17. Chapter 17
Chapter 17
“I’m really fucking confused,” Evan muttered, looking down at the new mattress he’d just helped David move into the loft, then at the identical one they were about to remove. “What’s wrong with this mattress?”
“I’ve had sex with Ashley on it,” David answered matter-of-factly.
“And? Is it extremely dirty, or something? Because if that’s the case, then you need to find someone else to help you, because I’m not touching it.”
“That’s not it.”
“Then what is it?”
David paused for a moment, before saying, “It’s just a non-starter.”
“A non-starter for who?” Evan frowned, only to have his expression almost immediately clear. “Oh. A non-starter for Cat Lady?”
“Don’t call her Cat Lady.”
“What should I call her, then? I don’t know her name.”
“And you’re not going to.”
“Okay, well, until I know her name, she’s going to be ‘Cat Lady’. If you don’t like it, tell me her name. It’s that simple.”
David gave him a long look, remaining silent.
Evan rolled his eyes. “It’s for Cat Lady, right?”
“No comment.”
“She doesn’t want to fuck around on a used bed, I take it?”
“No comment.”
“She doesn’t,” Evan surmised. “So, did she ask you to buy a new bed? Because that seems like a bold request, given you’ve only been ‘seeing’ each other casually for a few weeks.”
“No comment.”
“Or was it your idea to buy a new bed?”
“No. Comment.”
“It must be your idea. You’re buying a new bed for Cat Lady. Just … wow.”
“Can you just shut the fuck up and help me move this?”
“Would it kill your ass to answer a question or two? I’m spending half a day moving a bed for you. Make that two beds.”
“God, you bitch a lot.”
“That’s because I have to help you move a lot of shit. How many times have you returned the favor? Oh, that’s right. Never.”
“That’s because you’ve never had to move shit,” David pointed out before adding, “Christ. I’ll buy you dinner, all right?”
Evan wasn’t completely appeased. “Yeah, you will. And I want a steak. An expensive one.”
“Fine.”
“Fine,” Evan mimicked, doing a spot-on imitation of David’s annoyed tone. “Jesus, I hope Cat Lady’s worth it.”