19. Roman
ROMAN
The past couple of days have dragged since I had the talk with Malachi.
It’s already midweek, and I haven’t had a chance to speak with him again.
The way he’d dismissed me has made me angry, and while I want to put things straight between us, I haven’t wanted a confrontation.
I guess he’s feeling the same way, as he seems to be avoiding me.
Doesn’t he see I’m trying to help us all?
I’m the one who takes the time to try to decipher what the universe wants from us. When he said I wasn’t the leader of us all, it wasn’t true. I am, in many ways.
I started this, after all. I was doing this before I met the other two. They joined me in the world I’ve made, and now what? They are going to turn on me, over a girl. One Cain hasn’t seen for years, and Malachi just set eyes on and went stupid over.
My room is suffocating me this morning, a zoo cage today, rather than my safe space.
I glance at the time on my phone. It’s mid-morning, so classes will be in full flow.
It means the hallways and walkways of the college should be empty.
I decide to go out and get some fresh air. Try to clear my bad mood.
A walk in nature will do me good and perhaps show me a way of communicating my discomfort to Cain. Now that Malachi has failed to see what I’m trying to show him, Cain is my last chance to talk some sense into my fellow Preachers.
Will he be receptive to my message or will he be angry with me the way Mal was?
I grab a sweater and throw it on over my gray t-shirt.
I push my feet into my old, worn sneakers and grab my phone and the key for the water tower and head for the door.
I might go to our tower after a walk in the woods.
Perhaps it is time to use some magic, to get help from the world through the veil.
Advice on how to ignore my newfound lust, for example, or to ask for help dealing with my friends.
I have locks of their hair, taken from them when they were drunk one night.
It’s an insurance policy in case I ever need help dealing with them, and that time might have come.
Sighing, I open my door and peer out into the empty hallway.
I don’t want to bump into anyone right now.
The mood I’m in stinks, and people get on my last nerve at the best of times.
I pat my front pocket and feel the reassuring outline of my folded knife.
You never know when violence might descend here at Verona Falls.
Some days it strikes me that it’s more like an insane asylum than a college.
Things happen here that would get other places closed down.
I take the side door to the outside, so I can avoid anyone hanging around the front of the college, and jog past the parked cars, before veering left into the woods. Once I’m among the trees, I find myself relaxing. Birds are singing, and there’s a fresh breeze.
I breathe deeply and stroll through the woods, stopping to admire a huge mushroom growing out of a dead tree.
I cross over the stream that cuts through this part of the woods and stroll into the clearing a few feet ahead. The sun is shining, and I smile as I look up at the clear, deep blue sky. When I glance back to the earth again, I frown. Oh, hell, no .
Sitting in the clearing, by the opposite tree line, with a sketchpad on his lap and looking right at me, is Saint. I detest this guy and have no desire to talk with him.
He gives me a big smile, suspiciously big. I don’t trust Saint as far as I can throw him, and his smile puts me on edge.
I turn to go, but his voice stops me.
“I’m surprised to see you taking a nice stroll as if you don’t have a care in the world after what went down in the bar the other night.”
His words have me pausing, against my better judgement. “What do you mean?”
“It’s none of my business, but Vani says it’s bad that your man is messing about with that new girl. She’s already damaged. She doesn’t need to spend time with you freaks. It will only make her worse.”
My mind immediately goes to Cain, but Saint isn’t finished. That smug smile curves one corner of his lips higher.
“From your expression, I’m guessing you haven’t heard.”
I grit my teeth. “Just fucking spit it out, Saint. It’s obvious that you can’t wait to tell me.”
He gives a low chuckle. “You’re right, I’m enjoying this moment too much. Maybe I should keep this to myself.”
My mind is spinning. What went down in the bar?
Who is messing with the new girl? It must be Cain he’s talking about, right?
Has he been screwing around with Ophelia?
To my surprise, a stab of jealousy goes through me.
It’s a betrayal, but I’m not sure if I’m jealous of her messing around with my friend, or worse, jealous of him messing about with her.
“Cain,” I growl, wanting to get in before Saint has the chance to lord it over me. “I know what he’s been up to.”
But Saint raises his eyebrows, and his eyes widen in seemingly genuine surprise. “No, not Cain, or at least not as far as I saw, but maybe he’s dicking her as well. It was Malachi who I saw locking lips with Ophelia in the bar the other night.”
Something in my chest tightens. Malachi.
Fucking Malachi —after I’d told him to stay away from Ophelia, too.
No wonder the asshole has been avoiding me.
He must have known this little piece of information was going to get back to me at some point.
Does Cain know, too? Have the two of them been conspiring against me?
My hand goes to my flick knife in my pocket. I’m just about ready to cut out Saint’s tongue for the information he’s just fed me. They say don’t blame the messenger, but I’m looking for any excuse to hurt him.
Saint grins. “What’s wrong? Have Cain and Malachi been fucking the new girl without you?”
With a growl, I yank the knife from my pocket and lunge at him.
He rears back, planting his hands on the ground behind him, and kicking out with one leg.
His boot connects with the hand holding the knife, and it flies out of my grip.
He seems to consider going for it but then changes his mind and scrambles to his feet.
“Fucking psycho,” Saint spits at me as he gathers his things together.
He must have decided I’m not worth getting stabbed over, as he turns and jogs away, laughing and flipping the bird over one shoulder.
Asshole. I don’t go after him. I don’t really want to get thrown out of college for knifing another student.
I’m still biding my time here and putting plans into place.
Anyway, I think I made my point. Don’t fucking mess with me.
Unfortunately, my fellow Preachers don’t seem to have gotten that message.
They say jealousy is green, but right now it’s white hot and burning its way through me.
Malachi had kissed her. What had her lips felt like?
Soft and willing. What had her breath tasted like?
How pliable had her body been, pressed up against his?
Why did she choose him? Isn’t she supposed to be fragile?
Innocent? Like Saint says, she shouldn’t be messing around with freaks like us, but did she like it?
Was she wet?
Fuck, I’m getting hard again. How the hell am I going to control this with her around?
I can’t, I realize. She has to go. But how am I going to make her leave, and, if the other two want to keep her around, will me wanting her to leave break us apart?
Is there something I can find out about her that will stop Cain and Malachi from obsessing over her?
Cain said she’d gone missing when she was young. Where had she been all that time? I assume the answer has something to do with the way she dresses and acts. She seems so innocent. Is she? How innocent? Is she a virgin?
Fuck. The possibility jumps into my head and makes me even harder. An untouched pussy. Has she even had a man’s finger inside her? Has she had one of her own?
I groan and drop to my haunches, covering my face with my hands.
Maybe the reason behind me wanting Ophelia to leave isn’t because I’m trying to save the others, but because I’m trying to save myself?
My head is spinning, trying to figure out the best path to take.
I have both Cain and Malachi’s hair, so I could try to change their ways by imploring the gods.
That would be a betrayal of its own kind, though, and I don’t think they’d forgive me if they knew I’d tried to manipulate their behavior in such a way.
There is another option, of course. I could go directly to the problem.
I could speak to Ophelia.
It hadn’t worked the first time I’d spoken to her in the cafeteria, but perhaps I’d gone about things the wrong way.
Is it possible she might understand what I’m asking of her? What if I bare my soul? Explain to her we’re trying to do something important here, and having the other two distracted won’t work?
It might work, or it might make her angry at me. Maybe she’d go and tell Cain. He is protective of her; I saw it the moment he laid eyes on her for the first time. Jesus, Malachi is playing with fire.
How will Cain react to the information that Malachi kissed Ophelia? Has the news gotten back to him yet, or…was Saint right, and the two of them have been screwing with her behind my back? It would explain why there have been no fireworks from Cain.
My grip tightens around the knife. Then a small smile tugs at my mouth because there’s one way for me to find out for sure.
Cain won’t be able to hide his anger at what Mal’s done if he truly didn’t know.
If I tell him, and he’s as protective as I believe, he’s going to want Mal’s head on a spike, which means Mal will have to face Cain and me together.
Christ, there are so many ways all of this can backfire.
This girl really could be the end of us.