22. Halliday
22
HALLIDAY
“What the hell? What are you doing here?” I gape at Rory standing with an arrogant smirk on his face.
“I was worried. I heard you had an accident. I thought you’d be at your apartment. I didn’t expect to find you here.” Rory’s gaze roams around the room, and he frowns as he looks out of the windows at the multi-million-dollar view. “Looks like you’ve settled in just fine.”
I whip my gaze beside me. “Sterling, I?—”
His arm has already detached itself from me before the deep rumble of his voice makes my heart squeeze. “Sounds like you two have some talking to do.”
“It’s not?—”
“Hallie,” he says, his eyes pinned on Rory. “Why don’t you go and get dressed. I’ll keep your husband company until you come back.”
I turn and rush from the room.
I go into Sterling’s dressing room and pull a knitted dress from a hanger. I take off his shirt, unable to look at it as I place it carefully down onto the large stool in the center of the room. I pull on some underwear and the dress, then drag on a pair of long boots and grab my coat.
I rake my fingers through my hair as I race back into the living area.
The two men are facing one another in silence. Sterling’s leaning back against the counter drinking his coffee, seemingly relaxed, while Rory has his hands on his hips, glaring at him.
At least there isn’t blood.
“Sterling—”
“Why don’t you go to that place two blocks over that does good coffee? I’m afraid I’ve run out.”
His eyes meet mine for a brief moment, and I swallow, my voice stolen from me at how business-like he’s being.
How devoid of emotion.
I nod mutely, looking at the floor.
“Hallie?”
I snap my eyes back to his, hope burning in my throat.
“It’s okay, we’ll speak later.”
His eyes darken, then his gaze leaves mine, taking the air in my lungs with it. He’s dismissing me. He won’t even hear me out. Won’t let me explain.
I stare at him while he sips his coffee, his eyes back on Rory. What was last night about? He said he loved me. I told him I had fallen head over heels in love with him. I cried while he was inside me because everything between us had felt so intense.
How can he switch off from that in the blink of an eye? All from one word?
Husband.
I know it’s a big word, but if he’d listen to me… If he’d let me speak…
Bile rises in my throat as he leans back against the counter, one ankle crossed over the over.
A picture of calm.
I knock past Rory and head straight for the door.
I need air.
“You look great.” Rory scans the top half of my body as I sit opposite him at a window table for two.
He reaches across the table for my hand, but I slide it away and wrap it around the mug of my untouched Americano instead. I keep my other hand beneath the table, a small piece of black onyx wrapped inside my palm. It’s a crystal that aids in strength and moving beyond bad relationships. I always keep a pouch of mixed crystals in my purse. You never know when time might call for one to assist you.
And I need all the help I can get for this conversation.
“Why are you here?”
He leans back with a smirk. “Is that any way to greet your husband?”
“You’ve never been my husband!” I snap. “That was a mistake, and you know it. I don’t even remember any of it.”
“Shame. I remember it all. Especially how eager you were to say, ‘I do’.”
I roll my eyes. I doubt that was the case, but the fact I was so drunk I can’t remember means I keep my mouth firmly shut. Rory can say whatever he likes about that night in Vegas and our so-called ‘marriage’. None of our friends who were out that night can fill me in, either. Apparently, Rory and I disappeared, and the next morning was the first they heard about our little visit to the walk-in chapel. I’m just glad I woke alone, with Rory on the couch of the hotel room and not in the bed with me. He confirmed we hadn’t… consummated it. I called Sophie immediately in a wild panic, and she was already on our annulment before I’d dragged my aching, hungover body out of bed.
“Calm down, I’m only teasing,” Rory says, throwing his hands up in mock surrender when I glare at him.
“Yeah? Just teasing when you called yourself my husband in front of Sterling too, huh? You had no right.”
“Hey, I didn’t know you haven’t been honest with the old guy.” He leans across the table, resting on his forearms. “You’re not… You’re not actually fucking him, are you?”
“That’s none of your business!” I hiss. But my gut twists. He’s right. I should have been honest with Sterling sooner.
“Never had you down as a grave robber.”
“Will you shut up and tell me what you’re doing here?”
“Your mum and dad’s new TV is great.”
The blood in my veins boils as he lifts his coffee to his lips, taking a leisurely sip. I want to knock it out of his hand and slap him.
“Your dad needed some help setting it up. I ended up staying for lunch. They’re so proud of you. They didn’t stop telling me the whole time I was there.”
“Don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
He smiles at me like we’re old friends catching up without a care in the world. He might think we were friends once. I even did. But he would never have kept Vegas hanging over me like an axe all these years if he was truly my friend.
“Don’t bring my parents into this. I won’t let you do that anymore.”
He whistles. “Coming to New York gave you some extra sass. I like it on you.”
I swallow the bile in my throat as his eyes drop to my cleavage.
“I’m not doing this again.”
I stiffen at the negative energy surrounding him. He’s a liar. He said he’d stop. But here he is. Again.
“It’s only thirty grand, Halliday. That’s pocket change to you. Definitely pocket change to?—”
“Keep Sterling out of this.”
His eyes glint before he shrugs. “Sure, whatever. I just need it to tide me over while I wait for some things to get sorted. It’ll be the last time.”
I snuff out the spark of hope that ignites in my gut at his words before it can gather momentum. It’s not worth it. I stopped believing a word that came out of Rory’s mouth a long time ago.
I exhale wearily and my gaze wanders over the row of parked cars on the street.
“No.”
“No?” he scoffs.
“No,” I repeat with more force.
“You don’t mean that.” Desperation creeps into his tone. He’s never heard that word from me before.
I turn back to him. “I’ve had enough of you turning up in my life like this. It has to stop.”
“It will. This is the last time, I promise.” His eyes bore into mine, and a tiny part of me feels sorry for him.
“You say that every time.”
“I mean it.”
I shake my head. “Rory?—”
“Don’t say no. Please. Just… think it through first. One more time, that’s it.”
His gaze is pleading, and I grip the crystal in my palm so hard that my fingers ache.
What will he do if I really do put a stop to it all? He’s more riled today than I’ve seen him before. He’s a man on edge, and that’s dangerous. He could finally do what he’s been hinting at all this time.
He could destroy everything.
But if I let this go on when will it end? He might never stop. And now he knows I’m with Sterling, he could try and use that. Sterling’s got a lot more money than me. Rory doing this to me is bad enough. But I can’t allow him to drag Sterling into any of my mess. I can’t.
“Go home, Rory,” I say as I stand, fighting to keep my voice from betraying how terrified I am at what he might do.
What he might ruin.
“Halliday?”
“Enough is enough.” I look at him with a mix of pity and disgust.
Before my strength deserts me, I walk out.
Glancing back through the window as I rush down the sidewalk, I spot Rory.
He’s sitting with his head in his hands.
Like a man who’s lost everything.
“Don’t tell me he won’t see me!” I glare at the doorman outside Seasons.
Walking from the coffee place to Sterling’s office has allowed me more time to think. More time to get angry. So much of that anger is at Rory. And so much is at myself too.
But all of the energy bubbling beneath the surface, ready to fly out now, is for Sterling.
The doorman listens to something in his earpiece, his eyes on mine.
“Mr. Beaufort was on a call. I’m checking it’s finished.”
“And has it?”
He inclines his head, opening the door for me. “Go ahead, Miss Burton.”
“Thank you!” I snap, storming down the corridor.
Rory dropping in all those little things about my parents—he really enjoyed telling me those parts—and flying over here to use me again has started a storm inside me.
Bastard. Bastard. Bastard.
But at least my disdain for him is distracting me from the pain seeping through my veins at the way Sterling let me go with Rory. The way he didn’t let me explain.
The way he did nothing .
His office door hits the wall as I throw it open and rush inside without knocking.
“Is that it? This is how you’re going to be? You’re not going to listen to what I have to say? You’re going to let a guy like Rory turn up and ruin it all?”
“Hello, Hallie.” His blue eyes flick up from the paperwork he has in his hand momentarily. Then he takes his time signing it, before putting the lid on his pen and placing it down.
He sits back in his seat and runs a hand around his jaw, his eyes scanning over me and making my cheeks heat.
“How was your coffee?”
I stomp to his desk, ripping my coat off on the way and chucking it onto the sofa as I pass it.
“How was my coffee?” I splutter, screwing my face up.
He holds my eyes, looking completely unruffled, while I worry I might pop a vein at any minute.
“It’s good there. The beans are brought in fresh daily. That’s why I recommend it’s where you two go.”
“I have no idea how my stupid coffee tasted. You know why? Because I couldn’t drink a drop after the way things were left between us at your place.
“The way things were left?” His eyes pinch a fraction.
“Why are you so calm?” I shriek. “A man just appeared claiming to be my husband, and you aren’t even bothered. If that were me, I’d be spitting feathers. I’d be…”
I slam my palm down onto the desk, sucking in air like I’m in danger of passing out.
“I’d be?—”
“You’d be all fired up like you are now,” Sterling muses, studying me. “All that energy when I first met you. All that grit. You’ve been worrying so much that it’s been doused recently. Not anymore.” A small smile curls his lips. “Welcome back.”
I falter, taking a step back from his desk. Is he messing with me? Is this all a big game to him?
He holds my eyes but makes no attempt to stand or come to me. No attempt to stop me from spinning on my heels and stalking out of his office again.
“He isn’t my husband.”
“Come here.”
My brows shoot up at his demand.
“Come here, Hallie.” He pushes his chair away from his desk, making a gap big enough for me to slide in front of him.
Something in his low tone makes me comply. I have to know what he’s thinking. Why he’d cut me off like this without letting me explain.
Even if I’m about to get my heart handed back to me, ripped to shreds, I have to know what he’s going to say.
And after everything that’s happened, I need to look into his eyes as he says it.
I slip into the small gap and lean back against his desk, my arms crossed tightly over my chest like they’ll offer protection.
His eyes burn into mine and he reaches up to loosen his tie.
“Sit,” he commands.
I don’t move.
He uncurls my arms gently, placing them down by my sides. Then he grips my waist, lifting me onto the desk.
My ass lands on top of the paperwork he was signing, creasing it, but he doesn’t seem to care.
“Lean back.”
I stare at him, my chest heaving with angry, confused breaths. He takes his time rolling one shirt sleeve up, followed by the other with meticulous care.
My eyes drop to the scars running up his left forearm. He was so tender last night. So loving. I desperately want to hold on to those memories if they’re all I’ll have left of him after today.
He plants a hand over my chest. “Lean back,” he repeats, easing me down until I’m resting on my elbows.
“What? Why?”
He slides his hands down my thighs slowly.
Then he shoves my dress up around my waist like his patience has snapped.
“What are you doing? Sterling?”
“Removing obstacles.”
He holds my eyes and hooks a finger into my lace panties, ripping them. Cool air whips against my clit and I shudder, trying to clench my thighs together.
He brackets his hands around my flesh, the veins in his arms popping as he forces my legs apart.
“You won’t even remember his name when I’m done with you, Hallie. Husband or not.”
His gaze drops between my thighs and each warm breath he takes skates over my skin leaving goosebumps behind.
“I don’t understand. Don’t you have questions? Aren’t you mad?”
“I’m livid. But I’ve also waited a long time to do this.”
There’s a shimmer glossing over the rage. It passes through those dreamy eyes the way it does when he does something charming. When he acts like a gentleman.
His attention returns between my legs where he’s spreading my pussy lips wide with two fingers.
He pulls his chair closer.
And spits directly on my clit.
“Mine,” he growls.
I jolt off the smooth wood surface as he engulfs my clit with his mouth and sucks.
“No, you don’t, Baby girl. You aren’t going anywhere.” He slides both hands under my ass and grabs it, slamming me down on the desk, sinking back into me with a groan like he’s in ecstasy. “So damn beautiful.”
My breath comes in pants as arousal thrums through my body, all at his command. It doesn’t matter that my head’s spinning with confusion, my body reacts to him like a crazed fan meeting their hero; eager and desperate to relish every second.
He gives my ass a firm squeeze before freeing one hand and spearing me with two fingers. He curses at the way I whimper from the intrusion and gets straight into eating me out fiercely.
“Jesus, you’re soaking.” He pumps his fingers in and out of me, and my body makes obscene wet sounds.
“Sterling,” I whimper. “What?—?”
“You learn so much more by listening and not talking, Hallie.” He sucks my clit hard again, making my back bow as another wave of wetness runs down his fingers. “So why don’t you talk? And I’ll listen.”
He pushes his face into me, eating me out like a man possessed. His darkened gaze bores into mine.
Last night was amazing. Hot, but tender too.
This is… this is pure carnal desire.
“Start talking while I enjoy your pretty cunt, Baby girl,” he growls.
Yep, dirty, filthy, carnal desire.
“H-he’s not my husband,” I moan as Sterling adds a third finger and my body accepts it greedily.
I pause and his fingers halt in their movements, his tongue leaving my clit. I want to squeal at the loss.
“B-but he was for a few hours,” I confess.
He curls his fingers and strokes my G-spot, sucking my clit between his lips again.
“God, Sterling, please.”
“Keep going, Hallie.”
He swirls his tongue in circles over my swollen clit, rewarding me for every word I speak. I’m desperate for him to keep going. Not just for the mind-blowing pleasure that’s taking over my body, but because I want to tell him.
I need to tell him.
“It happened in Vegas at a friend’s birthday,” I say in a rush. “I had too much to drink. It’s why I don’t drink anymore. We didn’t… Nothing happened… I’ve never liked him that way. I don’t even remember going to the chapel.”
“What else?”
I reach down and grab a handful of Sterling’s hair, throwing my head back with a moan as he pushes his tongue inside me.
“Sophie’s a lawyer. She annulled it for me the minute I found out what had happened.”
His growl vibrates against me and my body sends wetness flooding his tongue. He inches back, swallowing with a curse.
“So damn sweet.”
He pushes his fingers inside me and fucks me roughly with them as his mouth returns to my clit. His stubble rubs against my inner thighs, and I tighten them around his head.
“I’m going to come if you keep doing that,” I whimper as he tongues my clit with precise skill.
He holds my eyes and confusion swells in my chest.
“I don’t understand. Are we over?” I choke, teetering on the edge of coming, yet fighting against it.
I don’t want to be his angry fuck. The one he has before he breaks my heart and pushes me away.
“I wish it had never happened. I never wanted it. I’ve regretted it every second since.” I twist my hand in his hair as a roll of pleasure curls its way around my throat and squeezes. “I love you. Does that mean nothing now?”
His eyes darken. “It means everything, Baby girl. You damn well know it does.”
He speeds up his lashing on my clit, massaging my G-spot again with thick fingers.
“Sterling—”
“I believe you. I know you would have told me yourself when you were ready,” he says against me, like he doesn’t want his mouth to leave my skin for a moment. “I told you it was okay. Right before you left. I told you it was okay.”
“But—”
“Come on my face. I’ve spent all morning missing you.”
His tongue flattens, working over my clit with the perfect amount of pressure. My core coils tighter and tighter. But I still can’t let go. My head is stuffed full of doubt.
“I love you, Hallie,” Sterling soothes. “And I’ll still love you after the last breath leaves my body. Now come back to me, Baby girl, and show me you’re mine.”
He circles my clit over and over, watching as I toe the line between giving up control or desperately clinging to it. “That’s it, let it go.”
Every muscle in my body draws in tight, and my thighs quiver around his head.
“Let it go, my beautiful girl,” he purrs.
“Fuck!” I come hard and a gush of wetness squirts out of me and sprays over his cheeks and chin.
“Jesus Christ, yes.” He sinks into me, lapping up every drop he can. “Damn, Baby girl, drown me with it, come on.”
I shudder and shake against his relentless sucks, licks, and kisses as more seeps from me, running down his chin.
I’ve never done that before.
Our eyes lock. The blaze in his has me mesmerized. It’s hypnotic.
I ride out the last clenches in my body, then sag back onto my elbows, my grip falling from his hair.
He takes his time pressing gentle kisses over my sensitive flesh, and my pussy clenches when his stubble grazes my clit.
I can’t talk. I can barely breathe.
All I can do is stare at him in shock.
His silver stubble glistens with wetness. He runs his tongue over his lower lip like he’s savoring the taste of me. Then he lifts the length of his tie and mops up the drops from his chin.
The silk is stained, ruined.
“I might damn well frame it,” he rasps, arching a brow at the way I’m staring at him.
He leans back in his chair, eyes swimming with tenderness again, just like they were last night.
Before Rory showed up.
“I don’t… I thought you were mad. You told me to leave. You?—”
“I said you two needed to talk. I never told you to leave. I would never tell you to leave.”
He tugs me into his lap so I’m sitting sideways with my legs draped over his.
“I—”
“I’ve been wanting to taste you on my desk since that first night we kissed.”
His lips travel to my neck, and he kisses beneath my ear, murmuring about how good I smell.
“I… thought you were angry.”
“I am.” He looks me dead in the eye. “I’m angry at myself for not preventing the look on your face when you saw him.” He cups my jaw, tilting my face toward his. “You looked so worried.”
Shame and guilt attach themselves to me like a million tiny parasites, the way they do whenever I think about Vegas.
“My parents don’t know. I planned to tell them, but it was the first anniversary of losing Jenny, and Rory talked me out of it. He said they’d be ashamed, and I’d break their hearts. He said I’d completely wrecked everything she believed in. And he was right. I was so drunk I married someone I don’t even like.”
A sob bursts out of me, and I press a hand to my mouth.
“Jenny believed in love and soulmates. She’s the one who gave me my faith in it too. And yet, I did that .”
Sterling holds me as I break into ugly hiccups and sobs.
“You were grieving, Hallie. We do stupid things when we feel like we’ve lost everything.”
He looks at me with such love and understanding that my chest splinters into ragged breaths and more tears fall.
“I don’t even remember it. I didn’t think I’d had that much to drink. Rory said I was the one who… the one w-who suggested we do it.” I cover my face with both hands. “I’m a f-fraud. I vow to find people true love. And I married on a drunken whim like it was n-nothing.”
Light filters through my eyelids as Sterling eases my hands from my face.
“Rory told you all of that?”
His eyes are narrowed, pinned on me as I peel my lids apart. If I thought there was rage in them before, then it’s nothing compared to the murderous intent that’s there now.
I wipe beneath my eyes. “He’s right. I will never forgive myself.”
“No. He’s a cockroach who’s been manipulating your grief. How long has he been calling you every day?”
I falter. “It can be weeks. Months, even, without a word from him. But it always starts again when he wants something.”
I feel so pathetic admitting it. I run my own successful business, but I can’t get a guy like Rory to leave me alone.
My gaze drops to Sterling’s hand on my thigh, and I gently dust my fingers along his forearm, over his scars.
“When he wants something?”
I grimace.
“What’s he threatening you with?”
I fight back the growing lump in my throat.
“Hallie?” Sterling growls.
My fingers tremble against his skin. “He said he’ll tell my parents. I’m worried they’ll never forgive me for lying all this time. And he said my clients might be interested to know that I divorced my husb?—”
“Annulled! He was never your husband,” Sterling thunders, his grip tightening on my thigh.
I trace over his scars with shaking fingertips, desperate to cling on to something that grounds me in the way the touch of his skin against mine does.
He exhales slowly, stroking my thigh gently as though my touch is calming him too.
“What else?”
I glance up.
“What else?” he presses. “I can see it in your eyes.”
What I’m about to say next pains me more than knowing I married Rory in the first place. At least that was one isolated mistake. Just one.
“He helped my family… with money. My parents used their savings for Jenny’s school. I thought he was being a good friend and was so grateful. When my business began doing well, I repaid him. But then he asked me for a loan.
“I gave it to him. I was scared he’d tell my parents, jeopardize my business. He said he’d pay me back, but I haven’t seen any of it. All that money I’ve loaned him is gone. I might as well have stolen it from Jenny’s charity myself.”
Even Sophie doesn’t know how much I’ve lent Rory over the years. I’m too embarrassed to admit it. I thought he’d stop asking. He always says it’s the last time, just like he did today. I hoped I’d earn enough from my matches that I could give more to Jenny’s charity than Rory has cost me.
“Every time I think it’s over, I start to hope. But he always shows up again sooner or later. I told him to never come back today. I’ll tell my parents. I’ll deal with whatever happens to my business. I can’t let him keep doing this. I’m not a woman who deserves your love if I don’t stand up to him.”
“Let me take care of it. I’ll make sure you never have to see him again,” Sterling says with a finality that makes me suck in a breath.
I didn’t think Sterling would ever be capable of hurting another person. This is the man who has held me when I’ve cried, who donates millions to charity, who has spent his entire life feeling like he was never anyone’s choice.
A man with so much love in every cell of his body.
But one look into his eyes now and I see that, for those he loves, there isn’t any limit to how far he’ll go.
I shake my head. “No. This is my fault. I need to fix it. Enough is enough. And I can’t risk him pulling you into it. You don’t deserve that.”
He presses the softest of kisses to my forehead.
“I’m so proud of the woman you are. It’s one of the reasons I fell in love with you. You care for others more than yourself. He’s abused the purest part of you. But you don’t need to do things alone anymore. I’m here. And I will be here for you no matter what.”
I sink my face into his neck, drawing strength from his trust and faith in me.
From his love.
He strokes my back, his touch strong and reassuring.
“You’ve got me now, Hallie. You don’t need to worry about anything. I love you. I love you so damn much.”
It takes everything in me to focus on his words and hope that he’s right.