Chapter 2 #2
I forced my eyes away and continued to serve the parties in my section, doing my best to pretend they didn’t exist. It would have been easier had Sybil not caught sight of me.
Every time I happened to look up, I’d catch one of her nasty looks meant only for me.
It was a bit unnerving to feel her eyes on my back as I worked, like nails digging into my flesh. It made me sick.
“Just shake it off,” I muttered to myself.
After a while, as I was walking to deliver a tray of drinks to one of my tables, Sybil nearly ran into me on her way out toward the exit with the rest of the group. I caught the tray of drinks before they fell, steading myself. “Watch it—”
Sybil walked behind me, circling me like a shark while she mumbled under her breath.
“Jeez Crissa, watch where you’re going. Can’t you see we’re walking here?
” She tossed her long, red hair over her shoulder, exposing her black widow tattoo along the side of her neck.
The image of it burned into my mind as I bit my tongue.
“Eww.” Sybil sniffed the air around me. “Smells like someone’s been chugging cough syrup while on the clock.
No wonder she seems so unstable. I bet that’s why her dad kicked her to the curb.
” The group tried to hide their laughter while she grinned with pride.
My tongue clicked and I glared at her. “Oh, ‘cause stalking me at my fucking job is such stable behavior, isn’t it? Why can’t you go somewhere else?
Anywhere else! There’s an entire fucking mall right here, filled with places for you to sulk about in.
But no, you have to be here all the fucking time, harassing me like it’s some sick turn on. It’s like you're obsessed with me!”
Sybil scoffed and crossed her arms. “What did you say?” I didn’t answer, regretting my words. She stepped real close, stopping only an inch or so away before speaking into my ear. “The only obsession I have with you, freak, is the one where I get to watch you suffer.”
“Why?” My spine straightened and my breath hitched at her words. I was nearly shaking from how close she was.
She pulled back and smiled down at me. “Because I can.” Before I could even blink, a large party interrupted us and walked past. I reached out to steady the drink tray right as someone bumped me, knocking the tray over and spilling all the drinks onto Sybil and myself.
“Oh my god, Crissa!” she screamed as the whole pizzeria stopped and eyed us. “Ahh! You fucking freak!”
My heart raced and my cheeks burned as I tried to reach out and help her. “No! I swear I–I didn’t mean to!”
Montey stepped between us, blocking me from Sybil as if I was a threat. The look he flashed me nearly shattered my heart. “What the hell is wrong with you?” He removed his jacket and placed it around Sybil’s drenched shoulders.
“I–I…it was an accident I swear!” His dark eyes only glared at me.
“Montey…you know me.” I reached out to him, but he only pulled away from my touch.
I looked past him at Lavender and the twins, but their faces were smothered in looks of embarrassment.
“Really? Years of friendship and knowing everything about each other and you think I would actually do something like this on purpose?” Lavender looked away bashfully as the twins exchanged a look. “Wow. Screw you guys.”
“Crissa.” I spun around to see Tawny standing with her hands atop her hips. “That’s enough, kid.”
My jaw tensed. “Yeah, it is.” I shoved past my boss. “I’m going back on break.”
Fucking Sybil. What the fuck does she even know? No one knows why I had to move out because they all ditched me!
I stopped just outside the kitchen doors and looked back across the pizzeria, noticing Sybil being comforted by Montey.
She was still wearing his jacket and had her arm looped around his while she stared up at him like a lost puppy.
He gently brushed away strands of her soda-soaked hair and cupped her face in his hands.
I felt a pang of jealousy shoot through my chest at the sight of them.
Despite hooking up all last summer, he never once looked at me that way…especially not in public.
“Fuck this.” I wasted no time rushing through the kitchen to the back alley door.
I ripped the neck ruff from my costume off and tossed it down with my clown hat before plopping down on the curb.
My green hair was all messed up and wet, smelling of soda.
A loud groan fell from my lips and my head sank.
I felt embarrassed, ashamed, and rejected.
All my old friends just stood there, thinking I was some kind of monster. A freak.
That look Montey gave me…I’ll never forget it.
I raised my knees and clutched them close to my chest. Tears burned my eyes and streaked the clown makeup that covered my face.
“Crissa?” Her voice startled me. “Are you okay?”
I sat up and lightly brushed the tears away, hoping she didn’t hear me crying and hoping my makeup wasn’t totally obliterated. “The fuck you want?” I snapped.
Lavender sat down on the curb next to me. “I’m sorry about Sybil. She really shouldn’t have said that about you.”
“And yet you let her.” My body shrunk into itself. “You all just let her do and say whatever she wants. Why?” My eyes met hers. “Why, Lavender? I was your childhood friend. Not her!”
Her blue eyes fell and the dark curls around her freckled face bounced as she spoke. “That’s not fair.” She picked at her fingers.
“Not fair?” I scoffed. “What’s not fair is how you guys dumped me for her—”
“Can you just let it go, Crissa? Fuck.” Lavender sighed and stood.
“Look, I came here to apologize for what she said and let you know that Sybil feels bad. Montey insisted on taking her home, but she wanted me to let you know she didn’t mean it.
” I rolled my eyes at the bullshit answer.
“She didn’t, Crissa. And as a peace offering, she wanted me to invite you to our party tonight. ”
I looked up at her both shocked and confused. “I’m not sure which is more ridiculous…Sybil inviting me to a party or Sybil apologizing.”
Lavender huffed and crossed her arms. “She is sorry.”
Considering how she just threatened to ruin my life, I highly doubt it.
I stumbled to my feet and grabbed the pieces of my uniform. “Thanks for the offer, but pass.”
Lavender stopped me from opening the back door. “Crissa, please. Just come to the party. It’ll be like old times.”
I stepped closer and looked straight into her eyes. “No, it won’t. You know why?” I leaned in and grabbed the handle of the door. “Because we’re not friends.”
Lavender eyed me as I yanked the door open and forced her aside. “Tawny!” I walked past my ex-friend and stepped into the pizzeria. “I’m going home.”
Light rain tapped against the window of my bedroom as I plopped down on my bed and fell onto my back.
My wet, green hair sprawled all around me, no longer smelling of soda, but of my shampoo and conditioner.
It felt great to take a nice, long shower and just take a moment to breathe and exist, giving me time to really think about Lavender’s words.
“Sybil apologizes…Sybil is so sorry,” I mocked.
“And she actually thinks I’d ever believe she wanted to invite me to a party?
Ha! What a joke.” I rolled over and snatched the old book from my nightstand, flipping it open to my last journal entry.
My fingertips glided across the old page, feeling it within my grasp while inhaling the old dusty pages.
It had all become part of my daily ritual, and every time I partook, it sent a comforting wave down my spine.
It’s odd…this book gives me the same feelings I get when I talk to the little rats at work. I guess you could call it my friend too.
I flipped to a new page, picked up a pen, and began to write about my day. “Today was…well, another shitty day.” With a heavy sigh, I looked down at my sentence and blinked. Only when I looked again, my words had morphed. It wasn’t what I had written, but something different.
I read the new sentence aloud. “Sybil got what she deserved.” I stopped and stared at the single sentence, confused as to how and why it was different. It was my handwriting, but the words…they weren’t mine.
“That’s fucking weird,” I whispered, scratching the sentence out with the ink.
I tried to rewrite my previous sentence, but when I lifted the pen, I looked at my words to see the same exact sentence written once again.
“What the hell?” I angrily scratched it out and tried to write for a third time.
“Today…was…a—” I blinked and the words changed.
“What the fuck?!” The tip of my pen scratched through the words, spilling ink along the page…
only the ink kept moving, like a liquid snake.
What the hell is happening?
The ink bled into the porous surface, forming odd shapes that began to fill the page…then the next…one after another as I stared in absolute horror at what I saw.
Written on both pages was the same sentence repeated…over…and over…and over again…and again…and again.