Chapter 20
Adriel's POV
Another day.
Of the same God-forsaken thing.
I sit up from my bedroll with a loud groan, running my fingers through my long hair. Hunched over, I drape my arms over my raised knees. My head falls forward between my legs, and I groan.
My existence was always tolerable. Until now.
When Rami entered my life and showed me how freedom could look.
And the image was intoxicating; wrapped up in such a desirable package.
Either Fate sent him to be my salvation or to taunt me.
I wasn’t sure which he was yet and whether my heart would survive it.
Ludo saunters over from his little nest by my bedroll and stares up at me from between my legs.
Knowing there’s work to be done and little point in me focusing on things I cannot have, I push up from the floor and slip on my shirt.
Staring down at the ties and primitive clasps, I wonder if I could procure one of the lighter blouses Rami seems to be so fond of.
They hug his delicate frame beautifully, and he has never once complained about getting hot in them.
That’s if he ever returns to me.
Not bothering to comb out my tangled hair, I twist it into a ball at the back of my head and use one of my sharpened bone spikes to hold it in place.
Glancing down at my little animal familiar, I decide now is as good a time as any to get on with my evening. He climbs into my waiting hand so I can carry him into the warm night. The sight that greets me is enough to make me freeze in my tracks.
Rami has divided one of my larger plants and is adding it to the end of the row of flowers. The loose plant is sitting on its side while he prepares the hole and delicately buries it in line with the others.
But that’s not what steals my breath. Rami has divested himself of his blouse, and the last remnants of the setting sun create alluring shadows along his slender frame.
I can’t rip my gaze from the way his muscles work beneath his tanned flesh.
Not until the last vestiges of the dying sun fade completely.
Even after centuries of being forced to hone my night vision, I can barely see him, and I hate it.
Lifting the hand without Ludo in it, I channel the aether around me to create the golden aura around my fingers.
It tickles along my flesh until I whisper, “Ignis,” and snap my fingers.
The torches spread throughout my space ignite all at once, making Rami jump and squeak adorably.
Rami snaps his head around to find me watching him intently.
My gaze runs down his exposed torso, free of any hair aside from a faint line of blonde hair from his navel into his breeches.
A crystal necklace is front and center on his chest, radiating power to ward off negativity and evil.
Whoever gave it to him must be powerful.
But it’s the little pink areolas on either side of the necklace that steal my attention and stand out in stark contrast on his slender chest. I bite my bottom lip painfully to draw the blood away from my plumping erection.
I would never debase Rami in such a way, but I can’t deny how magnificent this creature is.
“I-I hope you don’t mind that I did some work while I waited,” he mumbled, toeing the dirt with his boot. He scratches the back of his neck, looking bashful.
That yanks me out of my thoughts to really look around at my flowers, slowly moving around my space. There’s not a weed in sight. And over by the fire is a small bowl of seeds and another of grubs for Ludo. There’s also a bucket of water and one cup partially filled.
“You did all of this?” I question, realizing I stopped inches from him.
He nods as he scratches the back of his neck again. I’m realizing it’s an adorable nervous tick he does often. “Is that okay?”
With one more step, I barely leave a breath between us; needing to be as close as possible to him.
His pink tongue darts out, and I have to fight with every ounce of my hard earned self control not to dive in and taste him.
I stare down at him, our size difference finally clicking into place.
And I want to growl possessively to claim this man as mine.
But I can’t do that to him. I can’t trap this beautiful mortal to a life with no future.
And still, my eyes bounce between his mesmerizing blue gaze to his pouty pink lips.
Over and over. Mapping every line on his stunning face.
The faint sprinkling of freckles along his high cheekbones and nose are like the constellations of the cosmos.
His slightly rounded cheeks and squared chin are an odd mix of both masculine and boyish.
When his lips part on an exhale, his sweet breath ghosts against my skin, pebbling my flesh in its wake.
I can’t fight the magnetism and reach out to touch him.
He doesn’t flinch from me, and the incessant need to press him against me to map more than just the contours of his face nearly consumes me.
But I manage to fight it, just barely, and grasp onto one of the locks of his satiny hair that escaped his knot.
My fingers twirl the strand even though my gaze never leaves his.
“Thank you,” I croak out, redirecting the forbidden strand behind his ear; no longer trusting myself not to further our contact if I maintain my hold.
The minuscule distance between his skin and my fingers feels like an endless chasm.
Though I can imagine closing the distance, the feat is impossible, leaving me with a soul-crushing frustration.
Needing to put space between us, for both of our sakes, I carry Ludo to the bowls of snacks left out by Rami. He digs in greedily while I sit on a stump and lean my elbows on my knees. For the first time in centuries, I don’t know what to do.
I open and close my mouth multiple times, unsure what to say.
“I’m sorry,” I finally manage, peeking up at him as he sits in the wooden chair too far away from me.
He’s slipped the thin blouse back over his head, hiding his form from me.
Part of me wants to demand he remove it again, but I don’t have such claims on his body.
Not yet.
Not ever, I correct myself.
“For what?” he asks, taking a long drink from the cup of water.
My eyes track the movement of his Adam’s apple and the little dribble that trails down his chin.
I swallow thickly, thankful my thick breeches hide my burgeoning erection.
“For the last time we spoke,” I answer weakly.
“I wasn’t kind toward you, and yet you have returned with more kindness than I could ever imagine. ”
Foreign emotions claw up my chest, demanding their place. Ludo, sensing my distress, abandons his food and stands up so that his small forelegs are touching my arm. His strength flows through me, blending seamlessly with my powers and allowing me to control the tide of emotions.
Thanks, buddy, I think to him.
He dips his chin and returns to his bowl of seeds.
Rami shakes his head adamantly and copies my posture, leaning as close as he can toward me. “You weren’t unkind. I’m sorry I tried to push you into something you didn’t want to talk about.”
Now it’s my turn to shake my head. “You didn’t push,” I say softly.
We sit in silence, contemplating what was just expressed.
Neither of us were in the wrong, and yet we both misread the other.
I could blame this on being out of practice speaking with another, but I don’t feel like that’s entirely it.
That would require me to have had any semblance of communication skills originally.
A quiet chuckle bubbles from Rami, drawing my attention back to him.
“Miscommunication tropes are the worst,” he says, only confusing me further.
I can feel my brows pinch in tight which earns me another adorable giggle.
“In books. Tropes are what stories are about. Miscommunication is one of my least favorites. I always thought they were unrealistic.”
“Perhaps you judged these stories unfairly?” I tease.
Rami throws his head back with a boisterous laugh I’m compelled to match. The joviality of the moment settles over us, lowering both of our shoulders until the air around us is lighter than it’s ever been.
“Then maybe we should rectify this.” I stare deep into Rami’s gaze, curious where he’s planning to take this. “Since there’s no more work left to do tonight, how about we just spend the time getting to know each other?”
Part of me is screaming at how absurd the idea is, reminding me of all the reasons to walk away now.
He’s mortal.
It’ll break your heart when he leaves.
You can’t be touched.
The curse prevents you from speaking of it.
There’s nothing for you to offer him.
He’s too young and beautiful for your world.
You’re trapped.
“Okay,” I say instead, ignoring all the reasons to avoid him.
“Sweet,” Rami chirps. I open my mouth to ask him what he ate that was sweet, but he continues, unbeknownst to my confusion. “Do you want to just take turns pouring out our hearts, go back and forth with random things, or ask each other questions?”
I find myself even more confused as to why he’d want to remove our hearts. That sounds extreme. “What kind of questions?” I stick with instead, as I’m not a witch that uses sacrifices.
“I don’t know,” he shrugs, lifting one of his delicate shoulders. “Like what’s your favorite color?”
“Why does it matter what color I find most appealing?” That seems like a bizarre tidbit to discuss.
“It’s just one of those things people talk about, I guess. We don’t have to use that one. It was just an example.”
My lips quirk up into a half-smile, enjoying his rambling. “Blue,” I blurt out, making him meet my gaze. “Like that of a clear summer sky,” I add, my eyes never leaving his.
His chest rises and falls dramatically in response. “I’m finding myself more drawn to brown.”
“Oh?”
“Mmhmm. Especially when it has little flecks of gold sprinkled in it.”
“That’s the sign of my power,” I admit without prompting.
“Do all witches have gold in their eyes then?”
I shake my head, refusing to break the hold he has over me with his eyes. “It varies depending on our source of power. Sort of like auras.”
“You can see auras?”
I dip my chin, glancing at the wide array of colors around him. “Yours shows a great deal of pain and emotional tribulation, but at its core is one of the brightest vitality and strengths I’ve ever seen.”
Rami’s head droops forward, and I worry I’ve upset him with my assessment. “You’re not the first to believe I’m strong.” His voice is so weak, I doubt he believes either of us.
“Are they the person who gave you the necklace?”
His hand rests against his chest, where I imagine the necklace is located. My own chest knots, pleased he found someone else to remind him of his worth.
“Yup. She was a diviner.”
Fascinating. I never would have figured this town to have a diviner. And based on what Rami has told me, that still holds true. Instead of those prying questions, I am more curious about the man who is quickly owning all of my thoughts. “What cards did she pull?”
If he was surprised, the widening of his eyes was brief. I suppose he quickly realized I am a witch. “Let’s see, there was a Fool.”
“Was it reversed or right side up?”
“Reversed?” His voice rises like a question before he nods sharply, as if he answered his own question.
He closes his eyes as if he’s picturing it. He even moves his hands to imply the placement of the cards as he explains. Which honestly tells me more about the diviner than him—she is classically trained.
“Reversed Four of Wands, reversed Knight of Wands, Justice, Death, Hanged Man, reversed Eight of Swords, reversed King of Swords, Hermit, and The World.”
I close my eyes once he finishes and run through the list again, picturing my old deck of cards that did not survive the test of time. The few remaining pieces are locked away in my home as a reminder of everything I’ve lost.
Impulsive and reckless in his past. A flash of the scars along the inside of his wrists makes me wonder what he did. Likely placing him in his current predicament. Not sure that’s an appropriate get to know you conversation, though.
But there’s hope for him. He’ll find his peace once he accepts himself and finally realizes his strength. Further proof that I should be pushing him toward that future and not trapping him here with me.
“Beautiful,” I mumble, opening my eyes to find Rami watching me closely. “I told you that you were strong. No one who has had to fight through so much could be weak.”
A gorgeous blush pinkens his cheeks, and I’m fixated.
“Does the curse only allow you out at night?” His voice is soft, as if he’s unsure he’s allowed to speak of it.
Not that I can blame him, since I got so upset the last time. But I don’t trust my voice to give much of a response. I haven’t had much luck discussing the curse previously. So, I nod.
“Where do you go during the day?”
“I don’t really know,” I admit with a shrug. “I lie down to sleep when my body weakens, and then nothing. I’ve tried staying up later, but always awaken in my bedroll as the sun is setting. Honestly, I’m not even sure if it’s just my mind that fades or my body too.”
“Well, that explains why I can’t find you during the daylight hours. Your body must disappear too. Do you remember anything after you go to sleep?”
“No. Just darkness. Not even a dream. I believe it to be that my body fades to the aether so I’m neither living nor deceased, but in between.”
“What the fuck is powerful enough to pull off a curse like this on a witch?” His brows pinch in and his nostrils flare. It takes me a moment to realize that he is mad for me and not at me. My stomach roils at the foreign sensation.
“Right, right, right,” he says placatingly when I don’t answer him. “You can’t tell me.”
I dip my chin in appreciation of his understanding.
It’s not that I don’t want to fill him in on everything about it, but I can’t.
How he managed to put the curse on me still haunts my waking nightmares.
He should never have been exposed to such a power.
And now that I’m trapped here in the woods away from any resources, I will never free myself or this world of it.
But, then again, I never had someone like Rami to aid me before.