Food wasn’t something he ever gave much thought to, though he dined in the best restaurants in the city.
“Well… I do eat,” he replied.
Kaitlyn raised her eyebrows.
“I’m sorry you won’t get any more peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches,” she said.
There was a sadness in her eyes. It was obvious she missed her mom terribly.
They’d been close. Kaitlyn had never known her dad.
Alex’s had left when he was five. He had a vague memory of him, but that was all — a distant figure who’d never tried to get back in touch.
It was sad, but there was nothing to be done about it.
In that, he and Kaitlyn were the same. They’d never known their dads, and they’d been lucky to be raised by strong women, who’d done all they could to make a better life for themselves and their kids.
But for Kaitlyn to lose her mom was obviously a terrible blow. The sadness would remain.
“I’m sure you could make one for me,” Alex replied.
Kaitlyn made a face. “All those calories. It’s not good for you,” she said, and Alex laughed.
“One more can’t hurt. I go to the gym enough.”
Alex was obsessed with the gym. He went every day at six o’clock in the morning, meeting Erica, his personal trainer, for a session before work. He swam, too, constantly trying to better his own records. It bordered on obsession, his one escape from the responsibilities of work.
“So I can see,” Kaitlyn replied with an approving note in her voice.
Alex felt pleased. The main course was now cleared, and a delicious-looking chocolate dessert was presented to them.
Alex had barely spoken to his neighbor on the other side, so engrossed had he been in his conversation with Kaitlyn.
There was so much to say, and he could hardly believe the ease with which this first encounter, after so many years, was proving.
“This is delicious,” he said, reaching over to pour himself another glass of wine.
He offered Kaitlyn some, too, and they had just clinked their glasses in a toast when the master of ceremonies called for quiet, ready to toast the newly married couple.
Alex listened as Sean gave a short speech extolling Rachel’s many virtues, before proposing a toast to her.
The guests stood, raising their glasses to the couple, who were now to head to the floor for the first dance.
“It’s just like being back at the prom, isn’t it?” Kaitlyn whispered.
Sean and Rachel had led the first dance there, too, much to the consternation of Felicity Baxter and the Pinkies. Kaitlyn’s words about the prom brought back other memories of what the two of them had promised one another on that last night they’d been together.
“That was such a wonderful night, wasn’t it?” he said.
Kaitlyn nodded. “It was. But it was sad, too. We were all going our separate ways. It was difficult to know what to feel. Then you asked me to marry you.”
Alex was taken aback. He had asked Kaitlyn to marry him, but he hadn’t thought she’d remember him doing so — or want to be reminded of it.
“I did, didn’t I? With a plastic straw for a ring,” he said, remembering the way he’d fumbled one into shape under the table while Kaitlyn had been talking to Rachel.
Alex didn’t know whether to be embarrassed or not. It was a strange thing to remember, but he hadn’t realized Kaitlyn had even given him so much as a thought over all these years, let alone clung to memories like that.
“When we were thirty years old… if we were both still single,” she said.
This was the point where she would tell him she was engaged, or living with someone, or dating, or being anything other than single. Alex nodded.
“But you must have someone,” he said.
To his surprise, Kaitlyn shook her head.
“No. There’s no one. I don’t know… Things just get in the way, don’t they? It hasn’t been easy. I’ve been back in Cedarhurst for the best part of the last year, taking care of Mom. There wasn’t exactly time for dating.”
Alex didn’t know whether to feel relieved or not.
It was none of his business, of course. Kaitlyn was free to do as she pleased.
There’d been no written contract between them, just a silly promise made after too much spiked punch.
And yet, it was a promise Alex had held on to.
He’d thought about it and allowed his mind to wander around the possibility of it actually happening.
What if he and Kaitlyn did get married? They were both thirty now.
They had their birthdays in the same month, February, the eighth and nineteenth. Alex hadn’t forgotten that, either.
“I understand,” Alex replied.
“But you must have someone. Don’t tell me you’re living the life of a bachelor,” Kaitlyn said.
Alex smiled. He was living the life of a bachelor, though he had plenty of people to pick up his clothes and keep his apartment tidy. It was hardly discarded pizza boxes and piles of dirty laundry. But he was a bachelor.
“As much as you’re living the life of a spinster,” he said.
Kaitlyn made a face. “I hate that word. It makes me think of old women sitting around in a quilting circle. I’m not a spinster,” she said.
Alex laughed. “Well, whatever you are, and whatever I am, we’re the same. I don’t have anyone,” he said.
Kaitlyn shook her head. “Neither do I. And since my mom died, well… I’ve started feeling more alone than ever.”
It made Alex sad to hear that. Sad to think she was sad. He wondered what he could do to help. There was surely a way to make her feel better, to cheer her up and make her forget the sadness of her situation.
“You’re not alone. You have lots of people around you. I’m sure Rachel hasn’t let you have a moment’s peace since she started planning all this,” Alex said.
Kaitlyn smiled. “You’re right… I’ve gotten into a bad habit of feeling sorry for myself. I need to get on with things and stop feeling so miserable all the time.”
“It’s understandable. You’ve been through a lot. There’s no set time for recovery from grief. You have to go at your own pace.”
Alex knew he was repeating what other people had surely said. In truth, he knew nothing about it. He’d never lost anyone in that sense. But he could see Kaitlyn was grateful for his words.
Taking a deep breath, she nodded. “I know. But I don’t want to be mired in misery for the rest of my life. Why don’t we dance? Everyone else is.”
Alex had been too busy concentrating on what Kaitlyn was saying to notice what was going on around them.
With the speeches made, and Sean and Rachel having stepped forward for the first dance, the other couples had joined them.
The music had gone from ballad-like romantic rhythm to fast and pacey, like something from the high school prom.
Alex couldn’t remember the last time he’d danced.
It was probably at the prom when he and Kaitlyn had danced to just this sort of music.
It felt right, as though no time had passed at all.
“Come on, then,” Alex replied, taking Kaitlyn by the hand.
As they joined the throng, it was as though the years melted away.
Alex took hold of Kaitlyn’s hands, trying not to step on her toes as she danced back and forth, smiling at him, as they whirled and twirled, bumping into others as they did so.
As Alex turned, he caught the eyes of Sean and Rachel, both of whom smiled at the sight of him and Kaitlyn together.
“It’s just like prom night,” Rachel called out.
“Except you’re not wearing a crown,” Kaitlyn called back.
“I’ve still got it at home somewhere. I might wear it to the shoe store next time I go in. That’ll give Felicity something to scowl about,” Rachel replied.
Alex laughed. “Is Felicity Baxter still around?” he asked.
“She works in a shoe store in town. Her and Joel split. It was all very acrimonious, apparently. My mom used to have her hair done at Macmillan’s Salon on Market Street. Felicity’s mom worked there. My mom told me all about it,” Kaitlyn said.
Alex shook his head and smiled. The intrigues of a small town.
That was why he liked New York. It was far easier to disappear.
He’d never met any of his neighbors. His friends were from his own world.
What happened outside his bubble was of no consequence.
It was different in Cedarhurst, very different.
“How the mighty have fallen,” he said.
“I don’t think any of the Pinkies ended up being particularly happy,” Kaitlyn said. “I think Lauren Hoskins ended up in jail, something to do with her husband’s finances.”
Alex shook his head. “I think the mathletes all avoided jail. For now,” he replied.
Kaitlyn smiled. She had such a beautiful smile.
Being with her felt easy, far easier than Alex had anticipated.
It was as though they’d picked up where they’d left off, and Alex was amazed at how relaxed he felt in Kaitlyn’s company.
He was beginning to realize how much he’d missed her, and what a fool he’d been to let her slip away.
“Let’s hope it stays that way,” Kaitlyn replied as another song began and the dancing continued.