23. Megan
Chapter 23
Megan
By late February, Ollie and I have a good thing going on. We operate around each other, he cleans up after himself, and if he’s still working on the van when I go to bed, I leave the hallway lamp on for him.
Beyond my accidentally walking in on him post-shower one time, then accidentally stripping off in front of him, I’m pleased to say there’s been no more drama.
He’s actually quite sweet for such a young guy. When he caught me crying about being single on Valentine’s Day, he bought flowers after work, and they looked lovely next to the bouquet of roses Dad always sends and pretends to know nothing about.
It also turns out living with a builder is quite handy. Wonky cupboards and loose floorboards seem to repair themselves overnight. I never see him fixing things, but I'm extremely grateful he’s sorting jobs I’ve been putting off for ages.
In the evenings, he spends a lot of time working on his van, and weekends are much the same. It gives me the space I need to get marking and school work done, and this morning I even managed to squeeze in a yoga video before lunch.
Having most of my time alone is a godsend, but it does sometimes feel like we are ships passing in the night. I should probably suggest another dinner together soon. I could cook for him this time, since he made such an effort for me before.
I’m finishing a plate of scrambled eggs with avocado and sourdough when Kara phones.
“Hi lovely, how are you?”
“Oh thank God, you’re there.” I sit up straight, hearing the panic in her voice. “Something happened and I'm calling because I feel awful about it.”
“Are you OK? Where are you?”
“We're at Granny Annie's,” she rushes out.
Luke grew up with his Grandma, and they have an incredible bond. I’ve met her a few times, and she’s wonderful. Kind, but quick-witted, and never afraid to tell you how she really feels. “Is she OK?”
“She’s fine. That's not why I’m calling. Shit, I’m so sorry, Megs.”
“You’re really worrying me. What is it?”
She hasn’t sounded like this since the days after her ex-boyfriend walked out on her, days where Hattie and I wouldn’t let her out of our sight because she was so heartbroken.
She blows out a quick breath. “Granny Annie invited the boys over for lunch and so they've brought their other halves and my stupid baby brain didn't connect that nobody would have told you. So now we’re all hanging out, but you're not here. I'm such an airhead, I'm so sorry.”
“Oh.” I look around my quiet, empty living room and try not to feel lonelier than ever.
These should be the best years of my life, and instead I’m spending almost every weekend alone. There's still no boyfriend, and I’m an afterthought to my friends.
“Wait. Did you say baby brain? Kara! Are you pregnant?”
“Yes! That's why I'm calling you,” she whispers. “I’m hiding in the bathroom. We are planning on telling everyone today and you're not here and I feel just awful. I’m so, so sorry. I couldn't tell everyone without you, so I'm calling you first.”
“Oh my gosh,” I manage, my sadness mixing with joy. “That’s amazing. Congratulations.”
“It's not too late to join us. Can you come over? We’ll wait for you.”
“I've had a drink,” I quickly lie.
“Really? It's lunchtime.”
“It’s 5 o’clock somewhere.” I force a laugh in an attempt to cover up what is veering dangerously close to an ugly cry.
“Are you on your own?”
“No, Ollie’s here,” I fib again. The last thing I need is her thinking I’m drinking on my own in the middle of the day and that I need an intervention.
“Ooh. Well, I can’t wait to hear about that development. Don’t let me keep you. Will you have one for me?”
I knew there was something off about that Dry January thing. If Hattie tells me she’s pregnant too, I don’t know how I’ll cope. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for us three. Husbands, houses, and babies to raise together. I never imagined I’d be the last one.
“I can’t believe you’re pregnant. How far along are you?”
“Only ten weeks, but we had an early scan and everything looks good.”
“I didn’t even know you were trying.”
“I know. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you. We didn’t think it would happen so fast. Are you coming to book club on Wednesday? I'll tell you all about it.”
“Sure. I'll be there.”
“OK. I can’t wait to see you. I’m sorry again, and I promise I will make this up to you.”
“I’m so happy for you,” I force myself to say. “Tell Luke I said congratulations.”
“I will. We love you so much, Megs. You’re gonna be the best auntie ever.”
“I love you too. Go have fun.”
And then she’s gone, leaving me to stare at my phone.
What a slap in the face. I'm devastated they forgot about me, but I'm thrilled for my friends who will make the most beautiful babies. And even more sad because my friend is having a baby and I'm doing nothing with my life.
Auntie Megs.
She's right, I will be the best auntie ever, but I want more. A family of my own. I’m not getting any younger, and enough is enough. Ollie laughed at me, literally laughed, when I told him I was waiting to meet the love of my life.
Well, he’s right. I’m not going to find him in my living room on a Saturday afternoon. It’s about time I took control of my destiny and go after my dreams instead of waiting for them to happen to me.