Chapter Twenty-Three
Eric
I s it normal to be scared you’ll bust your nut the second you’re inside someone? Because I’ve never had that concern before, but I can’t stop the worry from running through my thoughts now.
It still amazes me how I could spend my life logically knowing that Donovan is an attractive man but not realizing I’m attracted to him until now.
I know he said it’s different for everyone.
There’s no singular journey, and being bisexual doesn’t mean it’s this even split, but I can’t help feeling like there’s something wrong with me for not having sorted all this out before.
“What’s wrong?” Donovan asks, standing on the side of the bed.
“Nothing. Come here.” I take his wrist and pull him closer.
“Hold on.” Donovan grabs the lube and a condom from the nightstand.
“Do we need that?” It’s not something I’ve ever done—gone without a rubber—but then, I’ve never had sex with my best friend before either.
“I’m negative. I’ve been checked twice since him, and as I said, I haven’t been with anyone since.”
“I’m negative too. I was checked two weeks before I broke my ankle, and I haven’t been with anyone since either. The results are on my phone if you want to see them.” I reach for my cell, but Donovan stops me.
“I don’t need to see them. I trust you.”
It means the world to me that he can trust me after what he’s been through.
My whole body stiffens at the thought of Malcolm.
I’m not the type of man to hate anyone, but I hate him.
How could he have Donovan and cheat on him?
Not realize how fucking perfect he is. “I trust you too. I’ll leave it up to you.
Whatever you feel comfortable with.” Because I don’t ever want him to feel like he doesn’t have a say.
“I’ve never had someone come inside me before. You should be the first.”
My gut twists up. The first? Does that mean one day Donovan will do this with someone else? I almost smack myself in the head. Of course he will. One day Donovan will find a guy he’s in love with. He’ll want a serious relationship because that’s who he is, and I’ll just be…there.
“Why are you frowning? Did you change your mind?”
“Shit. No. I want it. Ignore me. Come here.”
I need to snap out of it. I’m about to fuck Donovan, and that’s all that matters.
He gets onto the bed and straddles me.
“This is nice.” I grab his plump ass, run my hands up his back, then down again until they settle on his cheeks again.
“I’m gonna make this so fucking good for you…so you always remember your first time with a guy was me.”
There he goes with that first again.
He doesn’t give me much time to think about it before he’s leaning down and taking my mouth.
I touch him while our tongues tangle, let my hands travel the expanse of his skin.
I don’t want to stop kissing him, but I also want to taste him everywhere, want to let my tongue explore every inch of his body, both known and unknown.
My dick stirs, heat settling in my groin. I groan when Donovan pulls his mouth away from mine, but then he kisses his way down my chest, lowering himself until his face is right by my cock.
“Half hard. Let’s see how long it takes me to get you the rest of the way there.”
“Probably one point five seconds.” I moan when his skillful, wet mouth wraps around my shaft.
“Fuck, that feels so good. My dick is very at home in your mouth.”
He pulls off briefly. “Not too at home. Then he’ll miss out on my ass.”
“We definitely wouldn’t want that.”
I smile at him as Donovan goes down on me again. I can’t stop myself from watching him, taking in what is hands down the sexiest mouth in the world. He bobs up and down on me, getting me hard. His ass is in the air, and I want to see it, want to see his hole and work him open for me.
“Can we try something?” I ask.
“Anything.”
“Straddle me. Turn around.”
His dark pupils flare, and he does what I say. Now I have his ass right in my face. Donovan takes me into his mouth again as I use my hands to spread his bouncy ass cheeks. His hole is so fucking tight and pretty. I’d do anything to taste it.
Leaning forward, I lash my tongue against his rim. Donovan cries out in response, my dick still in his mouth. I do it again and again, circling his pucker, tasting him, devouring his tight ass. I’m dying for it. He tastes so fucking good. Clean but like sex and Donovan too.
I keep going, keep using my tongue to soften him up, burying my face in his crease like I’m starving and he’s my last meal. My balls are so damn tight and full already. It’s killing me not to come just from the blowjob and being all up in Donovan’s ass.
He pulls off my dick like he can tell I’m close, using his hand on me instead. “Inside,” he pants. “Need to feel you inside me.”
I spit on his hole, then suck my finger into my mouth. I use the tip to trace his softened rim, then slowly push my digit inside. “Like this?”
“Fuck yes. God yes.”
I work my finger in and out of him, mesmerized by the sight of it, as if this is the first time I’m seeing it. I’ve already become an expert in having my fingers in Donovan’s ass, but knowing that this time it’s a step I take before fucking him makes it feel like a whole new experience.
“I can’t believe my cock is gonna be in here, D.”
He pushes his ass back against me. “I can’t fucking wait. I want it so bad.”
“Yeah? You hungry for it? You want my dick in your pretty little hole?” It feels so wild being able to talk to Donovan this way, so…right? Easy? Natural? All of the above. Well, those, and it’s hot as hell too.
“So much. I missed being fucked.”
An unfamiliar possessiveness overtakes me, this part of me I’ve never known that doesn’t want Donovan to miss being fucked by just anyone.
I want him to only want to be fucked by me.
“Yeah, but you’ve never had my dick before.
It’ll be so much better, having your best friend, your husband , inside you. I need you to want my cock.”
“I do,” he says breathlessly, close to a whisper. “I want your cock.”
My dick twitches. I grab the lube, pumping some down his crack, then work two slick fingers inside him. He stretches around them so sexily. It feels so incredible just around my fingers, I can’t imagine what it’ll feel like to sink into his hot, tight body with my cock.
But first… “I want to see you use your dildo on yourself. I want to see what you do when you’re alone.”
Donovan looks at me over his shoulder. His brown eyes are alight with desire, but maybe nervousness too.
“You don’t have to be embarrassed to do anything in front of me, husband. You know that. But if you don’t want to, you—”
“No,” he cuts me off. “I want to. I’ve just never done it with someone watching me before.”
“Good.” It can be something that’s just between us. Fuck Malcolm or any other guy who didn’t realize how amazing Donovan is when they had him. They don’t deserve to see him this way, see him controlling his own pleasure.
Donovan climbs off me. “How do you want me?”
“I want to see your hole when you’re filling it…want to see your face too.”
“Okay.” He turns onto his back. I toss Donovan some pillows to prop himself up, before I lean against the headboard. He’s looking my way, legs spread, cock hard, his balls so full and tempting. “You gonna grab the dildo for me or what?”
“Oh shit. Yes. I guess that would help.”
It’s in the nightstand beside me. I take the package out of the drawer and remove the toy. It’s thick and veiny. I try to imagine seeing it inside Donovan, and I’m pretty sure my brain short-circuits. “Hurry,” I rush out, fumbling the cock as I pass it to him.
Donovan chuckles. “Eager much?”
“Fuck yes. Then after I watch that, it will be my turn to be inside you.”
I actually see Donovan wiggle as a shiver races through him. He licks the lips that I really like kissing. “Hurry. Yes. I’m on board with that.”
He takes the lube from the mattress and slicks up the dildo. I use some after him before my hand goes straight to my cock, giving it slow strokes while I watch him.
“Is this what you want to see?” With his legs back, Donovan rubs the tip of the toy against his hole.
“You know it is. Push it in. Let me see you take it.”
“Jesus, babe. It’s so hot to hear you talk to me that way.” He pushes at his rim, the dildo penetrating him. “Like this?”
I swear I nearly combust right then and there. Heat flares across my skin. “Yes.” My voice comes out hoarser than I would have anticipated.
Donovan keeps going, filling himself, opening himself up with the thick toy. Each inch makes me throb harder for him, brings me closer to the edge, wanting to rip the thing out of him and slam inside. But watching him is so amazing, I don’t want him to stop that either.
“How does it feel?” I ask, needing his words too.
“I’m full, stretched open. I fucking love it, but it’s not the same as the real thing. I can’t wait until I feel you thrusting inside me.”
Welp, that’s hands down one of the hottest things I’ve ever heard. “Soon. Show me how you want it. Show me how to fuck my husband.”
His cock jerks against his stomach. It’s so fucking fun knowing he’s having that response to me. I’ve known what it’s like to turn a woman on before, but until this new aspect of my relationship with Donovan, I’ve never witnessed a man react to me this way.
“I like it deep,” Donovan says, sliding the dildo in until the balls meet his body.
“Fuuuck. You’re killing me here.”
“You like watching me?” He pulls it out, then pushes it back in again. When he does, his body arches up like he’s chasing the feeling.
“Maybe more than anything I’ve seen in my whole life,” I admit.
“It feels so fucking good.” Donovan keeps going, keeps fucking himself with the dildo for me. I’ve totally forgotten to even jerk off, but my dick is still hard as hell and leaking all over the damn place.