9
I stare at the photograph of the three of us as the tears stream down my face. I remember that day vividly. It was the last day of our first year of college and we were getting ready to go out and party downtown with some friends. I feel Farrah’s hand on my back as she tries to comfort me, but my sobs now are uncontrollable. I need to get out of here.
“Excuse me,” I say standing from the table. I throw the newspaper down before quickly making my way up the stairs. After I make my way to my room, I crawl onto the king-size bed that faces the bathroom. How was I the lucky one? It doesn’t make sense. None of this makes sense. I bury my face into the pillow and cry loudly as my entire body goes numb from the pain of losing my two dear friends.
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The next morning, I wake to the sun peeking through the sheer curtains. When my eyes eventually flicker open I take notice of Xavier sitting in the chair near the fireplace. He’s looking outside and seems to be in deep thought and doesn’t even notice I’m awake yet. I stare at him for a moment before the realization of yesterday hits me like a ton of bricks. Alex and Grace are dead. The sting fills my body yet again.
Yesterday after breakfast, I came here and cried for the majority of the day. I suppose my body was exhausted from mourning my dear friends because it's now a new day. My stomach growls angrily as I eventually sit up. Xavier’s eyes hold mine. I can’t imagine what I look like.
My eyes feel heavy and swollen from crying. In between my crying sessions yesterday, I tried my best to remember anything about that night that would help me figure out what happened. My last memory is of all of us dancing and laughing at the loud music of the club. Maybe it’s a good thing that was my last clear memory with the two of them.
“Hi,” Xavier says as he uncrosses his legs.
“Hi,” I say as I sit up in bed. I watch as he gives me a sympathetic smile. He walks towards the floor-length windows and peers outside at the beautiful day that’s just begun.
“I just got a call —” He hesitates, still continuing to stare outside.
“I’ll have to go a few hours away, so I won’t be back until tomorrow night most likely,” he adds, still avoiding me.
“Take me with you,” I straighten my posture and his eyes quickly bounce straight into mine.
“Absolutely not.” He shakes his head. I sit on the edge of the bed and notice his eyes drop down to my thighs.
“Xavier —” I pause as my eyes now glance at the ground. My heart races as sadness and heartache quickly inflate my fragile body yet again. I flashback to Alex and Grace in my bedroom the night everything happened. The three of us danced as we put our makeup on and got ready, not knowing that would be our last night together. There was something different about that night though, the closeness that was between the three of us. If I had known it was our last night together—well I honestly wouldn’t have changed a thing. The laughter that filled my bedroom that night, I’ll cherish it forever.
“Take me with you. I need to know what happened that night. I need to —” I pause as my voice begins to give away.
“To get your revenge?” He says, stepping towards me now.
“It’s not as sweet as it may seem. Trust me, Lina, it will haunt you like you couldn’t imagine,” he says brushing his index finger over my bare shoulder. Goosebumps fill my arms quickly as I stare up into his eyes. His outline becomes blurred as emotion slowly takes me over once more. “Please take me with you.” I sternly say as a single tear slowly falls down my cheek.
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Xavier
Lina sits in the passenger seat of the car, staring out the window at the city lights. Carl and a few guards are following close behind us. I try to keep my eyes straight ahead on the road, but they occasionally glance over towards her. As I look at her sitting there with her hands in her lap, so innocent and clueless as to what’s about to happen, I can’t help but feel guilty for agreeing for her to come. She should be home reading a book and not about to see me end someone's life.
“Are you sure you want to be there for this?” I ask, softly. She continues looking out the window and without any hesitation, she nods.
“Yes, Alex and Grace were like sisters to me,” she says. The car ride falls silent for a few minutes.
“You know we met in second grade at recess? They watched one of the boys from our class push me down in the mud.” She chuckles softly, still gazing out the window.
“The two of them tackled him down so fast—before I could even recollect what was happening.” She smiles as her eyes now hold mine.
“The three of us were glued at the hip from that moment on,” She says and I watch as her eyes glisten in the darkness.
“So yes, I’m more than ready to see the bastard that was part of this—die.” Her eyes hold mine and I swallow hard. The rest of the car ride is quiet and eerily calm. We neither look at nor speak to each other again. I think our minds are on overdrive right now. Because if she’s anything like me, there’s an ache in her belly that is telling her something isn’t right. Ominous thoughts begin to creep in as well as numerous scenarios of what’s about to happen. During the long drives, I like to come up with plans for each of those unrealistic scenarios. It keeps my mind focused.
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An hour later we pull up to an abandoned building. I see four of my men standing guard in front of the doors. As requested, they have already brought him here for me. I turn the car off and Lina and I sit there in complete darkness for a moment.
“Open the glovebox,” I tell her and she does. A small handgun falls into her lap.
“Have you used one of those before?” I ask as her eyes hold mine. She slides the top of the glock back, checking the chamber to see if it’s loaded. She turns the safety on and puts it on the back of her waistline.
“My dad and I used to go shooting,” she says with a straight-face. Watching her handle the gun like that does something to me. She’s definitely not like any of the girls I ever dated. I swallow hard as I watch her eyes bounce around the building.
“Are those your men?” She asks and I nod.
“They find them and bring them here. It’s secluded and far away from everything,” I say looking at Carl approaching the front door. I get out of the car and make my way over to her door and exhale hard before I open it.
The two of us make our way towards Carl and the other guards. I can tell by their expressions that they are surprised to see Lina with me. “Right this way, sir,” one of the men says as we trek inside the dimly lit building. Lina walks close beside me as we make our way further in. The sounds of our footsteps echo in the empty halls.
We approach a single door and the other men stand beside it as I look back at Lina. She nods and I open it slowly. As the door opens I see a man tied up to a chair with silver duct tape smeared across his face. The man's eyes widen in horror as he looks past me and straight at Lina.
When I turn to Lina her mouth is unintentionally parted as she stares back at the man in the chair. Do they recognize each other? Did he do anything to her? Anger boils inside me fast as I watch him look at her.
Within seconds Lina’s inches away from him. I watch as she slowly tears the tape from the man's mouth, taking her time. The man’s lips bleed as she throws the tape on the ground.
“Well if it isn’t the little virgin who got away,” he laughs before spitting on the floor. I watch Lina smile as she kneels down closer to his already bruised face. She brushes her finger across his cheek slowly.
“Will you tell me what happened to the two other girls that I was with that night?” She asks nicely. The man’s eyes bounce straight to mine and then back to hers. Silence fills the room for a few minutes as he ignores her question.
“Carl?” I hear Lina say. Within seconds Carl comes into sight. Lina smiles up at him before she stands.
“Can I borrow that?” She points to the knife that Carl has stashed away on his waistband next to his gun. He quietly unfastens it and hands it over to her. She pricks the tip with her finger and a small drop of blood slowly drips down her hand. “Sharp,” she laughs.
“You know, before you took me I was going to college to be a surgeon,” she says as her eyes light up.
“I know all of the veins and major arteries to avoid.” She drags the knife over the top of his hand and I watch her in utter disbelief that this is the same woman who spent all day crying in bed.
“Here.” She pierces the knife in his thigh, and he winces out in pain.
“It’s a tender spot, but if I were to press a little deeper —” She pauses as his cries fill the room. He wiggles around in the chair as she presses the knife deeper into his leg.
“It still wouldn’t kill you,” she laughs softly.
“Look, I know my friends are dead. I just want to know what happened. It’s the least you could do, don’t you think?” she says, still staring down at the guy. He continues ignoring her.
“You’re not leaving here alive.” She pauses, but he still says nothing. I notice her lip begin to quiver and I don’t know if it’s from sadness or anger, but as she stares down at him I see a tear fall down her cheek.
“I promise if you tell me what happened, I’ll make your death quick, but if you don’t I swear I will torture you until your skin and bones,” She goes on. The two of us stand there looking down at the man. Blood now soaking his pant leg.
“They weren’t pure so —” He pauses and Lina’s eyes stay cemented on him as he clears his throat.
“You killed them because they weren’t virgins? You sick piece of shit!" she yells, hitting his chest, making him gasp for air.
“No—” He pants.
“They kept trying to escape to get to you,” he says as his head hangs low.
Lina hastily pulls out the gun from the back of her waistline and points it directly at the man's head. Without even thinking twice, a single gunshot rattles the room. The man’s head falls forward as his body goes limp in the chair. Blood slowly trails down his shoulders then gradually to his knees and eventually onto the ground. Lina’s arm slowly falls to her side as her doleful brown eyes hold mine. Her mouth parts as she stares at the puddle of blood that’s now around her feet. I walk carefully over to her and take the gun away from her hand. She looks at the man one last time before we eventually make our way out of the room. I hold her close as we walk through the dark building and make our way back into the car.
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A few hours later, we arrived home. I opened the door for Lina, and we walked into the warmly lit house. The two of us make our way over to the kitchen. I open the fridge as she takes a seat on the barstool.
“Drink?” I ask.
“Please,” she says softly. I hand her a glass of wine and she chugs it back. “Another,” she hands me back the glass. I fill it up again and she downs it faster than the first time.
“Lina, I think —” I try to say, but she snatches the bottle away from me and begins to pour herself another glass and sips it slowly this time.
“What do you think, Xavier? Please tell me, I’m dying to fucking know!” She yells. I watch as she stares down into the glass of wine as tears fill her eyes again. I grab the wine bottle from her and pour myself a small glass then make my way to the barstool that’s beside her. I take her trembling hand in mine as she lets out a deep breath.
“I shouldn’t have allowed you to come with me,” I say as I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose.
“Xavier, I —” She pauses as her eyes now gaze into mine. My heart races as I wait for her to say something.
“I think what scares me the most is—” Her eyes fill with tears as she takes another sip of her glass.
“There’s not an ounce of me that regrets anything I did tonight,” she says. I watch as tears stream down her face. I wipe them away as her eyes slowly close.
Moments later, I feel her take my hands into hers as her eyes gradually open. “Kiss me again,” She insists as she bites her bottom lip. I quickly take her face into my hands and slide my tongue between her partially open lips. We kiss slowly at first, taking our time and absorbing this moment in its entirety. But, as our kiss deepens I feel her melt into me, knowing she’s safe. I feel her hand grazing the back of my head pulling me harder towards her body.
I lift her onto the counter, taking her face into my hands again. My tongue gently caresses hers as we grip each other tightly. Our fucked-up reasoning for being here in this moment evaporates into thin air as we both pant wanting—no, needing more of each other. My lips make their way from her mouth to her delicate neck. I take her in, tasting the saltiness of her. If I don’t stop now, I don’t think I will be able to.
As hard as it is for me to do, I pull my lips from hers out of breath. I shake my head back and forth disappointed that I let things go as far as they did. But also disappointed that I can’t go there with her. I respect her too much to go there right now.
I exhale hard then draw my lower lip between my teeth. “I’m sorry,” she says, avoiding eye contact. “Why the hell are you sorry? I shouldn’t have—” I try to say, but she takes my hand in hers. “It’s been a long day, I think I should get to bed,” she says, jumping off of the counter. “Good idea,” I say as I lead her up the stairs.