Chapter 19
Clover
I’m asleep on a mountain of fur, dreaming about doing more than just tasting King Lix’tuk’s seed, when he nudges me awake with the edge of his boot.
“Get up,” he commands. “Go make breakfast.”
“Okay,” I sigh, wiping my eyes.
He walks out of the room like he didn’t make me come on his tongue over and over before we went to sleep.
My body is still tingling. I’m still damp between my legs.
I’m not desperate the way I was yesterday.
My dream may have more to do with it than what happened last night.
But I still wish he’d at least acknowledge we didn’t turn out the lights and go to sleep like strangers.
I guess it didn’t mean anything to him. He was dealing with a problem.
His tongue was nothing but a merciful way of making me come because I was stupid enough to taste his seed.
He said I taste like the salt of the earth he ruined.
I guess even the way I taste reminds him of all the reasons he hates humans.
I walk to the kitchen and start making blackroot coffee. Black sludge for him. Milky brown sludge for me. I still can’t drink much of it, but I’ve come to enjoy starting my day with a boost of energy. I just wish I had more to do with it than wander around Zrogmul and read books in the library.
He’s waiting at the table. He doesn’t say anything when I put down our coffees, nor does he say anything when I return with our breakfast. He starts eating as soon as I put his fork down, and I place my fire bread next to his piece. He doesn’t acknowledge that either.
I’m used to silent meals with him. He’s an orc of few words when he wants to be. I guess he’s used to the silence. I’m the one who has invaded his sanctuary. Not that I had a say in it. I’m just a gift.
“Food will be delivered today,” he growls, sipping his coffee. “Cleaners will be here, too. You will have to find somewhere to entertain yourself other than the library while they’re in there.”
“Oh, you’re having guests?” I ask, my eyes widening a little.
I’m not sure whether I should be excited or terrified.
“Not guests. Just orcs I have to tolerate. I’ll be in my throne room or my office while they’re here. They know not to disturb me,” he sounds dismissive of the lot of us.
“Okay, I’ll stay out of their way,” I acquiesce, eating a bite of cheesy eggs.
He’s the king. If he doesn’t want to greet his visitors, then he doesn’t have to.
Just like he can sit here in silence, eating his breakfast, without ever mentioning what happened last night.
He did things to me that should have my face as red as my backside was last night, but I guess it’s just another day for him.
Once he’s done with his meal, including my piece of fire bread, he downs the rest of his bitter blackroot brew and stands up. I watch until he gets to the door, and while I know I should just keep my mouth shut, the words come out anyway.
“I really enjoyed what you did last night,” I say apprehensively, my voice low. “I would have also enjoyed making sure you went to sleep feeling the same way I did.”
“Why? So you could lick your fingers again when you were done, like a naughty little human girl who needs to be told to keep her tongue in her mouth?” he retorts. “Force me to spend another night tasting your salty sweetness?”
“I can’t force you to do anything, King Lix’tuk,” I sigh, looking down at my plate. “But I’d like to be… useful to you.”
“You revive my food and put it on the table,” he returns. “You’re useful.”
That stings. More than the Reparations Penalty. It might as well have been the crack of a whip, just somewhere that doesn’t show scars like my skin.
“You know what I meant,” I say meekly. “I’m going to be here with you for the rest of my life. Possibly the rest of yours. Unless you send me away. I mean, I know you can… even if I was a gift…” My words trail off, a tear gathering in the corner of my left eye. I blink it away.
“I have no intentions of sending you away,” he says quietly, still facing the door, one step away from it opening. An orc-sized step, at least. “If you need to feel useful, fine. Tonight, when we go to bed, you can touch me.”
It’s such a strange thing to feel grateful for. Like a tiny crack in the orc king’s armor, just enough for me to feel safer. He doesn’t plan on sending me away anytime soon. And he’ll let me touch him. Just so I’ll feel useful. But there’s more to it than that. There has to be.
He takes another step forward and the door opens. He glances back, his dark gaze settling on me.
“And Clover?”
“Y-Yes?”
“You don’t have to worry if you get any in your mouth this time,” his words seems to contain a warning. “I have every intention of tasting you again.”
He walks out of the room, and every footstep seems to make the blush creep further up my neck until my face is red. I swallow a gulp, look down, and then… I smile. That’s not just a crack in the armor. He might as well have taken it all the way off.
I’m not expecting romance. I grew up knowing that was never in my future. I just need to feel like I have some small place here. Even if he doesn’t want me around, at least knowing he can tolerate my existence feels like a place to start.
He wants to taste me again. If all I am is salty sweetness on his tongue, then I can accept that. Either way, I’ll definitely make sure he doesn’t go to bed groaning again with a tented loincloth. That, at least, is a problem I know how to solve.
I don’t finish all my breakfast, but I eat my eggs, because they’re still my favorite. Especially the ones here. After I clean the kitchen and put away yesterday’s dishes, I step out into the hallway, and my eyes widen with concern.
There are at least a dozen orc women in the hallway.
They’re all wearing black and white uniforms that seem to show too much skin, but I’m not sure what orc women normally wear.
Some have brooms and are sweeping the floors.
Others are using a stick with feathers to dust the paintings.
One is carrying buckets filled with some sort of cleaning agent, based on the smell.
They all stop when they see me.
“So, this is King Lix’tuk’s new pet?” an orc woman says, walking closer to me. She puts her hands on her hips and glares like she’s looking at some nasty scum she needs to clean up. “I didn’t think King Lix’tuk liked humans.”
“King Lix’tuk?” one of the younger women says. “He hates humans. I’m surprised he hasn’t already whipped this one.”
I pull my dress tighter around my body. I didn’t really put it on properly, since I was in a hurry to make breakfast, so it’s barely hanging on my frame. I planned to take a shower after breakfast, since I didn’t take one last night.
“Yeah, she should still be bleeding in the dungeon,” another one laughs.
“I’ll stay out of your way,” I whisper, darting toward the bathroom.
I don’t know if they have keys or not, but there’s a lock on the door, so I use it. None of them follow me or rattle the handle, so I take a moment to breathe. I guess it’s not just King Lix’tuk who dislikes humans.
But I’m not going to stand in the hallway and be laughed at. They won’t be here forever. I just need to make myself scarce until they’re gone.
That proves to be more difficult than I imagine. I take my shower. I get dressed for the day. But no matter where I go, I don’t get to linger there long before one of the housekeepers shows up. Sometimes they point. Sometimes they laugh. I’m definitely a source of entertainment for them.
I tolerate it as long as I can, but once I overhear a few vulgar jokes while trying to find somewhere new to hide, I’m nearly in tears. My conversation with King Lix’tuk opened my emotions up, and now they’re a little raw. Probably what orcs call weakness.
After they’re done in the kitchen, I try to hide in there, but then the food delivery begins. Two hulking orcs pushing carts. They don’t point or laugh like the housekeepers. They look at me like they want to eat me or… no, that’s not hunger for food. I know enough now to recognize the difference.
“Um, excuse me, I’ll get out of your way,” I say hurriedly, then rush out of the kitchen.
There are still housecleaners everywhere. I thought there were only a dozen or so, but I think that wasn’t even half of them. After more giggles, pointing, and a few jokes, I duck into the one place I know they won’t be. King Lix’tuk’s throne room.
The door closes behind me, and I’m greeted by silence. He’s not on his throne, so he must be in his office. Good. I didn’t want to disturb him, I just need somewhere with no orcs except the one who admitted he’s going to taste me again.
Except I disturb him anyway. Because I barely get a chance to wipe my eyes before he walks out of his office.
“Is there a problem, little human girl?” he asks, folding his arms across his armored chest.
“No, no problem at all,” I say, sniffling, doing my best not to appear weak. “I’m okay. I just got overwhelmed because I’m not used to seeing so many orcs in Zrogmul.”
“Were any of them bothering you?” his voice holds a hint of threat.
“No, I mean… No, it’s fine,” I stumble with my words, forcing a smile. “I didn’t mean to disturb you. I’ll go back to the library. Maybe they’re done cleaning it.”
I turn to leave but a growl of disapproval stops me in my tracks.
“Little human girls who tell lies don’t get to touch me,” he chides. “I can tell you’re not fine. Just tell me what they did.”
I swallow a sigh and turn back to face him. Some color creeps up my neck. I don’t want to look weak, but maybe I am. I guess I have no choice but to tell him. Then he can judge my weakness or dismiss me.
“It wasn’t anything bad, really. Just pointing. Laughing. A few jokes…” I sigh, feeling foolish for bothering a king with something so small. “I just got overwhelmed, like I said.”
“Wait here,” he orders, walking past me.
I whine a protest but there’s no way for me to stop him.
He walks out of the throne room, and I hear his voice booming in the hallway.
I can’t make out what he’s saying. Eventually, the booming stops.
A few seconds later he comes back into his throne room and there’s anger in his eyes, but it softens when he sees me.
“They won’t bother you again,” speaking almost gently.
“I didn’t mean to cause trouble,” I answer him quietly.
“You didn’t. They just needed to be put in their place. Now they have been,” he says, stopping behind me and smacking my ass hard.
“Hey!” I shriek, spinning around, immediately regretting my impertinent reaction. If he wants to smack my ass, he can smack my ass. What can I do about it?
“I’ll put you in your place tonight after dinner,” he warns, continuing past me. “Don’t lie to me again, little human girl. That’s almost as foolish as running away.”
He says it like the lie matters more than the tears.
He walks into his office and the door closes. Not completely. It seems to be broken or just stuck open. I watch him through it for a few seconds, then turn around.
I guess I’m getting another spanking tonight. Not for showing weakness, but for not being honest about it. He said after dinner, too. That means we’re going straight to his bedchamber again.
When I walk out into the hallway, none of the orc women make eye contact.
They divert their gaze, look away, and a few whisper apologies as I pass.
One of the younger housekeepers is crying silently while she dusts a painting.
Another is on her knees scrubbing the floor by hand, her green face pale.
The hallway is quieter than it’s been all morning. They got scolded by a king who lives in isolation and doesn’t even let them clean his throne room. I guess that was even more shocking than seeing me.
Maybe I do have a place here.
I just have to figure out where it is.