Chapter Five
Casey
“P ay attention to me,” Clara says, snapping her fingers in front of my face. “What is going on with you?”
The truth is, I don’t know.
Last night, at dinner, I started to feel something strong for Brayden.
When he called me “babe,” it felt right.
I wasn’t lying when I told him he was intense.
But, while he was cleaning up the kitchen, his dad called.
As they discussed homework and graduation, I was immediately reminded why going after someone like him was a bad idea.
Too young.
The neighbor’s son.
And I’m too fresh out of a relationship to dive right back into one.
That’s the thing with Brayden. There’s no hesitation in his eyes. When he looks at me, it’s like I’m the surest thing he’s ever known.
“You said something about Smoke & Sugar,” I say lamely. “Sorry. Just have a lot on my mind.”
Clara stops on the walking path to stand in front of me. “I know. That’s why we’re doing the double date tonight. These two guys from my gym have invited us out to eat. I’ll take the cutest one, Wyatt. You can have the other one.”
My eyes widen. “Wait. A date? No. I can’t. I…” I like someone else.
“Why not?” Clara demands. “You can get out and have fun. I bet Derek is already on dating apps, getting laid as we speak.”
I know she’s trying to get me fired up to go on this date, but her words sting. I’m sure he’s popular on those apps, too. Derek was definitely a ten in the looks and physique department. He could have anyone he wanted.
At one time that was me.
My clothes suddenly feel too tight and small around my middle. Why can’t I lose the weight already? I’ve been walking a lot with Clara. Maybe I should say goodbye to carbs forever. She’ll convince me to go on this date and whoever “gets” me will be disappointed. Clara is also a ten.
I am not.
“Crap,” she grumbles. “Sorry. My mouth just says shit sometimes and it comes out mean. I don’t want to hurt your feelings. You’ve just seemed happier lately. I thought it was a good time for you to get your feet wet with dating again.”
I’m happier because Brayden chases away a darkness that’s settled over me.
“Just tell me you’ll go on the date,” Clara says. “Please. I’ll even do your eyeshadow. You know I’m basically a genius when it comes to eye makeup.”
I don’t disagree there.
“Oh, hey Brayden,” Clara calls out. “Tell Casey she’s beautiful and deserving.”
Without hesitation he says, “Casey, you’re beautiful and deserving.”
“See,” Clara crows. “Even the neighborhood kids think so.”
Brayden comes into view and gives me a curious look. Why does he have to always be so unintentionally cute? He doesn’t even have to try. A backwards ball cap on him paired with his crooked grin makes me weak.
“I’m trying to convince her to go out on a double date tonight,” Clara explains. “She needs to have a little fun. Someone will appreciate my bestie.”
I freeze, caught in Brayden’s confused stare. Then, his shoulders slightly hunch and his lips tug into a frown. It makes my chest physically ache.
Tell her no!
But my brain keeps chanting things like, “Date someone your own age,” or “Bradyen doesn’t need someone with your mental baggage,” or “You could make a bad situation worse by hooking up with the neighbor’s son.”
No is on the tip of my tongue, but I can’t push it out.
He finally lifts his chin and meets my gaze, hurt shining in his lovely green eyes. “If he doesn’t appreciate you, he’s a fucking fool.”
With those words, he storms off, taking my heart with him.
“See,” Clara says, oblivious. “A fool. Come on, let’s get ready.”
As much as I don’t want to be meeting these gym guys at the restaurant, I keep telling myself it’s the right thing to do.
I actually put in a lot of effort, too. My jeans are new, and I think they look sexy on my curves.
The black shirt I’m wearing is slightly cropped and shows my cleavage.
I’ve paired it with lots of fun jewelry and cute wedged shoes.
I can do this.
I look great and am ready to date.
When we enter Smoke & Sugar, I immediately recognize Savvy at the hostess stand. She’s young, like Brayden, and stunning. Her long brown hair has been swept up into a messy knot on top of her head. She wears a simple black uniform, but it just looks cute on her tiny frame.
I wonder if Brayden flirts with her on their way to school each day.
How could he not? I mean, look at her.
“Casey,” she greets, grinning. “So nice to see you.”
I’ve spoken to her a handful of times when getting the mail or while walking the trail. She’s a sweet girl, but there’s a fire in her eyes that can’t be ignored.
Clara stiffens. Oh, that’s right. Savvy “stole” Travis from her. I give Savvy a tight smile and then stand close to my friend to offer my support.
“We’re meeting a couple of guys,” Clara tells her coolly. “Are they here yet? Tall, muscular, handsome?”
She falters a bit, clearly shaken by Clara’s iciness. “Uh, yes. I’ll take you to them.”
Clara struts ahead of me in a figure-hugging dress that shows how great she looks from head to toe. I’d felt good when I left the house, but now, my familiar insecurities scratch to be let out.
A man with blond hair hugs her. She blushes at his attention. Must be the one she’s crushing on.
“I’m Wyatt,” the guy confirms, offering to shake my hand. “This is my buddy, Conrad.”
Conrad is hot. Exceptionally hot.
“Hi.” I shake Conrad’s hand. “Pleasure to meet you. I’m Casey.”
He gives me a quick once-over and then lets his eyes linger on Clara. A flash of embarrassment burns through me. I’m obviously the “not cute” one and he’s rethinking this date.
Awesome.
We sit down and I’m forced to look at Conrad. Clara chats animatedly, making everyone chuckle. Conrad skims his gaze over me again, and I see his lip pull up slightly.
Disgust.
He’s repulsed by me.
I can feel myself shrinking on the inside. If only I could make that work on the outside too. The menu has lots of delicious items, but I find myself searching for a salad or something healthy.
“So, you guys know Clara from the gym?” I ask, keeping my eyes on the menu.
Conrad chuckles. “It’s where we meet all the hot chicks. You should go.”
I jerk my head up, thinking I misheard him. “What?”
“The gym,” he says slowly, a taunting grin on his face.
Clara, clueless at his comment, jolts and grabs my arm. “Yes. You know I have been begging you to come with me sometime. Maybe we could all work out together.”
Conrad nods. “Absolutely. I do some personal training on the side. I’d love to give you some pointers.”
His words drip with condescension. I’m equally repulsed by this man.
Dinner continues on, the three of them carrying the conversation. I’ve mentally checked out. I’m not even hungry anymore. While they get sloshed on cocktails, I count down the seconds until we can leave.
I’m miserable.
Dinner last night was so much fun. Brayden made me feel desired—like I was actually something special and beautiful.
After we eat, Wyatt tries to get us to go to a bar. But Clara is already kind of drunk. She needs to go home. Maybe the two of them can go on a date without us.
“Sorry to be a buzzkill, but I need to get my girl home,” I say, forcing a smile. “Say bye, Clara.”
She pouts but then allows herself to get pulled into Wyatt’s embrace. They start kissing which his incredibly embarrassing to have to witness while standing next to a guy who doesn’t give two shits about you.
“I was serious,” Conrad says, giving my butt a playful smack. “Call me and set up a session. We’ll get this ass in shape. There’s probably a cutie hiding underneath all that.”
All that?
His breath stinks of liquor and garlic. Up close, I can see he’s not that cute. There’s a meanness in his eyes that makes him ugly. Unfortunately for him, he can work out until he’s nothing but muscle, but he can’t hide what lurks beneath.
“Fuck off,” I hiss. “You’re a piece of shit.”
He gapes at me, shocked at my words. I don’t let him say another word to me as I rush over to rescue my friend from the man sucking her face off. She complains all the way to the car, but I feel lighter with each step away from those douchebags.
Clara falls asleep on the way home which makes me even happier that I didn’t let them talk us into going to a bar. She’ll sleep it off and later I’ll tell her what an asshole Conrad was.
After I get her safely into her townhome, I finally make it to mine. I’ve barely gotten the door open when Mo rushes inside. He’s basically my cat now. I’m going to have to confess this to Maggie sooner or later.
I’m about to close the door when I hear someone clear their throat.
Brayden sits on his back porch, arms crossed over his chest. He’s watching me with an unreadable expression. I get the sense he’s pissed.
Because I went on a date?
“Hi, Brayden.” I walk over to the edge of my patio so I can see his face better. “You okay?”
He scrubs a palm over his face and shakes his head. “Nope. Feeling kind of shitty to be honest.”
Because of me.
I made him feel this way by leading him on and then dropping him at the first date that came along.
“Why?”
His stare bores into me. “You’re smart, babe. You can figure it out.”
I shiver at the word babe. “You’re unhappy I went on a date.”
“Unhappy,” he parrots, the word sounding strange as if it’s not the right one.
“Mad?”
He grunts as he rises to his feet. “I just want you to be happy. Are you? Did this guy do that for you? Did he make you smile?”
I tear my eyes from him, trying to ignore the heat the burns across my flesh as he strides across the yard to me. His footsteps thud on my deck until he’s standing too close for comfort.
“Casey,” he implores, voice husky. “Are you happy?”
I give him a small shake of my head.
He reaches up and cups my cheek. “Did he appreciate how sweet and beautiful you are?”
My eyes lift to meet his. They burn with such yearning that I want to get lost in them. I feel myself melting into him, drawing closer until my breasts brush against his chest.
“No,” I admit, shame flooding through me. “He did not. The date was awful, Brayden.”
He doesn’t relax at my words. His jaw muscle ticks as though he’s angry on my behalf.
“He doesn’t deserve you then,” he murmurs. His forehead rests on mine and his eyes squeeze shut. “Did I do something wrong last night?”
Pain lurches in my chest. “No, and that’s the problem.”
His thumb strokes my cheek, and his eyes bore into me again. “You are a fucking mystery to me, babe. How was that a problem?”
“You did everything perfectly right,” I whisper. “That terrifies me.”
He leans forward, lips ghosting over mine. “I’ll keep you safe. You don’t have to be afraid with me.”
After a beat, I let out a soft, “Okay.”
It’s a word that gives him more than permission to keep me safe.
It hands him a key…t o everything .
Will he want to open that door?