Chapter 9
SAM
Some days at the hospital were good. There was no better feeling than saving a patient.
Not just saving their life but making their pain go away, or infection, or simply improving their quality of life.
It was why I'd gotten into this line of work in the first place.
But other days were plain hard. You had losses.
And on days like this, things were really shitty.
There'd been a massive accident with thirty patients arriving in the ER.
They called me down from peds. All hands had been on deck.
Everyone had pulled their weight, and it still hadn't been enough.
We'd lost more patients than we saved. This was a bad day for all of us.
The mood in the doctors' lounge was grim. It was crowded. All seats were taken, and a few people were standing against a wall. No one wanted to be alone, not after a day like this; as humans, we processed losses better as a group.
When I first started the job, I used to drive myself crazy going through everything I'd done, wondering what I could've tried.
Now I knew better than to do that. What was done was done.
I needed my head clear so I could save someone else.
Or in this case, I needed to leave what had happened at the door of the hospital so I could relax tonight and be ready to hop back on tomorrow.
It was imperative not to take my losses forward with me. But even though I knew the drill, it was easier said than done.
I was one of the first to leave the doctors' lounge that afternoon. I wasn't on call tonight, and for the first time in many years, I debated actually turning off my phone. It wasn't frowned upon, since I was officially off duty, and I really needed to decompress tonight.
I heard footsteps behind me as I approached the locker room, and I turned around.
"Hey, Sam.”
It was Jean. She and I were the same age, but she’d started here after we graduated med school.
"Hey, Jean.”
"Look, we all did everything we could today," she said, maybe more for herself than anyone.
I waved my hand. “Let's just leave it at that. All I want is to get out of here and not think about this shitty day.”
"Oh, that makes two of us. I plan to go out and get a few drinks.”
“Sounds good.”
“Do you want to join me? I'm buying."
“I never let a woman buy me drinks.”
“Well, if you want to take me out on a date, I won't say no.”
I stared at her. She's asking me out! Fuck me, I must be really out of it if I didn't realize it. "Jean, no offense, but I'm not in the dating pool."
Her smile fell. "We could go out as colleagues, then."
In theory we could, but I knew better than that. When someone asked you out, they couldn't switch immediately to friend mode or coworker mode.
"I have other plans tonight."
She nodded, turning around and heading in the opposite direction. I was certain she’d intended to go into the locker room to change as well. Now she was avoiding me. Great! This wasn’t off to a good start, but we were both professionals. We could overcome any awkwardness if we had to work together.
I took a quick shower, getting out of my scrubs and dressing in jeans and a T-shirt.
Decompressing with fellow docs was a normal thing in hospitals, but I didn't want that tonight.
I didn't want to go with a group and talk about the day and unpack one another's baggage, telling ourselves that we'd made up what we lost today by saving other people.
You never made up for a lost life. You just did your best not to lose more.
I took out my phone and checked my messages, which was one of the first things I did after a shift was over.
Paisley: Uncle Sam, if a boy asks a friend out, can I give him THE TALK, or is it uncool?
I threw my head back, laughing. I loved my niece immensely. How would she even know what "the talk" was?
Sam: Hell yes you can.
Somehow my niece had gotten it into her head that I was the go-to person to ask if something was cool. I had no idea how I’d even gotten myself into that role, but I was going with it.
Paisley: Thank you.
I didn’t have any other messages. I put my phone in my back pocket, wondering what to do tonight.
I thought of hanging out with Avery, maybe enjoying a glass of wine, maybe making her blush again.
Energy coiled through me. Yes!! That's what I want to do tonight.
We were starting on a dangerous path, but as usual when it came to Avery, I wasn't able to help myself.
I left the hospital a few minutes later, heading straight home. I stopped at the deli down the street that sold Indian food. It was a long shot, but in my experience, once people had a favorite food, it remained their favorite even years later.
Avery had always loved mango chicken. I ordered one for her and a chicken korma for myself. The restaurant owner was an elderly woman. She must have been in her eighties, but she was quick and agile. She reminded me of Gran. I tipped her well when she handed me my order.
I could already feel the tension bleeding from my body, and it wasn't because I was finally going home. It was because Avery was there.
I arrived earlier than usual. Typically after I finished my shift, I went for a run around the hospital campus to get rid of any excess adrenaline. But tonight I wanted to come straight here.
I walked through the inner courtyard and up to the loft. Unlocking the front door, I couldn't get past how much it felt like we were a couple. Most nights, we ate dinner together and caught up about our day.
Back in high school, we’d talked about moving in together once we graduated. It felt ironic that we were doing so sixteen years later… as roommates.
I opened the door wide, stepping inside. Several things clicked at the same time. First, Madonna's "Like a Virgin" was blasting through the loft. Second, Avery was dancing to it. And third, she was buck naked.
I turned hard instantly. I knew I should announce my presence, but I couldn't take my eyes off her. She had the same slender waist as in high school, but her ass had filled out a bit. Her long blonde hair covered her breasts, but it swayed with every move.
"Avery," I said, but it sounded more like a growl, not like her name. I cleared my throat and tried again, louder. "Avery."
She shrieked, spinning around. "Sam." She covered her boobs with one hand and put the other in front of her pussy. I was so hard, it was damn painful. "Alexa, turn off the music." Madonna shut up instantly. "Oh my God, turn around."
Yeah, that would've been the gentlemanly thing to do from the get-go. But I couldn't think straight. It took all my self-control to turn away. I gripped the edges of the kitchen counter, taking in deep breaths.
"Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God," she chanted as she ran up the staircase, probably to her bedroom. "You were supposed to be here in an hour. That's what the schedule on the fridge says."
"I know," I said loudly, trying to think of extremely unpleasant things so my erection would die down. I thought about scalpels, cutting through skin, blood. Nothing helped. Nothing beat that image of Avery dancing naked in the living room. I wouldn't be able to forget that any time soon.
I heard footsteps on the stairs a few minutes later, and I turned around slowly. I couldn't ignore her the whole evening, or avoid looking at her. She was wearing a blue dress, but I still had her naked body imprinted in my brain.
"Sorry about that," she said.
"I thought about surprising you with dinner. I should've given you a heads-up that I’ll come earlier."
"Why did you get off sooner?”
"I always finish earlier than what’s on the printed schedule. I go for a run, so by the time I get home it’s about an hour later."
"After you work for so many hours, you go for a run?" The look on her face was priceless. It was good for me both physically and mentally—it gave me time to mull over the day and put it behind me.
"How do you think the 'holy hotness' gets to exist?"
She lowered her eyes, obviously still uncomfortable about the whole situation.
"Too soon for naked jokes?" I teased.
Her cheeks turned pink. "Oh my God, Sam." She shook her head, closing her eyes.
I had to take a break from making her squirm and blush, no matter how much I liked it; otherwise, I was going to kiss her. In fact, I might do much more than that. I needed to know how her lips felt beneath mine. And that body. Fuck, I needed to touch her.
"I was going to make dinner," she said.
"Salad again?" I chuckled.
"That's why you thought about bringing dinner, didn't you? You hated my salad."
I looked at her, focusing on her vibrant green eyes and not her tempting mouth. "I didn't hate it, just wanted something more substantial. The Indian food down the street looked good. You still like mango chicken?"
"Yes. It's one of my favorites." She looked at the bag behind me on the counter. "You remembered that?"
I grinned. "I remember everything about you, Avery. Everything."
"And yours is still chicken korma?"
Something twisted in my chest. It was like a pressure had suddenly deflated.
"Yeah. Yeah, it is."
She took out the food, putting it on plates. "Want to tell me why your day was so shitty that you didn't even go for a run? Or you don't have to." She probably saw the change of expression on my face.
"I'll just tell you what happened so you know, but I don’t want to talk about it."
"Okay."
"There was a massive accident, and everyone was brought to our ER. We lost a lot of patients."
"Oh no. I heard it on the news but didn’t realize they were transported to your hospital. They did say the accident was horrific and there were a few deaths on-site. The expressway is still closed. Oh, Sam, I'm so sorry."
"Getting over a loss doesn’t get easier. And this was plural. A lot of people died at the hospital." My mind wouldn’t let go as it played a video of the ER scene; it was massive and dreadful, to say the least.
"I'm guessing you wanted to just relax and sleep tonight?"
"Yes and no. I just wanted to take my mind off it, which you did brilliantly with your sexy dance." And there I went again, making her blush. I couldn't help myself. But coming home to a naked Avery was just what the doctor ordered. Pun intended.
I wanted to lean in and check exactly how far down her dress that blush went. It spread on her neck and the part of her chest the fabric didn’t cover.
She smiled slightly. "If it was for a good cause, then I'm not feeling as embarrassed about it."
"You shouldn't be embarrassed at all. Your dancing is on point, as usual, and you're so fucking sexy, Avery. Your body is perfect, as far as I can see."
She looked me straight in the eyes, jutting her chin forward and clearing her throat. "Sam."
"You're using your boundaries voice, Avery, but you haven't set any."
"That's because every week we seem to break every boundary known to mankind. Seems like a waste of time to set any. Now let's eat, and while we do that, I'll brainstorm ways to distract you this evening."
"I suggest dancing."
She grinned. "Don't start again."
"Hey, I didn't say anything about naked dancing, but glad to know your mind went straight there."
She narrowed her eyes before taking a spoonful of food. I was damn hungry too. It had been a long while since I’d had my last meal.
"This is very good," she murmured. "I remember the shop now. It's literally down the street. Two blocks away."
"Yeah, the one with the elderly lady at the counter," I confirmed.
"Do they have delivery as well?"
"I didn't ask, but you can tell me whenever you're in the mood for it. It's on my way from the hospital anyway."
She nodded, eating with huge gulps. She finished eating before I did.
"I'm glad this is still your favorite dish,” I said. “I was hoping I’d made the right choice.”
"I was famished," she admitted. "And I have a few ideas about distracting you."
"Does it include dancing?"
She sighed. "There's no winning with you."
I shook my head, laughing. “Nope. So, what do you have in mind?”