Chapter Thirty-three Beckett
Chapter Thirty-three
Beckett
WITH MY EYES OPEN
Performed by Lonestar
ONE YEAR AGO
HIM: The way you move on Titan is a bit of a miracle. Beautiful. The art of a goddess coming alive right before our mortal eyes.
HER: I’m not sure how to respond to that.
HIM: No need. I just wanted you to hear it. You’ve always been beautiful, Maise, but seeing you with your horse is something really special.
HER: *** eyeroll emoji *** We both know I haven’t always been beautiful, but I will concede that Titan and I put on a good show.
HIM: What will it take for you to realize the image you had of yourself as a kid was not how the world saw you?
HER: I’m not getting into this with you. I’m happy with who I am, but we both know how the world saw me.
HIM: *** a series of pictures of a much younger Maisey, laughing at the lake, pirouetting on horseback, and swinging in a tire swing, hair flung out around her ***
HIM: Look at those and tell me you don’t see a beautiful girl with light pouring out of her. As much as I don’t want love for me, I hope you find it, and that whoever the man is takes his job seriously and reminds you every single fucking day how stunning you are.
PRESENT DAY
When Wylee left, fury followed Maisey to the restroom as she went to change into her show outfit.
And while I was glad to see something more on her face than a blank mask, I loathed the reason for it, detested that Chelsea was once again chipping at Maisey’s happiness.
She’d wrought a lifetime of trauma on Maisey, for what?
Jealousy? Rivalry? Money? The anger I’d barely tamed yesterday returned, simmering into a burning rage.
I was tempted to storm out of the barn, go find her sister myself, and end this by strangling Chelsea.
But if I left Maisey to go find Chelsea, and we were wrong about who this was, I would have left my girl unprotected.
I had no intention of doing that until I had no other options.
So as little faith as I had in them at the moment, I had to hope Wylee and his team would do their job, find Chelsea, and bring this chapter of our lives to a close so we could focus on our future.
I was still wading through those thoughts and emotions when Maisey came out of the bathroom. And as soon as my gaze settled on her, every single thought left my brain except one—she was stunning.
The body-fitting outfit showed off all her delightful curves while covering her from head to toe in red.
The material was cut in crisscrossing slashes, varying in texture from glittery sequins to smooth silk.
The tank-style top left her arms bare, but she wore sparkling red cuffs from wrist to almost elbow.
The soft-soled shoes she wore while performing blended in with the rest of the outfit.
She’d tied her hair back in two long, intricate braids woven with the same ribbons she’d used in Titan’s mane.
She looked like a superhero.
And I knew from experience that watching Maisey perform on Titan would spark the same awe as seeing Wonder Woman whirl her lasso or flick bullets off her bracelets.
Before I realized what I was doing, I’d closed the distance, put my hands on her waist, backed her up against Titan’s stall door, and planted my mouth on hers.
The kiss wasn’t sweet. It wasn’t the devotion I’d tried to convey last night.
It was a furious passion fueled by the anger the morning had wrought.
It tore at my soul, knowing we’d given Chelsea the power to touch us here. To impact our embrace. But the longer the kiss went, the more I felt the essence of us take back over.
Maisey’s sweetness and strength would always be more powerful than her sister’s bitter hate.
By the time Fallon’s chuckle came from behind us, we’d found our center again. It allowed me to focus on the simple truth of me and Maisey and our love.
And when I stepped back and saw Maisey’s face flushed, not with fury but with that soft, sated smile she wore whenever I touched her, everything felt like it was going to be okay.
Her sister would be found. This would be over. And I’d forever have Maisey at my side.
“The schedule we made has you up first, but we can swap spots if you think you need a few more minutes here.” Fallon’s voice was full of humor.
I turned to see Fallon wasn’t in a fancy trick-riding outfit like Maisey wore. She was in more sedate, typical western wear, which meant she wouldn’t be doing the same level of tricks my Maisey-girl would be—at least not today.
“No need. I’m ready now,” Maisey said. She shot me an impish smile that both relieved me after the hurt and anger I’d seen minutes before and made me want to pull her back into my arms and kiss her senseless.
Maisey led Titan out of the barn with Fallon and me following her.
Just like Wylee had promised, Cleaver had shown up, and he tipped his hat in our direction as he took up a post near the barn.
From his position, he could see the entire corral and the packed bleachers on the far side.
The quiet hum of voices filled the air, anticipation building as they waited for the show to start.
At the entrance to the corral, Maisey tossed herself up onto Titan’s back and then looked down at me with that soft smile I adored. The one I liked to believe was just for me. “Wish me luck.”
“No luck needed, darlin’. You’re going to knock everyone’s socks off.”
The light in her eyes grew, the hurt and anger diminishing yet again, and the tension in my heart eased. Maisey headed into the ring, halting Titan just inside the gate while Teddy played emcee and welcomed everyone to the ranch.
“I have to get ready,” Fallon said, worry creasing her forehead as she watched Maisey. “Just tell me she’s holding up.”
“She’s holding up.” When she turned to me, giving me a look full of doubt, I did my best to reassure her. “Really, Fallon. You know our girl is one of the strongest humans on this planet.”
“I don’t want her to have to be. She’s been through enough.”
I nodded as a ball wedged itself into my throat again. After another beat, Fallon whirled around and headed back to the barn to get her horse ready for their act.
I leaned up against the rail, taking in a deep breath.
Yesterday’s storm had finally blown itself out in the evening, heading over the mountains and cleaning the summer dust from the air, but puddles and humidity remained in its wake.
The damp mingled with the scent of pine and redwoods. Scents I loved in a place I loved.
But I loved Maisey more than any of it. I may have denied it for twenty years, but she’d always been the center of my world. The grounding force. The most important reason why I’d stayed in Rivers when I could have gotten a job in a department just about anywhere.
Teddy finally announced Maisey, and I watched as she and Titan rounded the ring in a warm-up circuit.
Graceful…moving smoothly together from years of practice.
As they went by me, Maisey shifted up from her seat to a standing position before literally falling in a fluid, dance-like move so her feet were all that remained on the horse.
The rest of her body was stuck straight out from Titan’s flank, and as they rounded the corner, her hand brushed the dirt where she picked up a sparkling red lasso she’d left on the ground.
The audience oohed and aahed and clapped.
As Maisey rolled up onto Titan’s back, danced to her toes, and swirled the lasso in the air, a body leaned up next to me, elbows rubbing against mine.
“She looks good up there,” Dad said.
I shot him a quick glance, noting he was wearing his good hat today and his best shirt with the pearl buttons, before my focus returned to Maisey.
She was a fiery star like this, but even when she wasn’t performing, she was a bright flame in the dark of night.
A blaze I would always seek. A flare I wanted to fan and watch grow until it illuminated the entire town with its brilliance.
A year ago, I’d been watching her do a similar performance, and I’d been struck by how magnificent she was.
I’d texted her afterward and told her just that, and she’d brushed the compliment off, but I also remembered telling her she deserved to have a guy in her life reminding her every day of just how stunning she was.
How beautiful—inside and out. And I remembered the twinge I’d felt in my chest at the idea of some unknown man being the one to tell her all of the things I wanted her to believe about herself.
Why hadn’t I realized then that I wanted to be that man?
That I wanted to give her everything she dreamed… I’d wasted a year.
No, I’d wasted more than that. Dozens of years.
But I couldn’t continue to beat myself up forever.
If I did, that bitterness would leak into us like it had leaked into Chelsea.
So I’d simply do what I should have always done.
I’d shower Maisey with compliments and love and adoration.
And if and when one of us passed, we’d have all these moments we’d made together to hold us up until we found each other again in whatever afterlife followed this one.
“I’d say I was surprised to see her out there after losing her dad, but then our Maisey-girl has never wanted to let anyone down, has she?” Dad asked as we both watched Maisey execute another flip, this time under and around Titan’s barrel, perfectly.
I looked behind me at Cleaver, who at least seemed to be taking his post seriously, and then leaned in to Dad so I could keep my voice as low as possible. “He’s not dead. We’re just letting everyone believe that until we can catch the person responsible.”
Dad’s thick brows went up, meeting the brim of his hat. “You know who it is?”