Chapter 52
CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO
Eloise
“That was Berk.” Astrid rests her phone against her chest. “What is it about his voice that makes me feel so… complete?”
Stevie looks at Saylor. “That’s how we will be one day.”
“Nope.” Saylor hugs the stuffed walrus she brought with her.
She gave Stevie a walrus charm that she’s since placed on a silver chain around her neck. It’s a perfect complement to the bracelet her parents gifted her with that she rarely takes off.
“It’ll be me when I’m thirty.” Stevie shrugs. “I put it in my life plan, so I need to follow it through.”
“Okay.” Saylor nods. “I’ll say that about a boy when I’m thirty.”
I scratch the back of my neck and look at my cousin. “How’s Berk?”
That’s a very roundabout way of asking if he mentioned Gaines. I’m pacing myself, though. I can ask about Berk’s cousin after I test the waters with a few more questions about Astrid’s husband.
“This is funny.” She looks toward where Penny is sitting next to the kitchen island.
“What’s funny?” I ask.
“Daxton and his folks are at Atlas 22, too.”
At least I know where to find Dr. Morgan. That’s if I wanted to find him. I don’t. I’m more interested in the fact that he’s not home.
“They’re having champagne.” Astrid goes on, “Berk said they haven’t ordered dinner yet, so I don’t think Daddy will be home to read you a story.”
Stevie glances at the clock on the kitchen wall. “Bedtime is soon.”
Mine isn’t. I still have plenty of things planned for tonight, including breaking and entering, although I suppose it’s not classified as that when you have the key code to the apartment you want to enter.
“Is everyone still full from dinner?” Astrid asks the room.
She prepared spaghetti sauce with meatballs and garlic toast. A garden salad accompanied it, and I’m not sure how she managed it, but the carrots were cut into different shapes that resembled bunny ears and hearts.
“I’m stuffed.” Saylor taps her stomach beneath the cute pink top she’s wearing. “What about you, Stevie?”
Stevie smiles. “I’m full to here.”
She cuts a line across her forehead with her hand.
That sends Saylor into a giggle fit.
“I think I need to get someone back to her brother’s apartment so she can shut her eyes.” Penny stands. “Dinner was awesome, Astrid. Thank you for doing this.”
Astrid rounds the island to take Penny in her arms. “Thank you for starting work next week. I had no idea Castle would want to leave that soon.”
“I’m so happy to do that.” Penny looks my way. “Do you want to share an Uber, Els? We can drop you off first.”
“I need to make a stop before I go home.” I move to stand, but a sudden burst of dizziness hits me. It sends me back to my chair.
I barely ate dinner. It’s been the story of my life since Gaines said goodbye to me that day in his apartment. I felt the shift in him before he walked away, and my world has felt off its axis since then.
“I’ll get you a glass of water.” Astrid rushes toward the sink.
I try to stand again with greater success. “I’m fine. All knitting and no eating or sleeping is not a great combination.”
“It’s not,” Penny agrees. “Promise me that once you run your errand, you’ll go straight home to bed.”
I raise my hand as though I’m taking a vow. “I promise.”
The girls say goodbye to each other with hugs. I share one with everyone in the room and grab my tote to take off.
Astrid stops me just as I’m about to leave the room. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
I look into her eyes. “I’m fine.”
She studies my face. “If you’re not, you can talk to me.”
“I got a little dizzy when I stood up,” I tell her honestly. “I need to eat better, sleep more, and laugh a little.”
I need to move forward with my life because Gaines has. He’s out drinking champagne and having dinner at a nice restaurant.
“Do all those things starting now, Eloise.”
I adjust one of the buttons on the cardigan she’s wearing. “I will.”
Playfully, she tugs on one of the big red buttons on my white sweater. “Good.”
I crack open my poetry book to page forty-two. I can’t read the poem that’s printed there. I may never be able to do that again.
The poem is a sweet promise to a lover. It encompasses everything I felt for Gaines. The hope for the future. The vow to never look back.
A tear streams down my face to dot the center of the page.
I don’t try to wipe it away because it’s fitting. It’s a reminder of loving and losing.
I glance down at his bedside table. That’s where I found the book beside my broken diamond bracelet. It’s on top of a small blue velvet sack. I pick it up, noticing the clasp has been repaired.
I should send Gaines a text message thanking him for that, but I can’t. Not yet, at least.
I know I’ll cross his path again at a family gathering, but I’m hoping by then, my courage will have returned, and I’ll possess the strength I thought I once had.
I sit briefly to wrap the bracelet around my wrist. I push on the clasp, and it snaps into place.
When I stand, my chest tightens. It’s not enough to stop me, though. I won’t let a broken heart destroy me.
I place the business card Gaines gave me with his key code on the nightstand, and I walk out of his home and his life.