Chapter 13 River
River
Screams erupt all around me and Ray pulls away from me, my body crashing down on the nest beneath me as I writhe in pain, and for the loss of the knot my body craves.
My senses are on overload. There are too many scents- bergamot, lavender, cocoa, chocolate. Too many alphas. Too many knots for me to have, yet no one’s giving them to me.
“Knots, please I need knots,” I whine, trying desperately to ease the ache between my legs.
“What the fuck did you do to my sister?” my brother shouts, just before I hear the crushing sound of skin hitting skin. My mind tells me it’s Storm throwing the punches, but the haze won’t let me believe it.
That’s not right. He’s not here. Storm doesn’t know where I am.
It’s just the haze. “Alpha,” I whine, my hand moving to my pussy as I begin to rub my clit, anything to ease the burn between my thighs.
I need an alpha to sink his cock back inside me, giving me a knot that I’ll be sick over once this haze lifts.
“You’re nothing, little alpha boy,” Miles’ deep voice rumbles, anger bursting from him.
“Little alpha. Took care of that asshole bleeding out on the floor,” Storm taunts him.
My body screams at me, begging to have what it’s being deprived of. A sharp cramp explodes in my stomach and I roll to the side in agony, crying out for someone, anyone as my hand continues to rub feverishly against my clit.
So many scents. None of them are right. Only one familiar. My mind can’t process what’s happening.
Shouting rips through the air, rough and jagged. Then a hard slam shakes the floor like someone hit the ground. Fear rushes through me, and I try to crawl away, but every move sends another wave of pain rolling through me.
I blink, but the haze won’t lift. Shapes smear, faces blur. I can’t tell who’s who — the room’s a mess and my brother’s somewhere in the middle of it. Boots scrape the floor.
Voices coil and mash together, some low and guttural, some high and strained. They all blend until I can’t pull anything out.
A grunt cuts through, wet and sharp, then the dull smack of a fist on flesh. My stomach knots at the sound — I hate the violence spilling around me. I try to crawl away, but the chain rattles on the floor and there’s nowhere to go. I’m trapped..
“Get my sister out of here.” Storm’s voice rises above all the others.
Another shout answers, too close. Fear vibrates in my chest, and I scoot back away from it.
The smell hits me next; sweet, chocolately, but not an alpha.
Omega.
“Shh, River, my name is Torin. I’m a friend of your brother’s and I’m here to help you.”
“No, get away. They're my alphas. I need their knots.” Bile rises in my throat at proclaiming them as mine. But my body so desperately needs them.
“I know,” he whispers softly. “But it’s a little crazy in here right now, and I don’t want you to get hurt. Let me help you get out of here.”
He’s lying. Torin wants them. But I want to leave, to escape from this place that I don’t belong.
“I can’t.” My hand reaches down, taking hold of the chain and holding it up for him to see.
“Fuck,” he curses. “We have a problem. I need a key,” he shouts to someone. “We need to get some clothes on you so I can get you out of here.” I can hear the words. See his lips moving, but I’m not able to process anything. “Don’t move. Stay right here.” He stands and rushes away from me.
I curl into myself, dragging my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around them tightly.
My head is throbbing, and I close my eyes, pressing them tightly together, trying to escape to anywhere but here.
My haze continues to rage, even with the chaos happening around me.
I know when it’s over, my sweet brother will be dead, and it will be my fault.
Each shout, crash, and grunt embeds itself into me until my mind is nothing but splinters. I move my hands to cover my ears, squeezing my eyes tighter, wishing the darkness behind them would swallow everything whole.
But it doesn’t. When I open them all I see is a hazy chaos. Men, and then my brother entangled with Miles, blood covering both of them. Tears burst forth, and before I can even wipe them away, the omega is back in front of me.
“We can’t find the key, but I can cut the chain and then I’m carrying you out of here. Everything is going to be okay.” He tries to reassure me.
He turns his back to me, something metal in his hands. A sudden, hard crack rips through the air. The sound is compact and violent, like a bone cracking.
“Okay.” His breathing is labored as he moves back to me, pulling the shirt over his head and putting it on me. I fight him, not wanting the scent of another omega on me.
“No,” I cry, my arms reaching out trying to remove the wretched clothing from my body. “I want my alphas,” I whine, trying to crawl away from him and get to them so they can ease my pain with their knots.
“Get her the fuck out of here, Torin,” my brother's angry, labored voice shouts.
“I’m trying, man, she’s in heat. She only has one thing on her mind. I’m going to have to knock her out.”
I hear more grunting and then Storm, “Do it.”
“I’m so sorry, River.” I’m so confused about what’s happening until Torin’s hands are around my neck, cutting off my air. “I’m not going to hurt you. I just need you to calm down so I can carry you out of here so they can end this shit.”
My hands reach out trying to push him away, before gripping onto his arms. It’s getting harder to breathe, my vision blurring until there’s nothing.
Just darkness.
***
Buzz…Buzz…
A buzzing sound invades my ear, annoying, but faint. But there’s something behind it. Something familiar. A voice. I concentrate, trying to hone in on the voice.
Storm.
He’s upset. Crying. A deep pressure bears down on my hand, and I want to flinch, to pull away, but I can’t. I’m so tired. But I focus on Storm. On the sound of his voice and the comfort it brings me.
“I failed her,” he sobs. “I shouldn’t have left.”
He’s blaming himself. I want to scream. To tell him he’s wrong. But the words don’t come. No matter how hard I try, my mouth isn’t able to form them. Instead, I stay lingering in this world of murky darkness.
“Do you think it would’ve changed anything?” an unfamiliar male voice speaks.
“You mean, do you think I could have prevented what they did to her?” I hear him break down, crying heavily, before the fog takes hold, lulling me back to sleep.
I don’t know how much time passes. A series of voices floats through my consciousness, their tones calm but urgent, like a conversation just out of reach. I try to pry my eyes open, but they stay stubbornly shut.
“I promise I’ll never leave you again, River.” The pressure is on my hand again. Squeezing it. Gentle but firm.
Slowly, I begin to gain control of my body, my finger twitching.
“River.” Storm's voice rises with excitement.
My mouth feels like cardboard, my eyes flutter, finally opening, the bright light in the room causing me to squint.
My eyes scan the room. It’s a bedroom, not the one I was held captive in, but somewhere else.
Somewhere unfamiliar. A dresser sits against the far wall, a window cracked just enough to allow a cool breeze to flow in.
“Is this a dream? Are you real?” My voice is hoarse, cracking with each word I say.
“Most definitely not a dream.” He leans forward, kissing me gently on my forehead.
A wave of relief rushes over me, but it doesn’t last long as memories rush back to me. I was in heat. But I’m not feeling any of the effects now. Visions of how I allowed them to defile my body, to bond me. That I bonded with one of them.
His face is splotchy, dried tears on his cheek as he smiles brightly at me. My heart breaks when I see the mottled bruising along his cheekbones and his black eye. “You’re going to be okay.”
I nod, but he’s wrong. I’m never going to be okay. Not after this. All I feel is shame, and I hate myself. Instead of fighting, I let them have me.
“How?” I try to swallow, but there’s nothing but dryness as I cough, causing pain to radiate through me. “How…”
“Shh. When I couldn’t get a hold of you and Dad was acting weird, my pack and our friends came with me to find out what was going on.
” He clenches his jaw and takes a deep breath.
“I found him drunk off his ass at home. I beat the hell out of him until he told me what he did. I just wish I would’ve acted sooner.
Got there before they could…” He drops his head so I can’t see his face, but I see the way his shoulders shake.
“Thirsty.” Comes out in a whisper.
He lifts his hand, wiping his face. “I bet you’re hungry too. There’s a lot I need to talk to you about… but after you eat.” He stands up, leans over to brush his hand on the side of my face and places a kiss on my forehead. “I’ll be right back.”
I nod, missing his touch when he lets go. He crosses the room, opens the door and leaves.
The need to pee suddenly takes over, and I carefully ease the covers off of me and sit up.
My head spins with the sudden movement, and I have to brace my hands on the mattress.
I take a few deep breaths to calm myself.
Letting my bare toes dig into the carpet, the coolness is a refreshing shock to my body.
I stand slowly, and move across the room, hoping that one of the doors leads to a bathroom.
I let out a sigh of relief when I see it does. My feet lead me straight to the toilet, where I quickly relieve myself, wincing at the pain. Once I’m done I stand to wash my hands, catching the first sight of myself when I look into the mirror.
All the memories of that night flood through me. They sent me into my heat early. They took my virginity. He marked me. I take hold of the hem of the large shirt I’m wearing and pull it over my head, seeing the bond mark for the first time.
It’s hideous. My eyes tear as I gaze at the teeth mark, murky black with veins spreading from it across my right breast. An Arcane bond. Immoral. Marking me as a living reminder of what was done to me, and making sure no one else will ever want me.
My hand moves before I even realize what I’m doing, opening the medicine cabinet, scanning the contents, looking for the one thing that can ease my pain.
My heart races, hope of the relief drifting away from me when I come up empty.
I turn, leaning my back against the sink as I place my hand over the mark, willing it to disappear.
But it doesn’t. It’s a living reminder. Not a day will go by that I won’t see it.
My eyes drift over to the shower, the corners of my mouth turning up in a smile when I see it.
There, perched on the shelf sitting right beside the bottle of body wash, is a razor.
My legs move on autopilot, heading right for it.
My fingers tremble as I manage to get the small blade out and hold it to my breast, pressing the blade into my skin.
These aren't the same cuts I do to feel something other than the pain of dealing with normal life.
No, this time I want to cut the mark from my flesh, removing the evidence of what was done to me.
I dig the blade in deeper. Cut after cut, my fingers covered in my blood.
I’m taking control.