15. Sam
15
SAM
“ H i.” I held a marigold seed in my hand. “Can you feel me?”
It remained silent – asleep. But I could feel the small pulse of life waiting to break through under the thin shell that surrounded it.
Marigolds were like weeds in a lot of ways. They were pretty easy to care for and quick to grow. Inside every seed, there was a personality. Some flowers needed coaxing to break through. The conditions had to be right for them to start their journey towards the sun. Soil and water, the right combination of minerals and ingredients that the Earth could give, were a necessary component.
Personalities… Every living thing had one. You just had to understand and listen.
These were the words my mom would whisper in my ear as I watched her in her garden. She would fuss with each and every plant to make them feel special. Sometimes, we would lie down on the ground and run our hands over the blooms gently. They would push themselves up against us, seeking comfort as they bathed in the sun’s rays.
She was so natural with every aspect of being green, even more than my father.
Most elementals fell in love and married into their own elements . Earth and fire could be a lethal combination, and water and fire rarely survived the first year. The main exceptions to the rule were water and earth. Somehow, they usually made it work, even if it was sometimes a bumpy road.
Elementals are a prickly lot.
It’s almost like the star signs and how Gemini and Virgo rarely make a happy relationship. My friend Tami believed in all of that stuff. I hadn’t really thought about it. But what happens if your true love – your fated mate is the opposite of you in every way?
Hermes was a god, and I was… not. I was just a broken shell of what I was supposed to be, and I was tired of feeling like a failure, of cutting myself off from my natural abilities.
Tim was right. It wasn’t just the sickness. It was my fear. I had somewhere between one minute and eight hours to figure my shit out. I had to break through the locks I had put in place, didn’t I? If I couldn’t accomplish my part of the prophecy, all was lost. The world would fall, and I would lose Hermes forever.
I had just found him.
I had barely had a moment of happiness with him as he held me in his arms and made my skin shiver. Ancient – that is what he was. But all that mattered was now. His past happened before me. His future would go on without me. He was eternal, a perennial, and I was an annual that was only here for a short time. It would only be a season compared to the life he would live. But he would have our children and their children forever. A small part of me that would always be with him. The seed of us would continue to blossom.
He could also always watch the old recordings of me on The Carpet. A moment of me in my prime that he could relish forever. It might be silly, what I do interviewing celebrities, but I did look good doing it.
I took a deep breath and reached down into my soul – into the part of me that connected with all green living things, and I felt a tingle – nothing more. A glimmer of life but nothing more.
I placed the seed in the small container of soil I had taken from Eros’s garden and nestled it an inch under the soil. I sprinkled a little water on it and rolled my shoulders backward as if I were preparing for a sporting match.
“Little one, the air is good up here. Come to the surface. Break free of your shell.” I pushed with more might than I probably should have – but I was shit at this. If I was going to try, right now, I had to try hard.
The ground above the seed shuddered almost imperceptibly. But it happened, and a small green shoot barely broke the surface. I stroked it.
If that was my best, I was destined for failure.
Death – it kept coming back to me. What I had done, the love I had and lost for Lemony rushed back towards me, and I tried to swallow it down. I tried to deal with it so I could move on from it. I was just a child. I hadn’t understood.
I felt the walls around my connection to the power of growing – my innate ability as an earth elemental – and I pushed. The sprout slowly grew an inch.
“Good. I think you need a name. Mari? Does that sound good? Mari, I need you to help me. I need you to listen.” I stroked the small shoot. Just a baby whose time would come to an end too soon. Like all life, we blossomed and wilted and eventually died. I would die. If I couldn’t fix my problem, we would all die.
The cycles of life. Birth, growth, blooms, and death – a vicious cycle that all living things eventually felt, even the mighty oak and redwood. Nothing was forever. Not even my love. It, too, would end one day, wouldn’t it? I would wither. I would die. Hermes would live forever. I would live on inside him. My parents would live on inside me when it was their turn. And so on, the season turned, age and maturity happened. Life would fail. It was the way of life – everything had an end.
“Bloom…” I whispered. I know you can.” I reached down inside myself and willed Mari to grow. She slowly rose from the Earth and became six inches tall and bushy—then the first bud broke.
“Good girl. Rest, nourish, and live, Mari.” I whispered and petted the first flower on her stem.
I poured a little more water onto her soil and carried her to the windowsill where she could find the sun in the morning.
I did it. Well, I didn’t actually do anything too exciting, but that was more than I had ever accomplished since my sickness – since Lemony’s death.
It was stupid. A mistake from a silly child.
I was no longer that child, was I? I was a man who had blossomed with age in all aspects except who I was—the person I had turned from. No. I had run away from and had never realized it. I had been such a child, but that moment had carried a profound loss.
My mother must have understood much more than me, but she never pushed—not really. She knew I had to work it out for myself, and I was starting to understand.
But I knew it wasn’t enough. I knew I wasn’t ready.
A knock on the door made me jump out of my skin.
It was too soon.
“Come in,” I choked on the words.
“Sam, it’s… We need you downstairs,” Syke nodded.
“It’s happening.”
“It’s… Come downstairs. Eros has closed the house for the night. We have other company.” He turned without another word.
I stood there and glanced around the small room. I had brought nothing with me. I was wearing someone named Silver’s clothes who worked here in the house as a courtesan. They were tight… They might even be a little tacky, but I was grateful for them. They were the clothes of someone else, someone I might be growing into. No, not Silver… I meant a new version of myself.
But I wasn’t ready.
It no longer mattered. I just hoped that when we died, I died in Hermes' arms.
I grabbed my packets of seeds and walked to the door. “Bye Mari. I hope you have a good cycle.”
I shut the door behind me and walked down the two flights of stairs.
Apollo, Horus, Tim, and Hy all sat on stools at the bar. Syke, Kitty, and a tall guy – I guessed this was their friend Tryke that they talked about- sat at a small table. Eros and a tall, thin man in sparkly Egyptian robes stood talking quietly.
I noticed that Loki was nowhere to be seen. Figured. He didn’t seem like he was much help, anyway.
“It’s happened?” I felt my feet dragging as I stepped into the parlor. I know I should have been in awe of its elegance, and it was very pretty, but it felt like a funeral parlor.
“It’s… yes, it’s happening. The celestial bronze was delivered in a way that was surprising. The Truth – well, Medea thought of everything.”
“I know.” I nodded.
“Kitty went to the camp because Loki couldn't reach Hermes. Medea has captured him. We have to assume that he is the god whom Medea plans to power the machine. I’m just surprised that he has enough power for something so horrible.”
“When are we going?” I muttered.
Eros frowned. “We’re not. Not yet. Magic is… This is Heka. He is one of the most powerful gods of magic. He knows about the spell that Medea is using. It’s old, almost as old as the Earth, and it was created when the wild magic began to flourish and the gods noticed what man was able to do with it. The rise of the spellcasters and witches – warlocks dotting the face of the Earth as they came into their own. It scared the gods – especially the gods of magic. You have to understand that their magic, human magic, is very different than that of the eternals. Ours came from the cosmos. Theirs came from the Earth itself.”
Heka stepped forward, and his robes caught the light and sparkled. “When Geb created the Earth…”
“That’s Gaea in our pantheon,” Apollo interjected.
“Yes, the creation of the Earth is… They are all correct. Neither Greek nor Egyptian gods came first to this world. In fact, one origin is the origin of all – but the streams of time and consciousness did not cross. Greeks had an Earth mother. Egyptians had an Earth father. They are separate but one and the same in a way. Without one, the other would have never existed.” Heka nodded as if that made absolutely any sense at all.
“Ok, this just hurts my head,” Syke groaned. “Enough with the mythology lesson.”
“But it’s not a myth. It’s very real and a part of what we all need to know if we are to survive. You earth elemental, this is your history. From the magic of Geb and Gaea, your kind sprung. From their power did your abilities grow.” Heka stepped towards me.
“I’m confused.” Tim raised his hand.
“Are you saying all of the ancients are the same or they're different?” Syke asked.
“Same – yet different. Gaea is Geb and Geb is Gaea. Two sides of the same. There are many gods with two faces. The most well-known would be Janus in Rome. But from the beginning of time, many gods have served the same purpose.”
“You’re saying that I’m also Horus?” Apollo smirked at his husband. “I mean, I love myself, but… He’s right here.”
“Compared to the primordials, you are just a child, as am I. We are who we are because that was how we were born to those who saw us in the way they did.”
“Now, I am super confused.” I shook my head.
Eros came to stand beside Heka. “I was one of the first beings to stride across the cosmos. To see the sky and the planets form. I watched Gaea become who she was. But the universe can have only one beginning, child. But she also had many lives as she was omniscient in every way.”
“Oh, good job, Eros. That cleared it right up.” Apollo groaned.
“I think we’re getting in the weeds here,” Horus piped up. “Does this matter?”
“Actually, no. Let’s move on.” Heka sighed.
“Good. I have a headache.” Kitty laughed.
“The Earth's magic is wild, and a few gods of magic from all over the world put aside our differences and created a spell of runes that could stop the Earth’s magic if we ever needed to. Geb… er… Earth was asleep by this time and has slept ever since. But her magic poisoned the world and morphed into something she had never intended, as far as we know, into all of the beings of magic that now walk the Earth. It was a spell to protect the world, but we hid it away. We discovered there was no way to stop the wild magic without damning our own. This spell is the downfall of the gods as well as all children of the wild magic. It will drain us all. We will be no more.” He sounded so sad. I felt like we had no hope.
I pulled myself together. This was terrifying, but I could only focus on one thing. “Can we get back to my… er… Hermes? That’s why she kidnapped him? To power the machine?”
“Honestly, we don’t know. We can only assume.” Heka shook his head. “But not all is lost. Medea is strong, but I am older. Stronger? I don’t know. She has learned many dark arts since her ascension. We are a powerful group. We have to hope it’s enough.”
“Where’s Hecate or Circe? Wait? Are you them too?” Hy looked like he was about to cry.
“They are… them. I don’t know where they are. The Dark Raven has also disappeared and is not responding. I had hoped that we would have their help. We are on our own.” Heka frowned. He sucked at pep talks.
“What do we do?” Tim stood up.
“We fight and hope that you are ready for the biggest challenge of your life.” Eros put his hand on my shoulder. “I know you can do this. It wouldn’t have been given to you if there was no hope.”
We were all going to die.