Fifteen
Elle
“This game is totally rigged!” Henry shouts, throwing his hands up.
The white glow from the air hockey table illuminates his body and shows the defined muscles beneath his white t-shirt. It’s a really good look for him.
“Why do I get the feeling you were the kid that went way too hard in gym class?” I reply, retrieving the pucks from the middle of the table.
“I am neither going to confirm or deny if that’s true,” he says, leaning over the table. “Best out of three?”
“Let’s put some money on it, so I can get something out of this except just kicking your butt,” I joke. “Ten bucks if I win the next game.”
“It’s probably not the most gentlemanly thing to agree to taking money from a lady on a date, but my competitive nature is outweighing my manners right now.” His smile sparkles as he pulls out his wallet and places a ten-dollar bill on the table. “Winner gets to keep that.”
“Bring it on, Sanchez,” I say, slapping my own ten-dollar bill on the table and hitting the puck off to the side.
When Henry suggested we go to the arcade tonight, I was pretty surprised. I’ve never been on a “game” date before, and it made me excited to see if this night would show me that Henry is different from other guys.
And it’s true. Henry is different. He makes me laugh.
He’s playful. Our conversations flow naturally.
I smile a lot when I am with him. Overall, he seems perfect on paper.
Perfect for me. He checks all of the boxes on my imaginary checklist. But the whole time I am with him, I am making a mental pro/con list, and I hate myself for it.
Henry deserves better than someone who is making a subconscious comparison in her head.
Which is why when he walks me home that night, I give him a quick kiss on the cheek, and tell him I’ll text him tomorrow.
Because as much as I want to fall for him, I’m afraid my feet have already reached the ground somewhere else.
*
As much as I try to throw myself into being interested in Henry, I find myself more enthusiastic about planning my next New York City adventure with Oliver. My Oliver Cole Elle-ter-vention is in full effect.
The other day, when Oliver told me he didn’t like bugs, my instinct was to scoff at him.
But I didn’t. Because I could see that his concern was genuine.
I thought back to Oliver’s apartment and how immaculate it was.
Coupled with the fact that he can’t wind himself down without hitting the treadmill at 6 a.m., and the brief conversation we had about his family, I’m starting to think that what I assumed was stress from a high-pressure job is actually a lot more complicated.
As big and intimidating as he is, Oliver doesn’t give off a macho man attitude. He’s kind, funny, and sweet. The custom pair of earplugs on my nightstand and his spoiled dog are proof of that. He has quirks, but who doesn’t?
I know anxiety takes a lot of forms, and is different for everyone.
I wish I could come out and ask Oliver what his triggers are, but I don’t want to push too hard.
I want him to trust me enough to show me that side of him.
Now that we’re friends (which the me from a few weeks ago would never believe), I want to understand what goes on in his head.
And I’m not sure if he’s ready to share that with me yet.
Which is why I think yoga will be perfect for him.
We’ve been to the Highline, Hudson Yards, Chelsea Market, pretty much any non-touristy New York places I could think of over the last few weeks. But I think tonight’s expedition is going to be my favorite.
“Hey, before I forget—” Oliver says as we walk towards the West Side Highway. “Can you watch Thor next Sunday when I go to my parents’ house?”
“Only if you say please,” I tease.
“Yeah right, like you would actually say no to spending the day with my dog.” He matches my expression and for a moment, we’re locked in a who knows who better stare off.
Oliver wins when I look down at Thor. He’s got me there.
When my gaze meets his again, he chuckles. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”
“Why don’t you take him with you?”
“It will be quicker if I take the train to Long Island rather than renting a car and driving out there. And I can’t take him on the train,” he explains.
“Then sure, I can watch him.” I lean down to scratch between Thor’s ears. “What’s the occasion?”
“My mom’s birthday,” Oliver replies on an exhale. “Can’t get out of it.” I’m about to ask why he would want to, but he changes the subject. “So, where are we going?”
Thor and I met him at the hospital at the end of his shift.
He was pissed about it, having just worked fourteen hours, but I refused to listen to his complaints.
He can be out one more hour before crashing into bed for the night, and it might actually help him sleep.
It’s the first day shift he’s had in a while, and the change in time frame is wearing on him. I can see it on his face.
He’s still in his scrubs, which honestly, I’m not mad about. It’s a good look. He told me these are clean ones he put on in the locker room, not ones he wore around patients. I didn’t ask, but he told me all the same. He’s very conscious of germs like that.
“Pier 97. It’s going to be beautiful tonight, and I think you’ll love it.”
“And why did it have to be tonight? Why couldn’t it be a day when, I don’t know, I didn’t just keep people alive for seventeen million hours?”
“Because, you whiner, seeing a New York City sunset is a rite of passage. And tonight’s is supposed to be epic.
” I resist the urge to put my arm through Oliver’s so we can walk down the street in tandem.
Friends don’t do that. Friends just walk next to each other.
“It can feel a bit dark around the city sometimes,” I continue.
“And it’s good to remember that there’s a beautiful world out there, one that doesn’t smell like garbage. ”
“And the sunset helps us do that, how?”
“By reminding us that we’re small in the grand scheme of things, even though this island feels like a world within itself,” I say, looking up at the sky.
“Very profound, Miss. Yogi Master,” Oliver says, nudging me with his elbow.
“That’s not yoga. Just my obsession with looking up. Stars, sunsets, they’re my thing.” I shrug.
“How come?” he asks, following my gaze up to the sky.
I let out a calming breath before responding. “I love when I look up at the sky and I’m reminded that we’re on a planet with ten billion people, in a universe that is bigger than we can even imagine. I like the perspective.”
I get a bit of a pep in my step as I talk.
Oliver grabs my shoulders and pulls me closer to him so I don’t collide with another person while I’m preaching about my sky theories, but even after they’ve passed he doesn’t let go instantly.
It’s another movement that feels so natural.
I try to remain as casual as possible when he finally releases me, and fall back into a natural walk, as if that didn’t just happen.
“Plus, I’ve always loved astrology,” I add, trying to hide the hitch in my voice from the unexpected contact. “If we ever leave the city, I can show you how I go full nerd on my Sky View app.”
“Do I want to know what that is?”
“It’s an app that lets you hold your phone up to the sky and see all the constellations!” I whine. I can’t believe he’s never heard of it. “And when the planets are visible, it is so cool!”
“Wow,” Oliver says, feigning sarcasm. He pauses for a moment, before adding, “How come you’re so interested in that kind of stuff?”
“How come you’re so interested in the gym?” I challenge, mimicking his question. I can’t tell if he’s being sincere or making fun of me.
“I was trying to give you a compliment, Eloise,” he says, barely able to say Lucy’s nickname for me without cracking a smile.
“It didn’t sound like one.”
“Well, it’s not every day that you meet someone who can name the constellations and talk about the effect the lunar phases have on the tides.”
“Still waiting for the compliment,” I murmur, gently knocking into him.
“It’s impressive, that’s all. You and your yoga and the deep-seeded musings on the universe. You’re kind of brilliant,” he says with a shrug. We make eye contact for a second, but he quickly looks away.
I’m not sure what to make of that comment. “Thank you, I guess.”
We walk in companionable silence for a while before I speak again.
“And because of my brother, I think.” Oliver scrunches his brows.
“To answer your question about why I’m interested in it.
I mean, I always liked it on my own, but I loved teaching Nicky about the stars and the moon.
It made him so happy.” I don’t realize I’m smiling until I see a soft smile on Oliver’s face as well.
I lead us to the pier, which is a long building that stretches out into the Hudson.
There are some public spaces, playgrounds, a few sports courts, and grassy areas for people to lounge on.
Oliver and I stop for ice cream at one of the markets, and take it out to the end of the pier with us.
I get a bit of déjà vu. I was eating ice cream with another guy recently, and it felt very different.
Part of me really wants to understand why Oliver only wants to be my friend.
I don’t want to sound conceited, but I do think he is attracted to me.
The way he looks at me sometimes, I can see there is something more behind his eyes.
I think about our moment in the coffee shop doorway, how being close to him made me…
breathless. I can’t be making that up, can I?
But if he is attracted to me, why would he want me to go out with his best friend?
Why would he tell me that Henry is the best guy he knows?
Honestly, it’s all a bit confusing, and I’m not sure how to handle it.
It’s one of those times when having my own hype girl would be helpful.
My heart aches when I think of Lucy. I miss my friend.