Chapter 27 #2
“I never doubted his honesty, this is why I am even more grateful to him. That he took the trouble to see the worthiness of a black woman, who has no family and does not even know her father. The only men who visited Lady Sedgewick were Lord Barrington and his friends. I was rarely in their company, but I never received even a greeting from any of them.”
“I am so deeply sorry, my dear. Cece? You never told me how Lord Barrington acted when he demanded you leave. Did he hurt you?”
“Dear Elizabeth, let us not speak of the past again. I left as he demanded, without any confrontation. We should do better to return to Mr. Darcy. He, and Mr. Bingley and Colonel Fitzwilliam—not to mention your father and your uncle—are among the best of men.”
“Indeed they are. But at times, even the best of men might behave in a way that is easily misjudged.
Kindness might easily be seen as preference and friendship as admiration.
Mr. Darcy himself used to say that a lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony, in a moment.”
Cece smiled. “Did he say that to you?”
“Oh no, at that time our conversations were scarce. I heard him saying so to Mr. Bingley’s sister, one day when they walked in the Netherfield garden. They did not notice me and I do not know how such a subject arose, I only overheard the end of it.”
“Mr. Darcy might be correct,” Cece replied, amused. “I would not know, as I have rarely been in company with either ladies or gentlemen until recently.”
They took a few more steps. It was already dark; the moon and stars brightened the night and were mirrored in the water. The cottage was in their sight and suddenly Elizabeth took off her shoes and stepped into the water. Cece watched her with astonishment then followed her lead.
“This is so exciting! And cold! But so pleasant! Your actions still surprise me, Elizabeth,” Cece said.
“It is rather shocking to see a widow in mourning walking barefoot in the water, is it not?”
“I could not say; as I mentioned, until recently I have rarely been in company,” Cece jested and Elizabeth laughed.
“I enjoy hearing you laugh, Elizabeth.”
“It is a pleasant feeling...to laugh...and to walk in the water.”
“True!” Another short pause followed, then Cece continued.
“Elizabeth, please tell me...We both know that the word matrimony should be forever strange to me. But are you concerned that I might have misjudged Mr. Darcy’s friendliness? That I am such a simpleton as to interpret his kindness as more than he intends?”
“You are certainly not a simpleton, Cece. And I hope you know I wish you as much happiness as I wish to my sisters.”
“I can see you avoided the answer, so allow me to put you at ease. I very much admire Mr. Darcy and being in his company is a joy and an honour. But I have never desired him to kiss me or to touch me and I am sure neither has he!”
“Cece!!!” Elizabeth cried, in a reprimanding and genuinely astounded voice. She would not have expected such a reply even from Lydia.
Cece began to laugh, but Elizabeth’s frown stopped her.
“Elizabeth, I sincerely apologise, and I beg you to not take my liberty as an offence or lack of respect. Lady Sedgewick was quite partial to such discussions and I felt it would express my sentiments quite accurately. Again, please forgive me.”
A broad smile twisted Elizabeth’s lips. “Well, your response was unexpected but very eloquent. Come, let us return, we are both wet and cold, we cannot afford to become ill.”
They walked back to the cottage and Cece continued the conversation.
“Elizabeth, please tell me if I am taking too many liberties in addressing you. Regarding Mr. Darcy—have I behaved improperly? Did I do something wrong? Please tell me! I know I am being offered more than I should expect and I most certainly know my place.”
“Cece, I do not believe you do know your place. If you did, you would know how fond of you I am and you would not speak of taking too many liberties. As for Mr. Darcy—I know both he and Miss Darcy enjoy your company exceedingly. I never thought that you would not ‘know your place’. Any man—even one in Mr. Darcy’s situation in life—would have enough reasons to admire and love you. ”
“I am relieved to hear you say that. I do worry at times, as so much has changed in my life in less than two months.”
“My entire life has changed several times in less than five months. We are all still adjusting to the new circumstances. I find comfort in your friendship, never doubt that.”
“Thank you, Elizabeth...As for Mr. Darcy—it is quite obvious where his mind and his heart are engaged. I trust you are aware that there is only one object of his interest.”
Elizabeth tried to answer when she heard Jane calling her.
“Lizzy dear, what have you done? You are both wet. Are you well?”
“Very well indeed; we ventured into the sea and we must hurry to change. Did you have a pleasant evening?”
“Very much so. We called on Colonel Forster and they were hosting a party. We remained but a short time, as we preferred a ride around the town. Lydia and Kitty will join us here tomorrow, as soon as they wake up. The colonel promised to send them in his carriage.”
“Very well. I prefer to have them both here.”
“Lizzy? Mr. Wickham was there too. He asked about you. He was very interested to know how you are.”
“I am not interested at all to know how he is. Now please excuse me, I am quite tired. It has been a long day.”
Alone in her room, Elizabeth mused over her conversation with Cece until after midnight.
She felt relieved but still restless as she thought of Darcy.
Ready to fight for the injustices around her, she was not brave enough to examine her desires and to make any plans for her life.
Of her feelings, she had already become certain.
Slowly, tiredness defeated her.
Through the open window, the chill breeze, the smell of the sea and the sound of the waves enveloped her and finally offered her a well-deserved rest.