11. Chapter 11 - Rosalyn
My head is spinning in disbelief.
Cade?
Why is he here?
I barely remember him without the scars.
I know how happy Ava was with him.
One of the few times I saw him was in an argument between him and my family. I’ll never forget him putting my sister behind him as he stood up to my father when Ava wanted to leave and Papa wanted her to stay.
For her own good.
Yea, right. Ava was just lucky enough to get away. She knew what kind of hell life here was. Cade was helping her escape, despite my parent’s wishes.
I hate that my brothers have held to what they wanted and keep me bound here.
Aunt Betty even made sure they kept control over me after our folks died. She used all of her judicial powers to tie me down.
For my own good.
I hate that saying with every drop of blood in my body.
I don’t want to do the right thing anymore. All it’s brought me is misery.
There’s a growing part of me that wants to rebel. To do the wrong thing.
So for days in a row, I’ve taken Petunia back out into the woods to try and find Cade.
Then I work Zeus in the round pen, pushing him and myself beyond our limits, in a failed attempt to try and get Cade to erupt out of the shadows again.
“He’s looking like he’s going to be a solid fit,” John wanders up to the fence and drapes his wrists across the rails. “I’m happy to see you out here training him.”
Dropping my arms signals to Zeus I’m done, making him slow to a walk and then he moves to the gate, his sides heaving in the cold air.
I walk slowly towards my brother, scanning the forest line behind him, hoping to see a flicker of movement in the shadows.
“He’s already had a lot of initial stuff done. It’s been pretty easy to learn what he knows and expand on it.” My elbow props near John’s hand so I can turn and watch my new horse.
“He wasn’t cheap,” John grunts. “I pulled some of the funds out of your account, but you’ll need to figure out a payment plan.”
The matter-of-fact way that he indentures me to him makes my stomach roll.
“I didn’t ask for him.” Raising my chin helps to shield his view from the tears forming in my eyes.
He dips his head, then spits into the frost near his boots. “Don’t matter. You got him.” Raising his narrowed gaze, he sniffs against the cold and pulls his arms down. “Get him put away so you can start on dinner. It’s Thanksgiving and I’m hungry.”
Snow crunches under his footsteps, then he stops a few yards away. “I turned off the wi-fi. You’ve been going overboard again.”
His shoulders hunch into his thick coat, not even acting like he cares that he cut me off from the world. Again.
We’re in the middle of nowhere. Cell phones don’t work.
That weak internet signal is my only way to contact…who?
No one. There’s not a soul in the world who gives a rat’s ass that I’m here.
Hell, I have food, they don’t beat me, and I even have two horses. By most stretches of imagination, I’m rich.
Yet I hate every second of it.
“Come on, big boy.” I open the gate and let Zeus prance back into the barn. He’s settled into our routine, nothing reactive like that first night.
I pause in front of Petunia’s stall to scratch her nose. “Maybe tonight we’ll go for another ride? I gotta show John you’re worth keeping around.”
Her eyes close as she leans into my touch, almost as if she’s putting all of her trust into me. I wish she wouldn’t. I’m completely powerless in this whole situation.
If I had any control, I’d be gone.
Dusk is settling before I get the dishes done after dinner.
Neither of my brothers even thanked me for the extensive meal. They ate without a word, piling their plates to take them to the office.
Eli has been especially growly the last few days, yet won’t say why.
I learned a long time ago not to ask.
The silence is preferred over the yelling, the chairs flying, and the fists being waved in my face.
He hasn’t hit me, but I’ve seen the urge. He gets that same crazed look in his eyes that Papa used to get before he’d strip his belt out of the loops and lash at my thighs like viper bites.
A shiver works down my spine at the thought.
I’ve seen Eli lose control. He got so mad at one of the hired hands, I’m pretty sure he beat him to death in the driveway.
That was the last time I ever saw that man, even if John insisted that he was fired as the reason why.
It’s that memory that makes my chin tremble every time Eli raises his voice. I can’t help it.
All I can focus on is the image of that bloody face of the unconscious man lying in the dirt.
I don’t want it to be me.
My knuckles are soft against the smooth wood where their muffled tones emanate.
“Yea?” John pushes his head through the opening, careful not to let me see past him.
“I have everything cleaned up, I was going to go for a short ride before dark.” I jerk my thumb over my shoulder.
His nose wrinkles over his thin, blond mustache. “It’s late.”
“Yea, I just want Petunia to stretch her legs a little.” I manage a weak smile, raising my brows to show how genuine I am.
The corner of his lip curls. “Fine. She’s leaving next week anyway.”
Then he slams the door shut in my face.
It might as well have been his fist into my belly, it feels the same. Fighting a sob, I grab my coat and rush outside.
Petunia stands patiently as I try to tack her up through blurry vision while the tears fall unchecked down my cheeks. When I wipe them away with my sleeve, the frigid air makes my skin sting.
Once we’re on the backside of the barn, I give in, slumping over her to cry into her alfalfa-scented mane.
“Maybe we should just run away?” Stroking the side of her neck, I let her set her own pace along the trail. “We can leave Eli and John to whatever fuckery they’re up to.”
She lets out a soft blow through her nostrils.
I guess that’s the closest thing to agreeing I’ll get out of her.
“No one would even care,” I exhale. “You’re the only thing who even appreciates that I exist.”
“What did they do?” A deep, growling voice comes from the trees behind me.
I sit up so fast I get light headed.
Petunia’s ears whip backwards, then she stops.
“Cade?” I stammer, twisting in the saddle. I can’t see him in the shadows.
Knowing he can see me makes the little hairs on the back of my neck stand up.
“Tell me, Rosalyn. What did they do?” Cade asks again.
The sound helps me pinpoint a general clump of bushes I think he’s hiding behind.
My thoughts jumble until I land on the only thing concrete I know. “John’s going to send Petunia off next week to the sale barn.”
Rustling of branches betrays Cade’s spot before he emerges wearing a thick camouflage coat. “What?” He pulls his dark scarf down until I can see the scowl on his scarred features. “Why?”
“She got hurt.” I gesture down to the jagged scar on her leg. “She’s all I have.”
His brows drop. “What about that big fancy gelding you’ve been working all week?”
“He’s not the same.” I don’t know how else to explain it.
Cade’s arms cross as his frown deepens. “You sound spoiled. I thought you had something solid on your brothers.”
I wondered why he’s been lurking. “Wait, what do you mean? What did they do?”
Silence fills the distance between us as his eyes work over me. “I can’t be sure, that’s why I’m here.”
This time it’s my turn to stare at him.
Petunia slowly shifts under the pressure of my knee until I don’t have to strain to look.
“Did they—” I bite the inside of my cheek and grip the reins harder, steeling myself against a truth I somehow already know. “—hurt someone?”
His jaw tics under reddish whiskers that are longer than the last time I saw him.
“Maybe?” he grunts.
I’m afraid to ask. “Who?”
He thins his lips to glance at a vague distance over my shoulder before he finally answers. “My family.”