Chapter 22
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Nate
“How can you think and hit at the same time?”
Yogi Berra
Amanda was fine.
That was the first thing I told myself as I stepped out of the rideshare, duffel slung over one shoulder, keys to my truck finally back in my pocket.
Her OB had run every precautionary test and cleared her to rest at home.
No labor scares. No red flags. Just a firm warning: rest, no stress, and don’t get cute about it.
Cassidy had stayed with her two nights, sleeping on the same couch I always used, and by the second morning, Amanda texted me a photo of the two of them playing Uno and accused me of being officially replaced.
It was a bit of a shock to learn that Amanda was working part-time for Cassidy via text, but it didn’t shock me. If anything, it made me smile. Unless, Cassidy told her the truth about us?
Ugh. What fucking truth.
A part of me loved the idea of them being friends. Amanda needed more people in her life, and honestly, so did Cassidy. But the other part of me wanted to hit pause. What if this shit blew up? What if Cassidy and I … what? Don’t … remain friends?
You’re not friends.
Yeah, the thought of seeing her with someone else made me feel murdery so friends possibly wasn’t the right answer. I had no idea what we were. The distance didn’t clear anything up besides the fact I missed Cassidy, wanted to see her, touch her, and kiss her.
The road trip was mediocre. We went five hundred.
I pitched one clean game and one that unraveled in the sixth.
My ERA didn’t budge much, but it wasn’t about that.
Not really. It was about how nothing felt quite right.
The clubhouse noise grated. The hotel beds felt too empty.
I hated how fast I got used to her being around, whether it was her teasing or old man comments, or soft smiles.
We had an interview tomorrow morning, but I didn’t want to see her first with cameras in our faces and half-truths on our tongues.
So I went to her.
It was almost eleven at night. She’d be asleep but I had to take a shot.
The city was still humid from the late rain, and the air felt heavy with everything I hadn’t said yet.
I stood at her door with a small brown paper bag in one hand and my heart in the other.
Inside the bag: a bag of dill pickle-flavored popcorn, a goofy deck of cards from a shop in Kansas with cartoon baseball mascots on them, and the softest Yogi Berra T-shirt I could find in a beat-up sports shop on the corner of East 9th.
Grabbing my phone, I called her not to startle her.
“Hello?” she answered, her voice all sleepy and groggy. “Everything okay?”
“I’m outside your door. Can I come in?” Fuck, nerves danced along my spine as I clenched my fingers. She could say no, or ask what the hell I was doing.
“What?” Her voice was almost a whisper. “You’re here? Why?”
“I had to see you. Please, let me in.”
My heart pounded as she hung up and a few seconds later, the handle twisted and there she was.
Sleepy and barefoot, wearing my damn hoodie again.
Her hair was in two braids, loose and uneven, framing her face in a way that had my fingers twitch to touch her.
I almost convinced myself I’d built her up in my mind, but the reality was event better.
She was so fucking beautiful, it was unreal.
She wore no make up, had sleep lines over her face, and she legit stole my breath.
“Hi,” she said, smiling as she stepped aside to let me in.
Her voice was still thick with sleep, but her eyes were clearing fast, growing wider with each blink.
She shifted her weight from left to right, her bare legs catching the soft light from the hallway.
The hoodie hung off one shoulder like it belonged to her more than it ever had to me.
A blush bloomed across her cheeks as she glanced down at herself, tucking her hands into the sleeves. “I’m still in my jammies. Sorry.”
“Do not apologize.”
I set the bag down with a soft thud, but my focus was only on her.
I reached out and tugged lightly at the hem of the hoodie, just enough to pull her toward me.
Her body hit mine with a quiet, satisfying thump—soft everywhere she touched, warm against the cold I hadn’t even realized I’d brought back with me from the road.
“I missed you,” I said, the words barely above a breath.
Then I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her in fully. Her face pressed to my chest, her breath catching as she let herself sink into it. And fuck, everything in me stilled.
The chaos I’d been carrying, the road noise, the hotel beds, the relentless churn of games and cameras and fake smiles, all of it quieted the second I felt her heartbeat against mine. It was steady. Unhurried. Like she wasn’t shocked to be held by me, like she belonged there. Like I did too.
I buried my nose in her hair and breathed her in. Sleep and citrus shampoo and something warm that was just her. I didn’t want to let go.
She let out a tiny sigh, almost like she didn’t mean for it to escape. Her fingers curled into the front of my shirt as she squeezed me back. “I missed you too,” she mumbled against my chest. “Can’t believe you’re here.”
“I’m so fucking tired. I just want to sleep with you.” I kissed the top of her head, needing to be closer to her. “Can I sleep with you, Cass? I can give you presents tomorrow.”
I almost didn’t ask. I didn’t want to make it weird. But I needed to be near her. Just to sleep. Just to breathe her in.
“Presents?” She tilted her head up, eyes wide and lips curved. “You brought me presents?”
Fuck, she was so pretty looking at me like that, like I made her happy.
I nodded, and fought the urge to kiss her pretty lips.
I didn’t come for that, but damn, she looked so good.
I tilted her chin up, taking in every part of her features.
Her button nose, the way her lashes fanned over her cheeks when she blinked.
The few tiny freckles on her face and the blue of her eyes.
I pressed a quick kiss on her lips, just a taste, before grinning. “I did, but you get them tomorrow.”
“Okay, I can wait but only because you look so tired.” She frowned and traced her finger over my face. “Come on, old guy, let’s sleep.”
I followed her into her bedroom, quickly tossed my shirt off on the floor and slid off my shoes.
I kept my joggers as a precaution, and soon enough, I was in her bed with her body curled against mine.
She sighed as I kissed her neck, and adjusted our position so her back was completely pressed up against my chest. “Hey Cass?”
“Hm?” she replied, almost asleep already.
“I like coming back to you.”
“Me too, Nate. I like you coming back to me.”
The sun hadn’t fully broken through the blinds when I woke.
Her bedroom was quiet, the air still and warm, filled with that soft hush you only get in the early morning before the world starts moving.
Cassidy was still asleep, curled on her side, one hand tucked under her cheek, breathing slow and even.
My hoodie was wrapped around her like armor, her legs tangled in the sheets.
I watched her for a few long minutes, enjoying myself in the simple, selfish joy of just being near her.
The road trip ensured two things for me.
One, I was into Cassidy Calloway and two, I wanted to do something about it.
She stirred before I moved. One slow blink, then another.
Her lips parted in a soft yawn and her hand reached across the bed, blindly smacking my chest before curling into my shirt like she didn’t want me to go anywhere.
“You’re staring,” she mumbled, voice thick with sleep. “It’s creepy, yet again, old man.”
“Still with the old man stuff?” I leaned down and kissed the corner of her mouth, just to feel it. Just to steal another second of being close to her. “You really want me to retaliate?”
She smiled without opening her eyes. “Depends. Does it involve breakfast? Or more of your mouth?”
“You hungry?” I asked, running my fingers gently through her braid. She made a little noise that sounded like yes and no at the same time. I kissed her temple. “I can make you something. Or we can lie here a little longer. You pick.”
Her eyes cracked open, one brow arching. “Are you saying I’m in charge?”
I shrugged and slid my hand under the edge of the hoodie, palm settling against her waist. “Only until I kiss you again. Then I’m definitely taking control.”
She giggled and rolled onto her back, the blanket shifting. “Bold of you to assume you’re the one in charge in the bedroom, O’Brien.”
I propped myself up on one elbow, brushing her hair back from her cheek. “Cass baby, when I get you naked, you’ll listen to me. Trust me on that.”
I kissed her nose, then her jaw. I couldn’t stop touching her, couldn’t stop wanting more.
Her warmth was addictive. I traced her side, up and down, careful and slow.
Every part of me wanted to get lost in her, with her, but we had to talk first. It would be too selfish of me to keep going without being on the same page.
That was one thing I knew for damn sure. If we were gonna do this between us, we both had to be all in.
“Okay, that was hot, not gonna lie.” She blushed and her tongue wet her bottom lip as she stared at my mouth. “So is this us talking or what? I wasn’t sure what I expected when you got back, but it certainly wasn’t this.”
I scrubbed a hand over my face, sighing because she was right. I hesitated, contemplating pushing off the talk. I was terrified of what she’d say but damn. I had no choice. “What if I made you breakfast while we talked?”
“Do we have time for that?” She turned toward her side table, breaking the contact between us and I instantly wanted her back.
I missed her warmth and how good she felt. Seriously, what the fuck was wrong with me?
“Okay, here is the email from Lauren.” She leaned back into me, holding her phone up so we could read it.