Chapter 6
6
Evening fell in Paris. I had walked around Montmartre for a couple of hours enjoying the cobbled streets, shops and artists in the square. I had then come back to the apartment, where I emailed Gita the paragraph I had written by The Wall of Love. It wasn’t anywhere near a synopsis or even a blurb, but it was a fragment. And after the past two months of being completely stuck, it was very welcome.
Gita seemed to think I was being quirky too.
Okay, I get it. You’re keeping me in suspense! But OMG the idea of a woman who no longer believes in love going to Paris and healing her heart has me VERY excited! I can’t wait to read it.
I was curled up on the sofa with my laptop, watching my favourite comfort show, when I read Gita’s reply. She had taken the fragment I’d sent her and come up with a story. And I had to admit, considering how stuck I had been, it wasn’t bad. What Gita didn’t know though was it wasn’t my character who no longer believed in love, but me. And how I was going to take someone on a journey to opening their heart again was anyone’s guess.
The apartment door swung open, making me jump. I closed the laptop, pausing the episode of Emily in Paris I had been watching as Ethan walked in, holding a large paper bag.
‘You’re here,’ he said, smiling. ‘I wasn’t sure if you’d still be out or not.’
‘I was exhausted after walking around most of the day,’ I said, sitting upright. My nose twitched. ‘What’s that?’ I gestured towards the bag he placed on the kitchen counter. Something smelled really good inside it.
‘I brought back some food from the restaurant for dinner; there’s enough for two. Come on.’
As Ethan pulled out plates and cutlery, I climbed off the sofa and wandered over, watching him for a moment. As he pulled out takeaway containers from the bag, I crossed my arms over my chest. ‘Why are you doing this?’
He looked at me. ‘Doing what?’
‘Being so nice to me.’
‘It’s not allowed?’ There was that amused look again. He took off the lids of the containers and my stomach rumbled. It looked really good.
Then it hit me. ‘You feel sorry for me.’
‘No,’ he replied, too quickly, as he started loading food onto two plates.
I snorted.
He shrugged. ‘Okay, yeah, I do feel bad about Joe, and what happened between the two of you, and then me invading your solo holiday and everything. I just want to try to make things up to you.’
‘Well, that’s sweet but it’s not really your job, is it? ’
‘I don’t see it as a job; I like being nice.’ Then he grimaced. ‘That was cringey, wasn’t it?’
I chuckled. ‘Yeah, kind of. But I appreciate it. You’re very thoughtful. Bringing this home,’ I said, gesturing to the food.
‘I like feeding people,’ he replied. ‘Take it over to the table, I’ll bring the wine.’
‘A girl could get used to this,’ I muttered as I took the plates over. We were having beef bourguignon and fancy mash and vegetables, plus there were side plates of salad, and bread that seemed freshly baked. Ethan joined me, pouring us both a glass of red wine.
‘This looks amazing,’ I said. ‘Did you help cook it?’
‘Yep. Tuck in,’ he said, nodding at me to start. ‘I was on sauce duty so you’ll have to tell me—’ He stopped abruptly as I moaned. Then he cleared his throat. ‘Um, good?’
‘It’s amazing. If this is what your food is like, I have to come to your restaurant as soon as we get back to London,’ I said, nodding furiously, then I felt my face heat up. ‘Um, only if you would be okay with that, obviously.’
‘Why wouldn’t I?’ he asked, surprised. I decided it was best not to answer that. Ethan’s phone rang then, saving me. ‘Finally. I thought he was never going to call me back.’ He swiped it up from the table to his ear. ‘Joe, at last.’
My whole body went rigid as I watched Ethan get up and walk into the living room. I stuffed some more of the delicious meal into my mouth to stop myself from screaming out insults. I couldn’t help but try to hear their conversation. Ethan paced back and forth as they spoke, at first quietly then his voice grew louder.
‘You told me you paid for this place,’ Ethan said. ‘You didn’t have the decency to check with Tessa whether it was okay for me to come here… Yeah, well, she surprised you then, didn’t she? I’m go ing to give her half the money… No, I won’t tell her that… I’m not sure whether to believe anything you’ve told me… To be honest, mate, I don’t really care… I’ve got to go.’
I jumped as Ethan hung up on Joe and quickly marched back towards me. I hastily took a gulp of my wine to push the food down as I thought I might have forgotten to chew properly while I shamelessly eavesdropped.
‘Joe said he forgot you had paid for this place and would never have expected you to come here alone. I think he was pretty taken aback to find out you did,’ Ethan said as he sat back down.
‘I bet,’ I said dryly. ‘Joe told me once that I didn’t seem capable of much. Maybe I let him think that, I don’t know. He was overwhelming sometimes. I think he made me feel that I needed to let him lead things. Maybe I didn’t feel like I could quite be myself.’
‘Hmm. You’re right. He can be overwhelming. He can try to… take over. We met a long time ago. At school. You grow up and become different people but his family were really good to me. When I didn’t have anyone else.’
There was a short silence. I wondered if this was Ethan trying to tell me that maybe they wouldn’t be friends if they met now. I didn’t know Ethan that well yet but he did appear to be a very different man to Joe.
‘What did Joe say that you didn’t want to pass on to me?’ I asked eventually.
Ethan seemed to weigh up whether to answer or not. Finally, he did. ‘He said he hopes you’re well.’
‘He hopes I’m well?’ I repeated. No apology. No regrets. No admitting he was wrong. ‘Why am I not surprised that was the message?’
There was another short silence. Then Ethan sighed. ‘I need to say something. Joe told me, and some of our friends, a few things that I now wonder whether they were completely correct,’ he said, slowly and carefully, as if trying to make sure he said the right thing. ‘So I can’t help but wonder if he did the same to you. About me.’
I leaned back in the chair. ‘Huh. Maybe you’re right.’ I thought about Joe saying Ethan hadn’t wanted to meet me. It seemed strange now that instead of avoiding me here like I had assumed he would, Ethan had taken me out to see a romantic location to help my book and now we were having dinner together. He seemed to really feel bad for what his mate had done to me.
Ethan continued. ‘Joe has been a big part of my life, he still is part of it, so I don’t want to sit here and slag him off, or get involved in what happened with you two, but I also don’t want us to not get along because of him.’
‘Me neither,’ I agreed. ‘So, what do we do? Act like we’re meeting here now for the first time?’ I joked.
‘Why not?’ Ethan replied seriously.
‘I suppose we could try it,’ I said. I was dying to know what Joe had said about me while we had been together, but I also knew that no good could come of asking. I was already furious with Joe and upset that I had given him my heart. Maybe it was better to just try to move on as best I could. And while I was with Ethan, put it to one side. We only had a short space of time together. After that, we’d go our separate ways. ‘Okay, let’s do that.’
Ethan smiled. ‘Good. I’d like that too. So, I’m Ethan.’ He held out his hand across the table.
I tittered but reached out and shook his hand. His skin was warm and his handshake firm. Our eyes met, and again, I felt an unfamiliar but very welcome ease settle over me. ‘Nice to meet you. I’m Tessa.’
‘Things you should know about me,’ Ethan said when we let go of each other’s hands. ‘I am a sous chef, I am passionate about food and wine, and I have quite possibly the largest collection of cookbooks in London. I find them soothing to flick through. I love Paris, walking around cities, I’m addicted to coffee, the stronger the better, and I always have it black…’ He grinned when I grimaced at that. ‘I am a talker, am honest, so don’t ask me something if you don’t want to know the answer, I love cooking for people and will make you food whenever you want, and I’m very forgetful so I need lists, reminders, messages to remind me of everything, and I hate it when people are late. Or are rude to serving staff. That’s a real bugbear.’
I nodded. ‘With you on that one. Okay, I am an author, I love writing and books, and I also am addicted to Netflix and love to binge a series in a day. I hate coffee but have to have at least five cups of tea a day. I love hoodies, graphic tees, jeans and trainers and I hate wearing anything fancy. I am an overthinker, my brain is always on overdrive, I have a sarcastic sense of humour but it’s never mean, I am an introvert and have to be pushed to leave my house because being cosy is everything, and I love playing board games.’ I didn’t add that was something Joe had been unimpressed by. ‘I hate being lied to. Oh, and exercise. I really hate that too.’
‘Anything other than walking around the city, it should be banned,’ Ethan agreed. He smiled at me. ‘I’m glad I know you better now.’
‘Me too. Do you have your course tomorrow?’ I asked, finally looking away from him because those blue eyes of his were kind of hypnotic .
‘Yes, but not until the afternoon. We’re making pastries so I might have some to bring home.’
‘I’m happy to be your guinea pig,’ I said, wondering why Ethan saying the word ‘home’ hadn’t felt as strange as it should have. ‘So, Paris tour guide, where should I go tomorrow for more inspiration?’
He propped a hand under his chin. ‘I mean, it’s meant to be raining so being inside sounds good. You’re an author, you love books, where better than a bookshop in Paris? I know a really good café nearby for a hot drink afterwards.’
I looked at him in surprise. ‘You want to come?’
‘Can’t have you lost on the streets of Paris in the rain.’
‘I don’t know, sounds kind of romantic.’
Ethan smiled. ‘Spoken like someone who writes love stories.’
‘Let’s hope I still can.’
Ethan’s phone beeped with a message. He picked it up. ‘Oh, Juliette and Oscar are on their way back,’ he said. He met my gaze. ‘My friends who’ve been away in the country. They’re coming back to the city tomorrow. So you might not have to put up with me for much longer.’
‘Oh, right.’ Suddenly, I wasn’t quite so desperate for him to stay somewhere else. I was starting to get used to sharing this apartment with him. ‘Great.’
‘Great,’ he echoed, but his eyes met mine and I wondered if he might have been getting used to being here with me too.