Chapter 44
AMALIE
The clinic hardly feels like a clinic at all.
It’s more like a hotel, with soft lighting, pale wood floors, and calming art. Private entrance, private elevator. The waiting room has exactly zero other people in it. There’d been no indication in the lobby that there was even a clinic in this tower.
Of course, Roman would choose a place like this, somewhere discreet.
Once more, I’m seated on the edge of the examination table, paper crinkling beneath me. But this time is different because I’m with him. Roman’s seated in the chair in the corner of the room wearing an expression of intense focus, as if he’s about to take the test of his life.
He hasn’t said much since we arrived, which is concerning.
“You alright?” I reach over and touch his shoulder, bringing him back to the moment.
“Fine,” he says. He places his hand on mine, squeezing it in a way I didn’t know I needed. “Just fine. I am… eager.”
Always the master of understatement. I can’t help but smile.
The door opens and Dr. Kovacs walks in. She smiles warmly as she greets us, then flashes me a quick look. “Is everything alright?”
“She was recently in a stressful situation,” Roman answers.
Dr. Kovacs doesn’t flinch at his peculiar phrasing—one of the perks of having a personal doctor who knows all about Bratva life, I suppose.
“I heard about what happened last night at the gala. How awful. Thank God there were no major injuries.” She shakes her head, as if putting it out of her mind. “Anyway, the ultrasound will tell the full story, so let’s not waste another moment.”
She sticks her head out into the hall, and moments later a nurse enters with an ultrasound machine. Dr. Kovacs explains each step of the process as she does them.
Roman takes my hand when the gel hits my skin. It helps.
When Dr. Kovacs puts the wand to my stomach, the ultrasound screen flickers to life. At first, it’s just static. Then, I hear a sound. Fast and rhythmic.
I gasp when I realize what it is.
A heartbeat.
“There we are,” Dr. Kovacs says. “The heartbeat is nice and strong. Exactly what we want to hear.”
The room seems to tilt. I gasp again, one hand flying to my mouth. Tears flow instantly. I had no idea that hearing the heartbeat would feel like this.
Roman’s hand slides from mine, his breath catching. He stares at the screen like he’s witnessing a miracle.
“That’s…” His voice breaks, just a tiny bit.
Dr. Kovacs smiles. “That’s your baby.”
Roman swallows hard. I’ve never seen him like this before. He’s completely undone.
He moves closer to the exam table. Then he leans forward and presses a kiss—gentle, reverent—against my side. Then another. And another. I can’t help but giggle, my heart happy.
He rests his forehead against my thigh, eyes closed. “I hear you, little one. I hear you.”
When he looks up at me, his eyes are sheened with wetness. No tears, but as close as I imagine I’ll ever see from him.
Dr. Kovacs goes through the rest of the process, then gives us a moment alone.
“We keep this our secret,” he says. “At least for now. Until I’m sure no one can touch you.”
I think about my mom and Kyle. Am I really supposed to keep this a secret from my family? I push the matter out of my mind for now, focusing on the baby, on Roman.
“My heart,” he says, his hand on mine. “You gave me my heart twice over.”
Outside the clinic, the world goes on.
But in that room, in that moment, it’s just us.
The three of us.
I don’t tell Roman where I’m going. It feels like a betrayal, but I have to see Kyle.
I slip out while he’s gone for the day and while Sasha is with his private tutors.
A few lies to the guards about a gyno appointment was all it took.
Men tend not to ask too many questions about matters like that.
It kills me to do it, but there’s not a chance in hell I’m going to cut my family out of what’s going on.
Kyle chose a quiet diner for us to meet. It’s near the river in neutral territory. I clock the scene without thinking as I ease my car into a spot. I’m in two different worlds between Kyle and Roman, but both of them require the same attention to possible danger.
I turn off the engine. Is this the kind of life I’m bringing my baby into? Am I going to raise him or her on the battleground between the law and the Bratva with my family on both sides of the war?
With all my mental effort, I push those questions to the side as best I can.
Kyle’s already there when I walk in. He stands up the moment he sees me, relief flashing across his face.
“Hey,” he says, pulling me into a tight hug that’s both tender and protective. He pulls back after a beat, studying my face in the concerned way he used to when I’d had a bad day at school but tried to pretend I was fine. He’s always been good at reading me.
We sit. Coffee arrives. When I don’t touch mine, Kyle’s eyes flick to the mug, noticing.
“You scared the hell out of me,” he says. “After what happened at the gala.”
“I know.” I wrap my fingers around the mug, taking in the warmth. At least I can enjoy that. “That’s actually why I asked to meet.”
His jaw tightens. “That’s cryptic.”
I breathe deeply, exhaling slowly. Once. Twice.
I’d been on the fence about telling Kyle about my pregnancy. But sitting there across from him, knowing how much he cares about me, how much he just wants to keep me safe, and that he’s probably been losing sleep over my situation with Roman, I know what I have to do.
“I have to tell you something.”
He leans in, another concerned expression crossing his features. “What is it?”
“Don’t be mad.”
“Just for the record, telling someone not to be mad is the single worst way to lead into sharing big news.”
Another deep breath. Alright, here goes nothing.
“I’m pregnant.”
At first, he just stares at me. For a second, I wonder if he even heard me. Then he lets out a whoosh of air and laughs a laugh of total disbelief. He rubs his hand over his face and shakes his head. His eyes are lit up with excitement, like he just got the best news of his life.
“Holy shit. You’re serious?”
“Trust me, this isn’t something I’d joke about.”
“Holy shit, Am.”
Tears sting my eyes. “I didn’t plan it. I swear. It just happened.”
He barely hears that. He’s on his feet in a second, helping me out of the booth and pulling me into another hug. “You’re going to be a mom,” he says. “I’m going to be an uncle.”
I half laugh, half sob into his jacket. “You’re not mad?”
His eyes flash like I just asked him a totally insane question.
“Are you kidding? Mad?” He shakes his head.
“Not even a little. I’m freaking thrilled.
Maybe even a bit proud. And definitely excited.
” He lists the emotions as if they’re occurring to him per second.
They probably are. “Oh, and I’m already plotting how to murder anyone who tries to hurt you. ”
“Thank you.” The relief hits me so hard my knees feel weak. After a moment, I say quietly, “It’s Roman’s.”
“Yeah, I figured. I doubt you’d have time for flings on the side while living with a Bratva pakhan.”
“I know what he is. I know what this looks like. But he’s not cruel, if that’s what you’re worried about.” My mind flashes back to last night, to the basement. “At least, not to me. And not to Sasha. He’s protective. And I know that sounds dangerous, but—”
He raises his palm, interrupting me gently as we both sit back down. “I’ve seen dangerous, Am. I know what it looks like. Take a look at my case files sometime. Or, better yet, don’t.”
“So what are you saying?”
Kyle leans back, crosses his arms, and exhales through his nose. Then he looks off to the side in the way he does when he’s thinking something over. He always gives weight to his words—one of the reasons he’s so damn good at what he does.
“He’s dangerous, but he’s not psychotic. Big difference.” Another pause. “What I’m saying is, right now, I want you to stay with him.”
My breath catches. “What?”
I can’t believe what I’m hearing. My cop brother is telling me he wants me to stay with the biggest known criminal in the city.
“I don’t like it,” he adds quickly. “There’s a hell of a lot about this I don’t like, as a matter of fact.
I don’t like who he is, what he stands for, or what he does.
But right now, you’re in the middle of what’s going on.
And he’s your best chance at staying safe.
I’m glad to see you, Am. But you probably shouldn’t have left the house. ”
I look down at my hands, at the curl of steam wafting from the coffee cup.
“I’ll open an investigation,” he says. “Off the books at first, making it formal when I can. I’ll find out who was behind the shooting—if it’s Garin or some other Bratva head. But the fact of the matter is, that fortress of a mansion is the safest place for you right now.”
“And until then?” I ask.
“Until then you stay there. Stay where you’re protected. Don’t lie to me. And don’t do anything reckless to prove you’re strong—I already know you are.”
My throat tightens. “And what about Mom?”
He sighs, shaking his head. “Don’t tell her anything for now. Take advantage of the fact that she’s on the other side of the country. When this is all over, then we’ll give her the good news. And we will be giving her good news.”
He reaches across the table and squeezes my hand. “I don’t love this. But I love you. And that baby?” A small smile tugs at his mouth. “That baby is part of our family now. That’s my niece or nephew, and I’m going to love them like crazy when they show up—no matter who their dad is.”
I nod, tears spilling freely. Kyle hands me a napkin and I dab them away before I start to make a scene. “I’m scared.”
“I know,” he says softly. “I am too. But you’re not alone.”
When we stand to leave, he pulls me into one more warm hug, pressing a kiss to my hair. “We’ll get through this, Am. All of us.”
I want to believe him. I really, really do.