Chapter 23 #2
She traced her finger down the buttons of my shirt. “I’m just curious.”
“My assistant brought over two racks’ worth. I chose what I liked, and that’s what’s hanging in the closet.”
Her head shook. “That’s far more involved than I thought. I just … didn’t know how all this worked. If you actually went to the store. If someone sent things over. I have a lot to learn about this world, Chef.” She tapped my chest. “Your world, I mean.”
“I know it’s your body”—I gripped her even tighter—“but it’s also very much mine, and I want to be heavily involved in what covers it.” I reached into my sports coat and pulled out a black velvet box. “Same is true for this.”
Her eyes went wide. “Walker, why are you handing me a box that looks like it may have jewelry in it? When I’m already dripping in jewelry that you bought me.”
“It’s something else I picked out for you. Open it.”
She shook her head so hard that hair fell into her face.
“Open it, Alivia.”
Reluctantly, she took it from my hands and slowly lifted the lid, tears instantly welling in her eyes. “You didn’t …” she whispered.
I stopped both sides from dripping by running my thumbs under her eyes.
“I noticed you hadn’t bought one, as I’d instructed you to, so I took the liberty of buying one myself.
” I pulled the Rolex out of the box and clasped it around her delicate wrist. I’d thought hard about the style that would look best on her arm and chosen one made of Oystersteel and white gold, with a white dial.
“I always want you to be able to track the time in the kitchen. Now, when you do, you’ll think of me. ”
“But a Rolex?” Another wave of emotion was coming in fast, and I reached to prevent those drips as well.
“This is too much, Walker. And honestly, I don’t even know if too much accurately describes what this is—because I’ve only heard of the brand.
I’ve never seen one in person, but I’m guessing it’s more than the stopwatch I planned on buying whenever I had time to take my ass to a store. ”
I chuckled. “It’s a bit extra—I won’t lie. But remember, Alivia, I’m a big guy. I don’t do things on a small scale.”
“It’s stunning. Beyond words kinda stunning.” She circled her arms around my neck. “I don’t know how to thank you. For this, for the clothes, for the bags and shoes and jewelry and makeup. For whatever you have planned for tonight.” She leaned in closer. “For literally everything.”
“You can kiss me. That’ll be enough.”
“But the lip gloss is so sparkly that you’ll be covered.”
I positioned my mouth in front of hers. “Make me fucking sparkle, then.”
“I’m so full.” Alivia rested her arms on the table that had just been cleared in between courses, so the only thing in front of her was a charger. “I can’t believe we have four more courses to go. I’m going to need to lie down.” She laughed. “I’m shocked this fabulous room doesn’t have a couch.”
“Would you like one?” I smiled. “I can make that happen.”
She turned her face to the side, as though she was getting reacquainted with the private room I’d reserved for the evening in a restaurant in San Diego, owned by one of my favorite chefs.
Candles flickered on every available surface, including the floor.
Vases, full of flowers, had been brought in and positioned around the table to make the space even more intimate.
The instructions I’d sent to the chef’s assistant had been well executed, and I was pleased with the result.
“Is there anything out of the realm of possibility?” Her gaze returned to me. “Anything that’s out of reach for you?”
“No.”
She licked her lips. “You can quite literally have anything and everything you want?”
“In a physical sense, yes.” I leaned back in my chair, bringing the tumbler of whiskey with me.
A bourbon that had been recommended by the chef to pair with tonight’s courses.
I was sipping for flavor, nothing else. “But I want you to remember who I was when we met. And who I still am. Just because I can have it all at my fingertips, it doesn’t make me a happy man. ”
“Walker …” Her voice turned so soft. “I’m looking at happiness right now.”
“That’s because you’re sitting across from me.”
She reached across the table, and I linked our fingers. “I need to be vulnerable for a second and say things that I’m afraid to put in the universe.” She took a breath. “That’s why I’ve been keeping them in.”
“Say them, Alivia. Always say them.”
She looked at our hands. “You know earlier, how I told you I have a lot to learn about your world?”
I nodded as she glanced up.
“I’ve been thinking about that lately. The differences in our worlds. And if I’m totally being honest, I’m worried you’re going to find those distances to be too great.”
“Stop.”
“No, I’m serious, Walker. You’re from a league they make movies about.
Like you’re the main character in those flicks because your life is so glamorous and over the top and unlike anyone could ever fathom.
” She went silent. “I can’t compete with that.
I can’t even afford to fill your gas tank until my next paycheck.
Never mind the fact that you have at least six cars in your garage—at least from what I saw, so there could be more. ”
I’d wondered if she was ever going to bring this up. The way her eyes widened each time I made a financial move had told me she was overwhelmed.
But I was putting my hand over the knob of the burner before she could even turn it on.
“Listen to me, Alivia. I want you. I want us. I want someone who’s going to make me laugh so fucking hard and make me smile and drive me wild in only ways that you can.
” I dragged my tongue across my bottom lip.
“I don’t need you to pay for things. I have money.
I don’t need more of it.” I squeezed her fingers.
“What I need from you is to not feel threatened by this lifestyle. To let me buy things for you because that makes me so fucking happy. And to not bug out when I tell you the things I have planned and the places we’re going to go and the things I’m going to show you. ”
“You mean more than this?” She looked at the nearby flower arrangement like she’d never been given a bouquet.
“What I wanted to do tonight was fly you to New York City. Have you eat at one of the best restaurants in the country. Stay in the penthouse of the Cole and Spade Hotel that overlooks Central Park and fly you back tomorrow.”
She pressed her chest into the edge of the table. “When you say fly … are you telling me you have your pilot’s license?”
“No.” I chuckled. “But I do have a private jet, and that’s the only way we’ll travel.”
“Dear God.” Her eyes went the widest.
“I had a feeling that if I took you on the jet and we went to New York, it might send you into an overwhelming spiral.”
Her brows rose. “Ya think?”
“So, I tempered things down a bit and brought you here.”
“Tempered down?” She shook her head. “Because a Rolex and a dinner in a private room in San Diego that’s decorated like a dream is nothing? Walker, in my eyes, this is everything.”
I knew this was incomprehensible for most. I knew there was nothing normal about the way my family lived. We hadn’t come from this. We had grown this.
But the only way I could explain her future to her without having it feel like it was too much was by showing her little by little.
Tonight was a step.
I needed to know she was willing to take more.
I stroked my thumb across the back of her hand. “This is what my life looks like, and it’s what your life is going to look like. It’s what I come with. And if you want me, Alivia, then you have to accept all of me.” I glanced up and around. “And all of this.”
“I do want you.” She squeezed me. “More than anything.” She bit her bottom lip, hiding a grin that felt extremely devilish. “But if you feed me another course tonight, I really might bust open.”