Chapter 18 Zach
Zach
It had been super decent of Colton to make Zach tea, but he had a hard time drinking it. Now he searched the cupboards as discreetly as possible. There had to be a teapot somewhere. Hell, even his grandpa had one and they were a traveling show.
“Honey?” Colton didn’t glance up from chopping onions. “What are you hunting?”
He hated lying, but he didn’t want to embarrass Colton either. “Nothing. Just seeing what’s where.”
Shifting some bowls and a glass measuring cup, he found his prize. That far back, he was sure it hadn’t been used any year recent, and certainly not to make his tea. He moved it closer, shut the cabinet door, and retrieved the kettle. “Do you mind if I make some more tea?”
“Why don’t you heat up what’s in the kettle?”
Heat up what’s…? He pried open the lid. Two slightly singed tea bags rested on the bottom. The picture came into focus. Emptying the liquid, he searched for the trash to toss out the tea leaves.
“It doesn’t taste good.” Zach froze and rushed to add, “Reheated. Tea doesn’t taste good reheated.”
“That’s how I feel about coffee. The tea bags are in the cabinet to the left of the stove.”
Zach exhaled and finished cleaning the kettle.
Colton cut potatoes into slices, then rebuilt them with a pat of butter and a slice of onion between each one. Then he salted and peppered and wrapped them in foil. “I’m going to put the potatoes out on the grill. They take longer than the bird will. Nanette sent over cucumber salad and cobbler.”
“Cobbler?”
“Yeah, huckleberry? You like that? It’s my favorite.” Colton backed out of the house and started fiddling with the grill.
Real food cooked on a grill? Homemade salad and pie? It felt like Zach had an ordinary life. Colton didn’t seem fazed. This was his normal. Well, grilling at least. He seemed more at home out there than he did in the actual kitchen. He certainly didn’t know how to make a cup of tea.
A warm, fuzzy wave of bubbly feeling rumbled through Zach. It didn’t matter that the tea was awful. Colton had done it for Zach.
Habit kicked in, and he clamped down on his hopes. Then he spied the thick sheaf of papers sitting on the table.
He rinsed the teapot and set it to dry. Outside, Colton smiled as he ran a wire brush across the grill top. Smoke wafted up, but he kept scrubbing. Funny how someone could be so happy making supper.
Maybe he’d stick around. Colton seemed interested enough, and if the lawyer hadn’t lied, Zach had enough money to take care of himself while he figured out what to do next. He’d need to get some equipment, but he could start a YouTube channel. Keith Douglas had one, why not him?
The kettle whistled, and he snapped to the present. Carefully holding the strings of the tea bags, Zach filled the teapot. He slid the lid on so the ends didn’t fall in.
“I messed up your tea, didn’t I?”
Colton stood less than two feet away, his lips twisted in a frown. Stepping closer, Zach looked him in the eye. “No. It was perfect.”
He threw his arms around Colton’s waist and rested his head on the broad chest. When Colton hugged him back, Zach’s dick refused to stay down.
“You don’t need to lie. I’m not gonna cry.”
He held on longer than he should, but he felt safe and didn’t want to lose that. Finally, he let go and stepped back.
“No one’s ever made me tea before.” He ran his hand down Colton’s chest. “Like I said. Perfect.”
Colton blushed, and Zach hated himself. He had to stop tempting Colton.
“Well, I swear, the chicken and taters will taste good. These are my favorite kind of potatoes, you know? My people call them Gawky potatoes—my mom’s mom, she called her granddaddy “Gawky” when she was little, and they were his favorite. True story.”
Colton had this wild web of family, this crazy group of people who he was connected to and who loved him, and it didn’t matter if they all got along. It was wonderful and confusing, all at once. “Gawky potatoes? That’s….”
“Crazy, I know, but that’s us. We’re a wild bunch—sheriff uncle, Daddy in prison doing a life sentence, ranchers and bikers, saddle makers and computer guys. Hell, I have a cousin on Daddy’s side that works at NASA, believe it or not.”
Zach felt cheated. His normal was a trailer, or a tent.
It was playing hours a day where people leered at him or worse.
Normal for Zach had been four assholes and one semi-decent kid who hadn’t the slightest interest in doing anything fun with him.
Well, maybe Ashton would have if he wasn’t so cowed by the others.
He wanted to curse his grandfather, but now he knew what broke him. It probably was his own fault—no one forced him to launder money—but Zach wanted to hear his side of it before he cursed the only family he knew.
“I’m sorry,” Colton said.
Zach realized he’d never responded after Colton shared things about himself. “For what? I’m the one lost in his head. Sound like quite a family you have. You’re lucky.”
“Here I am rattling on about family, and you just lost your last bit.”
Colton held his hands out slightly, and Zach told his conscience to fuck off for an hour. He stepped closer and accepted another hug that he needed more than air.
“Don’t be. I love hearing all about them.” He closed his eyes and imagined it was real. That they were a them. “Something tells me I have more family somewhere. Not siblings or anything, but I’m going to ask Mr. Lee to find them for me.”
“Yeah?” Colton sounded more excited about it than Zach. “Good on you. That’s a great idea.”
He burrowed in a little tighter. “Is this okay? I feel like I’m making you break the rules by asking for hugs all the time.”
“Whatever for? Shit, you know I—well, I hope you know—I care about you. You need a hug, I have them to give.” Colton gave him a warm grin. “And if I happen to spring wood, you won’t think badly of me. I’m trying not to, but it’s hard.”
Colton kept a straight face for about as long as Zach did, then they were laughing.
It wasn’t that funny, but it released a lot of tension they’d bottled up the last few days.
There hadn’t been many times he could be so loud.
Someone was always listening and judging.
With Colton he could be alive. “If you didn’t notice me, I didn’t notice you. ”
Colton kept smiling at him. “Well, I might have noticed something. But officially, I have to deny any and all knowledge of such a thing.
If the world didn’t hate Zach, they’d be allowed to kiss right then. “Will I ever be able to ask you for a date?”
“Do you really want to? I’m just a small-county deputy. There’s a million other guys like me. You're—well, shit, you’re one of them bright stars that people can see through the clouds.”
Another little piece of him broke at how little Colton thought he was worth.
“People celebrate things like fiddle-playing and bull riding, but you’re the most special of us all, Colt.
You’re this wonderful person, who treats everyone like they matter, and thinks it’s the most normal thing.
It’s not, but that’s how you were raised.
“I’ll bet I’ve had more people come on to me than you, and not one of them wanted Zachariah Baxter. I’m not better than you, Colt, not even close. People see me as a poor, dumb kid they can have if they grease the right wheels. None of them were as good as you. Not one.”
He smiled at Colton, because otherwise he’d cry. “Don’t ever think you don’t deserve something special. You do. Because you’re the best man I know.”
They stared at each other, neither moving; Colton because he was decent and Zach because he was trying to be.
Finally, Colton blinked a pair of watery eyes. “Remember I said this. What you said, that hit me here. ” He tapped his heart. “As soon as I’m allowed, I am going to kiss you for that so hard. Whatever happens after that happens. Thank you, Zach.”
Colton nodded and went back outside.
Zach stared at him even after the door closed. Finally he tore his gaze away, and poured his tea. After one sip, he set the cup down.
“Not near as perfect as yours.”