Chapter 19
Nineteen
Morgan
I hate that I get no peace at all here. Someone bursts through the apartment door. I sit up in bed and fold my arms. Mum is already walking into my room. Paw Patrol blares and Cora chuckles in the lounge, just outside my door where I could keep an eye on her.
‘Morgan, I’m sorry for going off at you like that. Dad explained what happened and I get it. You were sticking up for Harry. Only earlier today, Quinn was telling me that she was worried about him being bullied at school, but I can’t have things getting physical.’
‘That boy, James, he had me trapped, Mum. They blamed us for those letters and they were pushing me around. I was scared and I needed to get away from them. He then fell badly over a chair but he was bullying me. I wasn’t bullying him like Mr Blakely seemed to think.’
She nudges my door open wide so she can keep an eye on Cora, who we can both see is rocking in her tiny chair and clapping at something on the TV. Mum is already sitting on my bed. I can barely hear myself think because Cora’s TV programmes are always so loud and chaotic.
‘Come here, Squidge.’
Mum hugs me and it feels like it did before Cora was born, when she actually had time for me.
Anxiety bubbles away inside, burning in my stomach and teasing my senses in every way that is bad.
Mum’s hug is helping so I hug her back. She lets out a hiccup.
She did these loud occasional hiccups when she was pregnant.
Now I’m convinced. Between that, the hideous marmalade and my parents’ whisperings, it’s time to confront her.
‘Mum, are you pregnant?’
She pulls away with a startled look and nods slowly. ‘Yes.’
My shoulders drop. Cora is a lot for all of us, especially me.
‘But it’s okay. We’ve found a nursery for Cora.
I know you’ve helped a lot with her and you’re a kid too, and I’m sorry about that but your dad and I, we’re really happy about the baby.
’ She takes my hand and places it on her stomach.
‘It’s early days yet, so we’re not telling anyone, okay?
It’s a family secret. Talk of the baby stays in the apartment. ’
I force a smile. I know I’ll love my baby brother or sister when they’re born.
Hell, I love Cora even though she’s a shrieking whinge bag most of the time.
I’m glad they’ve sorted a nursery out. That makes me happy.
I think back to what I should say to Mum about Tessa, James and what happened to Harry.
I want to mention the missing girl again but I don’t feel I should, and I don’t want to slip up and tell Mum I was in the woods with Harry. ‘Mum, I found some things out today.’
‘Okay, do you want to share them with me?’
She says this like it’s optional but I can see she’s dying for me to spill all. ‘James, the bully kid – Tessa, the woman with the scars – she’s his aunt. He doesn’t live too far away and he stays with her a lot. Also, Harry told me that James put worms in his boots once.’
Mum recoils and starts biting the insides of her cheeks.
I can see her cogs whirring as she comes to the same conclusion as me.
James is a bully, it’s likely that he sent the malicious letters to everyone and put the worms in the hamper that his aunt probably told him to give to us.
I wouldn’t blame Mum for thinking that. It’s exactly what I’m thinking. ‘There’s something else.’
‘What?’
‘I gave James a little shove in the playground because he called Harry a horrible name and Harry got angry at me. He said he didn’t need me to stick up for him and that it was embarrassing.
When he saw James on the floor in the dinner hall, he thought I’d done the same again.
He looked really upset with me. I don’t think he’s going to talk to me again.
I’ve lost the only friend I’ve made around here. ’
‘I’m sure when you explain things as they were, Harry will understand.’
It’s not like I’m not going to try. I’ll head to his later to see how he is, that’s if he’ll see me.
‘And as for James, I did push him hard, Mum. I wanted to get away from him and when he hit the floor, I was glad he was hurt because it was the only way I could get away from him and his friends. I wanted him to feel pain and now I feel horrible about it.’
Mum is shaking. I pull away. I knew she wouldn’t understand.
‘Did you, err, did you find a letter downstairs at all?’
I raise my brows and shake my head. ‘I didn’t see any letter. I came straight up with Cora.’
She scrunches her brows. ‘I love you so much, you know that. You’re my first born and you’ll always be the one who made me a mum.’ She leans in and kisses me on the head. ‘I have some good news.’
‘What?’
‘We’ll have Wi-Fi on Wednesday so you’ll be able to chat with Mai as much as you like.’
Yes, I want to punch the air. ‘Thanks, Mum. I’ll apologise to James tomorrow and make things good with the teachers.’
‘Thank you. We have to do what we can to get by and fit in while we’re here.’
‘But I don’t regret pushing him.’
Mum stands and looks at me like I’m a stranger, then she leaves me on my own. That look has left me feeling unsettled. Either she thinks I’m lying or she thinks I’m some sort of psycho. I don’t yet know which but I’m sure I’ll find out.