Chapter 38
Mercy
I always imagined that sex with Kane would be a wild, untamed thing. Heart racing, hair pulling, grabbing and pushing and pulling, until either my mascara is running down my eyes from the pain or the pleasure.
The reality is that it’s a little bit of both.
His kisses turn tender as he whispers praise in my ear, muttering more for himself than for me, I think, to keep from ramming his cock too deep or stretching me so far that I tear at the seams. Every press of his hips against mine is a slow, careful pressure, the drag of his cock along my inner walls sending spasms through my body.
I hold onto him as he carves space inside of me for himself, charting a path that neither Zane or Sam can touch.
There are parts of me that only Kane can experience, and I think he understands that.
The brush of his hand over my hair or down my waist, our mingled breaths turning into one, my hand holding his heart until our rhythm syncs.
Sweat slicks his golden skin, glistening like summer rain on the horizon.
He touches me gently, coaxing kisses from my lips, until all of a sudden, something changes.
The pressure builds into a crescendo as he pumps faster and his hand on my hip digs deeper.
His teeth scrape against the curve of my neck, the sharp points of his canines stinging my flesh.
And the push knocks my body higher up the mattress.
Pain blossoms where our bodies meet as his hips slam into mine and his breathing turns ragged, the warmth of his body reaching a fever pitch.
I dig my fingertips into his shoulders and break the skin, feeling the way his body shudders as he pumps harder, slamming home with enough force that the air in my lungs isn’t enough.
I’m drowning in Kane’s love.
It washes over me like a tidal wave, crashing into my ribs, filling up my lungs, burning through my bloodstream. His cock hits the end of my pussy and continues pushing, ramming hard into my cervix.
I gasp for air.
My world spins with Kane as its axis, the pleasure quickly turning to pain, the radiance of his light too bright, the hard planes of his body cutting like glass.
“Kane,” I breathe, cradling his face in my hands.
“Baby, it hurts. Stop. Please.” A tear slides down my cheek.
I should have never taken Kane to bed on my own.
There’s a reason why I wanted Sam here. Zane.
Anyone. Someone to pull Kane back from the brink, because it’s becoming clear that my strength isn’t enough.
He’s overpowering me in every possible way, and I’m going to break.
“Kane!” I growl, clawing his face. “Fucking stop!”
His eyes instantly clear and his body freezes in place, his cock twitching halfway inside my body. “Siren? What’s wrong?” Leaning into my touch, he blows out a breath across my neck. “Am I hurting you?”
I swallow hard. “Yes, but—”
He immediately pulls out, and the sudden lack stings. I hiss as he rolls off of me and pulls my thighs apart to check me out down there, frowning with concern as he scans my pussy. “You look okay. I don’t see any bleeding.”
I cover my face with my hands. “I don’t know, I just hurt. Deep. Like, like you were hitting my—” I bite my lip. “Cervix,” I whisper, my face flaming with embarrassment. “I don’t think I’ve ever, um, felt that before.”
Kane slides his gaze up my body, the hunger in his eyes lingering like a fire that won’t go out despite a downpour.
“You’re bruised.” He bends at the waist and kisses my hip, then the bottom rung of my ribs, the very top of my breast, until finally, he licks a stripe along the curve of my neck.
With a groan, he slides his fingers into my hair. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
Tears pool in my eyes. “I know.”
That isn’t an apology.
Still hiding, I clear my throat. “I want to keep going, but…” My body trembles as he teases the underside of my breast. “I don’t know if I can. I—” I bite my lip. “I think I’m not made for this?”
A smile curves on Kane’s handsome face. “Oh, baby, you are. I promise. I’m impressed that we made it this far, honestly.
” He kisses my forehead and trails his fingertips along the curve of my cheek.
“I’m really glad that you spoke up, or I could have hurt you more than I did.
A lot of people grit their teeth and bear it without telling me, so I don’t always realize that their screams are from pain.
” He nips my jaw. “Rather than pleasure.”
I blow out a breath. “You have to be kidding. There’s no way anyone can withstand that.” A thread of insecurity wraps around my heart. “But, um, if they did, I’m sure you enjoyed it.”
“Actually, no.” Tilting my chin up, Kane meets my eyes.
“I might come, Mercy, but that isn’t the goal.
Sex is supposed to be fun. Free. It clears the mind until all that’s left is the weight of your body and the beat of your heart.
” He presses his open palm to my chest and taps his fingertips to my heartbeat.
It’s like everything I’ve learned about sex in school is wrong.
Frowning, I purse my lips as he smiles down at me with the patience of a saint—more than I thought he could ever have, honestly. “But Zane and Sam always come. It’s like they chase it.” I reach out and grasp the air beside Kane’s head. “Don’t you do the same thing?”
He shakes his head. “I’m built differently.
The same rules don’t apply.” He presses a gentle kiss to my lips before sitting up.
“Let me clean you up, and we can cuddle all you want.” He kisses my knee and pushes himself to his feet, his hard cock bouncing with each step he takes, its shaft shiny, the tip leaking.
If he was close to coming, he stopped because I asked him to.
My heart skips a beat as I watch him grab a pack of sanitary wipes and two bottles of water. “Kane,” I call out, smiling as he looks over at me. “I love you.”
The warmth in his eyes rivals that of the sun. He drops everything on the floor beside me and falls to his knees, quickly sweeping me into a searing kiss. “Keep saying that, and I might have to eat you out again.”
“Please, no,” I beg, already feeling my pussy twinge at the thought. “I can’t take it.”
“Mmm,” he muses, teasing the seam of my lips with his tongue. “You think too little of yourself—and your pussy. She’s a fighter.” He curls his arm around my waist and smiles. “Someday, I’ll prove it to you.”
My final semester of college passes by in the blink of an eye.
Kane doesn’t drop out despite failing our fall painting class for not submitting a final project, and he walks behind me across the stage despite not receiving a diploma.
I think he just wanted to check out my ass in high heels, a gift from my older sister that I don’t think I’ll ever wear again.
Still, she’s right.
I look damn good when I dress up.
The curls in my hair have flattened into waves by the time the ceremony is over.
A moth flutters nearby, and I hold out my hand to give it a place to land.
My classmates either smile politely at me or completely ignore me, the few of them who know about the party from last semester being in the latter category.
Sam hasn’t returned to campus despite being reenrolled once he petitioned his father’s meddling in his affairs.
I think he was only enrolled as a distraction from his home life, and now that he lives with me, he has no reason to continue.
My father is all too happy to hand him and Kane the keys to the family business, degree or not.
I walk arm-in-arm with my brother Malachi as the boys bicker about what to eat for dinner behind us. “You know, you could enroll. It’s not that bad of a school.”
He’s quiet as he contemplates. Actually, he’s been quiet ever since the new year, like he’s stuck in his head about something. “I might apply,” he says after a moment. “But I don’t think my grades are good enough to get in.”
“Anyone can get in.” I nudge his ribs with my elbow and glance back at Kane. “Case in point…”
My blonde boyfriend catches my eye and winks, a slow grin spreading across his face as he lifts an eyebrow and looks me up and down. “Hot,” he mouths, the corner of his lips curving into a smirk.
Zane catches him in the act and rolls his eyes. “I can’t believe you walked across the stage.” Still, he smiles when Kane presses a kiss to his cheek and laughs when Kane grabs his chin and smushes their faces together.
“You’re just jealous that I got to flick off the Dean.”
My father’s waiting for us at the gate with a bouquet of white lilies in his hands.
When he sees us, his shoulders droop as he relaxes, the smile on his face becoming genuine.
I think he worries about Malachi adjusting to life with the family plus three, the knuckleheads I love breathing new life into our home.
It’s a little chaotic when someone eats Zane’s leftovers—usually Kane—or Sam decides to join us in the chapel for a sleepover, but it’s a good kind of chaos.
It’s what we’ve been missing over the past few years.
The six of us pass through the gate to the city cemetery, and my father hands each of us a flower from the bouquet. Walking the stone path reminds me of a night not too long ago when someone glimpsed a grim reaper stalking his prey, and a girl stumbled into a grave and fell into his arms.
I slip free from my brother’s arm and leave him to walk with my father to our family crypt. We moved my mother onto our property as soon as the ice melted, but our ancestors are laid to rest here. It’s good to pay our respects to the dead.
Matching my pace to my men, I hook one of my arms in Zane’s and another in Sam’s. They both slide their hands into mine, but Sam’s the one who kisses my knuckles. “Congrats, baby.”
“Wait until you see your present,” Kane murmurs, wrapping his arm around Zane’s shoulders. “You’re going to love it.”
“Don’t tell her.” Zane glares at our boyfriend. “You’ll ruin the surprise.”
I pull our foursome down a separate path.
“Before we celebrate our future, I wanted to honor our past.” Sam quirks an eyebrow but doesn’t comment, while Kane and Zane quickly pick up on our destination.
We round the bend and walk a ways before we come across the Carrera family plot.
I lay my flower against a familiar tombstone. “Rest in peace, Alejandro.”
Sam squeezes my hand before laying his flower over mine.
But it’s Kane that surprises me, dropping to one knee in front of the grave and laying his palm flat to the earth.
“Alejandro, I know you don’t need to hear this, but look after Maria.
Treasure your time together, wherever the fuck you are.
You deserve happiness.” He digs a hole with his fingers and sticks the stem of his lily upright so that, with a little effort, it stands straight. “I’m sorry if I took any from you.”
Zane helps Kane to his feet and kisses him softly. “You’re both happy now, and that’s what matters.” He tears off the long stem and tucks his flower into Kane’s shirt pocket. “He’s with the people he loves, and so are you.”
They share a moment that brings tears to my eyes, and Sam cups my cheek as he wipes them away. “What’s wrong, Mercy?”
I shake my head. “No, it’s… nothing’s wrong.” I laugh a little, feeling foolish for getting so emotional about people I never met. “I just wish that everyone here could be happy, too.”
“Who says they’re not?” Lacing our fingers together, Sam presses a kiss to the corner of my lips. “If what Grandma Star says is true, people hang around after they’re gone.”
“When the veil is thinnest,” I clarify. “I didn’t realize you’ve been taking notes.”
He puffs out a breath as he fights a smile. “Well, if I want the honor of your hand in marriage, Mercy, I should pay attention to the things your grandmother says. She could curse our union, after all. I’m still convinced that she’s part witch.”
“You—” My eyes widen. Nervous tingles trickle down my arms. “What did you say?”
“Your grandma. She’s a witch.”
“No, not that part. The other part.” A blush dusts my cheeks as warmth fills my heart. “What you said first.”
The corner of his lip twitches. “Oh, you mean the part about marrying you?” His emerald eyes sparkle in the flickering lamplight.
“I already got your dad’s permission, so all I need now is your grandmother’s blessing.
Do you think she’ll say yes? I didn’t get her anything for her birthday last year, so I don’t know if she still likes me—”
I leap into Sam’s arms and squeal as he spins me around. “You can’t be serious! Sam!”
Kane’s voice rumbles nearby. “What did he say?”
“He said that he’s going to marry her.”
“Oh, hell no. Not without fighting me for it.”
Zane scoffs and grabs Kane by the nape of his neck. “You know the only person putting a ring on your finger is me.”
“Look at what you’ve done,” I gasp, smiling against Sam’s lips. “You’ve started a trend.”
“A bad one,” Zane grumbles, fighting to hold Kane back. He’s glaring daggers into the back of Sam’s head. “He’s gonna wanna marry both of us.”
“You’re damn right, I am!”
I double over with laughter, unable to stop the flow of tears.
My heart soars as the three of them crack smiles, with Zane breaking first. He laughs as much as me, grabbing my wrist and stealing me away from Sam.
“Mercy.” Once he catches his breath, he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear and pulls me in for a hug.
“Congratulations. Although, I’m not sure what to congratulate you on anymore: a degree or a wedding. ”
I bury my face in Zane’s chest and let him hold me. The steady beat of his heart quiets mine down. “I haven’t said yes yet.” I haven’t even thought about marriage before. I was never one of those girls who made finding love a priority.
Zane hums softly. “I guess we’ll see who the winner is. My money’s on Sam.”
Sputtering, Kane throws his arms over both of our shoulders. “Hey! Whose side are you on?”
“Mine,” Zane chuffs, rolling his eyes. “You can’t marry two people, Kane, and I call dibs if you’re serious about it.”
Shaking my head, I meet Sam’s eyes as he walks over to us, a confident smile playing on his lips. He doesn’t have to say anything, because it’s written all over his face.
No matter who marries who, we’re stuck with each other in this life and every life after.