Chapter 5
Nina
Iwake from yet another nightmare to a dark, unfamiliar room and suck in a quick breath, clutching the sheets to my chest as my eyes dart around and my heart races so fast I can feel its rapid beat. When I realize I’m the only one in the bed and that my clothes are still on, I begin to relax.
“It’s okay, Nina. You’re safe.”
Vasily’s deep, accented voice comes from a dark corner of the room, and I have to strain to make out the silhouette of his broad shoulders.
He’s sitting in one of the chairs by the French doors, but it’s way too dark for me to see anything clearly.
My arm aches from my tattoo, and I feel groggy from whatever the hell was in that syringe, but as I slowly start to wake, everything comes back to me, and before I know it I’m crying so hard I can barely breathe.
In seconds, Vasily’s crossed the distance and wrapped his arms around me.
My first instinct is to tense at the feel of his strong body against mine, but he doesn’t back away, just gently holds me, murmuring something in Russian while he strokes my head and rubs my back until my body relaxes into his.
He’s no longer in his suit. At some point while I was sleeping he’d showered and changed into joggers and a long-sleeve tee, and it’s hard for me to wrap my head around this casual side of the big, scary Bratva boss.
When I’ve got control of myself, I take a shaky breath and whisper in a hoarse voice, “I’m sorry.”
“There’s nothing to apologize for. You’ve been through a lot. It’s going to take a long time to get past what’s been done to you. You need to be patient with yourself.”
I still don’t understand why Vasily is being so kind to me or why he chose to take on the burden of getting me out of there and keeping me safe.
I may not be able to make sense of it, but that doesn’t stop me from being grateful.
He keeps stroking my hair, and it’s so soothing that my eyes start to drift shut.
Even though he’s a gorgeous man with a body that every woman’s eye is drawn to, there’s nothing overly sexual about this touch.
He’s not trying to get me undressed or force his way into me.
He’s just holding me, making me feel safe, and letting me know that I can trust him.
Because as strange as it is, I do trust him.
When I feel his body move, I tighten my arms around him. “Please not yet. Will you stay until I fall back asleep?”
He kisses the top of my head. “Da,” he says, and I smile against his chest.
“I know that means yes,” I tell him.
Picking me up and sitting with his back against the headboard, he keeps holding me while getting into a position that’s more comfortable for him.
“Very good. Do you know any other Russian?”
“Just a few words. My Russian lit class is my favorite class. We were reading Anna Karenina before I had to leave.”
“One of my favorites. What do you want a degree in?”
I let out a soft laugh. “I still haven’t narrowed it down yet. I really love my lit classes, but I’m not so sure you can make a living off studying literature and reading books, at least not easily, and teaching jobs are damn hard to get.”
He keeps running his fingers through my hair, and I relax even more into his touch, listening to the steady beat of his heart against my ear.
Finally, he asks, “Why did you have to leave your university?”
I sigh and fidget with his shirt. “My dad made me.” Before he can ask me anything else, I beat him by asking, “So you’re a Bratva boss? What’s that like?”
He gives a soft, deep laugh, and I smile when I feel the vibrations against my face. “It’s never boring.”
“How long have you been in America?”
“Just a few weeks.”
I don’t know much about mafias, and I have no clue how a Bratva is run, but there’s one thing I have to know. “Do you own places like Ruby’s? Are you a part of that kind of thing?”
He waits a few seconds, and when he answers me, his voice is calm and slow, like he’s choosing his words very carefully.
“A lot of Bratvas are involved in sex trafficking. I saw it all the time in Russia, but I’ve never been a part of it.
I can turn a blind eye to many things, Nina.
I’m not what most people would consider a good man, but I despise rape.
I do own a couple of strip clubs in town because it’s a very easy way to make a shit ton of money, but I can promise you those dancers want to be there. They’re free to leave at any time.”
I think about what he’s said, and although I’m not crazy about strip clubs, I realize there’s a huge difference between women choosing to take their clothes off and being forced to.
“How’s your arm feeling?” he asks, gently changing the subject.
“It’s okay, just a little sore.”
“I’m sorry I had to make you get it. If it wasn’t so important, I wouldn’t have done it. I hope you know that.”
“I understand. It is kind of funny, though. I’ve always been such a rule follower, and now I’m an honorary member of a dangerous Bratva.”
Vasily laughs again, still stroking my hair, and it’s quickly become my new favorite thing. “Don’t worry, your honorary status won’t require you to do anything.”
“That’s good. These last ten days have proven that I’m not very tough.”
“I disagree,” he murmurs against my head. “The woman I met in that shitty hallway showed tremendous strength.”
“I nearly passed out and then begged you for help. That’s hardly heroic.”
“It took a lot of courage to do that, Nina. Don’t downplay what you did.”
I fist his shirt, feeling my throat start to tighten as unwanted memories come rushing in. “I didn’t fight hard enough,” I whisper too low for him to hear.
“What?” he asks, leaning his head closer to mine so he can hear me.
“I didn’t fight hard enough,” I repeat, feeling my body start to shake. “I should’ve fought harder, should’ve begged more, anything.”
“No, Nina.”
The pain in his voice surprises me enough to make me lift my head so I can see him. He gently cups my face, brushing aside the tears with his thumbs. It’s too dark for me to see the sharp blue of his eyes, but the intensity in them is easy to see.
“You did nothing wrong. I know you’re thinking up a million different things that you should’ve or could’ve done, but I’m telling you there isn’t a damn thing you could’ve done to stop what happened to you.
You couldn’t have fought them off, and if you had managed it, they would’ve just tied you to the damn bed.
You were never going to win, Nina. It’s designed so you lose every time. ”
Deep down I know he’s right, but what-ifs still run through my head. “He did tie me to the bed,” I whisper, clutching his wrists.
“Who did?”
“The first man, he came back again. He’s the one I was leaving when I saw you.”
“He did this to your lip, too?”
“Yes.”
“And the bruises on your thighs?”
I start to pull away, but he keeps his hands on my face and quickly says, “I just saw them as I was putting you into the bed to sleep. Your skirt rode up a bit. I didn’t undress you, Nina. I would never do that to you.”
I soften into his touch again. “He did some of them, but they’re all rough there. They’re monsters. I had no idea people could be so cruel.”
“I’m very sorry you had to find out this way.” He pulls me back against him and goes back to stroking my hair. “Do you know the men who did this?”
“No. The first man wore a ski mask both times. The others showed their faces, but I don’t know their names. I’ve never seen any of them before.”
He’s quiet for a long time before asking, “Do you need me to get in touch with your family? Your mom or dad?”
“No,” I quickly say and tighten my grip on his shirt again. “I never want to see them again.”
I know he wants to ask me more questions, but when I yawn, he kisses the top of my head and relaxes back against the headboard. “Try to sleep, Nina. You’ve been through a lot and need your rest.”
“Please don’t go. I know I’m being selfish and that you’re probably uncomfortable, and I’m so sorry that this is nothing like the wedding night you imagined yourself having, but please don’t leave me alone.”
“I’m very comfortable, actually, and I never imagined myself having a wedding night, so you’re not competing against anything. I promise I won’t leave you alone.”
I nod against his chest and whisper a thank you.
He keeps stroking my hair, lulling me to sleep with his gentle touch and the comforting beat of his heart.
My wedding ring feels strange on my finger, and I keep thinking about how he’d taken the time to get one of his men to buy us rings.
He didn’t have to risk himself to get me away from Ruby’s, he sure as hell didn’t have to marry me, and the fact that he did all that and still thought to send someone out for rings confuses the hell out of me.
Everyone calls him a devil, but he’s been nothing but kind to me.
I fall asleep easily in his arms, and it’s the first time I’m not plagued by nightmares.
It’s a deep, dark sleep, and when I wake, the first thing I notice is the beat of his heart thumping steadily in my ear and something very heavy pressed against the back of my legs.
I start to lift my head, but Vasily tightens his hold on me and says, “It’s just Ruslan. He doesn’t like to sleep alone.”