Chapter 17
Chapter
Seventeen
MIRANDA
M iranda waited until Govek was out of sight before going to the edge to watch him, then she breathed a sigh of relief when she saw him drop onto the slim bank far below. Safe and sound. She ducked back before Govek could look up and see how close she’d gotten to the ledge. He hated when she got close.
But the view was absolutely stunning , and it was difficult for her not to linger.
The positioning of the falls where they’d made their camp was a little dangerous. They were on a cliffside halfway up the waterfall. The glittering crystalline water plummeted from a ledge twenty feet above her and crashed into a deep pool nearly forty feet below. The cliffside seemed stable enough, Govek had examined it to make sure, but mist from the falls made everything around a little slick.
That mist also sprayed up, casting rainbows in almost every patch of sunlight that streamed through the trees. Gray-blue rocks covered with bright green moss framed the banks. They were offset by the bright red foliage of the trees surrounding them.
The rushing water itself was rapid, vivid, and loud . It helped clear her mind and eased her into relaxing.
Govek had built them a makeshift camp, and they had come up here from dawn till dusk for the last three days. He’d created a lean-to using sticks and animal furs, so they had a dry place to protect from the wind and falling leaves. The campfire had a tall wall of stones circling it to keep loose embers at bay. He’d even collected some of the moss into thick piles and covered them with soft deer hides so they had beds to nap on. And do other things...
Her chest warmed, and she suddenly wished he would hurry with the fishing.
The number of fish they’d eaten was out of hand. She almost felt bad about it. Govek’s skills with a spear would single-handedly cause the small trout to be extinct.
And yet, every day he would climb back up the cliff with a dozen more, like it was nothing. Green abs glistening from mist and sweat. Damp shirt sticking to his skin, accentuating his arms. Eyes glistening with pleasure when he saw her waiting.
He really was the best distraction.
“Fades have mercy .”
Miranda jolted to her feet and whirled around, scampering further away from the edge of the cliff just to be certain she wouldn’t slip.
And closer to the newcomer.
A bald white orc with misty eyes and a slender build stood at the edge of the tree line, scowling and muttering.
The seer. The seer was here. At their camp.
He let out another foul curse and then turned back to the woods.
“W-wait!” Miranda hurried toward the white male before he could escape. “Seer, wait!”
“Get away from me. I told you, you’re too much .”
“Too much what?” She’d been waiting for a chance to find her way back into the clan for days just so she could find this male and now here he was. Right in front of her! “Please, can’t you tell me? I could fix it.”
“There’s nothing to fix . You aren’t supposed to be here.”
Before Miranda could stop him, he turned and disappeared back into the forest. Her mind worked rapidly. Govek would fume if she went after the seer right now, but dang it, she needed to talk to him.
Making Govek upset would just have to be the price she paid.
Before she could even reach the tree line, the seer was walking back into the clearing. He froze, white eyes blinking slowly.
“I’m back, aren’t I?”
“Yeah, you are,” Miranda said, somewhat breathlessly.
“ Fuck .” The seer nearly snarled making his way over to the fire. “Give me some food.”
“Uh...” Miranda went to Govek’s bag and dug through it, producing the hardened bread. “Here.”
“Set it there,” the seer muttered, pointing to a rock nearby.
“Can you... see?” Miranda asked as she sat it down.
What were the extent of the seer’s powers?
Would he really be able to tell her what happened to the children at Riverside Daycare?
She wrung her hands. Her desperation for answers gripped her so hard that she saw stars.
“Did you honestly just ask me if I could see ?” the male asked, voice clipped. Then he cursed, snapping his hands to his bare head, gripping hard enough to bruise.
“Are you okay?” Miranda said, hurrying over, but she was careful not to touch him.
“What do you think?” the male snapped. Miranda somehow managed to stay silent.
Silence seemed to be the right approach because the seer snatched up the bread and took a bite. His shoulders relaxed. His palm pressed into his forehead. “This is horrible.”
“Yeah, sorry. Govek is catching fish right now. We’d be happy to let you stay and eat.”
“I don’t want to be around you one split of a moment longer.”
Her stomach dropped, “What did I do wrong? Can you tell me that much at least?”
The seer paused, fingers digging into the lump of bread, white eyes lingering toward the fire. She wondered if he could see the light of it or maybe he just felt the warmth. He finally sighed, long and hard.
“I apologize . Things with that blasted fool of a warlord aren’t—thank you for the bread. I won’t be finishing it. Do you want it back?”
“No, it’s fine. You can keep it.”
“Are you certain? You could likely use this as a weapon. Use it to fend off those desperate fools pining and plotting away in the hall. Though I suppose Govek does that for you, doesn’t he?”
Miranda straightened. “Wait, what? What do you mean, plotting ?”
“I’m sure you noticed . Most of the Rove Wood fools are desperate for new women. All they have are those humans from Oakwall who’ve known them their entire lives. Why do you think Tavggol took the risk of sparking peace with Clairton?”
Miranda’s brow furrowed. “Are you saying that the Rove Wood orcs are plotting to separate me and Govek?”
“Do birds squawk?” the seer muttered. “Some are too scared, and some are smart enough not to try, but there are a few shallow idiots that think themselves so lofty you would never refuse them.”
“Which ones?” Miranda asked, wanting to avoid them.
“I’ll tell you if you let me go.”
“Let you go? I’m not holding you here.”
“Your desperation to dredge is,” he muttered, tossing away the hunk of bread.
“Really?” Miranda inched a little closer.
“Oh no, you don’t. You sit there .”
Miranda glanced to where he was pointing. “Uh... that’s off the cliff.”
“We’re next to a cliff ?”
“Yeah, the falls are over?—”
“I’m blind, not deaf. I can hear the falls. I thought we were at the bottom . For fuck’s sake, are the Fades trying to kill me?” The seer stalked back toward the tree line, and this time, Miranda stayed put. “All I want is to get to that blasted hall so I can have a half-decent meal and the Fades tip me around and put me here . They want me to be in agony and starve to death is that?—”
He broke off with a hiss. Doubled over.
Miranda hurried forward. “Are you okay? Do you need?—?”
“I’m fucking blistering, ” the seer raged. “ Get —wait. Don’t move.”
Miranda froze.
“Just... wait.” He took a hesitant step forward and breathed deep. Miranda chewed her lip.
He continued moving toward her. Each step made tension grow in her chest. She watched the male’s hands, her own shaking as they continued to wring her skirt.
Just a touch and this would be over.
Her lip trembled. She didn’t know how she was so certain touching this male would solve the problem, but she did . And god, it was everything she could do not to run forward and grasp hold until she finally found out what had happened to her babies.
The seer hissed sharply and began to walk away, then froze again, groaned.
“For fuck’s sake, get yourself under control .”
Miranda stepped toward him. “W-what do you mean?”
“Your grief . It’s maddening. Muddling. You must stop .”
Her grief? “I... can try. If I can be distracted, I’ll?—”
The male hissed again. “Fine. Fine . I admit there is something, but I cannot dredge it now . You aren’t ready.”
“What do I have to do to get ready?”
“I don’t blasted know.” He gripped his head again. “They won’t stop screaming long enough for me to figure it the fuck out.”
“Screaming? Who’s screaming?”
“ The Fades .”
The... Fades? But weren’t they supposed to be asleep?
“Ha! I wish they slept. Would give me a reprieve from their endless wailing.”
Her eyes widened, shock making her cold. “Can you read minds ?”
“I read what the Fades allow.” He slumped further. “And right now, that is mostly constant agonizing screams.”
Miranda’s chest tightened as she wondered what it was like to be constantly hearing tortured screams in your head.
“Your pity is kind, but you should save it for your male. Sit down there, Miranda. And clear up your mind.”
“Clear my mind? Of what?”
“Of everything. I need it cleared so I can dredge , so the Fades will let me fucking go to the hall and get breakfast.”
Oh. Miranda chewed her lip. She had no idea how to do that. The memories of Earth were constant. Endless. Even when she was distracted by a task, they hovered in the back of her brain, ready to pounce. To grind her up into a pile of useless mush. To drown her in her fear and regret and horrible guilt .
“ Hush. ”
Miranda’s back went straight. The seer’s hum sounded so much like Govek it was almost terrifying.
“I was trying to soothe, not startle . This isn’t going to work. It’s too thick. I can’t clear it. You have to.”
“But...” Miranda didn’t know what to do. Nothing made sense.
How was she supposed to overcome the horrors of Earth on her own? The seer was supposed to be the one helping her with that. He was the one that would show her what happened to her babies. Tell her they’d survived. That they were okay with their parents. Unhurt. Wandering Faeda and waiting for her to find them.
“Ah, that was it then.” The seer stood.
“What?” Miranda scrambled to her feet as he began to walk away. “Wait, where are you going?”
“That is what I was meant to say here. You need to clear your mind. Until then, I cannot help you.”
“But I don’t know how to do that.” Miranda’s stomach twisted.
“That isn’t my problem,” he said, and Miranda almost crumbled, begging, when he paused. His brow smoothed. His expression eased.
The seer looked so young . He couldn’t have been much older than her, but there were dark bags under his eyes, his cheeks were hollow, and his body was too thin.
He’d clearly weathered horrible storms.
Just how long had he been riddled by agony? Used as a tool of the Fades? Was there even a light at the end of the tunnel for him, or was death going to be his only reprieve?
His expression softened more. “You are far too kind , Miranda. Be careful who you offer it to.”
“Do you mean Govek?”
“Fades, no. That male came back here for you. He deserves every scrap of kindness you willingly throw his way. I mean, the males in the clan. The ones who would see your kindness and twist it into what they want.”
“Who?” Miranda asked.
“Best I not say. It will muddle things.”
“Muddle what?”
But the seer only turned away again. “My task here is done and your male is approaching. We’ll cross paths again, Miranda. Fades be.”
The male walked off into the woods and disappeared just before Govek burst up from the edge of the cliff, no spear in hand, his face a mask of anger.
“Where the fuck is he?”
“He’s gone,” Miranda said, seeing no reason to deny it. You can’t hide smell. “He went that way.”
Govek almost bounded into the woods before Miranda interrupted his charge. “You really going to leave me alone?”
He stopped short. Breathed hard. Stormed back over to her side. “Come here.”
She let him pick her up and plunk her down on a boulder. His hands stroked her limbs. “Did he hurt you?”
“No. I would have screamed if he’d tried.”
Govek took a few deep breaths.
“Govek, I didn’t call the seer here. He showed up on his own.”
Govek raked a hand through his hair and squeezed his eyes shut.
“He somehow found me out here, even though he was headed for the hall. That says something, doesn’t it?” She cupped Govek’s face. “It’s what I’m supposed to do, but you still have doubts somehow, don’t you?”
“It’s dangerous , Miranda,” Govek rumbled, leaning in, caging her.
“You think everything is dangerous where I’m concerned.” She scratched gently at his scalp, relishing the warm, pine scent of him. “Even you .”
“I am dangerous, Miranda.”
“But dangerous things can also be necessary ,” Miranda pointed out, willingly barreling right into the topic that had been a constant form of strife for days. “Like finding my babies and bringing them back here to Rove Wood Clan.”
Govek growled low in his throat. “Miranda.”
“I’m not going to stop arguing about this, Govek,” she said firmly, “I understand you think it’s not safe to leave the Rove Woods?—”
“It isn’t. ”
Miranda took a deep breath. “I only want to leave long enough to find my babies.”
“Leaving for any amount of time is too risky, Miranda.”
She huffed out a breath of irritation. “Look, I know I sound crazy. I really do. I know I have no proof that they’re even out there. But my gut is telling me that the seer knows something about them. Something that will... help.”
Something that would take away the agony of wondering if they were screaming for her. Something that would stop her mind from getting stuck on the image of them suffering, crushed and burned. Something that would ease the horrific, bone-gnawing, gut-heaving guilt that she had been the one to live.
And they had?—
No. They hadn’t .
They were here. On Faeda. She just had to find them.
“What if we got someone else to go?” Govek asked softly, breaking her out of her thoughts.
Her brow furrowed. “Someone else? What do you mean? I thought you said none of the orcs or humans here ever leave. And I highly doubt Karthoc or his warriors are going to help unless you become the chief.”
Govek sighed heavily, looking off into the woods so he wouldn’t have to meet her eyes, and then said. “Viravia used to be a traveling trader.”
“Oh yeah. I think I remember that being mentioned when I was at her house.” Miranda tapped her chin. “So, you think she might know someone willing to help find my babies?”
“Not help.” He breathed deep, and she felt the exhale rustling her hair, tickling. “With enough boons, I believe we could convince someone to fetch them for us while we stayed here.”
“Govek,” Miranda said warningly. “That’s not going to work. What if he gets the wrong ones? I’m the only one who would recognize any of them. And I’m the only one they would know to trust.”
“You could give the tracker information that only you would know. And describe the children to them so he knows he has the right ones.”
“But that’s?—”
“Miranda, I do not believe you are comprehending just how insurmountable it will be to find them with both the humans and orcs working against us. And although I have the maps, I have never been further out than Clairton. I have no allies, no knowledge of the terrain, no idea where there is even solid hunting or foraging ground.”
Miranda shifted uncomfortably, mind quailing against his logic. “But... they are my responsibility. I’m supposed to find them.”
“Miranda, you said before that you feel you are supposed to save them. Part of saving them is also preparing Rove Wood Clan for their arrival, yes? How can you do that when you are searching all of Faeda for them? You’ll bring them back here to an abandoned clan that has not been maintained over the harsh winter.”
She hated that he had a point and hit a low blow in retaliation. “An abandoned clan and a village of humans you’re on bad terms with.”
Govek growled and looked away again. “I don’t need to be on good terms with Oakwall.”
“For the last time, Govek you do . You absolutely do. You need community too. What if you got hurt and needed a healer?” He gave her a dubious look, and she amended. “Fine, what if I got hurt, and you tried to get me help and the residents of Oakwall turned you away at the gate?”
His expression turned stricken. It should not have made her feel so triumphant.
Govek looked away. Into the woods. Only the slight rustling of the wind in the crisp autumn leaves broke the tension as he thought.
She had to change his mind. She didn’t want to do this without him. She didn’t want to face the prospect of leaving him to find her babies.
But she would have to if he didn’t come around.
“A compromise then.”
Her heart thundered.
Govek met her gaze. “I will go to the trade with you in two days’ time and try to mend the bridge with Oakwall if you agree to ask Viravia if she knows a tracker who could help find your Earth children for us.”
Miranda’s heart was skittering all over itself and her guts twisted up so harshly she thought she might vomit. “How can you be sure that Viravia would even know anyone? How do you know we could trust them if she does?”
“Viravia has never betrayed this clan. She never would. The life of her son depends on the stability of these woods.”
His voice was cold and quiet and reminded Miranda that the clan was now facing a merger. She knew it weighed on Govek greatly, thinking about his nephew growing up at Baelrok.
But he’d also never once said he’d be willing to take on the role of chief to prevent that from happening.
She pressed a palm to her forehead. Things were so fricking complicated .
“Do we have a deal, Miranda?”
Did they? Her head ached as she went over all the moving parts.
There was no guarantee that Viravia would know a tracker. If she did, Miranda could still find a way to convince Govek to let her go with him to find her babies when the time came.
And they needed to get on friendly terms with Oakwall, regardless.
“Okay.” Miranda nodded. “We have a deal.”
Govek’s relief was so clear on his face that it transformed him. It smoothed out all the stress lines between his eyes, loosened his jaw. A wide, devilish grin broke across his face that made her stomach flip. Warmth spread through her, and she leaned into kiss his nose, his cheeks, his soft lips.
His expression had turned tender when she pulled away and it made her want to melt.
“Okay,” Miranda said softly. “So, first step I guess is having dinner with Viravia tonight and asking her if she knows someone who can help find my babies.”
Govek nodded slowly.
“And then day after tomorrow we go to the trade. Do you have anything you want to do to prepare? Should you hunt for it, so we have a peace offering?”
All the contentment in Govek’s expression fell away, and he was back to looking stricken. He raked a hand through his hair and sat back away from her.
“Govek, it’s okay. I know this isn’t going to be easy for you. I’ll do everything I can to support you.”
“Thank you,” he said softly. A quirked smile played at his lips. “It’s... odd to have someone on my side in this. I never have before.”
Her heart fluttered even as her stomach twisted.
“We will have to be very careful with how we proceed,” he explained. “They have the leverage necessary to issue a judgment against me. And if they do that... it will bring the worst upon us.”
“A judgment?”
Govek took a deep breath. “That is how Rove Wood Clan deals with disputes. They hold judgments, where the clan votes on the guilt of the transgressor and decides on a punishment.”
“Sounds a bit like what we did on Earth.”
“If Oakwall calls for a judgment over the accusations against Yerina, I would be severely punished.”
“Only if you’re found guilty, right?” He blinked in surprise, and she said slowly, “You said you didn’t hurt her.”
“I did not. But I have never been found innocent, Miranda.”
She went cold. “Never? How many times have you been the transgressor of these judgments?”
“Many times.”
“And... how many times were you found guilty when you were innocent?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
Anger flashed to cover her pity. “Govek, it absolutely does. I can’t believe they would find you guilty of things you didn’t do.”
“I technically did all the things that I was called to face judgment for.” He looked away. “Just not to the extent that was described during the hearing.”
“So, what? You threaten someone and then they say you actually attacked?” Govek’s eyes told her everything she needed to know. She sucked in a hard breath. “And then what? You mentioned punishment.”
“Typically, it was a period of banishment and binding. My home was already on the outskirts, so I was magically bound against any violence and not allowed to step foot in the clan for a few seasons,” Govek admitted.
Miranda shook her head. “A few seasons? If you couldn’t commit any violent acts, how did you hunt?”
“I . . . didn’t.”
“Then how did you get food, Govek? Since you weren’t allowed in the clan, you weren’t able to get to the storeroom...” she broke off thinking of the bread.
He made it entirely of things he foraged out here in the woods.
Miranda’s stomach dropped, and her chest tightened. She clutched the loose fabric of Govek’s pants and forced him to step closer to the boulder, to lean down so she could wrap her arms around his neck in a tight hug.
He sagged against her, wrapping her up in return. He squeezed slightly before trailing his hands down her back and cupping under her ass, lifting her off the boulder so he could hold her close. He pressed his forehead to hers. His eyes were squeezed shut and her chest felt like a hollow pit.
“I’m so sorry, Govek,” she whispered, cupping his face in her hands, stroking the hinge of his jaw.
“It is my fault, Miranda. I should not have threatened violence. It is not the way of Rove Wood Clan.”
No, the way of Rove Wood Clan was to alienate and pass judgment, to place blame without knowing all the facts, and to look down on others simply for the way they looked or how they were born.
It sounded far too close to Earth’s atrocities. The purpose behind Earth’s wars .
She would not let them get away with it.
“We should ask Viravia about the trade tonight.”
“What do you mean?”
Miranda leaned back to look Govek in the eye. “We’re going to ask her how exactly Oakwall feels about you. I don’t believe that everyone thinks you hurt Yerina.”
“Miranda—”
“Govek, they had a whole season to pass judgment on you and they didn’t. That has to mean something, right?”
Govek said nothing, but his expression was doubtful.
“We’re going to ask her. It can’t hurt,” Miranda said. “And then we’ll just have to do our best at the trade. If the clan wants to hold a judgment against you, then so be it. They can’t banish you if they aren’t here to uphold it, anyway.”
Govek paused. “That’s... true.” He met her eyes with a nod. “We will ask and I will try.”
Triumph burst in Miranda’s chest, and she kissed him hard. “Thank you, Govek. I promise it will be worth it.”
He nuzzled against her cheek and took another deep breath.
“It already is.”