Chapter 69
CHAPTER 69
CALEB
I walk into Mount Crystals to find my sisters already at the table. I shouldn’t be surprised. Despite their age gap, these two are getting closer.
“There he is,” Kat says, getting up and dropping a kiss on my cheek.
Harper does the same.
“No, April?” Harper says, sounding disappointed. She seems to have hit it off with April. I see her name popping up on April’s phone all the time.
“No, she’s got a choreography job in Manchester. Working on a pop video for some rockstar,” I say, almost spitting out the final words. Lucas is April’s age and gorgeous, with a string of women following him around.
I watch my sister’s try to smother their grins, but they fail miserably.
“Don’t laugh at me,” I say. “I came here for advice. If you’re just going to take the piss, then I’ll leave.”
They both squirm before sitting more upright in their chairs, shooting each other a look.
How did I think this was going to be a good idea ?
I need a woman’s perspective otherwise I’d be talking to Gabe.
“What kind of advice?” Kat asks.
“April told me she loves me,” I say, quickly.
Harper squeals and claps her hands, while Kat sits and stares at me.
“What’s the problem?” Kat asks.
I run a hand through my hair before placing both hands on the table. “She was falling asleep when she said it and she hasn’t said a word since.”
My heart rate had picked up at her words, but then there had been silence followed by her gentle snore. When we woke up the next morning, I made love to her, but nothing. It was like I imagined those three little words.
Both women's faces take on an identical expression, furrows appearing between their brows. Only Kat has dark hair, while Harper is still in her purple phase.
“Have you asked her?” Harper says, clearly confused.
“No. I want her to tell me of her own free will. What if I misheard her? I could scare her off. She’s got a lot going on. She’s about to head off to choreograph for bloody Lucas Sommerfield’s music video - the rockstar stud! I don’t need her to think I’m some possessive and jealous jerk.”
I run a hand over my face before sighing and my sister’s chuckle.
“I don’t think you have anything to worry about where Lucas is concerned,” Kat says, laughing into her drink. “I’m not sure he’s April’s type.”
“Not helping,” I huff, unsure who this new Kat is. “Look, I’m trying to be patient. She’s moved into her own apartment. I stay over, take her to dinner. With everything going on with her birth mother. Now her grandmother wants to meet her. The grand opening of the studio, her choreography.” I pinch the bridge of my nose and tail off, knowing I’m being selfish.
“You don’t want to add to the pressure you feel she’s already under?” Kat asks.
I nod.
“But Caleb, what about your needs?” she asks softly.
I look at my sister, shocked.
This isn’t about me.
“Relationships are two ways. They’re not all give. You have to receive something, too. If not?—”
Kat doesn’t finish her sentence. She’s got the wrong end of the stick.
“I do,” I say, not wanting to put any negative thoughts towards April.
“Does April make you happy?” Harper asks.
“More than anyone I’ve ever dated before,” I tell them honestly. “I can’t imagine life without her.”
“Then you need to tell her that,” Harper says.
I sigh. “I’ve told her I love her,” I tell them both, causing their eyebrows to raise and a smile to appear on both their lips.
“What did April say when you told her?” Kat asks.
“April’s past makes it difficult for her to trust. People she loved have let her down. First her birth mother, then her foster parents. I think she wants to believe me, I get that.” I tell them honestly.
“And you, dear brother, until April, have been a commitment phobe,” Harper says.
I tilt my head at my sister. “Thanks, sis.”
But she’s right. I never believed I could find love until now.
“You’re welcome,” she says with a grin.
I take a sip of the wine the waiter has poured, staring at the liquid .
“How can I make her believe I’m not going to simply walk away when and if the going gets tough? Let her know my playboy days are over. She’s the only woman I want. Will ever want.”
I look across the table at my older sister.
“Are we doomed?” My heart rate picks up at the thought of losing April.
Kat smiles and shakes her head. “No. Don’t be so dramatic! April has spent much of her life emotionally alone. She moved families, grew to trust and feel safe, then she moved again. All you can do, is what you’re doing now. Be there for her. Make her laugh. Support her. Love her… be your annoyingly cheerful self. Show her, she’s no longer alone, that you have her back. That we all do. But also remember April isn’t used to our world,” She pauses and leans forward, resting her hand on my arm. “Caleb, you’re my brother, and I love you dearly, but that playboy image of yours was always going to bite you in the ass one day. You need to be patient, give her time. There’s no rush. She’s not going anywhere. If April comes to you, your relationship will be cemented. If you force it, she may always have doubts. But also remember, if you come out to the world, you’ll be thrusting her and her past into the limelight. You chose to put yourself in the spotlight, April hasn’t. She needs to know you’ll have her back whatever happens. This is a big deal for her.”
Shit, she’s right.
I run a hand down my face, knowing my sister speaks the truth, never one to beat around the bush.
I’ve invited the press in for years. What until now has worked in my favour, could very well be what destroys my future. My father warned me years ago, when I first opened that door, I’d never be able to shut it again. The press will take the good, the bad and the ugly if you let them. I just pray I can protect April from it.
I lean forward, resting my elbows on the table, cradling my head.
Harper huffs, making me look up. “April isn’t a wounded bird in need of rescuing. She’s a grown ass woman, who has spent her entire life rescuing herself. She’s independent and strong. A survivor. You’ve said so yourself. April loves you. Anyone with eyes in their head can see that. But you, my dear brother, hold all the cards.”
I stare at my little sister, my mouth slightly agape.
“What Harper is trying to say, I think,” Kat pipes in. “Is, maybe April doesn’t want to mistake love for being indebted to you.”
I look between my sisters.
Are they right? Have I swept in?
I’ve done it from a place of love. I’d do anything for her. Isn’t that what you do when you love someone?
“If you want to show her you love her, just be there for her. Show her you’ve changed. April has been let down all her life, she needs to see you are dependable, you trust her judgement and her feelings. Let her realise she loves you and can’t live without you.”
My heart stutters in my chest.
What if I have to let her go?
No, that’s not an option. I love her. I know she loves me. She shows me every time she lets me into her body, when she laughs at my terrible jokes, when she snuggles into my side. We’re connected.
When I think of her leaving, my heart clenches, and pain, unlike anything I’ve felt before rips through my chest.
“Think about it,” Kat says, squeezing my hand. “Talk to her. But be prepared. You may need to let her go so she can find her way back to you.”