Chapter 28
Audrey
Audrey rested her forehead against the cool, solid oak of the front door.
The adrenaline that had kept her spine rigidly straight on the damp asphalt suddenly evaporated, leaving her trembling so violently her knees threatened to buckle.
She slid slowly down the wood until she was sitting on the entryway floor, her trench coat pooling around her.
Her hands shook as she dug into her purse and pulled out her phone. She didn't hesitate. She pressed Nathaniel’s name.
He answered on the first ring.
"Audrey," Nate breathed, his voice rough and laced with a tight, simmering anxiety. "Did he hurt you? Are you safe?"
"I'm safe. He's gone," Audrey whispered, squeezing her eyes shut as a single, exhausted tear slipped down her cheek. "Are you okay? Your jaw..."
"I'll live. It's just a bruise," Nate dismissed instantly, though the slight wince in his voice betrayed the pain of the punch. "Audie, I am so sorry. I never intended to turn your driveway into a war zone. If I had known he was following you—"
"You didn't do anything wrong, Nate," Audrey interrupted gently, her mind finally clearing enough to see the absolute wreckage of the evening. "But it proved exactly why we can't keep doing this."
A heavy, static-filled silence stretched over the cellular line. Nate didn't speak. He was perceptive enough to see the exact trajectory of her thoughts before she even voiced them.
"We can't do this," Audrey choked out, the words burning her throat. "Not right now. Not while we are both bleeding."
Nate let out a slow, ragged exhale. "Audrey..."
"It isn't fair, Nate," Audrey explained, her voice gaining a desperate, unyielding clarity.
"It isn't fair for me to use you as a painkiller while I face the end of my marriage.
And it isn't fair to you, either. You are fighting a brutal war with your own divorce.
We are both carrying too much wreckage right now to build anything real.
We're just finding desperate relief in each other. "
"I don't care about the wreckage," Nate fired back, a fiercely protective edge bleeding into his tone. "I care that you are going to be sitting in a room with him, bleeding out, and I won't be able to reach you."
"If what we have is real," Audrey pleaded, pressing the heel of her hand against her aching chest, "if we are actually meant to find our way back to each other, it can't be like this.
It can't be a secret escape in the back of a car.
We need a clean slate. I have to face this on my own, and you need to finalize your divorce.
If it's right, we will find our way back when the timing is right. But we can't force it in the dark."
The silence returned, but this time it wasn't tense; it was heavy with a profound, agonizing mutual understanding. He couldn't argue with her logic, because he knew she was absolutely right.
"Eighty-nine days of absolute silence," Nate finally said, his voice dropping to a low, devastatingly tender register. "No calls. No showing up at your office."
"Nothing," Audrey confirmed, her heart physically aching at the loss of her sanctuary. "I need you to let me do this the right way, Nate."
"Okay," he whispered. The sheer magnitude of his grace, his willingness to step entirely out of the picture just to give her the clarity she needed, was staggering. "I will give you the silence, Audie. But the second you are free, I'm coming to find you."
"Goodbye, Nate."
"Goodbye, Audrey."
She ended the call, dropping the phone onto the floor. Sitting entirely alone in the dark hallway of her pristine, silent house, Audrey finally allowed herself to shatter.
Thursday, 4:00 PM
Dr. Elias Thorne’s office was quiet, the white noise machine humming its steady, rhythmic pulse in the corner.
Audrey sat in the winged armchair, her posture impeccably straight, her hands folded neatly in her lap. She wore a tailored charcoal blazer and trousers, her professional armor firmly locked into place.
Directly across from her, the deep velvet sofa was entirely empty.
It was ten minutes past the hour. Dr. Thorne sat in his low leather chair, a pen resting loosely in his hand. He glanced at the muted clock on his desk, then looked calmly at Audrey.
"I received a brief email from Simon's attorney an hour ago," Dr. Thorne stated, his voice completely neutral. "Simon will not be attending our session today. He cited a personal emergency."
Audrey didn't flinch. She stared at the empty velvet cushions. A strange, physical sensation washed over her—a sudden loosening of the iron band that had been constricting her chest since she woke up that morning.
"I see," Audrey replied smoothly.
"His absence speaks volumes, Audrey," Dr. Thorne noted, leaning forward slightly, his perceptive eyes locking onto hers. "What are you feeling right now, looking at that empty sofa?"
Audrey took a slow, deep breath, checking in with her own heart. "I feel... I can breathe again. I feel relieved."
"Let's explore that relief," Dr. Thorne invited gently. "We have fifty minutes. The clock on your stipulation is ticking regardless of his attendance. This is your time. Why are you relieved that your husband didn't show up today?"
Audrey looked down at her hands, the polished facade cracking just a fraction to reveal the raw, bruised woman underneath.
"Because Tuesday night, after we left this office, he showed up at my house unannounced," Audrey confessed.
Dr. Thorne didn't react with shock, but his pen stilled. "Go on."
For the next twenty minutes, Audrey methodically laid out the events of the driveway. She spoke about Nate's presence, the violent brawl on the asphalt, the garden hose, and the devastating, venomous exchange that followed. She didn't spare herself, and she didn't soften Simon's devastation.
"He looked at me," Audrey said, her voice dropping into a hollow, haunting register, "and he was completely destroyed.
I could see his heart breaking right there on the pavement.
He yelled that he was dismantling his life to prove he was sorry, but watching him shatter like that. .. it made me feel guilty."
"Let's stay with that," Dr. Thorne said softly. "Why do you think his pain made you feel guilty?"
"Because I hate feeling guilty over something I did for myself!
" Audrey burst out, her voice thick with frustration and unshed tears.
"I needed to feel alive. I needed comfort, and I enjoyed it.
And it wasn't just with some random coworker in a cheap hotel room.
It was with a man I actually like, someone who meant something to me, someone who treated me with care when I was drowning.
But standing there, seeing the pure devastation in Simon's eyes.
.. I felt awful for hurting him. And I am so furious at myself for still caring about his pain after what he did to me. "
"Audrey, that guilt is just proof of your empathy," Dr. Thorne said gently, validating the heavy truth she had just uncovered.
"You are not a cold person. You spent ten years loving that man.
You can't just flip a switch and become indifferent to his suffering, even when he is the one who caused the wreckage.
But feeling empathy for his pain does not mean you are wrong for seeking your own comfort. "
Audrey closed her eyes, a fresh, sharp ache blooming behind her ribs.
"It just makes me question everything. I am a smart woman, Dr. Thorne.
I pay attention to the details of my life.
I notice things. But I didn't see him pulling away.
I didn't see the late nights for what they were.
I didn't see Emily. How could I have been so blind to the collapse of my own home? "
Dr. Thorne set his legal pad on the small table beside him, giving her his complete, undivided attention.
"You didn't look for the cracks, Audrey, because your marriage was your sanctuary," Dr. Thorne said, his voice a deep, grounding anchor in the room.
"You don't build a fortress with someone, hand them the keys, and then sleep with one eye open expecting the walls to attack you.
Your failure to see the betrayal is not a failure of your intelligence.
It is proof of your absolute, uncorrupted trust. You trusted your husband.
That is a beautiful, healthy thing. He broke it, not you. "
A sudden, violent sob tore from Audrey’s throat, completely bypassing her rigid control. She pressed her hands over her mouth, but the tears finally spilled over, hot and fast, ruining her careful makeup.
"I miss him," Audrey wept, the most vulnerable truth finally dragged out into the light.
"I hate him for what he did, and I am so deeply disgusted by him, but God, I miss the man I thought he was.
I miss my life. I miss sitting on the couch on a Tuesday night and just feeling safe.
And I am so angry that I have to be the one to clean up the ruins. "
Dr. Thorne handed her a box of tissues, allowing the heavy, necessary grief to completely fill the room. He didn't rush her. He let her cry for the death of her reality.
"You are mourning a ghost," Dr. Thorne said gently when her breathing finally began to slow.
"The Simon you miss does not exist anymore.
He may never have existed in the exact way you believed.
But the woman sitting in this chair? The woman who demanded the truth instead of accepting a cheap apology?
She is very real. And she is incredibly strong. "
Audrey wiped her eyes, taking a deep, shuddering breath. The anger and the profound sadness were still there, but the suffocating confusion had begun to dissipate.
"Eighty-six days left," Audrey whispered, looking at the empty velvet sofa, grounding herself in her new reality. "And if he doesn't show up, I will sit here and heal myself."
"Exactly," Dr. Thorne smiled softly. "Our time is up for today. I will see you next week."