Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
M andy was grateful that she had the restaurant to focus on, because otherwise, she suspected she would have been tempted to crawl back into bed and stay there after dropping the kids at school.
She did give in once, when she wasn’t expected in the restaurant, and spent the entire day lounging on her living room sofa, watching classic sitcoms and romantic comedies and eating the things in her freezer that she usually avoided—mac and cheese and ice cream.
She thought she was all cried out, but it turned out she was wrong and had to buy more boxes of tissues.
She never knew when it was going to hit her and the tears would fall.
Sometimes it was the littlest thing, like once when she was folding laundry and a picture fell off her dresser.
She picked it up, and it was of her and Cory on their wedding day.
They looked so young and in love that the pain of it made her gasp, and she had to sit down.
When she finally calmed down, she stuffed the picture in a drawer so she wouldn’t have to look at it and finished putting the socks away.
Cory called the day after he moved out to let her know where he’d landed.
He’d made one phone call to a local real estate office, and they hooked him up with a stunning, three-bedroom rental in Brant Point, their neighborhood, one of the most desired areas of the island.
He’d said it was on the water and had everything he and the kids needed, so he could keep them on the weekends.
The location was good though a little too close for Mandy’s liking, only a few streets away.
But she realized it would be convenient for the kids.
She still hadn’t had the conversation with them yet.
She was dreading it but knew she had to do it soon.
They probably sensed that something was up.
She’d been quieter than usual, and Cory had been gone all week.
She’d simply told them that Daddy was busy with work, which they didn’t question. He was always busy with work.
Cory was all apologies when he’d called to tell her about the rental and again asked if she’d consider taking him back.
He seemed surprised that she kept saying no.
She knew him though, and even though she’d told him it wasn’t going to happen, Cory was probably going to keep asking, hoping that eventually she’d say yes.
That strategy usually worked for him. But she didn’t think it was going to work this time.
Mandy did briefly consider taking him back and seeing if they could move on and try to get past it.
But she quickly dismissed the idea, because she knew the trust was gone, and oddly enough, she no longer found him even remotely attractive.
The thought of being physical with him was repulsive.
So that made it a little easier to say no.
What she was still struggling with was why it had happened.
Cory had said it had nothing to do with her, but she couldn’t help think that it had to be partly her fault, that she hadn’t been enough or did something that pushed him away.
Maybe they’d just grown apart as Cory’s work consumed him more and more and they began to spend less time together.
It was Mandy and the kids all the time, and Cory off doing his own thing.
And it wasn’t like she hadn’t tried to get him to do more with them, with her especially.
But he rarely agreed. He was either too busy or too tired from work.
So she had to keep reminding herself of that when she worried that she was somehow at fault.
It was hard though.She’d never felt so alone before.
The sprawling house seemed empty without Cory in it.
His energy was big, and the house was quiet without him.
Her first instinct was to move, to get out, but she knew that was selfish.
This was the only home her kids had ever known, and she couldn’t take that away from them.
She knew that if they divorced, it was going to be stressful for the kids too.
Not to mention an unexpected change, and she would do whatever possible to ease that stress. So they weren’t going anywhere.
She decided to tell the kids after she picked them up from school.
They came bounding into the car, all excited to tell her about their day.
While she was waiting in the parking lot, she’d called in an order for takeout from Millie’s.
The kids loved tacos, and it would be a fun treat for them and she wouldn’t have to cook.
The food was ready when they reached the restaurant, and once they got home and were all sitting around the dining room table eating an early dinner, she told them what was going on.
“So I have some news that might seem a little strange. Your father and I have separated, and he’s going to be staying somewhere else. He got a place not far from here. On the water, so that should be fun for you guys.”
Brooke set her taco down and looked confused and angry.
“Why?”
Mandy sighed. “Sometimes people are happier apart than together. Your father and I got married young, and I think we’ve grown apart. We have different interests. Other than you kids, of course.”
“Is it us? Did we do something?” Blake asked. His lower lip trembled slightly, and Mandy immediately got up and gave him a hug.
“Of course not, honey. This has nothing to do with you kids. Your father loves you both very much. It’s between me and him.”
“He doesn’t love you anymore?” Brooke looked dubious.
Mandy hesitated. “We both love and respect each other, but we’ve decided that this is best for us right now.”
“I don’t understand this at all.” Brooke’s eyes watered, and Mandy gave her a hug too.
“I’m so sorry, honey. I don’t really understand it either, to be honest. But it’s what we need to do. You’ll see your father this weekend.”
“We have to go stay with him? And leave you? I don’t know if I want to do that.”
“It will just be for one night. He’ll come get you on Saturday and bring you home on Sunday. It will be fun to see his place.” Mandy tried to sound positive and didn’t want to say anything negative about Cory. The kids didn’t need to know he’d cheated.
“I don’t like this at all.” Brooke took a final bite of her taco and seemed to have lost interest in the other one on her plate.
“I don’t either,” Blake said. But his appetite didn’t seem to be affected.
“I’m sorry, kids. I know it’s going to be a change for all of us. But we’ll figure it out. Brooke, finish your taco.” Mandy understood though. She hadn’t felt like doing much of anything all week. “If you both finish your dinner, we’ll have some ice cream and maybe watch a movie. Sound good?”
“What kind of ice cream?” Brooke asked.
“Mint chocolate chip. I picked some up yesterday.”
That got a smile out of her. It was Brooke’s favorite flavor.
“Okay, but I get to pick the movie.”
Mandy smiled. “Deal.”
Later that evening, after they’d all snuggled together on the sofa watching a movie and the kids were sound asleep in bed, Mandy found herself wide awake.
She couldn’t find anything she wanted to watch on TV and looked around for a book to read before remembering that she still had Grams’s diary in her tote bag.
She fished it out, climbed into her pajamas, and curled up in bed to read for a bit.
She thought she’d probably just read for a few minutes until her eyes grew heavy, but the opposite happened, and she read for over an hour. And learned more about the mysterious Jay.
Dear Diary, Jay asked me to marry him! Of course I said yes.
It was the most romantic thing. He took me to our favorite restaurant in the North End, Cantina Italiana, and instead of our usual wine, he ordered a bottle of champagne, and I didn’t think anything of it.
I had no idea. I just thought he wanted something different.
But once it was poured and we put our orders in, Jay got down on his knee and held out the most beautiful ring I’ve ever seen.
It was his grandmother’s, and it’s so delicate and pretty. I can’t stop staring at it.
The rest of the night was magical. I barely remember eating my pasta, we were so busy making our plans for our life together. We decided that we’ll aim for a New Year’s Eve wedding, so that gives me six months to plan. I’m so excited that I don’t think I’ll sleep a wink tonight.
The next few entries were more about the wedding planning and her grandmother’s search for the perfect dress. The search was put on hold though when the United States entered the war and Jay promptly enlisted.
Dear Diary, We’re at war now. And Jay and his friends went down as soon as it was announced to sign up.
I understand why they did of course, and I support it, but I wish he wasn’t going.
I won’t be able to fully relax until it’s over and he’s home.
The wedding, of course, is on hold until he comes back.
It might be sooner or later, no one really knows. It’s a scary time for all of us.
Her grandmother’s worry was evident in the next few entries, which spanned several months.
Dear Diary, It looks like this blasted war is never going to end.
I write to Jay every week and hear back maybe once a month if I’m lucky, and it’s a relief every time.
He says he’s well, but I know he’s anxious to get home too.
I have these awful dreams sometimes, nightmares really where he never comes home.
It’s my biggest fear. But I try to stay focused on my job, and I pray for him every night and every Sunday in church.
There were a few more entries, and then nothing until nearly two years later.
Dear Diary, I know I have ignored you. I just haven’t felt like writing for the longest time.
My biggest fear has come true. A telegram arrived saying that Jay is missing in action and presumed dead.
His plane was shot down. I held out hope that maybe it was wrong information, but his parents are having a service this Sunday, which makes it real.
I feel like I’ve lost a piece of my soul.
I don’t think I will ever be able to love anyone the way that I loved Jay. I miss him so much.
Mandy closed the diary through blurry eyes. Now she knew who Jay was to her grandmother, and her heart hurt thinking of the pain she must have felt. She was only halfway through the diary, so she looked forward to reading more and learning about when her grandparents met and about Mimi’s Place.