Chapter 21
Melinda and Stacey walked into the living room to rejoin the guys after going for a short walk around the neighborhood. “Adam, I’m going home, but do you need anything else before I do?”
He gave her a slightly goofy smile. She thought it must be from the painkillers.
“No.” His shoulders dropped. “I’m going to see if I can convince Will to hang out and watch the game for a while and then call it a night.”
She felt a strange sense of responsibility toward him. Was it because he’d injured himself at her place? It was something she wasn’t going to dwell on, as the situation could have been far worse. “I’ll just check on Skye.”
“No need, she’s tucked between the side of the chair and my leg. I think she’s keeping warm.” He dislodged the sleeping kitten and set her in his lap. She began to purr softly. He said, “Thanks for everything today.”
“It was the least I could do.”
“Changing the subject,” Will said as he propped his sneaker clad feet up on the coffee table, “have you guys heard about Molly and Tim’s wedding?”
“No, what’s going on? Adam and I were going to catch the ferry over together and basically be each other’s plus one.” Melinda frowned. “Are you going to feel like going after today?”
“Of course. This will be healed by then and besides, you’re going to drive and I’ll be the co-pilot.” Adam yawned.
She laughed and rose to her feet. “I thought you were going to drive, but we can talk about this later.”
“If you two are done making plans,” Will joked, “they had to postpone—the wedding venue is booked solid. They were hoping for a cancellation but, well, Molly is very disappointed.”
“That stinks.” Adam said.
The women looked at each other. Stacey said, “I’ll give her a call tomorrow.”
“Let me know if I can help.” Melinda picked up her bag. “You’re tired. I’m going to take off, but I can stop over tomorrow to help out if you need something.”
“Nah. Will can be my slave for the next few days.” He inched forward and plucked Skye from his lap, setting her on the arm of his chair. “I’ll walk you out.”
Melinda gave him a gentle shove backward. “You’ll do no such thing.” She looked at Will. “I’ll call you tomorrow to see how our patient is doing.”
Stacey said, “I’ll go down with you. The guys want to watch the game and I’m not a huge fan of baseball.”
“Good night, Adam.” Melinda’s fingers grazed his shoulder. “If you need something, remember, I’m just a phone call away.”
“Thanks, Mel.” He looked up at her. “For everything.”
After the door closed behind the ladies, Adam let out a groan and slumped back in the chair. He had wanted to tell Melinda he appreciated her trust in sharing with him the pain of losing her husband. In addition to the fact that she’d sucked it up and gone with him to the hospital. What kind of woman did that? Walked bravely into the one place that held the most sorrow, and then stayed by his side despite the memories that couldn’t be ignored. Mel was an amazingly strong woman.
“So what was up with that comment?” Will asked. “I know you, and there was way more subtext there.”
Adam gave a one-shoulder shrug. “Mel shared some very personal details of her past with me today and it was extremely painful for her.”
Will raised an eyebrow. “And did you share your past with Melinda?”
He noticed the strong emphasis on the word your. With a sharp look, Adam said, “No.”
“Why not?”
“I was caught up in what she told me. I didn’t want to add to her burden by sharing something small by comparison.”
“Dude, what you endured was far from minor. When the IED exploded and tore the unit apart, you lost good people under your command, not to mention your injuries. That is a lot for any man to deal with. Even a tough guy like you.”
“I don’t like to talk about it.” Adam could barely croak out the words. The helplessness that had engulfed him after the accident caused him shame. He hadn’t protected his team. That’s what a good leader was supposed to do. Protect his team at all costs.
Will slammed his fist on the couch. “I get it. I was there too. I know what it was like, seeing your friends, your brothers and sisters come home in a box.”
A shadowy memory flashed through his mind. “You don’t understand. This was different. I was hurt and…I couldn’t help anyone. I was weak, defenseless. I needed people to come to my aid.” His voice rose as he continued. “That’s not how it’s supposed to be. My job was to take care of my people and I couldn’t.”
Adam heaved himself up from the chair. Holding his arm close to his body, he walked to the front window and looked out over the quiet street. His voice was low. “I understand Mel so much better now. Why she holds herself back. In some ways, we’re a lot alike.”
“She’s your friend. I get that. Stacey and I love Melinda. And you’re like a brother to me.”
“What if Mel reacts like Anita did? Sees me as less than a man?” He stared into the growing darkness. “I don’t want her to pity me or see a look of disgust on her face.”
“If you think that’s Melinda, then you have no idea what makes that woman tick. She is compassionate and caring and is nonjudgmental.”
Adam tapped his chest. “I know that in here.” Then he tapped his forehead. “But not here.”
“She’s not Anita.”
With a slow shake of his head, Adam looked at Will. He could hear the bitterness in his voice. “You didn’t see Anita in the hospital. You have no idea what it felt like to have someone who you loved look at you. Her eyes cold and empty. She stared at where my leg should have been. Her look of revulsion is something I’ll never forget.”
“Maybe she wasn’t prepared to handle the gravity of the situation. Most significant others react exactly the same way. We’ve seen it time and time again.”
Pressing fingers to his forehead Adam said, “Are you making excuses for her?”
Will blanched. “Absolutely not. I’m trying to find a way to tell you to be honest with Mel. So that if your relationship with her grows…” He let his voice trail off, “Anita was never right for you and that’s why she’s your past.”
“I know what you’re trying to do, but for tonight just let it go!”
Will studied Adam before saying, “Yeah. But don’t wait too long before you tell Melinda. You can trust her.”
Adam picked up the remote and turned on the television. “Are you staying to watch the game with me?”
“Yeah. You heard my bride, she has no interest in baseball.”
Adam chuckled. “Is this why you wanted me to live over the garage, so you’d have me around for sports?”
With a grin Will said, “Well, you found me out.”
“Since you’re staying, we’re going to need snack foods. Can’t watch a game without them. But before you do that, can you help me? I need to get into sweatpants. It’s going to be tough with one hand.”
“I wondered why you were still wearing boots. You didn’t want to take the chance Melinda would see your foot.” With a shake of his head Will joked, “Let’s get this over with. After being in work shoes all day, your feet are going to be ripe.”
He chuckled. “That’s the real reason. I didn’t want Melinda to faint twice in one day.” Adam stuck his foot out and jiggled it. “That special honor is just for you.”
Melinda sat in bed, too keyed up to sleep. She looked through the photo album she kept in her nightstand. After John died, her mother had put this together for her, condensing all the special moments they had shared into this one book. She had other photos packed away, but this one was always at the ready to provide comfort when she was missing John. And tonight, the loss was acute.
She ran her fingers over the embossed cover and turned to the first page. It was a picture of John and her at their engagement party. The young people looking at the camera wore bright smiles; their eyes were full of the promise of wonderful things to come. She turned the page. It was their wedding picture. He was so handsome.
Page after page, memories filled her heart with joy. She had been truly blessed to have loved John. Despite their short marriage, she wouldn’t have traded it for a single thing. Her only regret was that they’d never had a baby. If they had, at least she would have a part of him with her today.
She turned to the last page. It was the final picture of the two of them at the shore about a month before he died. No tears fell, just the overwhelming sense of loneliness engulfed her. She closed the album and set it aside.
With a flick of the knob, she turned off the bedside table lamp and lay back on the mound of pillows. Her eyes were wide open, sleep eluding her. She could hear the minutes click slowly on the grandfather clock in the hallway. It struck midnight and then one. She flipped back the covers and got out of bed, prowling through the shadows in the house.
Warm milk would help. She pulled a carton from the refrigerator and put a mug into the microwave. After it was warm, she stirred cocoa powder in and then shuffled back to her room, climbing under the covers. The warm cocoa soothed the edges of her jangled nerves, but it was going to be a long night.
Images of John filled her thoughts. She sipped the soothing beverage and snuggled into her mountain of down pillows and pale green comforter. With eyes growing heavy the sounds of the night lulled her to sleep.
Melinda lingered over her morning coffee. She had a perfect view out the back door to where Adam stood on the patio. What was he doing at her house so early? Her heart quickened. A slow, easy smile danced on his oh so kissable lips. When he turned and looked at her his eyes were like rich dark chocolate. He lifted his hand, extending it to her as if he was beckoning for her to join him.
She was inexplicably drawn to him. She longed to be in his arms. She seemed to glide out the door and down the steps. His fingers curled towards him, propelling her forward without words. She placed her small hand in his. Warmth radiated up her arm, heating her skin. His eyes seemed to drink in every inch of her face. He cupped her cheek and let his fingers guide her lips towards his.
Melinda could almost taste the sweet smell of chocolate that clung to him. She held her breath, waiting anxiously for the moment when his lips would caress hers. A warm sensation crept up her midsection.
Forced to open her eyes, she sat straight up. She was in bed alone with what was left of her cocoa pooling on the bedcovers and soaking her pajamas. Confused, she looked around. The patio and Adam had vanished.
Setting the mug on the bedside table, she eased out of bed and dashed into the adjoining bath to get something to sop up the mess. Mumbling under her breath about the stupidity of spilling cocoa, she blotted the liquid as best she could, turning her pretty white towels a dull brown.
“Great, just great.” She tossed the towel into the tub. Then she shed her silky nightgown and wrapped her terry robe around her. Hands on hips, she decided she was not going to be sleeping in that bed for the rest of the night. Without turning on any additional lights, she padded barefoot across the hall, the deep plush carpet drowned out the annoyance in her walk.
What was she doing dreaming of Adam Bell? He was a client and a friend. She shouldn’t be imagining what it would be like to have his fingers trail along the curve of her cheek as if relishing the feel of her skin. And what was her dream-self doing, actually yearning for his touch?
She pulled back the covers of her guest bed and slipped in between the cool jersey sheets. She lay back and closed her eyes, but she couldn’t shake the image of Adam’s seductive smile. She flipped over and readjusted the blankets. Closing her eyes, Melinda forced her mind to go blank. Dear heaven, she needed some sleep.
It had been three days since Melinda had seen Adam. They’d talked on the phone and texted a bit, but each time she volunteered to stop by, he said he was resting. Was he dealing with some PTSD? The injury to his hand may have triggered something.
Finally, having been stalled long enough, she decided to take the bull by the horns. She finished packing a cooler with fresh fruit, vegetables and salads. After loading everything in the car, she sent a quick text: Stopping by, don’t plan on staying but you’ll have provisions.
She turned her phone off so she couldn’t receive his usual no thanks text.
After making the short drive to his place, she walked up the stairs. With a sharp knock on the door, she heard, “Hold on a minute.”
She called out, “Are you decent?”
A chuckle answered her. “Not quite.”
She could hear a few cuss words, a thump and something crash.
“Adam, let me in.” The doorknob didn’t turn. “Unlock the door or I’m going to call Will.”
“I’m okay, I just knocked over the side table. Give me one more minute.”
She pulled her phone out just as the door opened. Adam had a three-day growth on his chin. At first glance she saw the apartment was a mess, which was surprising given his tendency toward neat and tidy. His face lit up when he saw her. His brown eyes twinkled with merriment as he noticed the cooler over one arm and she balanced her phone and handbag in her other hand. He held out his good hand to take the cooler. “You’re a persistent lady, aren’t you?”
Melinda stepped into the apartment, dropped a bag on the sofa and immediately walked over to the table, righting it and picking up the shards of coffee-coated glass.
“I’ll get that,” Adam said, coming up behind her.
“It’ll be quicker if I do it.” She gestured to the kitchen. “You can unload the cooler and I’ll take it with me.”
With a soft laugh, he did as she asked. She heard him give a low whistle. “I’m not starving or anything.” He poked his head out of the kitchen. “But everything looks great.”
“That’s good.” She entered the kitchen and walked to a long cupboard. “Is the broom in there?”
“I’ll get it for you.”
She found it cute as the flush covered his cheeks. “Tell you what, you can make us coffee and I’ll finish cleaning up, and then I need to get back to my office.”
“Working today?” He filled the coffeepot with fresh water and measured out the beans to grind.
Melinda took the container from him and nodded appreciatively at the label. “Grinding beans? You’ve got fancy coffee.”
“My sister got me hooked on it when I retired from the Corps.”
“Remind me to thank your sister, if I ever meet her.”
“By any chance did you tuck anything sweet in that other bag?” He pointed to the one she had set on the sofa.
“You’re incorrigible, but yes. I brought muffins—banana nut, which I believe is your favorite.” She gave him a saucy grin.
With mild surprise he beamed. “A woman who takes note of the little things. Nice.” Turning the coffee on to brew he said, “One of these days I’m taking you out for coffee.”
She started to mildly protest and Adam laughed. “Mel, it’s just coffee.”
She wiggled her eyebrows. “In my line of work lots of things can happen with ‘it’s just coffee’.”