Chapter Eight #2
A few hours later, having ridden through the different stands of managed woodlands, Rafe had gained a much greater appreciation for the diversity of Thornthwaite’s land.
Since, as a boy, he’d preferred exploring the uncut forest and following his return, had focused on sheep and cattle, much of it he’d seldom or never seen.
After traversing some of the bracken-filled pastures that dotted the opening between woodlands, Juliana led him along a pathway that continued steadily uphill, until trees gave way to wiry grass pasture rising up towards the fells.
‘We’ll call on the sheep farmers now,’ he said.
‘Yes. The Russell farm is just ahead.’
A short time later, they spied Mr Russell kneeling in a meadow next to a young lamb. They admired the newcomer and its mother, and discussed the progress of the lambing season before bidding the farmer goodbye.
‘We’re so close here, may we continue up to the top of the fell?’ Juliana asked, pointing. ‘Resting there, one feels on top of the world.’
‘Lead on,’ Rafe said, curious to hear what comments being perched ‘on top of the world’ would inspire in her.
Leaving the horses grazing, they started up the hill towards the summit.
‘I know you plan to purchase more sheep, to help the estate rebuild its wool production more quickly,’ she said, as she picked her way around the rocks and stones.
‘Will there not be a problem integrating them with the rest of the flock? After all, Herdwick stock are all hefted, trained by their mothers to graze only in their home pastures.’
‘True, but if we obtain sheep from neighbouring flocks, they can continue to graze where they always have. We can paint them with the Thornthwaite smit mark, so it will be easy enough to separate them out when it is time for shearing.’
‘At least adding to the cattle herds won’t cause similar problems. As long are there are enough fields to graze them in.’
‘I’ve done an extensive review of the available land with Sterling. There should be sufficient meadows for grazing, along with areas of the bracken needed to produce fodder and bedding for the barns.’
‘You’ll need to allow some bracken to add to the thatch when the cottage roofs are redone. To keep away evil spirits, the Celts believed.’
‘We must definitely keep away the evil spirits,’ he agreed with a grin. ‘I need all the help I can get to make Thornthwaite a success.’
‘Do you know the old Gaelic song?’ When he shook his head, she continued, ‘It was about a fairy who, falling in love with a mortal girl, helped her gather bracken in the fields so he might be close to her. Until her brothers, discovering the trysts, hid her away from him. Bereft, he continued to gather bracken until he dropped with fatigue, hoping he might encounter her again. Tha mi sgith—“I am tired,” it’s called. ’
‘Sounds dreary.’
Batting his arm reprovingly, she said, ‘Sad, surely, but also beautiful. As is this!’ Reaching the crest of the hill, she led him to a huge boulder. While sheltering them from the increasingly fierce wind, it allowed an expansive view across the fells and down to the lake far below.
‘Remarkable, isn’t it?’ she breathed, a look of wonder lighting her face.
She was familiar with this place, he realized. ‘Is this where you came to sketch? Where you watched the peregrine falcons dive?’
‘Yes. Sometimes, remaining very still, I waited to watch the red deer approach. Despite my human scent, they seemed to accept me.’
‘Just another wild creature?’ he teased.
‘Am I not?’
Thinking of her exuberant, untutored and unselfconscious lovemaking, he said, ‘I love wild creatures.’
A shadow crossed her face. ‘Do you love them?’ she said, an odd note in her voice.
Then, her expression clearing, she said, ‘I came here not just for the creatures I might encounter. Do you not feel it, sitting here, that sense of freedom? Sweeping views from the fells to the lake to the fields of bracken and the woods beyond! As if one could wave a magic wand and be master of the world!’
If that was how this view made her feel, no wonder, with her family struggles, that she slipped away here as often as she could.
‘Except that you truly are,’ she said, turning to him before he could reply. ‘Earl of Thornthwaite, master of most of what can be seen from here.’
‘Which inspires not the lightness of freedom, but the burden of responsibility,’ he replied wryly.
‘Oh, but you mustn’t see it like that. Think rather of the opportunities!
To help tenants, improve the land and protect all who live upon it.
Ian would have been an indifferent steward.
But you, with what you’ve seen of the world, what your life as a soldier has taught you, will be capable of so much more.
Sterling sees this, the tenants do, and I certainly believe it. ’
He looked at her ardent face. Knowing she gave her honest opinion, with no thought of flattery or attempt to manipulate with praise, humbled him. ‘I only hope I prove worthy of your confidence.’
‘Oh, there will be mistakes and setbacks along the way, I’m sure. Nothing in life is perfect. But you have the vision, the strength and the desire to protect this. And you will.’
Despite their stone shelter, just then a particularly robust gust of wind buffeted them, making her stumble against him. He reached out to steady her…then drew her close, cradling her against his chest. ‘You are so good for me,’ he whispered into her hair.
Lacing her arms around his neck, she leaned up and kissed him, long and slow and deep.
His body responding instantly, he hugged her closer, his tongue teasing hers, letting her explore his mouth, nipping at her lips while he moved his hands down to cup her bottom and pull her against his burgeoning hardness.
Her wildness firing his in this wild and stormy place, he wasn’t sure how far he would have gone had not a piercing whistle penetrated the fog of desire. Breaking the kiss, he heard a loud ‘halloo’ before, a moment later, Sterling strode into view.
Half relieved, mostly frustrated, he gently distanced himself from Juliana and turned to greet the estate manager.
‘So sorry to interrupt, my lord. Farmer Russell told me you’d climbed up here. Magnificent view, isn’t it? A problem has developed on one of the farms. I’d appreciate it if you’d ride with me there, so we may settle the matter.’
‘You go on,’ Juliana said. ‘I should get back, see to dinner and other pressing household matters.’
‘I don’t want you riding back alone,’ he objected.
‘I’ll be fine. I grew up roaming these woods and fells, remember. Starlight is both sure-footed and docile; she’ll not run away with me or toss me into a hedgerow. Go on now, or you’ll not be back to Thorne Hall in time to dine.’
‘Even Starlight might cast a shoe or stumble over rocks,’ Rafe objected.
‘Jemmy, Russell’s lad, could take a pony and ride back with her,’ Sterling said.
‘I’m sure Jemmy has chores to do,’ Juliana objected. ‘He doesn’t need to waste his time riding all the way to Thorne Hall.’
‘Perhaps just to the bracken meadows, then,’ Sterling suggested. ‘Once off the fells, the ground isn’t as rocky and treacherous.’
‘Starlight and I can find our way home from there with little chance of mishap. So—to the bracken, if you insist, though it’s really not necessary.’
‘Very well, only to the meadows. But be careful the rest of the way! I don’t want to have to go out in the dark looking for a missing wife.’
Juliana rolled her eyes at him. ‘When I think of all the times I explored this land alone…’
‘Only because you succeeded in sneaking out and I covered for you,’ Rafe retorted.
Juliana chuckled. ‘Pax! Very well, an escort to the bracken fields…my lord and master,’ she added in a mock-obsequious tone, giving him an elaborate curtsey.
Rafe stifled a smile. ‘Careful, or I might have to dig out your old governess’s switch and apply punishment later.’
‘Ooh, that sounds promising,’ she murmured for his ears alone as she started back down the hill beside him.
The image her remark conjured—having her bent bare-bottomed over his knees—dried his mouth and set his body aflame, robbing him of any retort. Though he would rather kiss those soft mounds than paddle them… Might that be what she’d beguile him with tonight?
He’d dispose of whatever problem awaited him at the farm and return as quickly as possible to make sure there was no delay in serving dinner.
And then lead her to their bedchamber for another night of sensual discovery.
Half an hour later, Juliana bid goodbye, with apologies, to young Jemmy as he left her at the closest meadow and trotted off.
Though he waved off her regrets and replied with a grin that he’d rather thank her, as he didn’t mind a bit exchanging his chores for a task that required no more effort than sitting a sure-footed fell pony.
She watched the little mare trot away, smiling, until a cow lowing in the pasture captured her attention.
Her smile faded as her gaze swept the field to the trees bordering its far end where, on the far side of a stone wall flourished a thick undergrowth of bracken, the new green of emerging fronds luminous against the brown of the winter-killed plants.
Cutting the bracken… She heard again in her ear the sad, lilting Gaelic tune she’d learned from one of the nursemaids as a child. Small wonder returning to her rock retreat on the heights had recalled it.
She had fled there and sung it to herself often enough in the grim, heartbroken days after learning Rafe had fallen in love with Thalia Heathcote.
Her last hope, that the news might be just an exaggerated bit of her mother’s London gossip, being snuffed out when he returned home, his face alight with passion and talking of nothing but his incomparable Thalia.
That confirmation of his feelings put an end once and for all to daydreams about a future with him she only then acknowledged she’d wanted more than anything. Making her realize with soul-deep despair that, as he saw Thalia as his one true love, he was hers.
She would never claim the love of the childhood friend who’d roamed the fields with her.
The young man who’d indulged her and helped her hide away a red squirrel named Bixby.
Who’d always made time for her, who didn’t seem to find her odd or embarrassing, who never tried to coax her into behaving like a typical young lady.
That discovery left her alone, bereft, abandoned and wandering the woodlands and meadows they’d explored together like the fairy of the song, ‘Tired and alone/cutting the bracken, cutting the bracken/forever cutting the bracken.’
As the deep sadness of those long-ago days welled up, she struggled to banish the emotion, force it back into the hurting place deep within into which she’d imprisoned it years ago.
Her story had ended much better than that of the lovesick fairy, she reminded herself.
Her lover had not been forever parted from her, but was here now, at her side.
She might not have his love, but she had his company, his kindness and his promise of fidelity. She’d discovered with him a depth of passion she’d never dreamed existed when she was indulging her girlhood dreams.
A passion in which Rafe obviously delighted as much as she did.
Forcing back the memory of love unrequited, she turned her thoughts to their interlude on the fell.
Had they not been interrupted, would Rafe have made love to her, there under the wind-driven clouds, in the shadow of her rock fortress?
Her body shivered in response at the thought.
She’d seen the passion darkening his eyes and quickening his breath. He’d desired her, she knew without doubt.
He loved ‘wild creatures’ he’d said, inferring that he viewed her as one.
Better to lock away the hopeless dreams of youth and concentrate on tempting him with the ‘wildness’ he found appealing.
Forget about a love he could never offer her and bind him closer instead with the passion they both shared.