chapter twenty-two #2
He leaned against the entryway, supposedly having been there for several minutes.
His attire seemed relaxed, a few buttons undone on his shirt as well as his sleeves rolled up his forearms. Pushing off the wall, he approached the other end of the bookshelf, trailing a finger over a couple spines before plucking one book from its place.
He began to walk toward me, examining the first few pages to make sure it was the book he was thinking of, then held it out to me. “I think you’d enjoy this one.”
I threw him a suspicious stare before I took the book from his hand.
“ Fear and Trembling ,” I read the title. “Is this a joke?”
“It is philosophy, so sometimes.” He smirked. “You seem like an existentialist to me.”
I peeled the book open, the pages fluttering as I flicked through. If this was some sort of cruel humor, I would not know. I snapped it shut and clocked the new decor on the floor before his desk.
“New rug?” I raised a brow.
“Yes.” He grimaced, moving past me to his decanter. “I would offer you a drink, but I haven’t finished your homemade concoction yet.”
“Why didn’t you dispose of it?”
He lifted a shoulder and poured himself a glass. “It has a nice tang to it. Bites back a little.” He took a sip as he moved to his desk, sitting on the front of it as if to wait for what I really came for. Though his expression held some reservation. “You wore red,” he commented.
He was right. A red pomegranate salve painted my lips. I had to keep myself from biting my lip. “Not for you.”
“Then who?” There was a slight smugness to his tone.
“Myself,” I said.
“If that is what you think, so be it.” He shrugged. “Now, I am more interested in a certain proposal you mentioned earlier.”
“Don’t worry, it’s a modest one.” I reluctantly peeled myself away from the bookshelf and toward the middle of the room.
“I think I would need to hear it before agreeing to such a statement.” He sipped the poison from his cup, those striking pale eyes stalking me over the rim of the glass.
I pressed my thumb into my other palm, fidgeting. Why was it so embarrassing to ask?
“You said you ‘can’t do this,’” I started. “In the cemetery.”
“Did I?”
“Yes, it was the last thing you said to me that night.”
“If you say so.” He stared. “What of it?”
“You were going to eat me.”
“I never said that.”
“By the sight of your teeth twitching, I beg to differ.” I stepped closer. “I’m not angry with you, not entirely. I assumed that it was something you couldn’t help.”
“Are you calling me an animal, Miss Lis?”
“I have worse names for you—but nevertheless,” I continued, stopping in front of him, our eyes level with one another. “I’m prepared to offer you a deal.”
A softer rendition of his predatory clicks emanated from him, but it sounded muffled, like he was trying to hide the fact that I had piqued his interest—or his appetite.
“I want to trade,” I said firmly. “Your blood for mine.”
“You want… my blood?”
“Yes, I want to study you,” I said plainly.
“Why would I let you do that?”
“Because you’re hungry. You’re not eating.”
His brows furrowed, and he sat up straighter. “Nonsense.”
“I had spent many nights wondering why you would be so wasteful. I assumed that you were feeding well with the number of bodies you were leaving around until you interrupted my visit to my father. Then I saw how truly exhausted you were. You were trembling . Every part of you wanted to do it, but you didn’t.
” I paused for a moment, thinking carefully about my next words.
“Then, you said you couldn’t do it. It had me wondering, why don’t you just kill me?
Why do you act like you need permission? ”
“I don’t.”
“Then why?”
“Tension spoils the blood.”
“Liar.” I poked my finger into his chest. “Tension doesn’t spoil the blood. You want to taste it paired with pleasure .”
He averted his eyes, refusing to answer like the stubborn child he was.
“Please feel free to contest if it isn’t true. Unless it is due to a change of morals, Creature ? What happened to wanting to kill me and ravage me for your own uses? Have you grown a heart as fast as you healed the wounds I have left on your body?”
He was unwilling to look at me.
“Answer me, you vile thing!” I shoved his chest with both my hands. “Why did you stop?” I shouted.
He snatched my wrists, yanking me forward, our noses nearly touching. Every tense muscle, every tic in his jaw, every stern expression concealed words left unsaid—I wanted to poke and prod at every single one of them.
“Why haven’t you killed me yet?” I asked shakily. “Why did you hesitate?”
“You ask as if you were hoping I would.” His eyes narrowed dangerously, and I could feel a vibration against his chest. He was holding back so much—I feared he would combust. “Like you would not mind dying if it meant your assumptions would be correct.”
My chest rose and fell quickly despite my attempts to appear calm. It was becoming harder knowing our proximity—the danger of being within biting distance of a thing that could not help himself any more than the next savage animal.
“You want to know why I haven’t killed you yet?
My mouth runs dry when I think of killing you.
I didn’t understand it. It frustrated me for a long time.
I would usually be skipping heartbeats at the thought of ripping through something as divine as you.
” The darkness in his eyes had disappeared when he looked back at me.
It was replaced by pain. “It would not be the same. I wanted to hear you dedicate your cruel words only to me. I didn’t care if you were yelling at me, screaming at me, telling me no…
as long as it was for me. Soon, I didn’t want you to leave.
When I was away, you danced around my mind like a man’s deepest regret, ferocious and intoxicating.
You want to know what I want? I want you , Alina.
All of you. Every hair on your head, every tear, laugh, and scream that rips from your delicate vocal cords will all become mine . ”
This was one of those times when I forgot whatever clever thing I had to say next. The simmering anger inside me mingled with a knot I did not want to acknowledge.
“You are a cruel, wicked thing, Silas Forbes,” I bit out.
“There. That’s it.” His hand shot up and gripped my jaw, squeezing. “I want to taste every venomous word performed by your lips until you have to invent new ones just for me.”
“You are just hungry.” I gulped. “You think you want me, but you want to feed. I have no qualms with that. Just don’t pretend it’s anything more.” I pried myself from his grip, backing away. “Take my deal, or leave it. That is the only way you will continue to see me.”
“How often?”
“Excuse me?”
“How often do I get to see you? Under this proposed deal, of course.” He stood from the desk.
I retreated farther. “Once a week.”
“Seven days a week.” He advanced.
“Twice a week.” Another step back.
“Four.”
“Three. I can’t bear to see you more than that.” My back hit the wall.
“I can work with three.” He rested a hand on the wall beside my head as he leaned down. “How often will you make an offering to me?”
“You get blood when you give blood. In my lab.”
He stared up as if to consider it, sighing when he finished weighing his options. “Where do I sign?”
I swallowed the lump forming in my throat, glancing away.
“You trust me enough to settle this over a handshake?” He raised his brow. “You’re a poor businesswoman.”
“I’d rather there be no paper trail detailing our odd exchange,” I muttered under my breath.
“Since you think me a devil, how about we seal it accordingly?” He grinned, leaning closer than before. If I flinched, our lips might touch.
“No.”
“Allow me at least one simple pleasure,” he groaned.
He grabbed my face again, making me flinch as he pulled it toward him. He finally closed the space between us and captured my lips with his own.
While Silas was possessive and bold, his kiss was soft, and the lingering scent of smoke and blackberries added that extra edge that sent me somewhere else far away. He was just as intoxicating as the lingering taste of bourbon.
When I opened my mouth to breathe, he took the opportunity to deepen our kiss, gently running his tongue over my bottom lip, begging for entry.
He cupped my cheek to pull me into him, the other hand snaking around my waist as if afraid I would slip away, as was often the case.
A soft moan escaped me. The sound only encouraged him, as he undid my coat and let it slip off my shoulders. He tugged open the buttons down the front of my blouse, exposing my neck.
“The pomade was a nice touch. You should consider being more subtle next time.” He took my bottom lip in his mouth and sucked on it.
That devilish tongue wiped the red tinge off his lips, peering off in the distance as he tried deciphering the taste.
“Cyanide? Really?” He tsked as if I should know better.
“You have to at least admire my persistence.” I shrugged.
“You are a woman of many admirable qualities,” he whispered, kissing me again, sucking and biting at my lips as if he wanted to taste more. “It’s a nice flavor on you. I want more.” His tongue glided down across my jawline, the movements of his lips against my neck becoming greedy.
“I want to hear you beg for me,” I breathed. “On your knees, preferably.”
“Why would I beg when I could just make you melt with a single tongue-lashing between your legs?”
I pulled a small blade from the hem of my sleeve.
He eyed me cautiously.
I scored it across my palm, letting the blood trickle from the fine lines on my hand. “Consider this an advance.”
His knees practically buckled, his chest pressed against my lower abdomen, and his eyes held an unwavering focus on my hand. When he reached for my hand, I slapped it away.
“Uh-uh! How do we ask for favors?” I was almost satisfied with the image before me. Blood trailed down from my hand to my elbow and dripped onto the floor as I held it out of reach.
His jaw twitched with every precious drop wasted.
“Beg,” I repeated.
His glare burned hot as he held my gaze.
It was amusing to see it all unfold. If only I had known that I could have done this sooner, maybe I would have had more fun with him by now. Taming beasts was easy if you dangled their reward just out of reach.
“If you’re going to compare your nasty impulses to the likes of dogs,” I purred, “then you better bark.”
To my surprise, his hands slid up my legs under my skirt, and he nipped tenderly at the skin of my abdomen.
He rested his chin on my sternum as he looked up.
“ Please. ” His words rolled off his tongue like honey, a toxic edge to his voice.
The malice was building inside of him. I could feel it in sparks as I rubbed against his nerves like two pieces of flint.
What a sight to behold!
I lowered my bloodied hand over him, just above his face so he could see the droplets pooling on my palm before they threatened to fall.
He leaned up and dragged his long tongue across it.
I had not realized how long it was, which explained many sensations from previous encounters. The pain of the cut faded and tingled at the touch of his tongue, like there was some sort of numbing agent within his saliva.
His eyes turned black until only a crescent of silver blue peered up at me.
My working theory was that these creatures’ bodies sent blood to their eyes when they were aroused by prey or other stimuli to aid their sight while hunting.
Butterflies formed in my stomach thinking about every time it had happened when he laid his hands on me.
He cupped my hand with his own, holding it closer as if it were going to be taken away before he finished savoring it.
He sucked on the wound greedily until that tingling reaction numbed my entire hand.
When he pulled his bloodstained mouth away, I could see that his fangs were barred, unable to help themselves from reaching forward.
“Restraint looks good on you,” I said. His eyes flicked up at me in annoyance.
My bloodied hand swiped across my chest, the warmth dripping down between my breasts.
Silas lifted me by my hips as he stood, pinning me up against the wall. He dragged his tongue across my chest, teasing a nipple with his tongue as he cleaned away any trace of red.
A satisfied hum bloomed in my throat as I wrapped my arms around his neck. “See what happens when you say please?” I taunted, tugging his hair to make him look at me.
“Let me feed from you,” he whispered.
“You just did?—”
“No, I want to try here,” he said against the crook of my neck, leaving a soft bite on my skin.
“You haven’t earned that yet.”
“How cruel.” He let out an exasperated sigh as if to contemplate if it was worth edging himself on like this.
Our breathing began to synchronize as our bodies pressed tightly against one another. It was undeniable that we had been avoiding the tension that bloomed between us. It was intoxicating enough that we both needed a moment to collect our bearings.
I spoke after a long moment. “Why do we do this, Silas?”
“Why do we do anything?” he said against my neck, gripping me tightly as he rested his forehead against it.
Seeing any tenderness from a thing like him was strange, especially for something like me.