Chapter 16
It’s strangely quiet here. Rowan’s apartment isn’t far from a busy road, and it’s barely off the highway. But it’s a business district, and it’s night. We’re basically off the grid here.
Our night has been a blissful oscillation from sleep to sex. My body aches from his rough touch, yet I want more. Every single touch from him carries so much energy. It’s sensual, and I feel like anything I ask for he’ll deliver without expecting anything in return.
I’ve been lying naked on his bed for the last thirty minutes, my cheek resting on my folded arms as I stare at his face.
His fingertips paint long strokes up and down my back, tracing my spine and shoulder blades, then following the curve of my ass.
He wants me that way, and I want him to take me there, but he told me it’s not something to rush.
I trust him, and I don’t even find that scary.
“What are you thinking about?” His gaze has shifted up to mine.
I suck in my lips.
“You. How happy I am here. How free I feel.”
His mouth curls up on one side, and his eyes blink slowly.
“Good. I want you to like it here, with me.” His eyes linger on mine for a beat, and his teeth grab the tip of his tongue, almost as if they’re stopping him from saying too much.
I don’t care that Rowan has been with other women.
It would be foolish to think he hasn’t lived, hasn’t loved or lusted.
I have, and I’m six years behind him. But what I thought was intimacy with Caleb was fake, and I see that now.
I don’t think his brother ever looked at me after getting what he needed from my body. At least not like this.
“You know, I saw you have sex once. When I was sixteen,” I confess. I bite my knuckle as my face warms.
Rowan arches a brow.
“You watched me?” His palm flattens along my back, but he continues to massage my skin.
“Mmm hmmm,” I say, nodding while still resting my cheek on my arms. “It was at your dad’s house, in that garden just off the library, the one in the—”
“The atrium,” Rowan finishes with a soft laugh. His gaze drifts above me for a moment as he seems to be picturing the memory. “Everly Segal. She’s one of my father’s clients’ daughters. She hated her dad, and well . . . you know how I feel about mine. We were . . . bonding.”
His eyes drop back to mine.
“Mmm, yeah. You really bonded,” I tease. I’m not jealous. If anything, I’m curious. That was the first time I really saw anything like that, and it woke something up inside of me.
“She seemed so strong,” I say, trying to find words to articulate exactly what it was that held me captive for so long.
“She was. She is,” he corrects. “She took over her dad’s company after that. It was an ugly family break-up. Hostile takeover and all that.”
“Does she still work with your dad?” I ask, maybe a tinge of jealousy twisting my insides.
Rowan shakes his head.
“Her first executive decision was to start fresh and break ties with anyone her father worked with. I think she saw my dad for what he is.” His mouth falls into a flat line, and the longer I stare at his suddenly guarded expression, the more I think there are things about his father that he’s not fully telling me. I’m sure for good reason, too.
“What else did you like about it? Watching me?” His subtle shift back to the sexual part of the subject isn’t so subtle, and I shift my face into my arms to hide my blush as I giggle.
“I mean, it was hot,” I admit.
“Oh yeah?” His hand traces the curve of my back and rolls over my ass, his fingers sliding between my legs to feel how wet I am. It doesn’t take much with him. A thought. One visual.
A wish.
“Yeah,” I hum, turning my head just enough to look at him with one eye. My legs part slightly, giving him more access, which he takes, coating his hand with my arousal, then slipping a finger in my ass.
“You like it, don’t you?”
I nod. I know he said I need to go slow, but he also promised he’d take me there tonight. It’s close to sunrise, and I want him to have me everywhere before I leave this room today.
He dips another finger inside, sliding both in and out slowly, stretching me.
I arch my back to lift my ass higher, eventually crawling up to my knees while my forehead rests on the mattress.
Rowan shifts in the bed, getting on his knees and moving to the space behind me and guiding my hips back until I feel his hard cock press against my ass.
He pushes his fingers in again, deeper this time, and I begin to crave feeling him in my pussy too.
“You sure you want this?” he asks, working me with his hand, coating his fingers with my wetness and priming me for more.
I nod my head against the bed and moan out, “Yes.”
“I’ll be slow, easy,” he says, drawing his fingers out of me then replacing the fullness with the tip of his cock. The pressure is soft but wider . . . different, and I gasp in anticipation.
“Tell me if I need to stop,” he says, pushing into me slowly.
“Oh fuck,” I moan, my mouth wide open against the bed, my breath gone. At first the feel of him hurts, the stretch more than I expected. But he rocks in and out slowly, entering me only a few inches at a time as he gets my body used to his width.
“Is this good?” His caution and care are sweet, but I’m craving the other side of him, and I want to rush to the place where he’s no longer being so careful with me. I back into him to force him in deeper, and it hurts, but only for a moment.
“Oh, you want this,” he says, his voice lower and gruff. The sound boils inside of me and makes my belly tighten with anticipation.
“Uh huh,” I cry, my teeth biting the sheet as I rock back into him again, taking all of him.
Rowan’s hands fly to my hips, and he holds me in place, forcing me to take the stretch before he begins to move again.
“Breathe through it, Baby. Be patient,” he says, flattening one hand on the small of my back as he leans into me and reaches his other hand around to my front.
He glides his fingers between my legs, teasing my pussy while filling me from behind.
“You are so wet, Saylor,” he hums behind me. I feel his cool lips press against my back as he coats his fingers with me, then sinks two of them inside.
“Gah!” I groan into the bed, the fullness so satisfying.
He doesn’t thrust behind me for several seconds, instead fucking me with his hand and bringing me near orgasm.
Eventually, he pulls out of me slowly, and my ass aches from the stretch and loss of him inside of me.
I hear the slickness of his hand wrapped around himself as he coats himself with my arousal and his saliva, then he glides his cock back inside, this time rocking in and out at a slow pace that doesn’t hurt but rather teases.
His hands grip my hips again, and he begins to pull me back into him as his thrusts grow harder.
“Touch yourself,” he commands.
I do, my body flat on the bed except for my ass that is arched up into him, his cock pounding into it while my fingers run up and down the swollen folds between my legs.
I begin to circle my pussy and moan as I chase the sensation building in my core.
The scream that leaves my mouth surprises me, it’s animalistic, nothing reserved about it.
It’s proud, like an announcement that I am a sexual being ready to be satisfied.
I am taking what I want. I come hard, and Rowan fills me from behind, the warmth a new sensation in a new place.
When he finally pulls out of me, he tucks himself beside me and pulls my body into him, holding me close while he tickles my body with gentle strokes as I catch my breath.
“I liked that,” I say after a few quiet minutes.
His low chuckle is followed by his mouth on my shoulder. He bites me softly then kisses my skin.
“I know you did,” he says. “Now come with me. I’m going to bathe you.”
He sits up and drops his feet to the floor before lifting me in his arms and carrying me to the shower. The hot water soothes my aching muscles, and Rowan takes his time lathering my body with burnt amber body wash that smells like him. He leaves me to get dressed while I finish washing my hair.
“What’s on your agenda today?” I ask once I turn the shower stream off. I pull the towel from the hook right outside the shower door and wrap my wet hair in it just as Rowan steps back into the bathroom carrying a pair of cotton gym shorts and one of his old T-shirts.
“Thanks,” I say, my voice gravelly from the lack of sleep.
Rowan shuts the bathroom door and leans his back on it as he drops his hands in the pockets of his jeans. His head falls slightly to one side, a wet tendril of hair falling over his brow as he smirks.
“You’re really beautiful, you know that?” His gaze roams down my body but comes back to my eyes after a few seconds, and the longer he stares into my eyes, the more my body wants to squirm from the attention.
“I don’t know about that, but I’m glad you think so,” I say through a nervous laugh.
“Uh uh,” he says, stepping away from the wall and taking my hand as I finish pulling his shirt down my body. He turns my wrist over to press his mouth against the inside as his gaze flits up to me.
“You’re simply, easily, and naturally beautiful.” His eyes hold mine hostage for a long breath, and my chest shakes with my intake of air.
Biting my lip, I finally let the smile slip through as I bat my lashes.
He makes me feel so nervous. I’m not used to this kind of attention.
I’m more often the strong girl, the good student, or the quiet leader willing to do what’s best for the team.
I’m the confidant that my friends share their secrets with, or the girlfriend who understands when dates are canceled because of family obligations.
I’m not so daft that I don’t know my best attributes.
I’m athletic, and my body has good curves.
It’s lucky, a little genetic, but mostly these things come from years of avoiding my anxieties by taking to the water.