Chapter 5
Julianna was gorgeous. There was no getting around it. It was a waste of time to try to handle her like every part of me didn’t practically tense up every time I was near her. It was so fucking adolescent the way I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I was sitting on my couch, trying to come up with a reason to call her. I didn’t even want to text, because I actually wanted to hear her voice. She had a feminine voice, high-pitched but throaty at the same time. Sweet and sexy. That was what she was…sweet and sexy…and sad. She was definitely sad.
Grief was whooping her ass. I could definitely empathize. Being in the throes of grief was crazy work. I knew firsthand how you could go weeks and months feeling like you were finally getting back to yourself, feeling like you were coping with your loss, and handling it in a healthy manner, only to be mercilessly dragged back down into a pit when you least expected it. You could be in a busy season, up to your neck in responsibilities and things to do. You didn’t even have to look at a calendar. Somehow, your body just knew—your mind knew the person’s birthdate or death date or funeral date was approaching. And down you went.
Those moments were few and far between for me at this point, but I remembered that time in my life. I remembered when I felt like I would never be able to truly celebrate Emerald’s birthday and not just tolerate it. I didn’t think I would ever be able to smile at memories on her death date, but I got there. The fact that I got there gave me faith that Julianna would eventually get there, too.
I dialed her number.
“Hey, Nico.” Her voice was soft as it floated from my phone and into my living room since I had her on speaker.
“What’s up, lil bit? I didn’t wake you up, did I?” I quickly checked my watch. It was a little after 9:00 p.m..
“Nah. It’s early. Anyway, I don’t really sleep.”
“You don’t really sleep? What does that mean? Shit, I love sleep. Sleep is like my side chick. I’m trying to get up with her every chance I get. Her ass better not ever think about ghosting me.”
She giggled. “I wish. Sleep stay ghosting me. She’s real petty, too. Sometimes, I fall asleep right away, but then I wake up about 1:00 or 2:00 a.m., and I’m just up. I’m playing on my phone…or thinking thoughts that I don’t want to think. Other times, I lay in bed for hours and hours. By the time I finally drift off, it’s time to get up and start the day.”
“Are you one of those people who let’s stuff work out on its own, or have you tried anything?”
“I’ve tried things, but I probably don’t give them enough time to work before I give up on them. I need to do something, though. I know that I need sleep, but right now, I just need a minute to get away from the thoughts running through my head.”
I was quiet for a moment, contemplating.
“Yo,” I said finally, “I know this will probably sound all kinds of sketchy, but I might have a remedy for you to relax and shut your brain down long enough for you to get some sleep.”
“Is this an invitation to have sex with you, Nico?” The words came out through her chuckles.
I chuckled too. “Nah. This is about you presenting me with an issue and me possibly having the means to fix said issue. I own a body shop, lil bit. I’m a natural-born fixer.”
“Oh, okay. Natural-born fixer…right.”
“You up for coming through?”
“So, this is something that has to be done at your place? You can’t come through here and do it?”
I hesitated. “I mean, I could. But it would take a lot more work. It’s better to do it here. You want me to come scoop you?”
“I guess so,” she said with a sigh. “If you’re about to do something to me that’s going to make me sleepy, I probably shouldn’t be on the roads.”
“True. Pack a small bag.”
“A spend-the-night bag? Bro!”
I laughed heartily. “Not a spend-the-night bag, lil bit. But you might end up spending the night.”
“And this is not about sex?”
“Nah. This is about helping you relax, shut down your brain, and possibly get a good night’s rest.”
“I feel like I shouldn’t believe you.”
I laughed again. “Okay. Okay. When people get relaxed and let themselves go, sometimes their inhibitions lower as well. Dicks get hard, pussies get wet, but that’s just biology. That’s not the goal. I’mma do my best to stand on business and keep my dick to myself. I’m trying to be a friend here.”
“Okay,” she agreed. “How soon should I be ready?”
* * *
About an hour or so later, I arrived back at my place with Julianna in tow. I parked in the driveway then walked around and opened the car door for her.
“Wow.” She looked up at the edifice of my home. “Okay, first of all, I was expecting a high-rise building either in the middle of Downtown or on the Northside. You know? A condo in the sky?”
“Yeah, I’ve lived that lifestyle.” I led her up the walkway to the front door. “I had the view of Lake Michigan, the door man, and the assigned parking spot. The place had a swimming pool, a gym, and even a grocery store on site. When I hit my thirties, I decided that I wanted something different. I had just purchased this house. It was supposed to be an investment property, a quick flip with a few cosmetic touches and a few updates. The more I thought about the location and the bones of the house, the more it seemed like something to consider.” I unlocked the door, pushed it open, and motioned for her to step inside the foyer.
“Oh, okay. You have a grown man’s house, Nico. Now, how old did you say you were? You’re the second-oldest Hill brother. I know that Dolton is thirty-six because he’s two years older than Jianna. So, you’re older than thirty-six but younger than Dominic, who’s probably forty.”
I chuckled. “I’m thirty-eight. What makes you say that I have a grown man’s house?”
“The fact that you have real furniture.” She handed me her coat, then worked her way out of her shoes before running a hand lightly over the console table that sat beside the shoe rack. She walked deeper into my home. “You have a real sofa—a Chesterfield, not a futon or something. You spent real money on that.” She caught my eye as she looked over her shoulder, giving me an approving glance.
“This ain’t my first rodeo, lil bit. I’ve furnished a place with furniture from IKEA. I was ready to do something different.”
“Well, I like it,” she assured me. “I like the color scheme and the entire vibe. It kinda reminds me of Dolton’s house, the one he had before he married Jianna. It was warm and inviting.”
I grinned at her. “Thanks. Let me show you where we’re gonna be.”
My home was a four-bedroom, two-and-half-bath Craftsman home with two stories. We stayed on the first floor, where I had an extra room that was probably meant for guests. Since any overnight guests that I entertained usually slept in my bedroom, I didn’t have use for a guestroom. I led Julianna to the doorway of the room.
She slowly stepped inside, taking in the sight before her. The room was dark and moody with walls that were painted a deep charcoal, and the dark hardwood floors were covered with a plush black rug. The ambient lighting was provided by an artistic chandelier overhead and strategically placed unscented candles and spotlights. Oversized plants and trees sat in each corner. And in the middle of the room sat a sumptuous and lush massage table.
“It’s a massage room, and it’s gorgeous.” Julianna walked around the space, a faint smile on her face.
“Thank you. It was designed by a girl I was dating at the time. She was in design school, and she did this room as her final project.”
“She did a good job.” She ran her hand along the fleece table cover before turning her attention on me. “You give massages, Nico?”
“I do.”
“How’d you get into that?” She started coming out of her hoodie.
“That’s a long story, lil bit.”
“Are you like…certified and licensed?” She placed her hoodie on the massage chair and worked on shrugging out of her t-shirt.
“I am. I can legally operate in the state of Illinois.” I gave her a smirk.
She fiddled with the button on her jeans. “Is this a naked massage?”
“It’s whatever you want it to be, lil bit.”
She eyed me as she pushed her pants over her hips and ass. “I’m not shy about my body at all, Nico, but we will have to see each other at family events. If seeing my titties now then having to sit next to me when the baby Jianna is carrying gets baptized is going to embarrass you, speak now or forever hold your peace.”
I chuckled. “I promise you that wouldn’t embarrass me, but naked massages typically lead to…naked activities. So, why don’t you leave your bra and panties on?”
She quickly divested herself of the remaining items and turned to me expectantly.
“What’s next?”
“You can get on the table. Please lie on your stomach, and pull the sheet up to your waist. I’m going to change right quick. There’s chilled water in the mini fridge.” I gestured toward it. “Drink. I need you to stay hydrated.”
“Okay,” she agreed before sashaying across the room in the direction of the mini fridge. Each sway of her hips was rhythmic and hypnotizing. I fought to pull my gaze away from the globes of her ass cheeks. They were completely visible thanks to the thong she wore. Once I was out from under her spell, I left the room.
Julianna
When Nico invited me over with the promise of helping me shut down my brain so that I could get some much needed sleep, I did not expect a massage…let alone an entire room dedicated to the practice. I couldn’t resist the smile that bloomed on my face. Much like my father, Nico was a “fixer.” There wasn’t a situation, frustration, or conundrum that you could present to Gianni Outlaw that he wouldn’t try to fix. He believed that real men were providers, protectors, and problem solvers for the women in their life.
As he raised his three daughters, he made it a point to drill his personal motto into us— Men should toil. Women should be spoiled .
My eldest sister, Jia, agreed with him wholeheartedly. She’d married young, and went from being dependent on our father to being dependent on her husband. Luckily for Jia, her husband, Langston, lived by the same creed. He spoiled his wife rotten. Jia had never worked a job a day in her life. Her only responsibilities in life were to take care of her husband, her two boys, and the home front.
My middle sister, Jianna, had too much brain power to just sit around and be spoiled by a man. She was a certified genius who had to always be theorizing, hypothesizing, and learning. Her head would probably explode if she didn’t get out into the workforce to rub elbows and exchange information with other brilliant minds in her field. And luckily for her as well, her husband, Dolton, understood her. He encouraged her to research, learn, and strive as much as she wanted to. He spoiled Jianna as much as Langston spoiled Jia.
Personally, I hadn’t met the man who I felt was trustworthy enough to lean on the way Jia leaned on Langston. Men could be duplicitous, and I’d seen one too many occasions where they used their financial standing as leverage to control and bully their partner. So, while my man was out in the world toiling, I would be out there, too. Still, it was cool that Nico had some characteristics that reminded me of my daddy.
I took a long sip from the bottle of water then set it on top of the mini fridge before situating myself on the massage table. I decided that because Nico’s table was stationary, he’d definitely had it custom made. It was firm but comfy. Just lying there with my eyes closed, waiting on his return, had me feeling like I could drift off to sleep. And the room smelled so good—like cucumbers with a hint of mint. I breathed in deeply through my nose then let it out slowly through my mouth the way the sleep therapist I’d seen suggested that I do. I concentrated on the steady beating of my heart, the rise and fall of my chest, and the sound of my breath leaving my mouth.
I heard Nico reenter the room. I lifted my neck and found him standing inside the doorway. He’d changed out of his jeans and sweater and was now wearing a black t-shirt and matching basketball shorts.
“Relax your neck, lil bit. It’s not good to hold it at that angle for too long.”
“Sorry, but I wanted to see you.”
“The things you say with that mouth,” he mumbled.
The next sound I heard was some man whose voice I didn’t recognize crooning some slow, sexy tune.
“Are you serious right now?” I asked from where my face was pressed against the table.
“What can I say? I like 90s R&B.”
The room was silent except for the man who was singing about the fact that he was crying overtime. I felt Nico as he crossed the room toward the massage table. He fiddled around on the side table. I figured he was organizing his supplies. I closed my eyes again.
“I’mma be using oil. Is it cool if I remove your bra so it doesn’t get stained?”
“I’m cool with it getting stained,” I told him.
“Julianna.”
I barked out a laugh. “Sorry. I couldn’t resist. Yeah, you can take off my bra. You wanna take off my thong?”
“Stopped trying to get fucked, shorty. We agreed that everybody was keeping their…sexual organs to themselves.”
I pretended to sigh heavily. “Okay. Okay. I’ll keep my thong on.”
He chuckled and released the clasp on my bra.
I could hear him squirt oil into his hands. Then warm oil and his hands were on my back. The massage began with his hands firmly moving across the entire spectrum of my back. He moved across my skin quickly but with intention, and before I knew it, he zeroed in on my left shoulder blade. Strong palms and fingers worked in circles.
“Umm.” The moan floated from my lips, soft and drawn out.
“Umm,” I repeated as the motions of Nico’s hands seemed to release tension that I didn’t even know was there.
I’m definitely going to fall asleep , I thought to myself as I relaxed into his touch.
I wasn’t sure how long Nico rubbed my upper body. He managed to rub me into a state that was relaxation overload. All of that was shattered and my eyes flew open when I felt my body being dragged down the table.
The next thing I knew, my lower body was in his lap. I fought to turn around and see what was happening. It was hard for two reasons. One, my body felt boneless, like I had very little control over it. And two, I was at a really weird angle. I craned my neck, looking back to see that Nico was straddling the table with a leg on each side, and my lower body rested between them. The sheet that covered me from waist down was history as Nico’s hands made unobstructed contact with my back, ass, and the back of my thighs.
What kind of massage is this? one of the voices in my head questioned.
Uh, this negro is giving you an erotic massage , another voice responded.
“An erotic massage,” I whispered right before my hips were lifted into the air, leaving me in the perfect position to receive the kind of oral that would send me over the moon and probably make me Nico’s love slave for life.
Luckily, he kept his mouth and tongue to himself, but that didn’t stop my girl from leaking at the thought. I was almost positive that she was releasing pheromones and aromas that let him know exactly what type of time she was on. The way she was nestled right below his nose as he twisted my body from side to side—presumably stretching me but really just messing my head up.
He lowered me, my thighs resting on his. He concentrated on kneading both my lower back and ass. His touch was firm, gentle, exciting, and titillating. He switched his hand movement to long, slow strokes that travelled from the base of my neck to the tops of my thighs. His fingers dug lightly into my flesh, causing me to not only moan but to involuntarily writhe, arching my back and tensing. My body was on fire.
“Stop tensing, lil bit,” he said, which only caused me to tense more.
“You’re doing too much, Nico.” My voice was breathy and pitchy, even to my own ears. I struggled to string together words that both made sense and expressed my thoughts. “I’m gonna have an orgasm.”
That seemed to spur him on. He fisted the flesh of my ass cheeks.
Sexual frustration kicked in. “Ease the fuck up, Nico!”
He chuckled. “Oh, so this is you getting mad? You know I don’t give a shit about you getting mad, right?”
He flipped me over so that I was on my back in a very rough way. My rock hard nipples were pointed at the ceiling, my face was frowned, my chest rose and fell, while my vagina leaked and quaked behind the lacy fabric of the thong I’d chosen to wear. I hated it here, but I loved it so damn bad.
He pulled my body toward his. “Sit up, and drape your arms around me.”
His command left very little room for protest. And once I was back in his lap, this time with my vagina resting tentatively on his bricked-up hardness, I didn’t want to protest. What I wanted to do was rub my clit against his print until I created enough friction to get myself off. I threw my arms over his shoulders like he told me to, while he rubbed and rubbed and rubbed his strong hands up and down my back. My muscles melted under his touch.
“Nico,” I whined. “This isn’t relaxing. This is torture. I’m so horny.”
“So, take what you need from me.”
“What I need from you is either your mouth on my clit or you buried deep, deep, deep inside me.”
“You have a very dirty mouth, Julianna.”
“Are you gonna punish me?” I punctuated my question with small gyrations against his penis.
“Not right now. The hormones and your arousal are clouding your judgment. You’ll be cool when you come down.”
“Well, would you please stop doing all of this freaky stuff to me. It has me feeling the opposite of relaxed. I’ll be worse off than when I got here. I probably won’t sleep for weeks!”
“Little spoiled ass,” he muttered, before gently pushing me off of him. “Lay back.”
I settled back on the massage table. I was thankful for a reprieve from the contact of our bodies that was sending my need for sex into overdrive.
His hands found my naked breasts—weighing the heavy globes in his hands before beginning to massage them. He rolled my nipples, while those caramel brown eyes of his seemed to peer into my soul. After a few moments, he dropped my breasts and straddled the table once more. I was unprepared when he grabbed my calves and pushed my legs back so that they practically touched my ears. His face hovered above my vagina as he simultaneously inhaled my scent and opened me wider.
“Nico.” My voice was coated with lust.
He remained silent and stony faced. On and on, the massage went. Over and over, he handled my thigh muscles, rubbing and kneading them. His hands moved closer and closer to my vagina, but he never touched her. Over and over, he opened my legs wide, stretching me while simultaneously inhaling me.
“I’m gonna …” I announced.
Before I could get the sentence out, Nico’s hands were back at my breasts. Massaging, kneading, and tweaking until a powerful orgasm overtook me, and I quaked with pleasure beneath his prodding.
“You’re good,” he assured me as blissful sensations rolled through me. “Breathe through it, lil bit. When you come down, relax into the release of tension. Keep your eyes closed and breathe…in through your nose…out through your mouth.”
“I…”
He was still bothering my nipples, so the orgasm hadn’t fully subsided yet.
“Shhh.” His instruction was gentle but authoritarian. “I’m gonna turn you over. Keep your eyes closed. Concentrate on the things you can hear…the things you can smell.”
I helped him flip me back onto my stomach. I realigned my face with the hole in the table while keeping my eyes shut. Once I was settled, I felt him replace the sheet over my lower body. I smelled the scent of cucumber with a hint of mint. I heard the sounds of him pressing the pump of the oil bottle. Then I heard him rubbing his hands together. Seconds later, his hands were on me again. The massage began again. This time, the concentration was on my neck and shoulder blades. Soft music, a soul singer crooning, became noticeable. I kept my eyes shut and reminded myself to breathe in through my nose and out through my mouth.
* * *
I woke up, which meant that I had dozed off. I looked down as I stretched, realizing that I was still on the massage table.
“Umm,” I commented to myself before tossing the sheet I was covered with off and stretching again. “With his wannabe baby Gianni Outlaw head ass.”
I sat up on the table but almost fell off when I heard Nico’s voice.
“What are you over there rambling about?”
I jumped down, still clad in only my thong, watching Nico. He sat in the only chair in the room, staring at me.
“I said…” I walked toward him. “…that you’re a baby Gianni Outlaw wannabe.”
“Why is that?” His eyes never left mine.
“Because when people present you with problems, you feel compelled to come up with solutions.”
“I think the words you’re looking for are pronounced thank you .”
“Whatever.” I stood in front of him and waved him off. “How long was I asleep?”
He checked his watch. “About four hours. It’s almost 3:00 a.m.”
“Long enough for you to believe me when I tell you that my original arousal has worn off, and I still want to have sex with you?”
“On the massage table?”
“On the massage table. It’s custom. It’ll hold up.”
“How do you know it’s custom?”
“By the quality of it. And I’m sure I won’t be the first woman you take down on that massage table.”
He didn’t respond to that. Instead, he asked, “What are you thinking you want?”
I blushed and giggled at the question, but I didn’t back down. I was a little bit embarrassed by my own forwardness, but I wanted the dick. And closed mouths didn’t get…fucked.
“I want to be face down, ass up with your mouth where it was before…except…closer.”
He laughed aloud. “Basically you want me to eat your pussy? Is that what I’m hearing?”
I wasn’t generally a shy girl, but something about the way Nico handled me made me blush.
“If that’s what you heard, then that’s probably what you should do,” I told him as I practically skipped over to the massage table.
“Damn, girl. You really want this mouth on you.”
I turned and faced him. “I really want it all, Nico.”
“You got it, mama.” He inclined his head toward me. “Take your shit off.”
I was out of that thong in less than a second flat. He laughed again with a shake of his head. Then I watched him strip bare—his thick, pretty dick bobbing as it bounced out of his drawers. He stopped by the table that held his massage accoutrement, opened a drawer, and pulled something out.
When he saw me watching him, he spoke. “Get on the table, and lay on your stomach.”
I did as he told me, and shortly thereafter, he straddled the table at the other end. Once he was settled, he placed one hand under each of my thighs and pulled me back on him. Two seconds later, my lower body was in the air, my legs were spread wide, and I was balanced on my shoulders.
Nico released one of my legs momentarily to toss something towards me. “Hold on to this, and give it to me when I ask for it.”
Since I couldn’t really see, because my neck was at a weird angle, I rooted around until my hand came in contact with a packet. I knew it was a condom. Before I could even secure it in my fist, Nico swiped his tongue across my opening. My body tried to buckle, but his grip on me held me up.
“Where you going? You asked for this.”
Clearly, that was rhetorical. I hadn’t even managed to formulate a response before his mouth was back on me.
The way I wanted to slowly, and shit, quickly gyrate against his mouth was criminal. But the way he was holding me allowed me precious little control of the way I could move my lower body. The most I could do was lightly push my coochie toward his mouth.
“Nico,” I moaned. My head was turned to the side. My cheek was literally pressed into the massage table. “Please.”
Oral sex was my kryptonite. The man whose cunnilingus skills could make me fall apart in that…certain way could own me forever. Nico was well on his way to receiving a bill of sale for my soul with the way he was sucking it out of my vagina.
Nico responded to my pleas and moans by inviting his teeth to the party. He sucked my clit between his teeth, flicking it repeatedly until I couldn’t do anything but writhe in ecstasy.I hummed and whimpered out my fondness for his proficiency.
Time slowed as he ate me with a patience that was applaudable. I moaned, screamed, and thrashed, wondering when the torturous pleasure would end but wanting it to last into eternity at the same time.
This man is driving me insane .
“Please, Nico. More,” I cried as I felt the familiar tsunami begin to build in my stomach.
My body began to tense. My thighs quivered. My back buckled, and only the strength of Nico’s hold on me kept me from coming out of the position I was in. Then I was falling over the edge with screams and shudders and him lapping hungrily at my pooling essence.
Nico let me down gently, and I forced myself not to consider how many times he’d practiced letting women down from the position he’d just had me in. Instead, I concentrated on trying to control the trembles moving through my thighs. He stood from the massage table and spoke.
“Hand me the package, lil bit.” His voice was gruff, and when I looked up at him, his beard glistened with my wetness.
I handed him the condom and waited somewhat impatiently for him to slip it on. Once the condom was secured, Nico rejoined me on the massage table. He climbed up my body, the weight of him providing a comfort. When our faces were parallel, he gave me a sloppy kiss. I kissed him back, tasting both the flavor of him and myself on his luscious lips.
We kissed and we kissed and we kissed. Before long, I felt him push my legs back slightly and slide inside me. I groaned at him filling me, at the stretching of it, and at the bliss of it all.
The kissing didn’t stop while Nico deep stroked me, using the flexibility of the muscles he’d just loosened to spread my legs wide. He held my legs open as he buried himself inside me over and over again, going deep as if he was hunting for the lost treasure. He released my legs, and I took that opportunity to wrap them around his waist. His hands found their way to my hair, and he tangled his fingers into the thick strands, pulling and massaging.
“Nico...” I whimpered. My mind was foggy, yet at the same time, it was sharp with the sensations of intense pleasure coursing through it.
Everything about the encounter we were sharing was intensely intimate. I felt open and vulnerable. His hands glided over my body, causing goosebumps to appear along my skin.