20. Maeve #2
The words slip out before I can stop them, revealing more about my own struggles than I intended. I don’t think it’s fair to romanticize suffering as some kind of character-building exercise. Sometimes trauma just breaks you, and then you have to spend years trying to piece yourself back together.
Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “Oh?”
“It’s nothing,” I say quickly, regretting my outburst.
“Would this have to do with the debt you mentioned last night?”
“Maybe.” I stare down at my half-eaten omelet, suddenly finding it difficult to meet his eyes. “Sorry. It’s hard to talk about financial struggles with someone who’s so successful. I probably sound like I’m making excuses.”
“We all start somewhere,” Gabriel reminds me, his tone gentler than I expected. “Success doesn’t erase where you came from.”
I suppose he’s right about that. “It’s just—my debt isn’t really because of choices I made.
I mean, yes, I took out substantial student loans, but I had a plan for dealing with those after graduation.
I knew what I was getting into.” I take a shaky breath.
“But then I discovered that my mother had been taking out credit cards in my name for years. The amount of debt I found myself buried under was… I still sometimes feel sick thinking about those numbers.”
Gabriel’s expression softens with what looks like genuine concern. “Did Liam know about this situation?”
“God, no.” I shake my head emphatically.
“I could never have told him. I mean, I knew I should have, especially after we got engaged. You’re supposed to be honest with your partner about everything, right?
But I kept putting it off. I think deep down I knew he wasn’t the right person for me, so I kept that part of my life separate. ”
Gabriel nods thoughtfully, and maybe it’s the understanding look on his face that makes me keep talking, even though I normally would never confide in my boss like this.
“I think the worst part was my mother’s reaction when I confronted her,” I continue, the old anger and hurt bubbling up.
“She didn’t understand why I was upset. She acted like she’d done nothing wrong, like because I was her child, she had every right to use my name and credit however she wanted.
Like I owed her that somehow.” I shake my head, still amazed by the audacity.
“I finally gave up trying to make her understand and cut contact. I had to involve the police and a lawyer to make sure she couldn’t open anything else in my name, but there was nothing I could do about the debt she’d already accumulated.
So I’ve spent every day since graduation working as hard as I can to pay it off. ”
“Well, I can’t say I’m pleased to hear about your situation,” Gabriel says with a slight smile, “but I am relieved to know that we do pay you adequately and you’re not living in that shoebox apartment because of your salary.”
Of course Ford and Hayden told him about my living situation. These three share everything with each other, which should probably annoy me more than it does.
“But I do know something about toxic family dynamics,” Gabriel continues quietly.
“It took me years to break free from my own family’s expectations and manipulations.
What you did—cutting contact and facing your debt head-on instead of hiding from it—that takes real strength.
Many people would have simply ignored the problem and let it destroy them.
Your determination to handle it responsibly deserves recognition. ”
His words surprise me. Gabriel and I seem like such different people. He’s worldly, sophisticated, effortlessly charming, not to mention incredibly wealthy. But here we are, finding common ground in our shared experience of family members who tried to drag us down.
“Besides,” Gabriel adds with a mischievous twinkle in his dark eyes, “you’re still young. You have plenty of time to channel your childhood trauma into achieving your dreams.”
“You’re impossible,” I say, rolling my eyes but unable to hide my fondness. “I’ll be sure to thank my mother in my James Beard Award acceptance speech.”
Not that I’d ever presume to aim that high in my culinary career, but a girl can dream. And now, thanks to Ford’s generous payment for this fake engagement, the dream of being debt-free and opening my own restaurant isn’t as impossible as it once seemed.
Gabriel chuckles, and I feel a warm glow of satisfaction at making him laugh. I’m about to tell him exactly how I plan to achieve my culinary dreams, and that it’s all thanks to Ford’s incredible generosity, when Elaine sweeps into the dining room like a Christmas tornado.
“Darlings!” she exclaims, her eyes bright with the kind of manic energy that only comes from having a perfectly planned day ahead. “Thank goodness you’re both up! We need to get moving. I’ve already roused everyone else from their beds. Come along now—we have so much to accomplish today!”
Gabriel and I exchange amused looks as we stand, both of us clearly thinking the same thing. We’re about to be swept up in Hurricane Elaine’s Christmas extravaganza, and there’s no escaping it now.